Oh yeah, I got my Hep A and Tetnaus vaccines today. I still gotta decide if I want to get the typoid shot or not. What sucks is you have to bring a parent along with you to the health deparment!

This band-aid on my arm makes me feel like a drug addict...but I gave blood today (first time). When I went in there, they gave everyone all this info to read, then I filled out some health questionaire, and had my blood tested and blood pressure taken. (They have to prick your finger - which stung a little). Next, they directed me to one of the folding lawn chairs that they had set up where the doctor disinfected my skin and stuck the needle/thing into my vein. I don't have any fear of needles, but I didn't watch the doctor stick this thing in my arm; it looked too big. Besides my hands being cold (well, they were cold to begin with), it didn't hurt and it was weird to see my blood pouring into the bag. Since it was my first time and all, I had to lie down while all of this was going on, then I had to slowly (very slowly) sit up and stand. They even made me stay 15 mins to eat something and make sure i was okay. Overall, it was a good experience, and the only pain I had afterwards was where they inserted the needle; it felt like that section of my arm was asleep or had been hit. The other event of my day was registering for my class at Muskegon Community College. I'm going to take Business Intro on monday nights (I'll probably have to miss two classes for my china trip). And the second semester I think I'll take Cinema Studies and possibly German 101...or Spanish. We'll see...

Tonight I told my mom that she truly was a blonde! We were at blockbuster and she was introducing me to one of the managers so that I could ask about their job opening. He was going to go put my application at the top of the pile or something when my mom said "His name is Justin, Justin Burt." The guy replies, "Well, yeah, same last name..." (My mom is a frequent customer there, and it seems that all the employees know her by name) And my mom, being the ditzy person she is, asks "YOU have the SAME last name!?!" Wow, mom...wow.

Feeling dehydrated, I came to conciousness at 3:22 this morning and couldn't fall back asleep, so here I am. Lately, I've been questioning my faith. It's hard to decribe, but I feel like I don't have faith, I just believe, just because this is what I've grown up with, this is what I've been told is the "truth." I don't pray as often as I used to. But if you ask God to talk to you, or to give you a sign, how do you not become paranoid that anything and everything might be that sign? When I signed on a few minutes ago, I had a new e-mail with the subject "Faith." Does that mean anything? After reading it, I don't think it does. (It was just an e-mail regarding summer reading, which is about...faith). I don't know what the answers are, but I think we have to at least have something to believe in. If not, life would be pretty sad, don't you think?

Where have I been these past few days? It seems like only yesterday that I got back from new york, and yet, the end of the month approaches swiftly. I don't want july to succeed to august, because that means school is only a breath away (excuse the poeticness - reading Barbra Kingsolver can do that to you). I've basically been up all night - with the exception of 20 mins of sleep - but now I don't want to bother going to bed. I need things to do before I become a permenant couch potato.

I think i started this thing a little over a year ago, and last night i read EVERYTHING. Not exactly how I remembered the last year, lol. Well I don't know where andre was tonight, but emily and I hung out.

I'm sitting here, burning up, and I really don't have anything to say. I just felt like writing. I'm listening to "Island in the Sun" and pondering its philosphical meaning. There are at least a hundred more productive things I could be doing, but I have neither the energy nor the motivation to do them. At least I found out about vaccine's today. I am planning to travel to China this fall and I have to get a few extra shots. I've decided to give blood next week at the local blood drive. If anyone in Muskegon is at least 17, you should go down there! Well, I'm off to go do absolutely nothing productive.

The Gerbil passed away early this morning, after a night of stillness and convulsions. Let us pay our respects: I, for one, will miss the way he kept me up at night, spinning around and around his little wheel.

In better news, I went to a picture party tonight for the Europe Trip. I found a few pictures that might look good for yearbook. But, if I write the story, I don't know what I will write about.

I still gotta call the Department of Health and obtain my school transcripts...

I must admit, not a very challenging day, but accomplishing to say the least. I got all my "Thank You" notes written and most of them sent out, including one to the councelor at Fordham. I went to Meijer's where I saw Mrs. Biezska and Mrs. Charron and printed my NY pictures. And I am finally on the last chapter of my first book! It's actually a really good book! Tonight I chatted with St. Joesph's College of Indiana online. I know how much the students there love it and how much the councelors brag about it, but I don't want to go there. They have less than 1000 students and the average GPA is 2.8 amoung the entering freshmen class! I'd rather go somewhere where I have a good chance of getting in and good chance of not getting in...like NYU! Now that's a toss-up for me. Well I'm going to go hopefully finish my book...

this is my life
its not what it was before
all these feelings i've shared
and these are my dreams
that i'd never lived before
somebody shake me
cuz i
i must be sleeping

[chorus]
now that we're here,
it's so far away
all the struggle we thought was in vain
all in the mistakes,
one life contained
they all finally start to go away
now that we're here its so far away
and i feel like i can face the day i can forgive
and i'm not ashambed to be the person that i am today

these are my words
that i've never said before
i think i'm doing okay
and this is the smile
that i've never shown before

somebody shake me cuz i
i must be sleeping

[chorus]

i'm so afraid of waking
please don't shake me
afraid of waking
please don't shake me

I think I feel more alive than I have felt in a long time. It's the same feeling as when everything is made clear to someone. Only, I don't think everything is clear, but it seems like everything will work out, somehow. In addition, I got good news, but all I can say is that I might go to China this fall.

"lets go"...watch a music video once and you get the song stuck in your head! NY was a good experience. I had my first college interview and I got to see what some of these colleges are really like. I've now decided that I want to attend New York University, so I will be establishing the Justin Burt NYU $40,000-per-year College Fund. Please Donate ; ) In related news, I saw Niagra Falls and went through Canada for the first time. I'm tired, so I'll write more later.

I was at Meijer's tonight and they're already starting to stock their back-to-school merchandise. That's scary. Our school requires summer reading every year. For AP Lit, I have to read two novels: A Prayer for Owen Meany and The Poisonwood Bible. Well, I'm halfway through A Prayer for Owen Meany. It's taken me many, many hours, which is sad. It's 600 pages, but the print is tiny and I'm a slow reader. The hardest part, however, is the responses we have to write for each chapter. Luckily, I got chapters 1-5 taken care of tonight. I have a feeling that some people didn't like the fact that I stayed home doing my summer reading, but I've been putting it off for too long. I NEEDED to do it. Hopefully I'll get the rest of it finished by Sunday so that I can start the other book on the way to New York (we leave Tuesday and will be back Saturday). I still haven't heard from Fordham regarding a visitation...