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Black roses and Silver tears

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:: 2004 31 March :: 7.37 pm

Grr.
Sorry guys, but both our household computers have got nasy viruses, so I won't be able to update for quite a while. Sorry guys. I'm not happy about it AT ALL. No sir. I'm actually quite poissed off about it. So, send me e-mails.

insanepyrovampy@yahoo.com

Thanks guys.

;_;

~Caro

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:: 2004 29 March :: 6.18 pm

BSB: (eating hat L.)
BSB *k)
BSB: I MISPELLED THE LETTER K!!!!!!!!!)

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:: 2004 29 March :: 1.36 pm

THANK YOU NEE FOR THE ROCKIN' LAYOUT!!!
^__________^



      
Marriage is love.




Don't mind what I said yesterday. I was so pissed off I couldn't see straight. I ment what I said, but i shouldn't have said it. Most of it at any rate. *Sigh* I'm just a baka some times. T.T Oh well.

~Caro

1 See through my crystal fears | Are you crying?


:: 2004 28 March :: 8.31 pm

Damn. My hands are shaking. I'm hating this.

Nee is having some trouble.
That's all I am going to say besides this:
I would neve, EVER say that hated her. She asked me to last night, and I couldn't. I just couldn't! I think her online lover is a jerkface. Sorry, Nee, but I really do. I can't stand leting him put you through what you went through last night. *Big hug* I hope you read the poem in the post below this. And I'm sorry you have to go through all this shit. I really am. It's just completely unfair.

Other than that, I'm depressed as all hell, for other reasons.

~Caro

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:: 2004 28 March :: 7.59 pm

I just want her to be happy,
To know i love her,
To know that I would never hate her,
To know...
I just want her to have joy in her life,
Whatever it comes from.
I just want you to be happy!
I love you.
You are my dearest friend.
There is so much I can't put in to words,
So much you have given me,
So much...

For Nee.

Are you crying?


:: 2004 26 March :: 8.20 pm

Fuck this all. I feel like shit. I'm hating the world and myself. I'm just so angry and depressed! Gods! I hate this!!!

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:: 2004 25 March :: 11.08 am
:: Music: resurection, DJ Irene

Hidy-ho there folkles. Today is Alan's (He's one of the guys) birthday party. I drew him a picture of his charactor ^_^ I'm also geting him something else, but I'm not telling what it is XD
Maybe later.
I came up with a cool starter for an rpg ^_^ You all must read it.


He stooped in a back alley way, the rain pouring down on him, plastering his spiky blonde hair to his back, he was hunched over in pain, gasping for breath. The pupils of his sea blue eyes were tiny as he tried to breath. The figure that stood above him was grinning mercilessly at the Thin boy on his hands and knees panting and dripping blood onto the ground from a huge wound on his chest. A huge buster sword lay discarded on the ground several yards from the two boys, the blue pattern on the strange triangular blade shimmering in the half light. The boy that was standing held a bloody katana and looked very satisfied. He smirked and looked down on the other boy who was topless and also had huge bloody lines on his shoulder blades, as if something had broken out of his back. He grinned. "Poor, poor Cloudy. Beaten at his own game. Tisk tisk." Pools of blood were beginning to form around the boy's hands. The blood dripping from his chest was also beginning to pool, soaking into the knees of his pants. He still struggled to breath. He suddenly shuddered and collapsed into the pools of his own red blood. The figure grinned. "And now I take my leave. Goodbye, Cloud. It's been fun as all shit." He walked out of the back of the alley and disappeared into the darkness. Cloud shivered as the rain pelted down on his back. My blood...it's so cold...So is the rain...I'm so cold...So...cold... with these thoughts his eyes closed. His blood began to stain his pale spiky blonde hair. His body was loosing what little life was left after the beating he had received form Xennen. Xennen... He killed me... He shivered again.

Buahahahaha.....*Evil grin*

Ehem. heh.

Anywho... *Looks around shiftily*

Not much else to say at this point. See you all around.

Are you crying?


