& all I want & all I need;

I've been really struggling lately, battling my inner demons.
I have always had difficulties fitting in, and even as an adult, that is no exception.
Lately I've been really struggling with my self perception, identity and self worth. I've never had good self perception or worth, my self esteem has never been above par and tends to hover on the non existent line.
I try really hard, to stay active, to create peace, to savor the little things. But lately, something is missing. And it's really causing me to criticize my wants, needs, aspirations, etc. for awhile I thought I was on a good path to figuring out more about those aspects but currently and often I just feel empty.
Unworthy, is a term that frequents my negative self talk, among other things.
I hope that one day it isn't so hard anymore. Because I'm really trying.

dismemberment.