:: 2003 10 November :: 5.50 pm
:: Mood: happy/tired/sore

hmmm, last night i was almost certain today was goign to suck... but it was the total opposite, it was a great and cheerful day.. YAY :).. there was a lab do today and i ended up not passing it in but thats the onle thing that went wrong... im going to jeremies tommorrow to jam but Ms. Halverson gave me ALOT of HOMEWORK... lol.. i hate hw but shes cool...

i just tried doing some exercizing but for some reason i feel this sharp pain in my lower gut... its really weird.... hmm... hope it goes away soon...

i called alison and i told her how i felt about the whole thing and it felt good to get it off my chest...she said she understood and she didnt seem to sad.... im glad...

today was a good day :)

.:: From Behind My Eyes::.

:: 2003 9 November :: 1.15 am
:: Mood: tired.. MUCH!!!

MuSt SlEeP nOw...
::YAWNS::..lol.... im actually still online...im surprised... i havent been on this late since summer.... there is no one on my buddy list that doesnt have an away message up..lol... im going to bed after i finish this entry... ::yawns again::..

my little picture taking activity was a complete success... i got like 8 or 9 pics out of it that actually make me feel really really proud that im me... yay... lol... im not tryign to be conceited ( i hope i dont sound it), its only human to want to tell people "i made some pics of myself and im actually not going to be like 'they suck' becuase thier actually good for once"...lol...AND now of course i have the most strongest erge to show them to the world..but it would be really creepy for me to just email people pics or even put them in here... soo im goign to make a FTJ account as soon as i finish figureing out how to "crunch" my pics for FREE... well anyways, i hope everyone had a great and amazing day... or atleast a good day.. :)...

.:: From Behind My Eyes::.

:: 2003 8 November :: 9.04 pm
:: Mood: bored

"the boredness" ~Ash
Im wicked bored right now... and i want to stay online but there really isnt anyone on AIM right now...ive been wanting to get some pictures for my user icon on woohu so i think im goign to do that... and make a FTJ account... randy was kinda meen a couple days ago about that though... i dont know.. he was like "todd, on FTJ they only grade you on your picture soo dont be upset if you get a really low score..".. that didnt make me feel good... but im not sure but i think he ment that only people that show alot of skin and are slutty get good scores...im not sure though... oh well.. its all good... im not ugly, i know im not (atleast im 90% sure im ok looking..).. oh yeah.. and im going to have to do some more push-ups and sit-ups... im trying to get into shape...lol... its working pretty good actually... i look in the mirror and im like "hmmm, why hello there ;)"...lol...

.:: From Behind My Eyes::.

:: 2003 8 November :: 7.57 pm
:: Mood: tired/alittle sick

Never eat a little snack cake if it looks like it has sprinkles but it doesnt show it with sprinkles on the box... its not a good idea..
Last night was awsoume...we were suppossed to jam, but we didnt... but it was still fun... we (me, chris, and brandon) went to jeremys and then we all (me, chris, brandon, jeremy, and joey) went to the Escape Key for a couple hours... it was fun.. lmao we were drivign down the highway at like 8 with fuckin incubus cranked up all the way singing to it... it was awsoume.. i stopped at a light and this girl in the car next to us gave us the most funniest look.. lmao... we were like over powering the radio.. she probly coudl hear us loud and clear... anyways... and then we all went back to jeremys and jammed for like a half and hour until it was 11 and jeremys mom came up and yelled at us...lol... she was like "IF YOU WANTED TO DO THAT YOU SHOULD HAVE FUCKIN NOT LEFT AND FUCKING DONE IT EARLIER!!!!!!!".. lol..

Then me and brandon slept over at chris's... nope ashly, there was no gay touchy feely stuff....lmao... thats wicked funny... becuase even you know that if adam was there it could have been pretty gay.. jk jk... lol... chris, brandon, and i were like "little school girls", that seems to happen alot, especially when people are really tired...

that morning after sleeping over was kinda boring... but it was fun still... at about 12:30 me, chris, and brandon went back to the Escape Key...we played for about another hour or so... then we went to Foodies and chris cashed in a bunch ($18 worth) of coins... lol.. then we went and got pizza (not at Foodies) at some pizza place down the street... then we went to jeremys... we tried jammign but it was too damn cold...

Im feeling kinda sick to my stomach... i think it was the christmas tree snack cake thingy i just ate... it tasted alittle funny..it was all colorful, but it was just plain white on the box.. POISON!!! GAH!!! jk.. but i do think that was it...

Theres an aclypse (or is it "eclypse") going on as i type this.. its not a SOLAR aclypse... theres just a brownish orange shadow going over the moon...its pretty... :).. ::sigh::... yay..

lmao... i just saw "8 Crazy Nights".. i was kinda disappointed with the large amount of singing.. but it was funny...lol...

.:: From Behind My Eyes::.