:: 2004 20 March :: 10.30 pm

Well, I woke up this morning at six. I had to do a singing competition at eleven thirty and be there by ten fourty five. So I had some time to kill in which I was very bored. We went to go to Macdonalds and they were only serving breakfast so I had cookies for breakfast. Mmmm....Cookies. So I sang Amazing Grace fine (Besides my fuggin cold) and had to start All the Pretty Little Horses over THREE TIMES. Yes. Three. -_- I was thrilled. I felt like a Baka. Then I went to to Medicin Horse and saw Sierra, the baby horse I'm taking care of. Come home, took a shower, watched Trigun. Went to Saimese Plate for dinner, then to Dairy Queen. Came home and typed this up. Go me. I'm going to go watch the last episodes of Trigun after this. I intend to have an Evengelion-thon all this week. I need to re-watch the series. So that's about it. Love you guys. Thanks for being there for me when I need you. *Hugs you all*

~Caro

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:: 2004 17 March :: 7.11 pm

CSAPs SUCK!
I felt like SHIT all day becuase I did shittily on the Math CSAPs. REALLY badly. It ruined my day.






~Caro

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:: 2004 14 March :: 7.41 pm

*sigh*
I could not stand it if Woohu got shut down. I would not feel safe posting this stuff anywhere else for fear of Hunter being on one of those sites. Gods know I love this site. It's about a billion times better that Livejournal.

Anyway. I just got back from RPG and spending a few hours afterwards with the guys. Hunter left a bit early, but I stayed after he left for about thirty or fourty minutes. *Sighs again.*I must be pretty good at not letting on that I like him. Oh well. He complimented my art. I finaly figured out how to draw wings. I drew a picture of a girl with huge wings from the back, covered in chains, at seven this morning. I went to sleep at nine, woke up at four, went to sleep again at six fifteen and woke up again at seven. Grrr...
I hate having to leave Hunter and the guys.
And today I found out that Hunter turns seventeen in June. A friend of mine just pointed out
Friend: once he turns 18 he won't legally be allowed to touch you
Friend: and..I'm not sure that he is now
Caro: Great.

Yep. That makes my day. And he's right, too. As you can imagine I'm thrilled. Plus, he'll probly move away at that point. Grrr.....
Anywho. Not much else to say, unfortunately. Oh, Nee hopefully gets to go to the Anime Convention, which she may not have been able to do. So I'm glad she gets to do that.


~Caro

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:: 2004 12 March :: 10.16 pm

Hello.
I am here to tell you that I'm fuggin depressed. Not much more to say.
Oh. I bought clothes. They're cool. I got a skirt and lovely top for my singing competition.
And I bought a skirt, tights and a shirt. yay.
Goodbye.

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:: 2004 9 March :: 6.48 pm

Stupid CSAPs. I hate them. Today I went to far in the friggen packet.
Color the circle next to the aproreate answer:
And now I'm ___________
o Bored
o Fried
o Tired
o Sick
o Pissed
o All of the above.

If you chose All of the above, you are correct!
-______________-
grr.
And Hana just left in the middle of a conversation. -___-
I have had it today. I just want to curl up and read or RPG, but my eyes hurt to much to read and there is no one on to RPG.


~Caro

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:: 2004 8 March :: 7.27 pm
:: Mood: anxious

Sorry I hadn't/Haven't posted in a while. Thisngs have been busy around here, and mom's computer had a virus for quite a while. Well, My computer has a web browswer again, which makes me glad. CSAPs start tommorow. I'm very anxious about them. I've never taken them before. Yea. I'm nervous. Really nervous.
I'm about to start a panting to keep my mind off of the tests. So, talk to you all later.

