izntlifesojuicy
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2005 29 October :: 12.51pm
:: Mood: sad
:: Music: Your Legs Grow by Nada Surf
lyrics.. song introduced by emily
If you were here
baby we'd increase the dose
there was no fear
in my room when we got close
call me anytime you've got a ghost
you're the only person in the world
i feel that way about
and if you move off to the side
i'll get swept back out
where it's cold but not that deep
cos your legs grow
cold but not that deep
cos your legs grow
there's a lot that rises up
from the bottom of the lake
and its beam has hit me hard
now i'm wide awake
where it's cold but not that deep
cos your legs grow
cold but not that deep
cos your legs grow
if you were here
baby we'd increase the dose
there was no fear
in my room when we got close
call me anytime you've got a ghost
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That would be for me
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izntlifesojuicy
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2005 27 October :: 5.07pm
:: Music: Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap
he called
and now im crying
i wish he knew how i felt
i wish i could talk to him about it
but i never seem to get the chance
whenever i get upset at him or raise my voice in the littlest bit
he gets off the phone
i wish he would just stay and talk to me
instead of avoiding it
i want him so bad and he doesnt even realize or understands what i go through
ever day...
i just randomly start crying.. it hasnt gotten better.. at all.
That would be for me
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izntlifesojuicy
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2005 27 October :: 4.54pm
:: Mood: sore
:: Music: Bruised by Jack's Mannequin
FLASHBACK DAY!
i didnt feel like dressing up tho
today was an ok day
actually it sucked
1st period i had to turn in all this stuff
but 2nd period was sooo much fun. ms stampolia i swear she cracks me up. we did barre to all this 60s and 70s music and shes like "feel the music" and puttin all these shakes and things in our tendu combination it was sooo funnie. it was so much fun. and ms stampolia was wearing this go go girl outfit with the itty bitty dress and white boots and fake eyelashes and that like light light lipglosss. so cute. i got pictures. sometimes i cannot stand her when im in a bad mood. but i love her. i couldnt get over how funnie she was being put all these shimmies and things in our barre combinations. and then in the center we did dances to ymca and i will survive and then baby got back ahhh funnie stuff. <3
in lunch mario brought in a stereo playing all this 90s music. he was dressed up as flava flav. it was hilarious when he started dancing. and me and lindsey could stop stop laughing at this one girls costume. ahhh
3rd peiod ms sides subbed for saltmarsh and we had a quiz of 5 questions and i didnt write anything for 3 of them. i just didnt feel like it.
4th period ms luna wrote my name down for a refferal cuz i was talking when she said not to but i dont knoe if shes actually giving me one or not. i fell asleep at the end of class.
im tired i think i might take a nap
and wait for him to call me back...
<3
That would be for me
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izntlifesojuicy
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2005 27 October :: 4.14pm
:: Music: Falllen by Sarah McLachlan
"you'll remember him for the rest of your life"
That would be for me
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izntlifesojuicy
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2005 26 October :: 8.15pm
:: Music: Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap
lyrics from the song we're doing lindseys dance to...its sweet
Where are we?
What the hell is going on?
The dust has only just began to form
Crop circles in the carpet
Sinking, feeling
Spin me around again
And rub my eyes
This can't be happening
When busy streets
Amess with people
Would stop to hold
Their heads heavy
Hide and seek
Trains and sewing machines
All those years
They were here first
Oily marks appear on walls
Where pleasure moments hung before
The takeover
The sweeping insensitivity of this still life
Hide and Seek
Trains and sewing machines (you won't catch me around here)
Blood and Tears
They were here first
Hmm, what'd you say, mmm, that you only meant well?
Well, of course you did.
Hmm, what'd you say? mmm, that it's all for the best?
Of course it is.
Hmm, what'd you say? mmm, that it's just what we need
You decided this?
Hmm, what'd you say, mmm, what did she say?