:: 2003 7 November :: 4.05 pm

blah.....
Today was ok.. well actually i lied, today sucked balls..... it was the most boring day ever and i felt depressed for most of it (and i still do).. i really didnt feel depressed over anything specific, just the usual stuff... during the end of last block i wanted to cry... i just stood infront of that mirror in the hallway watching my eyes get all red and puffy.... ::sigh::

but my day was ok in the morning i guess... i shouldnt just forget the good times becuase of the sad ones.... in CP CHEM it was wicked AWSOUME!!! like.. Mr. Keeten put a couple cups of this really flammable liquid into a 2 liter coke bottle and shook it up... then he set the bottle on its side and opens up the cap, and with a big stick with a lit match on the end he made the shit go off just by putting the fire infront of it.. and it was like BOOOM!!!!!! and a huge flame came out and the bottle flew across the room right into the wall (the bottle was originally on a stool on the oppisite end of the class)..and it left a trail of scattered flames on the ground... it was wicked awsoume... that flame was huge...and then he did it again... i wish i had a camera.... he says that were going to do it again in the near future except with alot more liquid and a bigger bottle... i was like "SWEET!!!"

im home right now... and im going to be going to jam soon i guess.... i just had to get online becuase im addicted to AIM.... i thought it might make me feel better, and i wanted to change my journal colors but i dont feel like it right now.... im sure ill feel better by tommorrow, it was just one of those days that everything gets to you...

2 .::Whispers To Me::. | .:: From Behind My Eyes::.

:: 2003 6 November :: 4.28 pm
:: Mood: bored

Today was really reallyl really BOREING... GAH!... but i started my morning off with 2 jelly dohnuts so it was alittle interseting... i was actually awake :)... hmmmmm what to talk about........

English and CP Chem flew by.. In english we were supposed to be taking notes silently out of the book and half the class was haveing a huge debate about "Finding Nemo" and if the 2 fishes in the end were in love or not.... lmao.... i never even seen that movie... to be 100% truthfully i want to see it.. lmao... i like Toy Story and stuff.. just the innocent cute comedy is kina refreshing from the average kind..... anyways, enough about that :P...

I think Sarah Porey ( i dont know how to spell it) has the same exact car as me... lmao... i like saw her car yesterday and i was like "wow, thats my car almost, except grey".. and it was really funny becuase when i was driving out of the parking lot today she like drove by in it and we looked at eachother and were like "nice car ::gangsta nod:: (dont ask me what that is but thats what i call it)" as we passed... lol...

My violin lessons went pretty shitty.. i didnt practive at all... ill have to try harder to practice becuase i shouldnt have to feel like shit every thursday over violin...

i ran into ashly and chris alot today, it was kinda funny... but at the same time i was like "hmmmm, maybe im a stalker ::evil laugh::... nah"... :P

I kinda feel sad for Chris and Randy.. they used to be liek best friends and today in the hall i was walkign with chris and randy passed.... and they hardlly even looked at eachother... randy just said "hi todd" and neither of them said "hi" to eachother...sad, very sad indeed...

I AM REALLY BORED sooo i "BORROWED" a survey from ashly.. :)


You're not really hateful, no, you'd hate much, you
just...dislike. You're cool, I guess.


How Hateful Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

.:: From Behind My Eyes::.

:: 2003 5 November :: 6.38 pm

You're Most Like The Season Autumn ...

You're warm, and the most approachable. You have
that gentle prescence about you. People can
relate to you, and find you easy company.
However it's likely you've been hurt in the
past and it has left you scarred so things can
become rather chilly with you at times. Being
the third Season in, you're mature, trustworthy
and loyal to your friends but prone to
depression and negative thinking.

Well done... You're the shy and sensitive season :)


?? Which Season Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

Falls my favorite season.. im actually glad i got it..... ::sigh::.. its just soo relaxing, all the leaves and the warm breeze.... and not to mention the rain... i luv water..... especially if its with someone special..... water is just plain great..

.:: From Behind My Eyes::.

:: 2003 5 November :: 5.56 pm
:: Mood: happy

my last entry was depressed... i thought ashly wasnt going to be online anymore, that woudl have sucked.. but everythigns better now....

I had this really weird dream, it was one of those dreams where you see things that you wouldnt think possble... it was real enough that i almost was able to gain from it... i dreamed that i had written some lyrics awhile back and i was reading them and looking back on them... i read all of the lyrics word for word (in the dream) and they were really good and i didnt reconize them at all... i wish i was able to write them down somehow.... maybe i could have used them..

It was kinda like my dream from a week ago where i dreamed about listening to "Coheed and Cambria".. i can still remember how original and cool they sounded in my dream... then i listened to them for real (when i was awake) and i didnt liek them as much as when i listened them in my dream.... but of coarse in my dream they were called "Cambria and Coheed" becuase in dreams things are often reversed....lmao... i know this becuase in my dreem "Cambria and Coheed" was the only thign that came up with results on Kazaa...lol... it was fucked up..

.:: From Behind My Eyes::.

