and this is what I call life...

:: 2005 22 April :: 8.11am
:: Music: Bright Eyes-- First day of my life

oh yeah, this is me biting my tounge.

*you f*ing dillhole*

:: 2005 22 April :: 7.43am

so yeah, i am in journalism. liz and i are drinking a friggin awesome strawberry banana smoothie. yummmmm.
my hair is nice and strait, whoot. so it is down. whoot, no more pony tails!!

2 burns | Do you want to play with fire?

:: 2005 21 April :: 7.21pm
:: Music: Bright Eyes

so after school lisa asked me to go look at prom dresses with her and we had a good time on the 'road trip to rogers'
i feel aweful because i smoked but only because i am not a fan of smoking and i did it just because i was stressed out from the traffic. other than that lisa got this really awesome burgundy dress for like 70 bucks, because i made her try it on and she liked it, plus it was in the price range. my only problem is that i no longer have enough money to get my nails done (shit!) and my mom had given me like 60 bucks to use towards my hair and nails, that i used so i could eat. so i either need to beg crystal to loan me some money or cancel my nail appt, and stress about how i am going to get gas money..
(jenny wanna do a 'drug run') haha just kidding. anyways i am really glad that i got to know lisa a little better and i am happy because tanya and amanda said that i am the most oppinionated girl they know. lol, that makes me giddy.

love ya'll. --josie

:: 2005 21 April :: 11.34am

hm...just when i figure out he is just an ass...and that when i drive by his road now...i dont even think about him...when i haven't talked about him in days....he calls and wants to hang out....twice. god damnet....weston fucking called me and said he missed me. needless to say how hard it was to tell him i never wanted to hang out with him again. all he said was...you never want to hang out with me again?....thats all you had to say. good night.

:: 2005 21 April :: 7.52am
:: Mood: calm
:: Music: Kelly Clarkston- Since you've been gone

is it wrong for me to be so damn cynical about everything with him, i read things... and i get worried and then i read more and i am like.... what an effing loser. idk, it's sort of indecisive. i still kind of like him, but i see so many things in him that i hate and it makes me want to put him in a box and send him to istanbul. lol.
wow, anyways. according to H, I never have a boring day, because every day i have a new story. like today (note that i have hardly been awake for an hour) i didn't have the jeans i was going to wear in my house, so i wore my pajama pants to school and changed in the car. And yesterday, jamie and kat pantsed me in the freshman hall. ah buddy. life just keeps going.
i can't wait till prom next week, i just hope i find a date....

2 burns | Do you want to play with fire?

:: 2005 20 April :: 12.05pm

CANT WAIT FOR MY SHOWER TOMORROW! IM SO EXCITED! LOL

unbleachedblond

:: 2005 20 April :: 8.24am

oyea - another random comment. as most of you know, there is a new pope. has anyone noticed that he has an uncanny resemblence to uncle fester?

1 burn | Do you want to play with fire?

unbleachedblond

:: 2005 20 April :: 8.06am
:: Mood: somewhat tired, but otherwise chipper
:: Music: damn circus song

reflections
i decided that me and peter are extremely good for each other. he is helping me with my downfalls. hes convinced that he can turn me into a better person. now that can be viewed negatively i suppose, but it offers me some hope. my self respect is increasing as is my self esteem. ive given up drinking. my nicotine intake is slowly dwindling. and when i get my license back, i decided that im going to actually attempt to drive between my designated hours. i only need about 50 more credit hours before i can become a probie officer and keep other delinquents in line. my life is shaping up. it's a nice change.

65 days till i have the opportunity to bless the roads with my wonderful driving!

hailey is the most beautiful girl in the whole wide world...and i might get to meet her joel today!

jessa - when are you due?

granted everyone should care about how they physically look, but i decided that im not going to really care much anymore. i will continue to shower and such, its jus the whole weight issue that really bugs me about girls. they think that theyre way to frickin fat, regardless how anorexically thin they are. we stay warm in the winter - there's nothing wrong with that.

today is 4/20. this has absolutely no meaning to me anymore. it just reminds me of the stupidity of my younger years.

i dont have class for another 5 hours so i think im gunna go back to sleep. nite kids.

:: 2005 19 April :: 12.14pm

my dear friend josh wanted me to write an entry for his behalf. ....
so here it goes....

we are going to skip part of our class to go get slurpies. im so excited. hes mad right now cause i wouldnt let him read something. oh well. hes my buddy!

ode to joshy woshy

joshy woshy is so foxie
all the girls fall down
then with the lift from the corner of his lip
well present him with his crown
a crown of simple purity even though he can be quite a dick
it doesnt matter with joshy woshy cause no one will forget
that joshy woshy is a kooala bear and can love you when he wants
too bad right now im on the wrong side i do haunt.
angry joshy woshy is not fun to me
but knowing that one day he'll care
makes me yell yipeeeeeeeeee!

with lots of love joshy
~casey

:: 2005 19 April :: 12.08pm

really corny poem...sorry
if only he could realize how great we would be.
if only he would realize that person hes searching for is me
the one person who would do whatever for him is me
the one person that really cares about him is me
the one person that will wait for him is me
hoping one day he realizes the person hes waiting for is me.

:: 2005 18 April :: 12.05pm
:: Music: varsity

when i want one the one that once was wants me
muskegon tom called me while i was at work last night about 10 pm and asked if i had any plans...i said why...he said im about two minutes away from your house.....AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! i was supposed to go over to jasons and we were going to watch a movie. tom had even called my mom to make sure it was okay that he came over to surprise me....so i had to tell jason that i couldnt go there. i dont know he was fine about it and then asked me who this tom was. and then he said i was ditching him...again....although i really dont remember when else i did it. so tom and i hung out lastnight...i told him about jason. how i like him but how he just wants to be friends. i fell asleep and druled on his chest and snored really loud....lol.. him comming over just made me realize how much more i like jason. wow. i was so concerned.....about it. he called me around 12:30 and asked if tom was still there. he was. so i was talking to jason on the phone while sitting next to tom. jason knew he was right next to me and kept asking me if i wanted to make out with him....so tom would hear me say yes. in a way i felt as though jason was testing me....i dont know. so this mornign i went to jasons before school and we watched a movie together....yup and ....yup...still didnt work.....im getting hopeless. i like him sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo MUCH!

2 burns | Do you want to play with fire?

Fatman

:: 2005 18 April :: 12.39am

Did you see that?

:: 2005 17 April :: 10.21pm

i can't breathe, baby.
i feel all bruised up, my lungs are compressed. i can't breathe.
my heart keeps randomly skipping beats or racing. i'm not in love, so i just don't understand. my stomach hurts when i eat.
i am going to the doctors next month, after prom so i have extra money. i hope i can be okay till then, if not.... i will have to push my cash and make it work

in other news, my birthday was friday.... so here is what i got!
50 cent- Massacre (from Dennis)
Garden State Soundtrack
20$ towards a movie (from aunt dee)
smothie machine
20$ (for prom??)
lotsa hugs
some cards
and my uncles somehow (cough *dad* cough) got my cell # and called to wish me happey birthday

ironicly enough, nobody from my mom's family has called and wished me a happy birthday, or sent a card. with the exception of my grandma.
go figure.
love ya'll-- Josie

1 burn | Do you want to play with fire?

jus4fun06

:: 2005 15 April :: 9.34am

i can only feel him drifting away. i hope its not my imagination. maybe it is only paranoia getting the best of me. its only changed in the past two weeks. one week:: it was good... many phonecalls || barely talk... not even when we do call eachother :: next week. i cant understand what happened between us. is it something i did?