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m&ms487

:: 2008 29 July :: 8.54am

I almost passed out at work yesterday. I was processing a return and all of the sudden I felt a wave of heat come over me. I looked at the computer screen and it split into three screens (just like in the movies, in fact), and then I couldn't hear anything like I was underwater. So, I told my coworker to finish the return and I collapsed on the floor.

I called my parents to come and get me since I couldn't drive home, and I was wheeled out in a wheel chair.

I have the day off today, so I'm just resting now. I feel a lot better; I couldn't walk for a few hours after it happened.

It was really warm behind the service desk again, almost seventy nine. My dad was yelling at me saying that I shouldn't be passing out when it's only seventy nine and there are lots of people that work in factories where it's warmer than that. It put me off. I can't help it, and there's nothing that a doctor will be able to do. When it gets really hot and humid, I can't sweat, which makes me overheat. I don't know, I feel like I'm thirteen again and I'm getting yelled at for something I have no control over.

I'm not looking forward to this weekend, however. It's suppose to get up into the nineties. What do I have to do? Buy myself twelve box fans to take to work with me?

I can tell you this, I don't ever want to be wheeled out of meijer in a wheel chair again until I'm ninety and don't know the difference.

2 ::watch me bleed:: | ::cut me open...::


m&ms487

:: 2008 25 July :: 9.45pm


April 18

the slime of all my yesterdays
rots in the hollow of my skull

and if my stomach would contract
because of some explicable phenomenon
such as pregnancy or constipation

I would not remember you

or that because of sleep
infrequent as a moon of greencheese
that because of food
nourishing as violet leaves
that because of these

and in a few fatal yards of grass
in a few spaces of sky and treetops

a future was lost yesterday
as easily and irretrievably
as a tennis ball at twilight


-Sylvia Plath

::cut me open...::


m&ms487

:: 2008 19 July :: 8.22pm

There's nothing you can know that isn't known.
Nothing you can see that isn't shown.
Nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be.

::cut me open...::

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