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xxinterrupted

:: 2005 28 October :: 10.05pm
:: Mood: depressed

[The Basics]
Full name: Jena Maria Pust
Date of birth: 1-27-88
Gender: Female
Location: PA
Ethnicity: White
Zodiac sign: Aquarius.
Reason for taking survey: Bored, something to get being ditched AGAIN off my mind..

[Going Deeper]
If any, name any phobias you have: None that I know of.
Do you drink: Sometimes.
Do you smoke: No.
If any, what drugs have you done: Just smoked some weed.
Now do the same for your family: USA
Are you a junk food person or a healthy eater: Both.
Living arrangements: I live with my Aunt and Uncle.
Name any pets you have: None anymore..
Siblings: Two sisters Samantha and Anna.. and one brother Dustin, all who I miss very much.
Do you like your school: Do you like getting shot in the head? I don’t think so.
What is your favourite class: Career and Office Applications
What is your least favourite: I like all my classes.
What genre of movie do you prefer: Drama.
Are you into self categorization? No, I dress/act different all the time.


[Favorites]
Time of the year: Spring/Fall.
Friend: I don’t pick favorites.
Family member: I love most of my family, [[with a few exceptions]] I don’t have any favs.
Animal: None.
Sweet food: Depends on my mood.
Colour: Green.
Sitcom: Desperate Housewives, Greys Anatomy, Nip Tuck.
Cartoon: Scooby Doo.
TV channel: TNT
Pastime: Being with Jim
Drug: uhh.. none anymore.
Magazine: Cosmo
Games console: PS2.
Website: woohu.com
Swear word: Fuck.
Ice-cream flavour: Oreo.
Clothing brand, if any: Anything from Delias.
Store: Delias.
Place to relax: Jims
Place to shop: South Hills Village.
Place to party: Wherever.

[Do you believe in..]
God: Sometimes.
A counter-god, or devil: Yeah.
Reincarnation: No.
The Soul: Not really..
Evolution: Somewhat.
Angels: Somewhat.
Karma: YES
Do you celebrate Christmas: Yes.
How do you celebrate your birthday: Depends..
What is your religion: I’m not religious.
Does your family have any special customs: No.
Have you ever converted from another religion or atheism: No.
Are you a vegetarian: No.

[For the Older Kids, Sex!]
Are you a virgin: No
If applicable, did you like your first time: Yes..
Ever given head: Yes.
Ever done anal: Haha, yes.
Does S&M appeal to you: No.
Do you watch pornography: Yes.
How often do you masturbate: I don’t.
Ever had sex while drunk: Yes.
Do you regret any sexual incidents that occurred on your part: No.
Do you consider yourself sexually attractive: No.
Favourite sexual position: I have many.
Tell us about any of your personal beliefs regarding sex: I just feel you should only have sex with someone you love.. not just anyone who’s there.

[Your Love Life]
Are you in a relationship right now: No..
Describe your current, or most recent relationship: It was great, until I ruined it.
Are you, or have you ever been in love: Yes.
What's your sexual orientation: Straight.
Are you, or do you plan on getting married: Yeah, someday.
Do you believe in soul-mates: Yes.
Do you think long-distance love is possible: No.
Could you see yourself being unfaithful: No.
What do you notice about the opposite sex first: Hair.
Biggest turn-offs: Yucky teeth.
Taller or shorter than you: Taller.
Ever broken someone's heart: Yes.
Has someone ever broken yours: Everyday anymore.
Do/would you have children: I have a child.

[Your Bad Side]
Do you steal, or have you stolen: Yes [I have]
If so, was it from a store or a person you know: Yes.
Have you been intimate with someone else's significant other: No.
Do you take advantage of other peoples' kindness: No.
Have you lied to your parents: Yes.
Do you get jealous easily: YES. I fucking hate it.
Do you have a bad temper: Oh God, yes.
Have you ever made someone cry: Yes.
Ever physically hurt someone: Yes.
Do you consider yourself racist: No.
Must you always seek vengeance: HAhaha, yes.

