I really love this song from Earshot. Its so fucking kewl. Just makes me feel like jumping up and down and banging my head.
I don't get those people who arn't pissed at the world. Are they just ignoring everything around them and living their lives? Cause that's what it seems like to me. Can't they just wake up, get smart and look further then the horizon. It bugs. I'd love to rag/throw/kick/bash/smash all you motherfuckers up untill you see the truth.

Hell, heaven and life. They say hell is a fiery place where you will be consumed by the flames for all eternity. They say heaven is.... well what is it anyway.... I never really had someone tell me what heaven is like. And life...well I guess we all know what life is. It's a mixture of different things. And for each person their lives go in different ways. I don't care how they live their lives, though I have my opinion bout it how they live it. Someday I'll be dead and I'll go to heaven or hell... according to God I'll probably go to hell but I'd rather go to heaven since I can sleep forever there without being disturbed by annoying flames torching my ass. I don't understand why some people say they don't care bout going to hell. It's kind of a big ignorance you know. I mean you gotta admit you have no idea what awaits you there. What if it is worse then what you experience in life? Then your fucked cause there is no way out and you will be there for eternity. You'd probably wish "Oh crap, wish I went to heaven instead, damn" Or something it says in the bible... "if your not with me, then your against me" isn't that a bit radical. Satan is the father of lies, and God want's to be worshipped by everyone....I can't really see the good in both... So why do satanists become satanists and christians become christians? Hey I do believe God and Satan exist but doesn't mean I have to worship them right? They are both just well good guys I guess aslong as they don't fuck with me. Telling people what to do is just wrong you know, the devil says "worship me and I'll give you wealth and fame" yeah sure and die at the age of 36 cause of depression and an OD of drugs....doH~... And then God.... Well God just wants you to give up your life and be under his dictatorship (basicly paying your fee to enter heaven).
Some people start fucking cause they heard it in songs that its ok to fuck people aslong as you do it save..... PEOPLE we got minds of our own, don't just do something without thinking you know. Surely fucking someone probably gives a nice feeling, but so does eating a chocolate cake and you cant really compare those to each other now can you? (dont gimme any smart ass answers like..."well it could be as goood") right right. I agree with the fact that most people are controlled by the outside world. You know other people, music, work, money, fashion. They live their lives, they do what they do according to what they hear and see. That's bad bad bad bad....well I can't really say what you must do, but don't you think it's better to not do what they say but just think bout it really hard and then come to conclussion that sometimes things are just not right. I know you can feel it. Then why do you do it. I probably got a reason for everything I do. But I don't got a reason for loving her. She is and always will be the most important thing in my life. When you kill yourself, satan has won. When you live then you win. Just don't hate God or Satan...I think they both just got a bit of an issue going on. Ah well... none the less they arn't much different then humans right. Come to think of it I guess I am my own God. Ah well. Dont take that to litteraly.
I really got just one wish now and that's to be with Gaby no matter where it is. I miss her alot and Im worried bout her and it makes me nuts close to insane to not know how she is doing. But it's worth it...aslong as I'll see her again. Someday I hope I can write a book and it will make people realize that there is more in the world then what there is already.... just because you can't see it doesn't mean its not there you know. I love you Gaby with all my heart before and after death.

I was just wondering, could Gaby have already felt like I do now? I mean did she feel like I do now even when she talked to me? I can imagine then how bad she felt, but why. Hmpf it doesnt matter anymore, now she probably feels even more shit and that has to be really shit. No one can ever compete with that if you ask me. She's really strong that she can go through all this. Some people have easy lives. Like this girl Chrissy....she's such a spoiled brat. She just has everything she wants. Her life is so easy, but why does she get what she wants and not Gaby? Chrissy used to be cool but then she got a boyfriend and now she's all....well just not cool. Like a freakin barbie doll. Man she sucks. Oh and if you read this....to bad. I could care less bout it. I'm not jealous bout it, I wouldn't want life to be like what she has, it's just unfair that she gets it so easy. Gaby said Chrissy looks pretty.... what the fuck you know. I think she's a fat ugly cow. Big fucking deal. I never stay with friends for long, cause they just arn't real friends. But this Amber girl called me up a while ago, I mean to get my number. But why...she says I'm funny. Ok.... It bugs me, on one side I never wanna see her again but on the other side I would like to talk to someone again. Nah I'm fine the way I am. I'll go to school soon again so yeah enough people there to enjoy myself.... I'm just gonna be a loner again, sitting everywhere by myself. I just like to be alone without anyone bothering me. I wish Gaby would bother me now though, that we could argue bout something or just have fun or whatever... I wanna be with her. I wonder where she'll stay when she'll come here next time. She said she didn't wanna stay in my home again. I can imagine though, my family sucks big time. But my room aint so bad, its a really comfy place. I spend there all my spare time. Hmpf...what else is there to do. I really wanna think bout Gaby every second. I'm worried bout her right now though, I mean I know its saturday and she probably has something better to do. I just hope she doesn't kill herself there. She wouldn't even let me know if she did. Thats really the only thing I'm scared of in life, that she will kill herself, or that something bad happens to her. It really scares me.