Ransom notes keep falling out your mouth
Mid-sweet talk, newspaper word cut-outs
Speak no feeling, no I don't believe you
You don't care a bit, you don't care a bit
(Hide and Seek)
Ransom notes keep falling out your mouth
Mid-sweet talk, newspaper word cut-outs
(Hide and Seek)[carries on through rest of song]
Speak no feeling, I don't believe you
You don't care a bit, you don't care a, you don't care a bit
Oh no, You don't care a bit
You don't care a bit
That would be for me
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izntlifesojuicy
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2005 26 October :: 5.49pm
:: Music: Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap
so
idontknoe
what
tothinkanymore
That would be for me
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izntlifesojuicy
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2005 26 October :: 5.22pm
:: Mood: crappy
:: Music: Ghost of You by My Chemical Romance
i love that song
PAJAMA DAY!
woop woop i was so comfy and loving it.
i made a booboo tho i left my blue teddy bear in the dance studio... i hope to god its there tomorrow... i was just out of it today. well actually ive been out of it for the past couple weeks. my mind has been other places i suppose.
i thought i was going to die in dance today we did pilates with ms sides
and all these damn repitiions i swear ive never been in so much pain. i was like are you serious. i dont like her anymore. and it didnt help i started my period this morning and im all achy as it is.
i think i pulled a tendon in my hip. it hurts so bad.
and ive been shaking all day
im going to be so sore tomorrow.
so im officially lost in physics. all these different forces are confusing the hell out of me. im so overwhelmed
and i have english homework up to wazzoo. i hate english.
me and my mom got into the hugest fight yesterday and it all started yesterday when i cut somebody off on accident when i was driving cuz i didnt see them coming. and i was like ok i wont do it again ill be more careful. but she just went on bitching and bitching and i was like i really dont want to hearit but she kept going on and on saying i cant drive by myself when i get my liscense and now i cant do anything this weekend so i pulled in the driveway and stormed out of the car and she said " i hope you knoe you're helping me with the groceries" andi said " no im not" and i stormed in the house and i guess i didnt close the door all the way cuz the dog ran out and i was going to go out there and help her with the groceries but she came in and hold me i was grounded and shes disconnecting my phone. so then i was no ah ah. and she said she wouldnt give me my money in the bank and she was being so immature over the stupidest stuff. so for the rest of the evening she went around calling me names and calling my dad to complain and she said my attitude is "out of control". so yeah and she unplugged the house phone and took away my cell phone and ryan sent me a text message saying she called him and told him i couldnt talk or see him for awhile but then my dad said the wasnt true. and im so fed up with her shit she makes a big deal over the stupidest shit and she is so ridiculous. i told my dad i was going to go to my guidance counselor and show her the bruise on my arm that my mom gave me when she punched me last week.
and she doesnt even think anything of it. like it didnt affect me at all.
whatever
i cant take this anymore.
<3
That would be for me
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izntlifesojuicy
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2005 23 October :: 8.05pm
:: Mood: blah
:: Music: Fix You by Coldplay
When you try your best, but you don't succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse
When the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
High up above or down below
When you too in love to let it go
If you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I...
Tears stream down on your face
I promise you I will learn from the mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I...
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
That would be for me
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izntlifesojuicy
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2005 23 October :: 7.14pm
:: Mood: crappy
:: Music: Goin' Crazy by Natalie
it's the worst feeling when he doesnt call...
That would be for me
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izntlifesojuicy
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2005 23 October :: 3.34pm
:: Music: Teary Eyed by Missy Elliot
~*~ QuOtE oF tHe DaY ~*~
"I woke up early this morning around 4am
With the moon shining bright as headlights on the interstate
I pulled the covers over my head and tried to catch some sleep
But thoughts of us kept keeping me awake"
-- Keith Urban
so i never stop thinking of you
i cant concentrate
i cant sleep
and i dont knoe what im doing wrong
but
im sorry
cuz you dont seem like you wanna talk to me anymore
<3
That would be for me
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izntlifesojuicy
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2005 20 October :: 9.45pm
:: Music: November by Azure Ray
i thought i was doing good you knoe
i hadnt cried over him for a couple days
and then last night came
and today followed.