[This or That]
Alcohol or Marijuana: Alcohol.
Coca-Cola or Pepsi: Coke.
A quiet evening at home or a wild night out: Depends on my mood.
Extreme intelligence or unbelievable beauty: Half and half.
A permanent, stable relationship or an insane sex life: A permanent, stable relationship.
Christmas without gifts, or Christmas without everything else: Without gifts
Rock or Rap: Rock.
The ability to fly or the ability to be invisible: Be invisible.
Hearing or seeing: Not sure.
Depression or anxiety: They’re both terrible.. so.. neither, please.
Immortality without the ability to die, or mortality: Mortality.
Death by freezing, or burning: Freezing.
Death by suffocation or being stabbed: Stabbed.
Lots of acquaintances or a few close friends: Few close friends.
To be a singer or an actor/actress: Actress
Eternal day or eternal night: Night.
X-Ray vision or psychic abilities: Psychic abilities.
Sweet or savory: Sweet.
To never sleep or to never eat: Never eat.
To eat as much as you want or to sleep as much as you want: Sleep as much as I want.
World domination or infinite knowledge of all things: Knowledge of all things.
Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera: Neither, thanks.
Bush or Kerry: Bush
To resort to cannibalism or to die: Die.

[The Last]
Person you talked to: Jim.
Person you argued with: Jim.
Person you hugged: Jim.
Person you kissed: Jim.
Person you texted: Chuck.
Person you had sex with: Jim
Phone call: Jim.
Thing you ate: Pepperoni Pizza.
Thing you drank: Orange Juice.
Time you showered: This afternoon.
Time you told someone you loved them: When I got off the phone with Jim about 3 hours ago..
Time someone said they loved you: Yesterday.
Time you laughed: Last night.
Time you vomited: This morning.
Paycheck: Thursday.
Time you had sex: Yesterday.
TV show you watched: Law and Order SVU.
Song you listened to: I don’t remember.
Movie you watched: The Truman Show.
Dream you had: Me running into a tree and dying.
Time you got drunk: Long time ago.
Party you went to: Long time ago.
Item of clothing you bought: Not sure.
Person you would sleep with: Jim.

[Have You Ever Been Called]
Bitch: Yes, all the time.
Bastard: Not that I know of.
Beautiful: Yes, by Jim
Talented: No.
A waste of space: Yes
Liar: All the time..
Geek: No.
Nerd: No.
Loser: Yes.
Peculiar: No.
Intelligent: Yes.
Skinny: Yeah.
Fat: Yeah.
Pretty: Yes.
Preppy: No.
Goth: No.
Emo: No.
Grunger: No.
Fiend: No?
Innovative: No.
Weirdo: No.
Stupid: Yep.
Retarded: Yes.
Annoying: Yes..
Freak: Yes..
Brat: Yes a long time ago.
Cute: Yes.
Interesting: Yep.
Boring: Yes.
Slut: Uh huh.
Whore: Yes.
Skank: Yes.
Asshole: Yeah.
Shitface: Don't think so.
Ugly: Yeah.
Disgusting: Yep.
Shithead: Don't think so.
Cock: No.
Tit: No.
Twat: No.

[Totally Random]
Tell us the first thing you'd do with a million dollars: Build a house for me, Jim and Gabby to live in right next to my Aunt and Uncle.
Why is the sky blue: I forget.. there is some logical reason.
Do you consider yourself to be romantic: Yes.
What's the best thing somebody has ever said about you: That I was the most beautiful thing in the world..
What do you think of P.E.T.A: I don't know what that is.
What do you think of South Park: Used to be funny, now it’s just old.
Do you like candles: Love them.
Do you think emo people are idiots: No.
Do you think goths are idiots: No.
Do you think people who take ridiculously long surveys are idiots: Haha.
Do you believe men and women are truly equal: Yeah.
Do you read books very much: Yes.
Do people consider you to be a bookworm: No.
Describe your mother: No thanks.
What's one thing you would change about your body: I wish I was skinny.
Would you kill one child to save the lives of 1000 children: Never..
What one thing would a person have to do to deserve death: Rape someone.
The most romantic thing somebody's ever done for you: Jim would send me flowers for no reason..
Do you use bittorrent: What's that?
What P2P programs do you use: I just play Jims.
Have you ever skydived: Nope.
List three things you want to do before you die: Be happy [with Jim], Make sure Gabby has a good life, and that’s it.. there is no 3rd thing.
The world ends and you can only save three people and yourself. Who would you save: Gabby. Jim, and I don’t know..
If you could kick anyone's ass, who would it be: TO MANY FUCKING PEOPLE.
If you could sleep with anyone in the world, who would it be: Just Jim.
Are you bored of this survey yet: Very much.
What is the meaning of life: there is none.

