Jessika
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2003 30 July :: 3.57am
:: Mood: awake
:: Music: olp in my head
screw u leave me alone!!!!!!!asshole
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Visionary, revolutionary, vigilante - these descriptions all fit you well. You are thoroughly disgusted with society and humanity as a whole, and you have several rather diabolical plans to reshape it to fit your designs. You're probably a loner, and most people think you're crazy. That's just because they don't understand, though, and you'll show them someday anyway. Heh heh heh. You are known to become very passionate about many causes, have torrid love affairs, and be seen as a either a demagogue or a hero to the proletariat masses.
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Be cool! Take the What Do You Want Out Of Life? Quiz
2 truthsooth sayers |
lie
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Jessika
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2003 30 July :: 2.51am
:: Mood: giggly
:: Music: me singin to my song..*purple headed yogurt slinger*
Trallalalalalalalllaaaaaaaaaaa
la dee da dee da dee daaaaaaaaaaa!!! anyhow,....this is a poem me and tiph put our brainpower together to write...not completely done yet but o well who gives a fuck
I shall drown u in my tears
Suffocate u in my hate
I'll strangle u with my fears
dont try to change now, you're already too late
now the trust is gone
for now i can see
your ignorance, disblief
all strains of your conterfeit personality
for these emotions are vindictive
scratching at the walls of my soul
begging to be freed
their strength i no longer control
my dove of compassion is dead
now completely im desensitized
never to feel again
for the lies in your eyes
i shall drown you in my tears
the hate will pour like rain
to smother your stupid little world
so i'll be free once again
ya know what??? itd be cool to make this into a song.....too bad its not gonna happen kuz why in the fuck would i need a song!??!?! and i have no musical abilities so yah guess that sucks!!! o well!!!!!!!!! doo be doo be dooooo dobedobe do be do be doooooooo!!!!!!!!
1 truth |
lie
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silversoldier
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2003 29 July :: 9.03pm
:: Mood: quiet
:: Music: "Why Not".... I don't know where I got that.....
neh?
yes, I'm hearing Hillary Duff in my head right now... kinda scary....
Anyways.... I am officially back (although I have been back since saturday afternoon....). And, I'll be leaving again Saturday morning... yay me.
hm.... I don't know if I really have anything to say on here.... oh! yes I do.
This is my little poem that I made up in my head at church camp (the camp was about rites of passage... grr camp grr) anyways... it's a little cheesy... but I like cheese! yum!
Though I may not see through dark clouds,
I've created a path that I can trust.
I built it from my beliefs and friends.
And if my path should enter a storm,
I trust that every stone I laid
Will find its way to lead me out.
yeah... so that was special.... anyways, I'm done being all "oh, friends, I love you so much! let's kiss and hug for the cause (THE CAUSE!!)"... never my the "the cause" part.... yeah....
3 truthsooth sayers |
lie
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Jessika
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2003 28 July :: 5.16am
:: Mood: u tell me
:: Music: and i hope to god i figure out whats wrong
DEATH.....just another part of life
*and if i dont make it know that i loved u all along just like sunny days that we ignored because were all dumb and jaded*
i was thinkin about stuff and i have my suicide/funeral song..i spose i have for quite a while now...and that got me thinkin...what would my funeral be like for when i do commit suicide?
*walked around my good intentions and found that there were none*
it will prolly be very small and i dont know where and i know who will be there and for what reasons and who would actually sad
*then a phone call made me realize im wrong*
who i would dedicate my song to...nobody has actually wanted to think...
*and if i dont make it know that i loved u all along*
why do i even attempt to bore ppl with my life? they shall not have to be bored with my death kuz if they are(i know who they will be) they just pay no attention...no harm done there...
*and i hope to god i figure out whats wrong*
its kinna like i saw it all like i was ghostlike and nobody could see me but i could see them all and i know my mom would be more ashamed than anything of me kuz suicide is a sin so she cant let anybody know the truth
i have to go now i cant type
lie
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Jessika
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2003 25 July :: 2.39am
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: love stories
im leavin in 2 days *cries*
find your element
at mutedfaith.com.
1 truth |
lie
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Jessika
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2003 23 July :: 12.58am
:: Music: afi in my head and ac
and just to let u all know i am an outsider stereotype
Find your Role-Playing
Stereotype at mutedfaith.com.
You are Dark. The name says a lot, you enjoy the
nightside of things. You might be prone to
depression, but if you are, it's certainly not
to the degree that everyone assumes. You have a
wry, if sometimes morbid sense of humor and a
deep appreciation for fading beauty. You focus
on death a lot, but only because you have a
facination with change and passing, and the
unknown. Plus- black is pretty.
Art Thou? -Your Art Style Personality
brought to you by Quizilla
2 truthsooth sayers |
lie
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Jessika
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2003 22 July :: 9.05pm
:: Mood: aggravated
:: Music: FAITH IS NOT BELIEVING GOD CAN....ITS BELIEVEING GOD WILL!!!!haahaaaa riiiiiiiiiiight..........
they are all fucking brainwashed and refuse to see it any other way!!!!!!
i found lots of evidence supporting how pentagrams are not evil and my mom got a dictionary but my evidence overuled hers and it even said how it was at one time used to represent christ's five wounds!but noooo...she then had nothing to say cept it was all a trick and how satanic i am kuz i wear it and when i asked her in the beginnin she didnt have any reason at all as to why it was evil in the first place. i am now very pissed at any christian wanting to object for no apparent reason kuz my mom made me mad and i have a tendency to take it out on any body and everybody. i am sooo pissed grr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ALSO she made me put on clothes today...i have walked around in a towel or nakee for the past 2 days and i was enjoying it greatly...i have no REASON to put on clothes so i was pissed again/more
3 truthsooth sayers |
lie
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Jessika
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2003 22 July :: 12.07am
does anybody have a tape recorder i could borrow asap?!?!??!?!?
