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2004 13 May :: 5.22pm
$2.14 for fucking gas. How do they expect people to work? And live?
7 bonus cups |
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2004 13 May :: 2.12pm
Sometimes I just don't know what to do.
I could go jump off a cliff or something like that. That would only solve not having to deal with everything. But not everything in life is bad, so that would be a bit counter-productive. There's stressful things going on, but hey, that's fucking life. So I will deal with it.
1 bonus cup |
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2004 9 May :: 7.26pm
:: Music: Johnny Cash
"When I was just a baby my mama told me
Son, always be a good boy, don't ever play with guns.
But I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die
now every time I hear that whistle I hang my head and cry..."
2 bonus cups |
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2004 4 May :: 12.46pm
"How many hours a day do you spend in front of a television screen? A computer screen? Behind an automobile screen? What are you being screened from? How much of your life comes at you through a screen, vicariously while you sit and watch. Is watching things as exciting as doing things? Do you have enough time to do all the things you want to? Do you even have enough energy to?"
5 bonus cups |
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2004 29 April :: 9.10pm
I'm blowing up balloons right now so Jeff won't get lost. How funny is that. Hahaha.
2 bonus cups |
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2004 28 April :: 9.29pm
I got home after my match and I found a note. It said my mom went to work at City Hall. So I had a bowl of cereal and waited and all the sudden I see her drive up. She opens the door, lets the puppies in, then closes it. I go "Mom, Mom!" And she opens the door again and says "Look who I found!"
And I knew right then it was my dad. He came home early! And I started crying. I couldn't even barely listen to his stories because every time I looked at him I almost started to cry. I missed him so much. He's leaving again soon. For another week. I don't know...
3 bonus cups |
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2004 27 April :: 9.13pm
I bought Crime and Punishment today. So far it's been pretty good.
5 bonus cups |
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2004 27 April :: 1.26pm
So this is what happens when you let certain aspects of your life depend on material things. What a bad morning. And what timing. Best timing ever.
Yeah. Right.
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2004 23 April :: 10.23pm
you don't know because i don't show it.
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2004 23 April :: 2.14pm
:: Music: Against Me!- "we laugh at danger and break all the rules"
we might as well lay down and die
we're taking everyone down with us.
Today was just kind of a sad day. I don't know why. Talking to Morgan made me kind of nervous so now I have something else I have to take care of. And it made me feel sick. Like pain in the stomach sick. And so I went home after skills and I almost started crying again like I used to. Just for no reason. But it's different this time, because I was happy. Just...content. There was never anything wrong, I just felt like I saw something in life that no one else did. And how good it really can be. And how a song can make you cry because something about it just connects to everything and every beat lifts you up. I'm having these spontaneous feelings of things that I really want to do. I can't wait until summertime. I want to lay out under the stars. God I don't know if I sound...stupid or pathetic or what but you know, it's one of those "looking at life" moods.
4 bonus cups |
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2004 22 April :: 10.29pm
:: Music: Against Me!- "Walking Is Still Honest"
good song.
Dear mother,
This is just survival.
Cannot promise your children everything,
But you would lie so they can sleep tonight.
Defeat tasted nothing like you said.
Still 22 days left till the end of the world.
My legacy was making you a man
For a justice I could not change.
This is one voice not to forget;
"Fight every fight like you can win;
An iron fisted champion,
An iron willed fuck up."
Can anybody tell me why God won't speak to me?
Why Jesus never called on me to part the fucking seas?
Why death is easier than living?
You can be almost anything
When you're on your fucking knees.
Not today,
Not my son,
Not my family,
Not while walking is still honest,
And you haven't given up on me.
Dear shithead,
This isn't happening;
The sky is really falling,
The paint's all made of lead,
There's asbestos in the walls,
Hell's coming to rip off the doors
To the priveleged mansion.
Do you want to love and feel it?
You can look but you can't taste it.
You can reach but you'll never have it.
We are untouchable;
Untouchable is something to be.
Can anybody tell me why God won't speak to me?
Why Jesus never called on me to part the fucking seas?
Why death is easier than living?
You can be almost anything
When you're on your fucking knees.
Not today,
Not my son,
Not my family,
Not while walking is still honest,
And you haven't given up on me,
And you haven't given up on me,
And you haven't forgotten me...
5 bonus cups |
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2004 22 April :: 1.31pm
I love him.
3 bonus cups |
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2004 19 April :: 11.01pm
:: Music: Coheed and Cambria- "The Camper Velourium III: Al The Killer"
Will the killing veil love should the heroes play dumb
But killings no fun when the heroes are none.
1 bonus cup |
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2004 19 April :: 9.31pm
:: Music: Coheed and Cambria- In Kepping Secrets of Silent Earth: 3
Oh man.
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2004 19 April :: 1.09pm
AH I wish you were awake! Come over come over come over come over. I leave at 3. If you are not busy, call me or something. :-)
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