rockon14
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2003 31 December :: 12.01am
:: Mood: geeky
:: Music: Back to Before
a song
I've been writing. I got the Ragtime CDs for Christmas. This song is on it....it reminds me of a certain person.
There was a time our happiness seemed never ending
I was so sure that where we were heading was right
Life was a road so certain and straight and unbending
Our little road with never a crossroad in sight
Back in the days when we spoke in civilized voices
Women in white and sturdy young men at the oars
Back in the days when I let you make all my choices
We can never go back to before
There was a time my feet were so solidly planted
You'd sail away while I turned my back to the sea
I was content a princess asleep and enchanted
If I had dreams, then I let you dream them for me
Back in the days when everything seemed so much clearer
Women in white who knew what their lives had in store
Where are they now, those women who stared from the mirror?
We can never go back to before
There are people out there unafraid of revealing
That they might have a feeling or they might have been wrong
There are people out there unafriad to feel sorrow
Unafraid of tomorrow
Unafraid to be weak
Unafraid to be strong
There was a time when you were the person in motion
I was you wife, it never occured to want more
You were my sky, my moon
And my stars, and my ocean
But we can never go back to before
We can never go back to before
You can't make me talk!
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plainmornings
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2003 30 December :: 4.00pm
being 18 rocks.
i'm slowly becoming addicted to scratch off lotto tickets. Poor, Very Poor.
been working like cray-z but gregory works con me so its all gravy.
saw mona lisa smile, i liked much. saw elf con sr. Selinsky, that was fun.
still have 80bazillion people to see and soooo little time :0(
Ms. Jennifer slept over last night, we talked till almost 5 (and i work up at like 2)
ummmm saw my favorite Soy guy & talked Vonnegut (whitney i have to show you the post)
ummmm saw Big Ben & his crazy MIT friends.
Dennys for some raw chicken.
leaving on Jan 1st sooooooo everyone has to hang out before then!
oh yeah... heidi, alex & dom came to visit yesterday <3
You can't make me talk!
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rockon14
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2003 24 December :: 12.49am
:: Mood: geeky
:: Music: Urinetown
Jillian's
I seem to be hanging there a lot all of the sudden. Makes no sense at all.
None I tell you. None.
In case you don't know, Jillian's is this resturant/bar/game place where there's all around fun. I've been spending a lot of time with Lys and her boyfriend works there. She's dragging me there to see Brent. He called me cute at one point. At another point her threw an icky dish towel at my head. He always wants me to come on Tuesday for Trivia. Pam took me tonight (actually...now it's last night.) I like hanging out with Pam. She's super cool and tons of fun. Nick and Lyssa think Brent likes me and I think they're all crazy. I don't know why I go along with it. I really don't know. ehh...probably because I have fun...but I'm not really admitting to that right now. Brent did a little jump for me...it was lovely. I feel like some little school girl going on and on and on...so i'm going to shut up.
right now.
You can't make me talk!
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plainmornings
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2003 20 December :: 1.01pm
thank you to everyone who made my birthday wonderful <3<3<3
can't believe i'm 18!!
4 Spoke |
You can't make me talk!
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rockon14
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2003 19 December :: 12.11am
:: Mood: dorky
:: Music: Gavin Creel <3
My life
Have I before mentioned that I hate being at home?....hmmmm
Yeah people should come and hang out with me. I'm so lonely, sadness.
Actually, if we can all have a little moment of honesty here, I'm truly happy right now. I feel like life is so full and wonderful. I just wish I could spread this feeling to everyone. Of course I'm sure half of the people would want to knock my head off for being such a sissy 'do gooder'
But I'm happy
And I'm eating...
three whole meals a day
It's amazing
I know why too...a certain boy...who makes me hate myself. But I won't let him do that to me anymore. I swear it.
"Getting out of this hole, I'll be strong and alone.
No regrets...maybe one...maybe two or three.
If I had it to do over again, I'd do it to them before they did it to me.
If I had it to do over again, I'd do it to him before he did it to me." Whistle Down the Wind
I feel like the biggest geek in the world, which by the way I'm quite sure I am. I've just watched the first two Lord of the Rings movies. Ohhh buddy. If I don't see the third one soon I'll do something crazy. See I don't do this waiting thing...maybe that's why I only just now saw the first two. But they're soo wonderful. I don't know how I went on so long without it.
I have amazing friends who should all recieve kisses on their foreheads.