That would be for me
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izntlifesojuicy
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2005 18 October :: 4.14pm
:: Mood: blah
:: Music: Falling Away With You by Muse
are you kidding me... i cant get away from this fourteen thing
every time i seem to glance at a clock or my eyes wander over to a clock its fourteen minutes past.
and get this i even had a ddrreeaamm about the number fourteen
it was craziness.
yeah so yesterday was ok. i was in a rly good mood until my mom started bitching and we got into a huge fight and she said and did some not so nice things and i was bawling..
and then i called aj and asked him to take me to ryans house cuz i didnt knoe where else to go and i felt most comfortable there because ryans mom is really good with stuff like that. but apparently he didnt hear me say thank you.. ALTHOUGH if i do remember correctly... and i always do ( the small amount of things i can remember) i said thank you quite clearly. and i remember making a point of saying thank you. but he said i didnt.. and then he told somebody he was hurt or something that i asked him to take me there or whatever and i was like um ok he could have said something. so im not on good terms with him right now but i will surely get over it by the time the day is over.
anyways at ryan's house we watched crash with his mom and it was sooo good and soooo sad. i was like bawling. i didnt want to talk about what happened with my mom at first but i did eventually.. briefly.. and yeah
but i felt better and my dad picked me a lil before 9 and we got taco bell. yummmyyyy.
my arm still hurts tho
today was an ok day. it actually wasnt bad at all. i would say a relatively good day.
tomorrow is dress rehearsal
and KAYLAS 17th BIRTHDAYYYYYY!!!!!
woopwoop
thursday and friday are childrens concert
friday i might go to stanton's home coming game after the concert
and saturday is the homecoming dance
i hope its fun
<3
That would be for me
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izntlifesojuicy
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2005 14 October :: 2.46pm
:: Mood: sick
:: Music: Stars by Switchfoot
~*~ QuOtE oF tHe DaY ~*~
"Maybe I've been the problem
Maybe I'm the one to blame
But even when I turn it off and blame myself
The outcome feels the same"
-- Switchfoot
welll ive done nothing all day
the only accomplishment i made was taking a shower
and i must say it was delicious. i really needed it.
i really reallly really wanna go to the beach
and its hard to look at the calender
happy fourteenth...
That would be for me
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izntlifesojuicy
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2005 13 October :: 4.14pm
:: Mood: ohkay
:: Music: Tisbury Lane by Mae
~*~ QuOtE oF tHe DaY ~*~
"Remembering, everything,
about my world and when you came.
Wondering, the change you’d bring,
means nothing else would be the same.
Did you know, what you were doing, did you know.
Did you know how you would move me well,
I don’t really think so."
--Mae
ok well my day was ohkay
but it did have its icky moments...
i'm still sick from like 2 weeks ago i guess i never really got better and its super annoying. my throat hurts all the time and i have a major headache like 24/7
yesterday was a super pretty day. it feels like fall and i'm excited because its my favorite season. except i dunno it can make me sad sometimes...
i havent told my mom about ryan and i dont plan on it because i'll get really upset if i talk about it.. and well ive gotten to the point where i only cry once a day instead of like a million times...like i was earlier this week and over last weekend. so yeah...
i dunno what to do...
i really need to find something tomorrow or im going to like kill myself.
if i dont find something to do tomorrow ill like die... especially cuz of well.. what it is.
i wanted to go out to eat with ryan just because but he said it would make him sad and well i guess it wouldnt be right to make him sad just so i can get what i want.
i have this stupid english project to do this weekend and i knoe im going to put it off as long as i can. but i guess thats ok because im not going to orlando with and his mom anymore on sunday cuz he'll be sad. and yeah.. im disappointed but its my fault anyway.
children's concert is next week so im going to be ooberly busy. and wednesday is kayla's 17th birthday woop wooop.
homecoming is saturday night and the game is friday night but i cant go i have childrens concert
and our peice is a mess
and i have to wear a bright YELLOW UNITARD
im going to die
waitin on that plane...
<3
That would be for me
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