'Cause sometimes that mountain you've been climbing is just a grain of sand What you've been up there searching for forever is in your hands When you figure out love is all that matters after all It sure makes everything else seem so small .

 

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This Candle's in a Hurricane

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spud

:: 2019 4 February :: 11.11pm

Recorded on 2.3.19
POD 9

Spoilers and sads, but don't worry, it's okay :)

2 listened | put on your bra


spud

:: 2019 1 February :: 7.24pm
:: Mood: FUNKY
:: Music: Marc Rebillet

recorded on 1.29.19

POD 8

got a little vulnerable for this one. probably oversharing. oh well. this is turning out to be good therapy for me.

put on your bra


spud

:: 2019 28 January :: 11.59pm

Recorded on 1.27.19
Flying solo for the snow day!

POD 7

put on your bra


spud

:: 2019 23 January :: 10.32pm
:: Music: papa vegas - gravity wars

recorded on 1.16.19
Featuring Brian and Lena!

We were all pretty tired, tbh. I was getting sick, but didn't know it yet.

POD 5

1 listened | put on your bra


spud

:: 2019 16 January :: 5.03pm
:: Mood: happy

recorded on 1.13.19

groupcast! ryan, libby, and lena all came to visit and join in on the fun.

lots of talk about food and bodily functions.

POD 4

ENJOY!

put on your bra


sugarjackj

:: 2019 5 January :: 10.59am
:: Music: Bikini Kill - Feels Blind

Going through my journal is always strange. I get so many mixed feelings. It's interesting to read where I've been, what I've done, how I felt.
Some spots are incredibly cringe worthy.
Found an old Photobucket with pictures I thought I'd lost when my old laptop was stolen.
It's neat looking through a timeline of my life expressed in my own words.
It's also painful. Looking back at the relationships and friendships I trashed. All of the horrible and tragic decisions I made. Time lost and people I've hurt.

I fell so far down the rabbit hole. I'm surprised I ever made it out.

Although sometimes it makes me sad to go through my old journal, it does remind me of where I've come from.
There has been much progress and personal growth.
So much more to go.

It's good.



1 listened | put on your bra


spud

:: 2019 4 January :: 12.28pm
:: Mood: amused

recorded on 1.2.19
STRANDS. OF. NONSENSE. <3

POD 3

feel free to HELP ME NAME THE 'CAST! :)

1 listened | put on your bra


spud

:: 2019 3 January :: 6.40pm
:: Mood: excited

recorded on 12.29.18
I'm still absolutely baffled that this thing is really happening, but it's rad as hell, and I don't care who knows it.

POD 2

1 listened | put on your bra


spud

:: 2018 31 December :: 1.39pm
:: Mood: jubilant

recorded on 12.28.18

POD 1

6 listened | put on your bra


spud

:: 2018 31 December :: 12.14pm
:: Music: Eric Clapton - Old Love

Happy New Year's Eve!
Greetings and welcome to the ending of the end of the year!

I would love to say 2018 was a momentous and eventful year, whether the events be good or bad, but in truth - not much happened. I rode my bike a lot. Paid someone to paint my house. Hosted the shit outta MCYPAA. Played a fair amount of drums.

Nothing earth-shattering.

Weight loss was probably the one goal I had for the year that failed utterly. Oh well. I tried hard. I'm giving myself a break for a bit.

Moving forward, I'm going to practice being a bit more selective about the things I say yes to. I keep booking myself for all this shit, and just wearing myself out. Expect a lot more music and recording stuff, and a little less AA service. I'm not quitting AA or anything, but I was a busy little beaver this year, and it was a bit too much. Went to a few meetings this weekend that I haven't hit in awhile. It was refreshing to see a lot of new faces in those places, and nice to reconnect with some people I hadn't seen in awhile.

One new thing I'm starting is a podcast!



That's what brought me to woohu today, actually. As I was sitting here thinking "fuck, where the hell am I going to host this thing?" it struck me that I ALREADY HAVE A WEB PAGE (spoiler alert, it's this one). I also remembered that I had a dummy gmail account I made like 10 years ago. Some college friends were going to be making a webseries, and they cast me to play one of the characters. The project never got off the ground, but his google presence lives on, and "Dustin" has 15GB of drive storage just sitting there empty.

So, thanks to the magnanimous Mr. Nash, and our good Mr. Andy, I would also like to welcome you to the new home of the as-yet-unnamed podcast I'm starting. When will there be updates? How will we track metrics and monetize our listenership? What will we do when we run out of storage on Dustin's google drive? These are all questions I will disregard for now and leave for my future self to contend with. SUCK IT, FUTURE ME!!!

put on your bra


spud

:: 2018 20 December :: 7.54am

crossposting generates hits, right? gimme dat viral content!
Tried breathing while I was putting on my shoes last night, and now my back is sore #sothisis32 CHEERS!

Maybe it's morbid to talk about, but at one point, my plan was to be dead by 30. I don't know, it was a nice round number that seemed so unimaginably OLD when I picked it. The concept of "live fast; die young" was quite romantic at the time. I am very grateful that the universe has something better in mind for me, and that I'm able to share my bonus time with you fine folks. It's all gravy from here on out! or icing on the cake...