:: 2003 5 November :: 4.08 pm

today was ok... it wasnt the best day of my life, but it wasnt bad either... it was really boring though.... in english we had a big test and i didnt study but i think i bull-shitted my way through it pretty well... and then in chem we had a gay lab... i hate labs.... especially when everyone in my group is soo annoying... and then i had my lunches...lol...their always good... lunch A was really borign though, and then lunch B was boring too, actually all of today was fucking boring... 4th block especially becuase i cant even use the stupid computers in there now.. i just walk up and down the halls and when i see someone i like to talk to i like get all happy and hyper and annoy them, ask ashly about it... wow... she was like "todd, CALM DOWN!!!..lol"... i think i got her annoyed :/.. i didnt say sorry though. i caught myself, but im thinking maybe thats one of the times i should say sorry and now i feel really bad...

sorry ashly, especially if i was one of the people that annoyed you to the point of changing your sn...

blah, its kinda sad... but i actually dont feel like talkign on AIM tonight...ill probly leave the comp running so i can download shit off kazaa though i guess.... talk to all of you guys (and gals) later........

.:: From Behind My Eyes::.

:: 2003 3 November :: 5.11 pm

hand holding - you like to be in constant physical
contact with your special someone but you don't
want to take things too quickly.


What Sign of Affection Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

HA!.. i knew it.... i just knew it... its sooooo true..

.:: From Behind My Eyes::.

:: 2003 3 November :: 4.37 pm
:: Mood: happy

today was a good day (for me)... i cant say the same for other people... but im only going ot say one thing about it... IM STAYING NEUTRAL....lmao...

okie doke, moving on.. today started of with me driving to school... i had to get gas but when i was going for the pump some guy cut me off... lmao.. but it was all good and he apologized....and i was like "its ok, dont worry about it".. and then i got to school and in english i talked to Josh T alot.. we talked about jeffs weirdness.... and then i got to CHEM.... and somehow i got myself into a convo about penis peircings with Katie ( i dont know her last name)... it was wicked funny... and when i was leaving school for lunch ( i was in a big hurry) Dan started like talkign to me as i was try to leave... lmao... he was like "hey todd"... and im like "hey dan ::starts runnign away for the door::.." and he was like "TODD WHY ARE YOU RUNNING!!!"... it was wicked funny... and then soem bad stuff happened, but all im goign to say is that im stayign NEUTRAL...lmao.. and then i went to all the other lunches...and then during 4th block i went to josh savoys house with randy.. it was better then sitting around doing nothing...

afteer school was good to.... except i almost got t/boned by a pick-up truck when i was leving the school parkign lot... the guy (brian huntoon) stopped less then a foot from my side window.. hes sooo stupid... he was going like 30 in a parking lot and not paying attention, and I HAD THE RIGHT OF WAY!!!.. lmao.. and then violin lessons went good..

and that was my day.. yay... :)

.:: From Behind My Eyes::.

:: 2003 1 November :: 9.45 pm
:: Mood: tired (alot)

i had SATs this morning... i got up at 6:30... and i think i did ok.... chris said he had SATs too but i didnt see him...maybe he didnt take them at Concord...

I didnt really do anythign today... i colored... i luv art... but thats like all i did.. and i played guitar.... im really startign to get pissed at violin... like... i want to learn it sooo bad but i dont have time.... i have sooo much shit going on anhd everyday im like "god damn it... i didnt practice"... and my teacher always gets pissed at me..... like there sooo much stuff that comes before it like for example: AIM, drawing/art , guitar, music, woohu, hw, and thw whole band thing..... and hopefully ill be able to put a gf on that list some day... ::sigh::... i just dont have enough time for violin..

I wish i had more privacy in my own home... i often think of how much stuff i could get done if my parens werent always yelling at me and looking over my shoulder.... like... an example for today would be that i want to make a FTJ account but i want a better picture...and theyed flip and be like "gah!!! DONT PUT YOUR IMAGE ON THE INTERNET!! PEOPLE WILL COME AND KILL US!".. their soo stupid.. and i have to keep it secret that i have fuckin fishnets... or else theyed get all sad....their just FISHNETS!...god... hiding stuff like that gets sooo tiring... their way to over protective to the point of where i have to hide who i am... they dotn know me and im their own son....

tommorrow morning i was suppossed to go to church with adam and josh... but im sooo tired... and id have to get up at like 6:30... but me and josh are going to a youth group on tuesday... its going to be fun.... josh is soo wise and spiritually alive... i want to feel that way....and im sure one day i will....

it sucks really bad to be jeremy right now... its soo sad... his mom is a wicked bitch too... she kicked him out of his room and gave it to riley... and ws like "you will never have your own room until you move out".... and she took away everythign in his room to (the computer)... blah... that sucks...

well.... i guess tommorrow im going o go jam... or atleast attempt to jam.. i dont think anyone is in the mood but it has to be done...

.:: From Behind My Eyes::.