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2004 8 August :: 6.38pm
:: Mood: sad/happy/sad
My trip
Thank you Sean for the last update!
So Colorado was so much fun. I was so worried about it sucking and it turned out great. Mostly because I enjoyed the company around me. Everyone was nice and fun. I got along with everyone. We went to a Rockies game, Putt Putt golfed, saw The Village, went to the Rocky Mountains, Drum Corp, tons of movies and late nights goofing around...so on and so forth. I wish I could have stayed longer.
But then there would be no Sean and that wouldnt be a good thing.
Tonight I took my parents out to eat. I ate tons.
10 days until Warped Tour!
I got a letter
BYE
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2004 2 August :: 2.52am
:: Mood: chipper
:: Music: Cannibal Corpse - Skull Full of Maggots
Colorado
Howdy ya'll!!! I'm in Colorado right now so i obviously couldn't update, but that doesn't matter right now.
The trip's been fun so far, i'm missing Sean like crazy though, but we talk every night to ease the pain. Today i went to a Rockies baseball game, even though i don't like baseball. Then we went putt-putt golfing, which i still have to do with Sean when i get home, and lot of other fun shit, yadda yadda yadda.
I'll update you later, not that you care.
I promise, P-R-O-M-I-S-E, that i will never ever leave Sean again without taking him with me. I love you Sean!
Everyone else can die :)
BYE
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2004 29 July :: 11.12am
:: Mood: blank
:: Music: Sugarcult- Saying goodbye
How fitting
So yesturday I went to the gym. I did 60 MINUTES OF CARDIO AND SWEAT LIKE NEVER BEFORE. I also did my BMI and lost 1% body fat and 2 inches since I started. Im cool with that. So go me.
Then I went to work and folded 90 shirts that we are selling. I also recieved my Big Dip hoodie. How ruley. That means I can bring it to Colorado with me tomorrow. I got out of work early since it was slow and I went to Seans. We played darts and I won two out of three. We went for a walk and then I went home.
Today I woke up at 7. Laid around until 7:30. And went to the gym at 8:30 . We only stayed for like an hour because Amy had to work day. Im still glad we went.
So since I got home I have washed my sheets...twice. Some how the soap cap got on them so I had to wash them a second time. Way to go loser. I finished packing my clothes and plane bag. Now Im going to clean my room a bit, pluck eyebrows, nailpolish my my fingers and toe and then take a shower. Then around 2:30 my mom is taking me to the bank to get cash dawg. Then Sean time...the last time for 10 days :( So thats no fun. Then I work 7 to 11. I have to wake up around 4 tomorrow and I dont think I'll be sleeping much tonight. Oh well.
Well, I'll miss...some...of you
See you in 10 days!!!!
BYE
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2004 28 July :: 10.28am
:: Mood: ehh
:: Music: My Chemical Romance- Drowning Lessons
Im leaving in two days
So yesturday I worked day and had to do a bunch of day stuff. It was wicked rainy so it was wicked slow. It was cool. So then Sean met me up there and we went to my humble home. We organized my cd's I needed for the trip. That took awhile. Then I packed. My dad brought him home nice and early. I watched TV for once in my life and that was that.
Here I am...Im going to the gym in 20 minutes. I should be getting my body fat content redone today to see if I improved at all. Who knows. Then I have work 3 to 9:30.
Im leaving for Colorado in two days....plane all by myself. I get there and will be with complete strangers. This is an adventure I'll tell ya.
BYE
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2004 24 July :: 10.55pm
:: Mood: Better
:: Music: Im actually listening to this?
Pocket full of posies
Yestuday was dull and I choose not to remember it. I did go bowling in the end which was fun.
Today started off really crappy. You know, waking up at 7 in the morning to birds, vacumes and slamming doors. It just isnt fair to live in this house. It got better when Sean came over and we baught Mario Golf. Then it got bad again with a bad driving experience. I admit it was my fault but geeze mom, you make me so goddamn nervous to the point where I cant concentrate. I think I made that obvious. So that ruined about an hour and a half. Then I was made happy again. We have 5 birds now. Its a big baby named Cozmo. Whatever I guess. Sean and I got Icecream from my place of employment and then hung out and talked.
Tommorrow consists of getting up early to go to the gym. BFC checkup...scary. Then my mom, dad, Sean and I are going to my aunts for a cookout. It will be fun.
well...yeah
ok
BYE
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2004 22 July :: 11.46am
:: Mood: Whiney
:: Music: Zakk Wylde- Between Heaven and Hell :)
Fatty
So yesturday I worked 11:30 - 4:30. Lisa met me there and we went to my house where we awaited the arrival of my mom. So she got there and I drove to Club Tundra where there was a show. Sean and I played darts most of the time. I even won a few times. We played pool too. Lisa and I took some gas station trips while counting down the hours before we could leave. Then it ended up not being such a bad night. Robyn and Heather were there...I love them because they are awEsome. The annoying people didnt even piss me off so it was cool.