~Caro

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:: 2004 6 March :: 1.40 am

Seven Days A week, The Sounds.
I have just returned for my very first concert. Oh my fugging GOD! IT WAS AMAZING! I saw Ima Robot(Who I didn't like much), Kill Hannah (Who were AWESOME) and The Sounds, Whowere by far the best thing I've ever seen. Ever. I smell like cigaret smoke though. ^_^; It's worth it. It's so worth it. I went with Kelly and met this guy who loved my nightmare before christmas hoodie and worshiped TIm Burton just like I do! ^________^ He was gay, though, I'm sure. I didn't get his e-mail address either! ; . ; I think I'm in love with the Keyboard player from The Sounds. He was sexy! And he took off his shirt! hehe ^______^;; I still love Hunter more, lol. But he was hott. He looked a lot like Pentaice. A Lot. (Only Nee will know what that means) His hair was like that only brown. He was cute! Ehem. Any who, it was AMAZING! The other two bands didn't really have a keyboard player. And he was playing a Moog sounding synth, too. The lady from The Sounds was all over the stage, dancing and singing and standing on the drums, kicking her feet and all sorts of stuff. And Kill Hannah wasn't half bad either! Man, they both rocked so hard!Eeeeeee! It was so cool. But I smell like cigaret smoke. I hope dad doesn't think I was smoking. I'll have to take a shower. It's 2:06 AM right now. Oi. These stoned dudes came up behind me and pulled my hoodie over my head and were like, in slured words, "Who rocks you? THE SOUNDS ALL THE WAY!" I'm like "Would you like a sticker?" I was helping Kelly promote some cool stuff, and they're like, "No, I don't want any more drugs, I'm already on cokane and weed" And walked off.....
Yea. o.O
But I didn't see anyone selling drugs...yay.
The main singer of the Sounds looked like a mentor of mine from a while back, only younger. I almost cried...
Of course, that could have been from all the smoke.


~Caro

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:: 2004 1 March :: 8.04 pm

Well, I had a meeting about high Schools today...It was "fun". So, we were meeting with the people from New Vista and Boulder High and as we may or may not know, My sister had a hiddeous time at Boulder High, so mum vowed never to put another child through that.
We ended up looking more at Boulder High. e.e I know! *Laughs* The people from New Vista said that the transitions they've had from intesive schools like Halcyon have filed meserably. Yea...So I won't be going there...
So for schools it's down to September school and Boulder High, which sounds like it has a good special ed. program. I'm going to shadow at September on Friday and I'll be taking a few classes at Boulder High (A tenth grade LA Calss!). I hope I can go to September. From what I heard it's a really good school. Hunter really liked it while he went there. That's good marks on my list! ^______^;;

~Caro

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:: 2004 29 February :: 9.12 pm

Havent updated in a while. Just went shopping with my sister. It was fun! ^_^
It would seem that Hunter has moved in with his dad, so I don't get to see Alison, which sucks majorly. RPG was at his dad's, and they have no phone. x.x I know! They just moved in there. I got compliments on my art. o^_^o hunter said some of my pictures were very bad ass (Direct quote) I don't know how I managed not to blush XD
Ooh. I just met Aimee's (my sister) guy that she is dating about three seconds ago. He likes Daft Punk!! He's very cool. ^_^ A good catch, I'd say. *Laughs*
I'm not feeling so great, myself, so I'll go now. I'll tell you more later, maybe. I've had weird dreams...

~Caro

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:: 2004 22 February :: 8.23 pm

Go check out my art! www.pyrovampy.deviantart.com

In other news:
Gods. When I'm around Hunter I forget there is school tommorow, I forget my family is beeing torn appart, I forget I never see any of my other friends, I forget all the things I've tried so hard to forget otherwise. All my preoblems melt away. *Sigh* I love it. Then, when I leave, all the things come rushing back. ._. I worry about that test coming up, about the fact that we start Geometry tommorow...But I have peice when I'm with him.

~Caro

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:: 2004 20 February :: 6.28 pm

Woohu! It's the weekend. But I have an infection where one of my earrings is...

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:: 2004 18 February :: 11.11 am

Well I'm home from school. I got really sick last night. Yea, it sucks.

~caro

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:: 2004 17 February :: 8.43 pm

I cryed for a whole frikken hour at school today. One WHOLE HOUR! And I wanted to call mom to see if she knew what I should do, and they wouldn't let me! Gaahhh!

On the up side, I saw a long lost friend.

Overall day rating: ; _ ;

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:: 2004 16 February :: 11.13 pm

Lastnight I had a very very bad nightmarish dream about hunter. e-mail me if you want to know more.