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xxinterrupted

:: 2005 28 October :: 1.56pm
:: Mood: depressed

I'm just more and more depressed everyday over Jim.

I went over his house for a while, when I got there it was around 2:20 [I stayed home from school yesterday and today] he was sleeping in his bed, so I just crawled in next to him.. I fell asleep for about an hour then woke him up and we talked. We got into an arguement, but as I got up to leave he pulled me back down, so I stayed. Then Jeff said someone was at the door for him, and Jim asked who it was.. Jeff hesitated and said it was Christian, so Jim went down, then came back up with Christain and Jess. I guess this little girl Krysta ran away from home and her parents called the cops, and they think they're going to search Jims and Brandons house because they hang out with her. So there was a big drama, Jess left so Jim, Christain and I went downstairs. Jess came back, we all sat in the kitchen for like an hour or so.. Jess left again, Jim and I got into a fight because he told me he hated me being there. I cried half the way home, then I called him and started screaming at him, and he told me to come back. So I turned around at Manns Lounge and went back. Christain was still there when I got back, but I was still crying so I just went up in Jims room to lay down. Then they both came up, Jim asked him to go in the other room, we talked for a few minutes.. blah blah blah. Anyways, I left after that. Came home, went to sleep.

I didn't go to school today either. I'm sick, I went to the doctors I just have a viral infection. I don't have to go to work tonight or tomorrow morning.

Jim and I are supposed to go out tomorrow night.. I can't wait. :)

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alastar

:: 2005 27 October :: 10.35pm

Something that should have been written a long time ago, and has now faded in clarity in the back of my mind from lack of use; atrophy.

Burning
and
Aching


-like a thousand snakes slithering, slipping, and sliding through my muscles, tasting me with serrated tongues.
-like a thousand beatles skittering, scratching, and slashing through my nerves, sticking me with lacerating teeth.

And yet the shovel strikes the pile once more, lifts an unbearable weight, and empties itself into the mouth of the dragon. Must keep feeding. Must keep the fire alive.


A thousand shovels pierce the piles of coal to the beating of wings and the rhythm of the hungry growls.

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alastar

:: 2005 27 October :: 10.25pm

Rough Love

I have some suggestions that you should follow:

[1.] Dam up those lakes, or just stop filling them.
[2.] Bandage those cuts, or just stop picking them.

Something is stuck in the gears and all of these mechanical injuries are adding up to nuts and bolts and cuts and bruises. (Note:Rhyme followed by Alliteration.) All you get in return are scars and callouses. Reminders and Memories; Etched into skin with claw or fist or maybe something that started as a kiss. (Tough love.)

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xxinterrupted

:: 2005 27 October :: 10.19am
:: Mood: crappy

Jim called me at 2 in the morning, saying that he was sorry. This time I said that it wasn't okay. He was like well, I just stopped smoking that's why I'm grouchy. I still didn't say it was okay. But we talked for a few minutes then I had to go because Gabby woke up screaming. Shes sick. Okay, well I guess I'm going over Jims later today.. I'll update later. <3

