To be, or not to be,--that is the question:-- Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune Or to take arms against a sea of troubles, And by opposing end them?--To die,--to sleep,-- No more; and by a sleep to say we end The heartache, and the thousand natural shocks That flesh is heir to,--'tis a consummation Devoutly to be wish'd. To die,--to sleep;-- To sleep! perchance to dream:--ay, there's the rub; For in that sleep of death what dreams may come, When we have shuffled off this mortal coil, Must give us pause: there's the respect That makes calamity of so long life; For who would bear the whips and scorns of time, The oppressor's wrong, the proud man's contumely, The pangs of despis'd love, the law's delay, The insolence of office, and the spurns That patient merit of the unworthy takes, When he himself might his quietus make With a bare bodkin? who would these fardels bear, To grunt and sweat under a weary life, But that the dread of something after death,-- The undiscover'd country, from whose bourn No traveller returns,--puzzles the will, And makes us rather bear those ills we have Than fly to others that we know not of? Thus conscience does make cowards of us all; And thus the native hue of resolution Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought; And enterprises of great pith and moment, With this regard, their currents turn awry, And lose the name of action.--Soft you now! The fair Ophelia!--Nymph, in thy orisons Be all my sins remember'd."

 

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:: 2004 6 July :: 6.23 pm

FIRSTS
First best friend: Katie Strandberg
First time away from home: New York
First job: Janitorial for St. Michaels Church

First screen name: SohGin144
First self-purchased album: Weird Al - Dare to be Stupid
First funeral: grandpa's
First pets: Cat, Terry
First piercing/tattoo: none
First play/musical/performance: No Greater Love

LASTS
Last kiss: Jessica
Last hug: Missa
Last Break-up: Jessica
Last good cry: three weeks ago
Last phone call: Jake
Last cd played: FatMix - Album 6/24/04
Last item bought: food at McDonalds
Last disappointment: Katie didn't get the job
Last word spoken: blah
Last time wanting to die: Last week, involving a girl
Last time in love: Randi
Last chair sat in: Comp Chair

CURRENTS
current clothes: Shorts and Bon Games Shirt
current mood: thoughtful
current music: Kingdom Hearts background music
current hair: long
current annoyance: my left foot
current smell: carpet
current thing I should be doing: cleaning my room


[name]: Scott
[people call me]: Fatman
[in the morning I am]: sleeping
[i day dream about]: pie
[tall or short]: fat
[born]: July 22
[school]: MCC
[sibs]: 1 sis, katie
[right or lefty]: Right


h a v e y o u e v e r
[been in love]: yup
[lied]: yeah
[given someone a bath]: nope
[smoked]: once
[bungee jumped]: nope
[broken the law]: Me? Nope. But some kind of Fat Angel sure did.
[skinny dipped]: hell no
[cried to get out of trouble]: nope
[fallen for the wrong girl/guy]: maybe
[cut your own hair]: I don't like to cut my hair
[been mean]: only to stupid polish fat wannabe managers at Dominos
[been sarcastic]: yup!
[fought with parents]: Yup, learned a few tricks, too
[skipped school ]: yup
[had an imaginary friend]: no
[hooked up w/ a friend]: As in bf/gf? Yup
[cried during a flick]: The exploding dead baby heads in Van Helsing made me cry tears of laughter. I nearly drowned...


w i t h t h e o p p o s i t e s e x
[what do u notice first?]: eyes
[turn off-looks]: uber piercings
[turn off-personality]: stupid
[hair length]: kinda long
[best height]: my height or shorter
[best weight]: my weight or less
[best article of clothing]: belt
[last called]: Missa
[last emailed]: Jami
[last mailed letter to]: Randi
[makes you laugh the most?]: Missa
[makes you smile]: Randi
[easier to talk to: boys or girls ?]: girls probably
[who do you cry with]: girls

w o r d a s s o c i a t i o n

[red]: meat
[cow]: moo
[grass]: comfy

[blue]: jello
[mirror]: reflection
[cracker]: food
[zine]: bean
[aol]: SATAN
[jelly]: nummy

t h i s o r t h a t
[day/night]: night
[summer/winter]: summer!
[lace/satin]: satin
[tape/cd]: CD
[lust/love]: love
[on phone/in person]: in person
[gold/silver]: silver
[scary/happy movies]: scary, those tend to be hysterical

