i am invincible, as long as i'm alive...
i don't think the way my head is spinning is natural... its never done this before. when i focus on the screen as i type, my vision blurs and shifts from left to right voluntarily. i feel like i'm shaking my head really really fast, but all i'm moving in my fingertips. "4 more exits to my apartment but i am tempted to keep the car and drive... and leave it all behind"
anyway.. i went to the library today with elyse and katie but lowell just "happened" to be there also working on the infamous World History project thats due next week. we talked for 20 minutes and he had to go... but something was definately missing.. i couldn't quite tell what it was, but its definately not there anymore.
what the hell is wrong with my head?

crawl on out
"the tv is your windowpane... it won't let you down..." but i will.
this is wierd. i feel like i'm writing an email, but everyone can see it.. i'm trying to bang something out to see how it feels, but running on 3 hours of sleep -on a hard floor at that- isn't helping the brain or the body.
but rain is on the mind... lots of rain last night here. DOWNPOUR of rain. a monsoon of warm droplets.. we got on our swimsuits and ran and danced and yelled and slid and skipped and laid and talked in the rain..and i only thought about L maybe once or twice. he stopped by but like always we looked at each other without words and he talked to lisa and i changed into dry clothes and when i came back, he was gone. but i wasn't as disappointed as i thought i would have been.
i was busy being into donny anyway.