Lisa came back to my house and we went to the park where we were going to go swing but it looked scary and unsafe so we didnt. This morning she left and Im here with my mom who had a "headache" and stayed home from work. If youre going to stay home and fake sick atleast act sick. And if youre staying home just because you didnt want to go...then say it.
We might go to the mall. I need some clothes and such for Colorado. Im leaving in 8 days. Im kind of scared. Oh well...it'll be fun.
When I get home from that (on the 8th of August) I have another 9 days before its Warped Tour time. How exciting. Its going to rule! Im going to miss the crap out of Sean though. I hope that doesnt effect me on my adventures.
Well enough is enough.
BYE
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2004 21 July :: 12.55am
:: Mood: cheerful
Yes, cheerful...as in full of cheer
Today went well. Work was really busy and some people are very stupid and should take a look into suicide. Thats sooo besides the point though because I had a good day. After work Luke, John and some people I didnt know began to walk. So a kid with a bike asked me to hold his bike while ke skipped Luke and I took this opportunity and rode to Taco Bell. We went through the drivethrough and they acctually gave us food. It was awEsome. So then I went home and talked to my Love. I have gotten his cold and it really sucks ass.
Well I have to get up and go to work tomorrow. Then meet up with Lisa...then go to the show...then go home.
BYE
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2004 20 July :: 1.58pm
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: Matchbook Romance- Save Yourself
uhh yup
I suck at updating now adays. I dont really care though. I dont get much motivation.
Today has been good so far. Sean came over and Lauren and Jay scared the crap out of me. Then Sean and I went on an adventure to find somewhere to eat breakfast. We tried oscars which stops serving breakfast at 11. Then we went to Denny's which was closed for repairs. Then finally we went to the church diner where we had a lovely breakfast. Sean ate too much and drank something like 3 or 4 glasses of milk and almost got sick. He now is on his way home.
Im planless until I have to go to work at 4:30. I should probably take a shower since I havent done so yet.
So uhh
BYE
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2004 17 July :: 11.43pm
:: Music: Blink 182
...The words rot and fall away...
Whatever
This day was a lonely one. It was up and down but the bad outweighed the good.
I woke up and Sean called to say goodbye and promise one more time he'd be good while at his Slayer concert. I was in a good mood and then I walked downstairs into hell. My mom ended up screaming and swearing while slamming a door in my face nearly missing it. Sometimes I wish she'd go that extra step. So that was that....it ruined my day. Then I call Lauren and Lisa who were at a car wash. They said they'd hang out with me afterwards. They ended up and the mall which was supposed to be a 5 minute trip. It lasted for over an hour which made me feel more lonely and unwanted. Lisa ended up coming over for a bit and we ate Velveeta and she taught me how to 3 point turn. I went to work and Robyn made me feel somewhat better. Shes going to a show on Wednesday for CSA that Sean is also in so we are going to meet up which will be fun. Work was ok. Then I started worrying and then I got sick. My belly is all gay. I helped Mr. Stenzel with money and Jess drove me home. Here I am.
BYE
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2004 16 July :: 10.48pm
:: Mood: hateful
:: Music: Max Creek
Lets all say it together....SCREW LIFE
Observations:
1) notebook astray on futon
2) popcorn bag crushed on floor a foot away from the garbage
3) paper towel sitting on desk
4) 1/4 drank water bottle sitting on floor
5) tissue thrown on top of futon
I just didnt want to forget the things I walk into in this room. Could you imagine what would happen to me if I did something like that. And we had a "Family" Talk ...this was supposed to be settled. Oh yeah, thats right, only Karlene should follow through with the rules. I mean, we are living in Deeisalwaysright World. Damn, how'd I forget?
So...today had the potential to be such a good day but then Satan stopped by and said hello.
I went to the gym with Amy and Lindsay this morning. Then we picked up Sean. Sean and I went out to lunch. We went to the park and hung out for a bit. Thanks for finally telling me! So then we came back to my house and it went to shit. My mom can be a horrible person and she just wanted to prove that theory true. Sean went to karate and I slept and cried. I woke up and she started again and I cried. I went for a walk to the park where I swang alone. Then I was walking to meet Sean and I saw Hillary, Hill's mom, Jay, Ciara and Lawson. Hillary took one look at me and gave me a hug where I began to sob on her shoulder. Thanks for the Airhead and hug Hill, you've got exallent timing. So Sean got me Gillatos with my money he forgot to give back which made me feel better. We talked and then he went home. I went home and talked to my brother for awhile and he gave me cds. Thanks to him too.