f a v o r i t e


[color]: silver
[Holiday]: 6/15
[shampoo]: VO5
[furniture]: Lay - Z - Boy
[emotion]: elation
[pepsi or coke]: pepsi
[fast food]: taco bell
[animal]: kitty
[sport]: soccer
[cartoon character]: Garfield
[language]: english
[weekend activity]: friends
[roller coaster]: never been
[store]: Max Ten

m o r e
[could you live without the computer?]: maybe
[how many peeps are on your buddylist?]: 8
[like watching sunrises or sunsets]: sunset
[what hurts the most, physical or emotional pain?]: emotional
[trust others way too easily?]: used to
[is cheerleading a sport?]: no
[houses lived in]: 2
[schools gone to]: St. Mikes, MCC
[bedroom carpet]: wood
[last film seen in theatre]: Chronicles of Riddick

Wish to be Enlightened?


:: 2004 28 June :: 12.37 am

You may call me Mr. Ibbles!

2 Said Yes | Wish to be Enlightened?


:: 2004 8 June :: 9.30 pm

Forgive me, for in my rant I forgot to include some people:
Andrew, Ashley, Miller, Greg, Matt, Katie, Natalie, Abby, Zach...

...Hell, thanks to everyone who took the time to talk to me, no matter if it was even hello, or goodbye. You all had an impact on my live.

Wish to be Enlightened?


:: 2004 8 June :: 9.19 pm

I graduated from Muskegon Catholic Central at 6:00 PM on June 6, 2004. I recieved my diploma from Fr. Mark Bauer and got a personal congratulations from Mr. Powers. I recieved $3800 in scholarships, and plan to go to Muskegon Community College in the fall. What I am to study I do not yet know. All I have to ask is...


now what?

For the past fourteen years, my life has been planned out by other people. This year marks a new beginning. Everything will change, that which has not already changed.


now what?

I am to be seperated from those I've grown to appreciate, admire, and maybe even love. Will we ever meet again? Perhaps, perhaps not. But what will happen if I never get to say goodbye to those people I didn't get a chance to congratulate or give a fond farewell to? Those whose consistancy told me that tomorrow will come, told me to live for today, to live for myself. Justin, Jill, Andrea, Pat, Mike, Kenesha. Where would I be without you guys? I take this opportuinity, perhaps my last opportuinity, to say thank you.

Wish to be Enlightened?


:: 2004 26 May :: 9.58 pm

Choose a band/artist and answer only in song TITLES by that band: Cursive
Are you male or female: A Gentleman Caller
Describe yourself: Staying Alive
How do some people feel about you: Herald! Frankenstein
How do you feel about yourself: The Recluse
Describe your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend: Art Is Hard
Describe where you want to be: Sierra
Describe what you want to be: The Ugly Organist
Describe how you live: Some Red Handed Sleight of Hand
Describe how you love: Driftwood: A Fairy Tale
Share a few words of wisdom: Butcher the Song

1 Said Yes | Wish to be Enlightened?


:: 2004 19 May :: 11.21 pm

I hate GVSU. If you plan on going there, either don't tell be or don't go. They are guilty of dickery in the first degree.

In other news:

I did my first job shadow for mayfest at Community. That was fun. I got to meet the hyperactive vegitarian Liz for the first time. She's cool, and a good dancer to boot.

My car may yet survive, I just need to get ym hands on some F4 tape. That's the stuff they use to put airplanes back together with. Watch out leaks!

Still single here, so Mikey, STFU about being "just friends". Shit, I don't even have that. All the girls I'm interested in are unavailable. I don't know where BJ is, Kassy lives in Arkansas now, with her Fiancee, Randi is married and lives in Brekenridge, and Jessa doesn't seem interested. Even the girls I'm not interested in are taken. Tonna's married, Patty's engaged, Lindsay is kinda engaged to Jake, Samera is engaged, Melissa disappeared, and Katie's a lesbian! GO ME!

...wait...poop...

Anyway, not everthing sucks. Tim's in town until the 24th, and that's cool.

Only 3.5 weeks until I have the house to myself for 3 entire weeks! w00t!

Peace

1 Said Yes | Wish to be Enlightened?


:: 2004 13 May :: 9.30 pm

To those who remain...

To Andrew - For all the good times and all the bad times.

To Greg - For Wan Hung Lo and the food

To Ashley - For taking command when I was to lazy to.

To Matt - For throwing the shoe.

To Katie - For being broken, and for the smile.

To Natalie - For looking funny, and for the wave.

To Liz - For the laugh, and for the talks.

