well

i talked to fragetti and my other and some of the other members of my {DS} family and they said to just let it go...so thats what im gonna do, its a new chance at whatever it was i was doing before, so on that note, im cancelling anything that costs a monthly fee...yes that means WoW...i dont need that, and since i broke up w/ liz i dont really have a desire to play it, as long as i have UT and BF2 who cares right? as far as liz goes, yeah it would be great to get back together, and its still hard for me to write this, but like she said, there aint much hope and i can accept that. i have no idea WHY there wouldnt be much hope since she didnt tell me, but hey, whats her business is her business. as for now i dont want to be around anyone. i need to figure some shit out on my own, and i dont know how long that can take, but i guess ill start be getting rid of some excess baggage and things i dont use. prolly the paintball guns and the SHO, plus the computer i get back from liz. im sure there is some other useless shit i have, but i cant think of it now. i start school in january, which will be another chance to fix some of the mistakes i made in the past, which brings me to another thing, lying...that shit i gotta stop...i mean WTH...look what it did to liz, who i care about so much, what was i thinking, lying to her that whole time was NOT worth ruining what was once a GREAT relationship for me to model any futher ones on that i will have in my life. i just have to find the right person, that is to say, hope they come back around. so kelly...you got a wing man lol. come lanwar...wooo....*cough*

anyways, to make a long story short, i would like to thank you, for making me step back and take a look at my life, i now realize what a fool i was, i only hope that i can take advantage of this in the future. and NO this does NOT mean that i still dont love you lizzy, i always will, but my walls are up, and thicker then ever


edited for clarification

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