So here I am. What will I do tomorrow. I dont even care.
BYE
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2004 15 July :: 12.17pm
:: Mood: blank
:: Music: crickets
I havent written in forever...
...and Im still not in the mood to!
Hmm my week...it was and is fullfilling. I dont feel like going backwards so I'll start with today.
I woke up to the phone ringing and it was Lauren. She can go to Warped Tour so we're all wicked excited. P-DAY at the tour. Its going to rule. Then I decided to call Lisa and we are going puttputt golfing today. Its going to be fun...I love putt putt. Then Sean is coming over around 3:30 and we are going to get crickets for Tim.
No work today or tomorrow. We are getting Big Dip hoodies and we are going to start selling shirts. How awEsome. I got a lime green shirt.
What else...nope not going there.
Yep thats it.
BYE
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2004 11 July :: 10.34am
:: Mood: moody
:: Music: Armor for Sleep- Pointless Forever
Yesturday
Yesturday I woke up at 8 with no power because a squirrel hit the transmitter. So Lauren and I went to the gym at 9. We got all sweaty and I came home. Craig picked me up at 11 and we went to Seans camp. It was a fun ride up. We got there safely. I learned that I suck at jarts...I really could use some practice. They cut down this huge tree. Sean and his dad set off fireworks. Then I almost fell asleep. It was a fun day/night and I didnt get ignored like I thought I would. We left around 12. The car ride home was good. And then I went to sleep!
Here I am and I really have to get offline and in the shower because Im going to the gym with Amy. Then I have to go to work. Then I might stop by at Nicks grad party.
I have a good work schedule this week.
M 11-4:30
T 3-9:30
W 4:30-CL
Th NO WORK
F NO WORK
S 6-CL
Sn NO WORK
Some free time for a change!
BYE
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2004 9 July :: 11.54pm
:: Mood: alone
:: Music: coheed and cambria
Out of the loop
Today was ok.
I did absolutely nothing all day besides burn cd's. Then I went to work. I got back massages and we had fun. Then I went with Hillary, Nick and Jay to Allens house where we all hung out.
I wish I saw them more. And Bethany. I miss having and hanging out with friends.
Tomorrow morning at 8 Im taking Lauren to the gym with me. It'll be fun.
Then Craig is driving me up to Seans camp for the 4th of July party on the 10th. I dont know how itll go. I cant tell if I will want to be there truthfully. Ehh, we'll find out.
BYE
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2004 8 July :: 11.40pm
:: Mood: ehh...borderline
:: Music: Smashing Pumpkins - Drown
I love this song
So...today was fullfilling.Lauren, Lisa and I went out to breakfast, went to Zummiez, then Home Depot. We dropped Lauren off and Lisa and I went to Bridgeport and Dewitt and East Syracuse for no reason other than we could. It started pouring and we got soaked getting gas. Then I went home and took a nap. Sean woke me up after I napped around 3. I gave him his birthday presents including his lizard that he randomly named Tim. We went and got crickets and then went to his house. His grandmas and other family members came over.
Now I dont feel too great. Can we say bi-polar? Its okay...I sometimes have a reason. Haha.
So I want to go to the gym and I dont think I can tomorrow and I might be able to Saturday morning. And hopefully Sunday.
In the last hour a lot of things have pissed me off about people. I hate ignorance. I hate immaturity. I hate revenge and showing off. Why do people need to say things to feel better about themselves...what does lying or being an asshole do for your self confidence? You know you're going to fall at some point, realize you're one huge lie and want to die for ever being that way.
Im just rambling. Oh well.
Well Im in a bad mood but I had a really good day. So it all evens out.
Happy Birthday Seany. <3
BYE
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2004 7 July :: 11.41pm
:: Mood: good
:: Music: feeder- just the way im feeling
Why am I in a good mood
What did I do today?
Ahh yes, I woke up and went to the pet store and got Seans birthday lizard deal all straightened out. Then I went home and hung out with Jake for a little while. It was good to see him again. Then Sean and I went to applebees for lunch. We went to the petstore again and then to work. It started pouring and it was fun. So then I did the whole work thing. It wasnt really fun until about 10. Well Lauren and Lisa stopped by and they went and brought me subway because they rule! So I learned how to close up on the register. That was about that.
So Seans lizard is so awEsome and I want to keep it. But I made him promise that I have full lizard privilages whenever I want.
Tomorrow Im going out to breakfest with Lauren and Lisa since Lisa got her lisence. Then I have to check out the mall. Then maybe a workout? Then its Seans b-day so we are going to do something or other.
thats it
BYE
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