6 truthsooth sayers |
lie
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Jessika
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2003 21 July :: 6.37pm
:: Mood: restless
:: Music: 311
tra la la BOOM dee yay shra la la BOOM dee yay
the mommy works til 7 today but i can see bai again so wooohoo!!!!
anybody that would like to help me and can write(i KNOW u all can for a fact) should help kuz yah i started to write sumtin but then my brain went byebye and i suck at writin and bein creative anyhow so yah since u all loooooooove me so much give me help ok that was dorky peace
1 truth |
lie
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Jessika
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2003 21 July :: 5.16am
:: Mood: curious
:: Music: bzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzz
im a pirate...ARR!!!
Your pirate name is:
Iron Bess Kidd
A pirate's life isn't easy; it takes a tough person. That's okay with you, though, since you are that person. Even though you're not always the traditional swaggering gallant, your steadiness and planning make you a fine, reliable pirate. Arr!
here yall go...... http://www.fidius.org/quiz/pirate.php
lie
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Jessika
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2003 21 July :: 4.02am
:: Mood: energetic
:: Music: u remind me of the babe....
dont tell me the truth hurts my child...kuz it hurts like hell
i want sumone like david bowie....the goblin king...to get me evrything...i also want those bubbles...ya know the ones that u can make be anything u want...and i wannna bubble with mysterious hot guy with makeup i end up dancin with in end.....i also reeellly wanna make out with sumone..dunno why..just do...preferably in the rain....i like rain=)..............schylar wants drugs...anyone wanna donate to the needy cause??
3 truthsooth sayers |
lie
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Jessika
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2003 21 July :: 2.48am
:: Mood: horny
:: Music: can ya guess if ya think really hard??heh....HARD....
hard...makes ya think of long if ur me......LONG...HARD...heh...heh....
i saw my baby cryin hard as babes could cry what could i dooo!......jump the magic jump......dance magic dance........u remind me of the babe(what babe) the babe with the power(what power) the power of voodoo(who do) u do!(do wut) remind me of the babe!!!! what kind of magic spell to use! thats right! its NOT fair!OOOOOOOOOOO.....
IM WATCHIN LABYRINTH=D=D=D=D!!!!!!!! r ya alls happy for me!??!?!?!?!??!?! i am dancin..er.....movin in a rhythmic pattern...around my living room......
DAVID BOWIE IS SOOOOOOOO HOT IN THIS MOVIE!!!!!!!!!!how old is he anyhow??!? bsides lots but o welll hes in makeup in those outfits and those tights and that BULGE..........mmmmm..............
lie
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Jessika
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2003 20 July :: 3.32pm
:: Mood: infuriated
:: Music: sister sister
fucking god damn fuck
i am to be on the fucking internet an hour a day IF that and not at all while the mom isnt here(i get on kuz i have NOTHING better to do) and in eureka...nope no computer at the boringest place ever.....schylar had an ...uhh...."argument" online with my mom and haaahaaa it was funny kuz my mom just said "grw up....get outta ur crib!" and schylar actually had stuff worth sayin to say and my mom sucks at arguin but i dont know who the "GOD" person is i think i should make em be bryce and how do i block my messenger or change it so u have to have a password again????i looked in the options and havent been able to find it.......the computer is goin down into my moms room where nobody can use it...whats the point of it!??! my mom "doesnt know where i will be living when we return from eureka" and i HOPE she lets me go to the fair.
last night we had a "happy well never see ehriz again" party kuz he is movin and bethy was happy so she went out and bought a cake and lots of candy and hats and stuff and made a makeshift ehris pinata outta a box and beat the crap outta it and twas fun!
lie
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Jessika
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2003 20 July :: 3.13pm
:: Mood: pissed off
:: Music: boy meets world and lil girl mumblin
uhhh...more later im bein watched like a hawk now
lie
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Jessika
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2003 19 July :: 5.52pm
:: Mood: anxious
:: Music: GOGOS!!!DAMN SCHYLAR!!...now its..uhh..im not sure
im at schylars
yup i am and if u didnt believe me ur dumb!!!!!WUT IN THE FUCK IS SHE PLAYIN!?!??!?!??!?anyhow bathy has gone missin kuz she was sposed to be here at 11 and she was but as we were asleep we didnt hear ..pause!!! MICHEAL JACKSON!!!!THATS WUT THIS SHIIIIT IS!!!NOOO MAKE HER STOP TORURE TORTURE!!!!I USUALLY DONT MIND TORTURE BUT THIS IS JUST PLAIN CRUEL!!!!........ok like i was sayin we didnt hear her pounding and ringin the bell surprisingly kuz bethy tends to be loud.
last night i started cryin for no apparent reason. it has been a long time since i have been anle to cry then BAMB for no apparent reason i just did! nobody noticed so :) but schylar was havin "difficulties" of her own so yah its all ok now i suppose
lie
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