To those who led me through the times of trouble:

May the road rise up to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back,
May the sun shine warm on your face,
May the rain fall soft upon your fields.
May our children and their descendents
Be a hope to all humanity
May their hopes and dreams become united,
may we help one another to survive.
And until we meet again
May God hold you in the hollow of his hand.

Wish to be Enlightened?


:: 2004 23 April :: 10.48 am

I want everyone who reads this to ask me three questions. No more and no less. Ask me anything you want. Then, copy and paste this into your Journal allowing the people that read yours to ask you anything, too.

4 Said Yes | Wish to be Enlightened?


:: 2004 21 April :: 11.33 am

Anyone out there ever seen Riverdance? It's abso-fucking-lutly the most amazing dance show I've ever seen!

Wish to be Enlightened?


:: 2004 19 April :: 11.40 am

Most students were boys, but a few girls from wealthy families learned to read and write.

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 36.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions

Wish to be Enlightened?


:: 2004 16 April :: 1.05 pm

I can see what you cannot
Vision milky, then eyes rot
When you turn they will be gone
Whispering their hidden song
Then you see what cannot be
Shadows move where light should be
Out of darkness, out of mind
Cast not down the Halls of the Blind.

Wish to be Enlightened?


:: 2004 15 April :: 9.59 pm

CHARLIE MURPHY!
*Slap*

1 Said Yes | Wish to be Enlightened?


:: 2004 12 April :: 11.35 am

Suddenly something I'm not
You're something that you bought
Was it something I said, my friend
A little girl are you tripping on this
Are you tripping all over it
You better come up for air

Story about a girl
My
Story about the world
My

And are you waking up slowly
You're nothing but lonely
Are you waking up holding
Holding your breath
And are you looking for something
I promised you one thing
I promise I'll always
Always be
There

Baby girl, stand up and fight
This is not some paradise
Oh it's just where we live
And finally you think you're alright
And that it eats you up alive
You better get used to it

Story about a girl
My
Story about the world
My

And are you waking up slowly
You're nothing but lonely
Are you waking up holding
Holding your breath
And are you looking for something
I promised you one thing
I promise I'll always
Always be there

With all my faith
And all my heart
And all those simple things you are

I know
It's stuck inside your head
You're alone
You better get used to it
And I know
The feeling has to end
You're strong
It sucks you in again
And you're lost
You can't make any sense
This world
It tears you limb from limb
And hold on
You're nothing but the best

And are you waking up slowly
You're nothing but lonely
Are you waking up holding
Holding your breath
Are you looking for something
I promised you one thing
I promise I'll always
Always be there

With all my faith
And all my heart
And all those simple things you are

With all my faith
And all my heart
And all those simple things you are

3 Said Yes | Wish to be Enlightened?


:: 2004 2 April :: 1.34 pm

I probably won't update at all over spring break, because I'll forget to.

Wish to be Enlightened?


:: 2004 2 April :: 1.34 pm

When I was young I knew everything
She was a punk who rarely took advice
Now I'm guilt-stricken, sobbin' with my head on the floor
Stopping baby's breath and a shoe-full of rice now.

Can't be held responsible
She was touchin' her face
I won't be held responsible
She fell in love in the first place

For the life of me
I cannot remember
What made us think that we were wise and we'd never compromise
For the life of me,
I cannot believe we'd ever die
For these sins
We were merely Freshmen.

My best friend took a week's vacation to forget her
His girls took a week's worth of Valium and slept
Now he's guilt-stricken, sobbin' with his head on the floor
Ask him what he meant and how he never really felt he says:

Can't be held responsible
She was touchin' her face
I won't be held responsible
She fell in love in the first place

For the life of me
I cannot remember
What made us think that we were wise and we'd never compromise
For the life of me,
I cannot believe we'd ever die
For these sins
We were merely Freshmen.

We tried to wash our hands of all of this
We never talked about our lack in relationship
Now we're guilt-stricken, sobbing with our heads on the floor
We fell through the ice when we tried not to slip we'd say:

Can't be held responsible
She was touchin' her face
I won't be held responsible
She fell in love in the first place

For the life of me
I cannot remember
What made us think that we were wise and we'd never compromise
For the life of me,
I cannot believe we'd ever die
For these sins
We were merely Freshmen.

For the life of me
I cannot remember
What made us think that we were wise and we'd never compromise
For the life of me,
I cannot believe we'd ever die
For these sins
We were merely Freshmen.
We were merely Freshmen.
We were only Freshmen.

Wish to be Enlightened?

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