losrnancr
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2023 11 December :: 11.12pm
what a fucking year.
1 had an epiphany |
do tell
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losrnancr
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2023 17 July :: 12.16pm
Hi, woohu.
Still here, just private.
do tell
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oceanchild
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2011 8 December :: 8.49am
:: Mood: giddy
Guess who has two thumbs and got kissed last night?
...THIS GIRL.
2 had an epiphany |
do tell
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oceanchild
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2011 21 November :: 12.04am
My date with Justin was tonight, and it was fantastic. We went to an arcade and played hella fun games. We talked about Star Trek and Skyrim and reading. He picked me up, bought me dinner, and got me an Angry Birds stuffed toy with the tickets we won from the arcade games. When the night was over he walked me back to my door and gave me a hug.
I sent him a text message after he left to thank him again for the date and to say I was looking forward to the next one. He wrote back, "Me too! I'll be in touch. :)"
I'm trying to keep a level head and avoid the rebound trap, but I'm feeling giddy butterflies. I think I might really like him.
do tell
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oceanchild
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2011 13 November :: 5.44pm
a new chapter
I've met someone.
His name is Justin...my friend Madison has been busily playing matchmmaker behind the scenes and finally introduced us at a video game party on Friday night. It went well, and he called today to ask if he could take me out next weekend. To an arcade. Home run, dude.
I'm...excited! Scared, and wondering if it's a mistake, and still so conflicted on Nathan's account, and afraid of fucking things up...but excited. It's been a long time since I felt butterflies, and I'm going to see where this goes.
1 had an epiphany |
do tell
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oceanchild
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2011 10 November :: 12.47pm
Nathan wrote me back last night to say that while he was willing to talk, he didn't want to be friends.
At first I was angry, oh so angry. But that burned off overnight, and today I'm just in a slump. I suppose I have to accept that I'm just not as important to him as I wish I were--maybe I never was. I feel like this is just one more situation in which he's running away rather than facing something difficult. When it counted, he was never really willing to take the initiative and fight for me. It's a painful realization and it makes me feel pretty worthless.
I don't know how to talk to him without being his friend. We know each other too well to just be acquaintances. And so I wrote him back to say, in essence, "Well, ball's in your court, then; have a nice life."
And now...I don't know where to go from here. I feel like three months ago I lost my boyfriend, and yesterday night I lost my best friend too. I'm getting progressively more alone as the months go by. And my horoscope for today read something like "The more connections you make, the harder it is to hang onto the meaningful ones. Your circle of friends may have expanded, but your circle of close friends may have decreased."
Thanks a lot, downer fortune.
5 had an epiphany |
do tell
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oceanchild
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2011 9 November :: 8.43am
Today is the day. Three months have passed, and the silence is over. I just sent Nathan an e-mail.
do tell
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