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:: 2004 15 February :: 11.43 pm
:: Mood: Crying

Gods Damnitt
So the guys and I went to lazer tag with the church group. I had a blast. On the way back Hunter was sitting next to me. I liked the warmth of his body next to mine. We got back at 8:30 and I was thinking I'd stay till 9:30 and we could rpg some more. So I called Mom to see if she would come pick me up then. She refused and said she would pick me up then. So Dad came and picked me up. I was already on the verge of tears because I didn't want to leave vurtualy my only friends I ever see and have things in common with and dad said to me once we got in the car "This is the second time in a row you've done this to me." "Done what?" "Made me come and get you when you said Allison would drop you off!" I was thinking: I didn't know that I wouldn't get back till 8:30!! Then I said I was in a bad mood and he asked why. I said I didn't want to talk about it. He said "Well I'll just be your chaffuer then." "I don't need to tell you everything!" So we got home and I went into the office with my sister and broke down crying. I hate myself sometimes. I wanted to stay with my friends!!! Oh, no. I'm gonn a start crying again. Gods..

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:: 2004 14 February :: 8.10 pm

*Is wearing the Heartless shirt* I forgot to mention...Last night I had insomnea, so I was up till 1:12 watching Trigun, then I had nothing to do so I drew a picture, then I diced I needed to go to sleep, so I lay there untill 1:42, relized I hadn't taken my meds, went downstairs and took my Seraquel. Then I was still up till about 2:30. Joy of joyous joys. -_- But Trigun is cool!

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:: 2004 14 February :: 3.31 pm

Happy facking Valintine's day
I just finished painting a shirt with a sketchy Heartless (Kingdom Hearts) Symbol. Hopefully it'll be dry enought to wear later.
*Evil grin*
Oh well, at least I get to be with horses today.


~Caro

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:: 2004 14 February :: 1.12 am

Alrighty. So today mom and I went and painted pottery. I painted an oriental tea cup and a sushi bowl. I put a branch of Sakuras on the tea cup and one on the bootom on the inside. I hope it turns out well ^_^

I got my picture of Jack skellington up. You can see it on my deviantART page
www.pyrovampy.deviantart.com It's my featured Deviation. ^_^ Please comment!

So'm I'm feeling better today. Tommorow is Valintines day but I chose not to think about it! ^_~ Just fool myself.

TRIGUN ROCKS! I just rented some of it! It rocks so hard!

Love you all! Miss you Nee!

~Caro

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:: 2004 12 February :: 10.13 pm

And so, I dont have much to say except for....




FOUR DAY WEEKEND!!!!!! WOOHU!!! ^_____^


Other than that, I'm not feelining my best, but oh well...

~Caro


I don't wanna...but I'll do it anywayWhat anime cliche are you? The Second time around.

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:: 2004 11 February :: 9.16 pm

Had a wreched day at school. I was in soooo much pain. It's not even funny. Nee, I miss you muchly! I'm sorry I'm never home when you call. It's driving me friggen nuts! I need to talk to you so badly. Things just seem to be going wrong.

Please, Goddess, let there be a snow day tommorow! I need it badly.

~Caro

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:: 2004 10 February :: 10.55 pm

What she ended up writing.
A ratteling sigh excaped her lips. Once again she did not know what to do. She stared blankly at her computer screen wondering what to write. She had been deppressd which was as to be torn appart and shredded into peices. How could she place that strange feeling of emptiness and wrongness inside of her into words. She didn't know how. How could she do the same for theway she felt when he smiled at her? She didn't know. And this is waht she ended up writing.

~She

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:: 2004 9 February :: 6.42 pm

*Sigh*
Today Tiffany kept rambling about how Saturday is Valintine's day and how she and her boyfriend (Yes, she actualy has one) are going to get together and shyt. Yes. With a "y". As in, "Why couldn't I have a boyfriend?!" She says "I found a guy who is like, your soul mate." I said I already found my soul mate, but he doesn't know it. *Big long frustrated sigh* What I didn't tell her was that I can't really do anything about it. Yea. So....Yea.

~Caro

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:: 2004 6 February :: 9.25 pm

Ahhhg....I still have my wretched cough. You know, life suxzorz some times. Now is just one of those moments.

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