Okay, those two metaphors sound gross when you mix them. But you get what I'm saying ;)

4 listened | put on your bra


spud

:: 2018 14 December :: 12.45am

I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN A LONG TIME.

WE ARE ALL ~very~ SURPRISED.

don't worry, life goes on :)

and honestly, it's not so bad. got some exciting stuff on the horizon. been very busy lately. but some good changes happening.

i realize that is frustratingly vague. even i will read this later and go, "what the fuck was i even talking about? worthless gibberish, all of it."

at least we'll be in that boat together, my friend.

put on your bra


spud

:: 2018 18 June :: 8.15am

link to article

It took some digging through sensationalist headlines to get straight to the source, but I'm glad I did. This is a very well-written account, explicit in its intent, which is not malicious. Some parts of this hit closer to home for me than others, but all of it is far too common a story. We could all stand to be better to each other, and to ourselves. How often we are held captive by our fears.

put on your bra


spud

:: 2018 24 March :: 2.39pm

I TALKED AT PEOPLE AND IT WAS SORTA FUNNY

3 listened | put on your bra


spud

:: 2016 5 November :: 12.49am
:: Mood: whoa, dude...
:: Music: the wallflowers

since last we met
yo. i'm still here.



I suppose a lot has happened in 2016 up to this point, and I should probably catch you up.

I didn't wind up getting that house. I did wind up getting out of my parents' basement. I was very fortunate to find an awesome roommate on craigslist. She owns her own home, and I rent the back bedroom. The price is right. We have fun. We eat food and watch tv and shit. I got super lucky to find this place, and appreciate that I get to live here. I didn't realize how much it bothered me living at dad's until I got out and felt this immense weight lifted off of my chest. That's not to say it's always sunshine and rainbows and shit here... but it's a lot better. I'm much more relaxed. More comfortable being myself. It took a few months being here to allow myself to ease into it. It's a good fit, for right now. It won't be forever, but it's nice to not be in a hurry to go anywhere. And she's not in a hurry to get me out of here, which is also nice.



I'm still single. Cold and alone, forever probably maybe. I still vascillate rapidly between deeply longing to be in a relationship and realizing that bachelorhood and freedom is actually pretty fucking rad. I mostly just want something warm to cuddle with. Maybe I should get a dog. I did do the 20-10-5 thing.

*spends half an hour looking for it*

... and now I can't remember what I did with it. I may have thrown it out. the big takeaway I can recall from it is that I'm shallower than I'd like to believe. I wanted to think that a sense of humor or intellectual stimulation would be the most important - and they were important, they definitely made the list of 20 (it was actually really hard to think of 20 things without being redundant) - but if you boil it down ... i have to be attracted to the person physically. have to. don't much care if anyone else thinks they're hot, but I damn well better think so. Otherwise there's no point to the rest of it. I wanted to think that I'm above all that physical superficiality, but apparently i'm not.

i have a "new" (year-old) lunchbag. it is gigantic and awesome. kathy got it for me. after all that bitching i did about her, she buys the best gifts. and i am an asshole. but the zipper works great

I still don't eat very healthy or exercise much. however i recently quit smoking tobacco. it's only been 11 days, so it's still a little premature to call it quits for good, officially, but this is the longest stretch of time i've gone without nicotine in my bloodstream in 10 years. it's kind of a big deal.

also, i bought myself a drum set:




I've been banging on that thing quite a bit lately.

like - all the freaking time. which is awesome.

i also built a drum. it's purdy:







It's at dad's house. I gave it to him because i wasn't crazy about how it sounded, and he didn't have a wood snare. he likes it, so i'm glad it worked out and found a good home. i probably would've warmed up to it over time. it didn't sound bad ... just not how i expected/hoped.

prior to that, i built a bookshelf and a nightstand for my bedroom. they turned out well. oak plywood is fucking expensive as balls. but it looks nice, and is rock solid. glued and screwed together. sanded and polyurethaned. should last a good long while. not perfect, but suitable for my needs.




I did wind up getting that 'promotion' at work. so now i have my own office, a company phone, and a slight (very slight) pay increase. it's a lot more responsibility - i'm running quality control for our entire plant - but it's not terrible all the time. i show up, do stuff, go home, and at the end of the week they deposit money in my bank account. it's a thing.

the basement audio lab has been put on hiatus for the time being. the other guys got busy with life and work and stuff and were unable to commit the time and energy they felt was necessary to continue the project. i can respect that they didn't want to half-ass it. and if things slow down, we'll pick it back up again.

in the meantime, i'm starting on a new project with different people. we will see what happens, but at least i'm still playing. there wasn't even that much down time, and i didn't have to go out looking for something, it came to me. so hopefully that's an indication that i'm supposed to be doing it. we don't have anything online yet.

Here's where the basement audio lab left off, if you'd like to hear what things sounded like right before we hit pause:

RIGHT CLICK - OPEN IN NEW TAB MOTHERFUCKER

6 listened | put on your bra

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