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xxinterrupted

:: 2005 26 October :: 9.52pm
:: Mood: confused

It started out as a great day.. Jim called me at 5:30 or so in the morning, and we talked for like an hour. Then I got ready for school, school was okay. I went to work right after school. I tried and tried to call Jim to make sure I could still come over his house. Jeff answered each time, and each time he wasn't there. (I got off work early) I even rented a movie at Giant Eagle for us to watch.. I ended up going with Kelly and Krysta to Krystas house until I got ahold of Jim. Alaina and Bill came, we were all hanging out and Jim calls. He tells me that he just started watching a movie over Brandons, to come over "later" so I told him that I couldn't because I had to be home at 10:30-11:00. We kinda argued, it was mostly him yelling at me and me trying to defend myself. I started crying and he hung up on me. I fucking cried in front of everyone for like 5 minutes. He always does this to me. Why do I even try anymore? It's like he does it on purpose to see how long I'll take it. I just don't understand, how can he make me cry so much all the time.. I think he likes to do it, maybe it makes him feel good. Why else would he blow me off all the time.

..why do I care so much.

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xxinterrupted

:: 2005 25 October :: 9.33am
:: Mood: busy

So today I woke up at 7:13. (I usually leave at 7:10!) SO I got up real fast, put clothes on, makeup, and brushed my teeth. I ran out the door and I noticed that it was STILL SNOWING!! So I was going up the hill and it was freezing. BLAH.

I feel and look like crap, it's hat day today, so I'm wearing Jim's hat.

Yesterday after school [the note being passed around about me, Jim and Jess.. lots of drama with that.] I went to Jims. We had the best time. We just talked, layed in his bed and talked, I looked up in his attic.. it's really scary up there. There is a table up there with a half empty Dr. Pepper can.. but no one ever goes up there. SO I got home around 6:00, then just chilled out went online for a bit, spent some time with Gab.

I have to leave early [2:00] to take Gab to her Dr. Apt in Washington. I think Jim is going to go with me. I'm scared to drive on bad roads!

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fallenfairy

:: 2005 25 October :: 12.43am

Under new management.
I love you Chuck.

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aerii

:: 2005 24 October :: 7.18pm



concussions make you sleepy.

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alastar

:: 2005 24 October :: 9.33pm


Defining these contraints;

like bars on cages
and
locks on doors
and
norms on society.

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fallenfairy

:: 2005 23 October :: 9.14pm

I like Chuck.

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xxinterrupted

:: 2005 23 October :: 8.13pm
:: Mood: cheerful

It was a great weekend.. starting with Friday.

8th period on Friday someone was like "Jena, you have to read this note." So I read it, and it's this note that was found on the ground about how this girl is totally in love with Jim. LMAO. Make me laugh! So everyone read it (before I got it) and everyone was laughing their asses off also. Friday night Becky and I went to a haunted house, it was okay, not as good as we had hoped.. but we did have fun. (love you BECKY!)

Saturday morning was PowderPuff practice, after that Randi, Becky and I stopped at McDonalds to get something to eat. I dropped Becky off at her house, then went to Jims. (We mostly stayed in his bed!) haha. I got there about noon, then left at 3:00 to go to work. After work I just went home and went to sleep.

Today was the PowderPuff game against the Juniors. WE KICKED THEIR ASSES! hahaha. 12-0. Seniors=undefeted. Hell yes. After the game me, Becky, Randi, Sam, Jason, Nick, and Zack went to eat at Kings. Then we decided not to eat there, left and went to Pizza Hut. Then we went to Wal*Mart, messed around then went home. I got home around 7:00.

Yeah, it was a great weekend!

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fallenfairy

:: 2005 23 October :: 1.28pm

So.

I'm beginning to think this place is a waste.

No one comments, besides Pete. A lot of the people on here are complete asses now. And no, I'm not trying to be all high and mighty here, yes, I admit, I'm probably an ass now too.

I'm leaving here. I think its time for me to end this chapter. I don't feel like I have any ties here anymore, so its over.

If anyone would like to use this journal, please inform me. But I reserve the right to ask for this journal back if needed.

Goodbye.

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s-m-i-l-e

:: 2005 22 October :: 10.49pm

these journal things are so crazy, i never use it anymore, but i still never get rid of it, you just cant, there are too many things i wrote about to just get rid of it, hmm so crazy

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aerii

:: 2005 22 October :: 9.36pm

allan is comfortably.

i only eat on the right side of my body
and its only 9 30 and a half.

allan is touching my butt. i will kill him

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