I <3 geeks
You can't make me talk!
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rockon14
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2003 15 December :: 10.37pm
:: Mood: ecstatic
:: Music: Gavin Creel
thinking
I've been thinking a lot lately. Mainly about what I want in life. Here's one thing I came up with upon the subject of having a boyfriend.
Right now I feel like I really really want a boyfriend. For once I want to be able to go to a family get together and when they ask, "So do you have a boyfriend yet?" I can finally say, "Yes...as a matter of fact I do." Of course, being Bekie, I have to be picky...like I am with everything almost. I want someone who is going to love me just the way I am. He will love my pink fingernail polish with glitter in it. He will not think that it's strange that I like to eat cereal and drink orange soda. He will think I'm funny and he'll never get tired of being around me. He will never think I'm fat or ugly. I will be able to cry in front of him. He will kiss me on the forehead without me ever having to say anything to him. He will drive with me down empty street late at night with the windows rolled down and the radio up. He will walk in the rain with me and it won't bother him. He will go out with me late at night when I have to get out and he'll just understand why. He'll just understand me. He won't want to change me in any way at all. I will be perfect just being myself.
Maybe he isn't real and I'm being stupid.
Still....that's what I want.
So there, I said it.
You can't make me talk!
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rockon14
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2003 14 December :: 3.03pm
:: Mood: artistic
:: Music: Ragtime
Christmas Break Time
I'm at my parnets house for Christmas Break. I hate it here. I've decided I'm going to spend my entire break far far away from this house until it's time to go back home.
I promised Matt I would hang out with him all break long. He's a super cool guy.
I'm going to hang with the kids at Berkmar on Monday. They make my life quite a beautiful thing.
I don't understand the point of making up a bed...ehh...yeah.
Tim asked me out. I'm thinking about it.
Think think think think.
I told him to give me a week.
He keeps on asking me anyway.
I can't remember when my week is supposed to be up.
I guess he'll call me and let me know it's been a week.
Whatever
People should call me at my house
My parent's house that is
There are a lot of spaces in this entry
You can't make me talk!
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rockon14
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2003 8 December :: 5.05pm
:: Mood: cheerful
:: Music: Give me just a little more time
yeah, yeah I'm updating
Not too much has happened this week. I went home this past weekend and I actually enjoyed it. I'll tell you about that.
Friday Tim came to Carrollton and picked me up. We went to Wal*mart. There was a man playing trumpet and I gave him two dollars. He had pretty eyes.
Saturday Tim and I went Christmas shopping. I got through like two gifts and then I ran out of money. Being poor sucks! After that we went to Madrigal Dinner. It was such a beautiful thing. I got to see MARY. She sat at our table...which rocked. I think half the people there were ready to kill all the alumni. We made a lot of noise...it was great. As for people in the show I got to see many many lovely people. Some of these lovely people are LAURA, MATT, AND CHRIS!!!!! Geeeze I missed them all sooooo much. After that Matt, Chris and this freshman girl (I do believe her name was Alise or however you would spell that) went to Waffle House. It was some good eatin'. I soo have to hang out with Matt all during Christmas break. He's s super cool guy.
You know for this past week, I haven't been this happy in a long long time. I haven't talked to Parks all week. I'm quite sure that has something to do with it.
Everyone should get free ice cream.
I've been eating more
You can't make me talk!
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plainmornings
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2003 4 December :: 10.31pm
i really hate this feeling.
people are envious of me... i really don't know why.
if people like me, want to be my friend then why do i always feel so alone
i constantly find myself watching friends joking around, making plans... i used to have that.. if this is what everythings being reduced to by growing up then i don't know if i really want to...
16 day. 16 days until i turn 18. thats 2 weeks and 2 days.
i don't know.
i'm a dreamer... i've always held such high hopes and aspirations and .. i don't know.
i can't seem to get excited about anything anymore... is that bad?
2 Spoke |
You can't make me talk!
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rockon14
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2003 30 November :: 9.00pm
:: Mood: crazy
:: Music: Musicals
I'm Home!!!!
It's so good to be back in the dorm room. I hadn't even realized how much this place had become home until I left it.
I'm not gonna write too much...I have to dry my hair.
Thanksgiving was....interesting to say the least. I didn't eat too much. Made me very happy.
It smells like hamster.
I'm going to work on the website. I'll put a link up here when I'm finished. It's going to be beautiful
I'm feelin' pretty fine.
You can't make me talk!
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