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:: 2003 11 April :: 4.33 pm

:-( crystal i'm so sorry :_-(
hm.

goin' over to jeff's bonfire tonight should be fun. pretty soon i have to go pick up jessi.
choose the pink vest robby...choose the pink vest robby...choose the pink vest robby...choose the pink vest robby...ch-
hahaha.
He so truthful. robby you're awesome.

HiLaRyAnN13 (4:28:36 PM): this morning i had the funniest conversation with my mom

Auto response from blitzkrieg689 (4:28:38 PM): taking a crap


HiLaRyAnN13 (4:28:41 PM): HAHA

So yeah. haha. Mom woke me up this morning, i know she gets a kick out of this. It's just what happens when you wake me up early...
Me-"Did you get the job?"
Mom-"Where???"
Me-"At Domino's"
Mom-"I don't work at Domino's....."
Me-"I swear you did. Why not?"
Mom-"I don't work there..."
Me-(yelling)"But I wanted the free mozzarella sticks!!!"
Mom-"Call me when you wake up"
Me-"Call me when you get to work"
Mom-"No, you call me when you get to work."
Me-"I'm not working."
Mom-"I know, just keeping you on your toes."
Me-"zzz....i'll call you later."

Gah. hahaha. Jessi says that one morning she should just show up in there with a video cam. :-P
But yeah. i have to go soon. Today is going to be a blast! :-)

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:: 2003 10 April :: 10.50 pm
:: Music: Sondre Lerche-Dead Passengers

He has a nice voice.
I could be the happiest person on the plantet (yet barely attainable anyway), and I'd still be bothered by something.
I mean, I could be so happy (think skipping gleefully through a nice, brightly-colored field with a little puppy just jumping to catch up), and in less than a second I could think of something or read something that would completely change my mood. (think of a sudden hurricane...it'd have to be something scary)
And then i'm back at square one, trying to acheive happiness once again. And the whole issue just repeats itself. Again and again and again. And so continues my life.
But have I really learned to live it?
I don't think i'll ever know. Why try to acheive happiness. I'm going to let it find me. That's right, back at my lazy antics. YOU FIND ME HAPPINESS!!! Cause I'm not getting off my butt.
hahaha. I'm so weird. Hey, guess what. I just cheered myself up with my own stupidity. hahaha. :-D

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:: 2003 10 April :: 10.35 pm

i'm writing a story about an insomniac. which is easy to do since i can never sleep.
Chapter One-



When the day starts, it never ends. And to lie there and wait for light to creep in through the smallest cracks in the blinds of the window was a ritual. Not a chosen ritual though. So as usual, I stared at the ceiling fan endlessly circling around and around overhead. It was unimaginable that the buzzing noise could bring even the slightest bit of relaxation, but it did. And I had to be the most boring person on the planet. “Do boring people know they’re boring, though?” I thought to myself. I jumped out of bed and hopped in the shower.


~
ehhhh...I can't think of anything else to write. But something usually comes to me around 12 o'clock. haha.
~

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:: 2003 10 April :: 10.28 pm
:: Music: Slow Coming Day-Pages

And as the rain falls
on my face
a darkness lingers
and haunted memories plague my mind
vivid pictures of all the
pastimes
and all i left behind
i left behind
i left behind

~
I'm in a melancholey state.
~
wow. there's 503 guests on here right at this very second. that's a lot.

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:: 2003 10 April :: 9.53 pm

Get on the bus it's time to go...
A lot of stuff happened today. Dad was in a bad mood when he picked me up, but it's usual right about now. I spent the day with my grandma and grandpa. They're the best. I love them so much. I had so much fun. My grandma is the coolest. :-) We spent the whole day just having fun and stuff. We went out to Thousand Oaks to have lunch, then we went to some stores, then we drove around the the other mall and we went to Max and Erma's. She says "whenever we go out to eat there's never any room for dessert. So lets get some!" And we got their whole sundae thing where you can go up as much as you want. too bad i barely had enough room for one, but it was very good. I can talk to her about anything. It's so great. Then I went to hot topic and she went too it was fun. She says she likes that store. hehe. I called jess tonight. She's spending the night tomorrow. cool. I had a lot to say...but now I don't. Mom is being grumpy. grrrrrrrrrrr. I wrote a song today. :-) kind of :-/ Anyway...

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:: 2003 9 April :: 11.32 pm

Will we ever feel this real again?
Will you ever feel this real again?
Not today...

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:: 2003 9 April :: 11.28 pm
:: Music: Trapt-Made Of Glass

It could take years to find you,
It could take years to find myself
And I don't need to hear your answer
I just need you to see...

blah blah blah
I can't sleep. blah blah blah.

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:: 2003 9 April :: 10.52 pm
:: Music: Longwave-Tidal Wave

Take me down...
Yes. Indeed. Tonight was nice.
I need to get to bed. Tomorrow gram and I are goin' shoppin. Grandma's are nice and fun and cook really good food. Grandpa's are cool too, but when it comes to shoppin'...haha. But yeah. I have to get up early tomorrow. ugh.
Anyway. Yeah. I wish i had a huge wall canvas. That's going to be one of my ideas for my room. Just a whole wall to paint something on. It's going to be my sanctuary and I'm never leaving it. It's so nice right now, too. I think I like being alone.

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:: 2003 9 April :: 5.31 pm
:: Music: The Rocket Summer-December Days

Too bad let's make it with what we have...
Wow. RYAN!!! I'm glad you are okay! wow. So yeah. Plans didn't work out but that's okay. Brakes are scary...when they don't work! Ahhhh.
I've found some good music lately, it makes me happy.

Without you I can't be me. I just wanna see you, just wanna be you, cause i don't wanna let you down. Do they care??? to care...
lalalalala. :-)
And I am SICK of my puppies!!!!!! GAHHH.
Okay. that is all. :-P

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:: 2003 9 April :: 1.40 pm

Hehehe, ahhhhh
Jessi stinks!

Today IS going to be fun. A good day.
And i'm writing a story. Yes. Indeed. okay. later :-P

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:: 2003 9 April :: 1.35 pm
:: Music: Longwave-Tidal Wave

The hardest thing you ever gave away is the hardest thing to keep.
<...>...<...>...<...>...<...>...<...>...<...>...<...>
Today is going to be a good day.
I hope.

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:: 2003 8 April :: 11.44 pm
:: Music: Trapt-Made Of Glass

also a good song...
I'm bored.
And kind of mad. But not mad enough to think about this all night long. Eh.

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:: 2003 8 April :: 11.20 pm
:: Music: Slow Coming Day- When Time Stood Still

This band is really really nice.
I like it a lot.



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:: 2003 7 April :: 3.25 pm
:: Music: The Ataris- In This Diary

It still brings a smile to my face.
Goin' to Jessi's tonight. Should be much fun. We're going to watch the Exorcist and pee our pants. I heard it's the thing to do nowadays. haha. Nah. whatever. I've had to take care of puppies all day today, I'm so tired out by them. Gah. Blacktop singin' me to sleep...

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:: 2003 7 April :: 1.29 am

eh...whatever.
I feel lethargic. Time for bed.
I've given up on feelings.
Nothing is special.

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