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yeah i'm crazy but i get the job done.

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.j.e.s.s.

:: 2011 23 May :: 10.59pm

having surgery on wednesday. hoping it is for good reason.

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


tuwang

:: 2011 18 May :: 12.49pm

I need you're opinion on this...

so I go out for a friends birthday, meet up with a bunch of people from work at our hangout pub. As the night wraps up, a girl from work (who I would kill for to get with) invites me to the after party for some more drinks and drink compliments.

Long story short, as we are all going to pass out this girl (now thoroughly intoxicated i.e. deal breaker) wakes my ass up and asks me to go outside to have a cigarette with her (I still don't smoke and I wasn't cigarette drunk either). I go with her outside of this dorm that requires a keycard for entry at the University of Maryland when she of course notices that she forgot a lighter. She head back upstairs to find it and leaves me outside with no shoes. Its raining. She doesn't come back.

So there I am, in a place infested with police patrolling for drunk college kids who just graduated, with no shoes, in the rain, with no fucking clue where I am.

lucky for me she gave me her iPhone before heading back upstairs, which I used to navigate my way out. Doesn't mean I didn't have to walk around campus in socks while it was raining looking for the parking lot I parked my car in.

So now I have a new iPhone and a pack of menthols (If I DID smoke, I would not smoke menthols).

Ok so, I went to hang out with her because I think she's cute. I didn't try and make a move or anything, but I did put myself in the situation.

On a scale of 1-10 how angry am I allowed to be?

10 feet on the ground. | Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


tuwang

:: 2011 17 May :: 12.51pm

they call me menopause the way I make my heat flash

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


tuwang

:: 2011 8 May :: 2.09am

to you... you know who you are (chris)

3 feet on the ground. | Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


tuwang

:: 2011 6 May :: 3.30pm

c'mon homie, we major!

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


mbenznut

:: 2011 1 May :: 10.35pm

John Hancock is a real person? I thought it was a sex act.

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


mbenznut

:: 2011 1 May :: 9.23pm

After you clean the pool, I am going to shave every inch of you.

Ugh, that is not a classy toast.

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


mbenznut

:: 2011 28 April :: 8.14pm

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


mbenznut

:: 2011 25 April :: 11.07pm

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


mbenznut

:: 2011 21 April :: 3.28pm



I'll take Cody.

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


mbenznut

:: 2011 20 April :: 12.16pm

I have a question, are you single?

I'm not gay.

I don't care. You're hunky and I'm what they call predatory gay.

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


mbenznut

:: 2011 19 April :: 7.57am

You are a strawberry blonde. You can't go out with an ash blonde, it wouldn't be right.

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


upchuck

:: 2011 12 April :: 7.09am

Several new posts from some old friends. It's nice to see that everyone is unsure about thier lives. Who knew we would all be dealing with such "adult" issues nigh on ten years ago.

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


tuwang

:: 2011 6 April :: 3.25pm

It's nice out... but it's still cold in this house. WTF.

I hate old people.

I want a "real" job.

2 feet on the ground. | Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


mbenznut

:: 2011 28 March :: 2.58am

Heteroflexible: Straight, but shit happens.

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


mbenznut

:: 2011 22 March :: 11.16pm

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


mbenznut

:: 2011 19 March :: 1.42pm

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


mbenznut

:: 2011 2 March :: 10.43pm

Butt sex is a lot like spinach. If you're forced to have it as a child, you won't enjoy it as an adult.

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


mbenznut

:: 2011 20 February :: 9.38pm

Yo mamas so fat she got cheats for Wii Fit.

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


.j.e.s.s.

:: 2011 4 February :: 11.30pm

I feel lost like theres no real fit for me completely. My whole plan I've had my entire life may never pan out and so I'm just living day by day wondering if my life plan will ever come true.

I was so sure my whole life that I never once questioned it. Now who knows.

I also feel taken advantage of and under appreciated.

And maybe related, maybe not, I've been so paranoid lately it's unbearable. Especially when driving,i feel like I'm going to get in an accident at least once a minute. If someones following too close or hits the brakes too suddenly my whole body tenses up. Car wrecks play in my head the whole drive and I pull on my seat belt to tighten it throughout the drive. At night i feel like someone is in my back seat, which I've always checked for but usually just once, at the beginning of the drive, not 4 times throughout, turning on the light to check and even feeling like I feel someone breathing on my neck from the back seat.
I'm having a harder and harder time getting up during the night to pee or let the dogs out without being power petrified that my nightmare about the man behind my shower curtain trying to kill me isn't real. I can't open the curtain to check bc I'm so sure hes there.
These new developments on top of the always present anxiety and stomach upset every morning before work thats been going on for 8 months makes my life a lotta fun right now.

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


mbenznut

:: 2011 25 January :: 11.13pm

1 feet on the ground | Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


tuwang

:: 2011 14 January :: 4.34pm

this weekend will be the 6th weekend in a row Ive gone out all night and come home on the first train in the morning. Im not entirely sure how I feel about that.

I had a dream last night that I went to a bar with my friend Benedict. I paid 2000 yen at the door, got my wristband and two tickets, and entered. When I got in, a fat lady with a poorly shaped bob haircut and thick horn-rimmed glasses stops me and asks me for proof that I had paid. I show her my wristband but she says, `that proves nothing`. I pull out one of the two tickets I had and I get the same response, followed by the other only to yet again hear how useless it is. She starts chuckling and I say, `what do I have to do to prove to you that I paid?`. She grins and replies `Tim should have given you what you need.`
`Then Ill go find time`
`Tim wont give it to you now, Im sure`
She is laughing hysterically and Im getting incredibly frustrated at this point. I start cursing in Japanese, to which she responds with laughter.
`Its no use really` she says and continues laughing, her belly jiggling rythmycally.

Its then that I pull out a Colt .357, cock it, aim at her face, and pull the trigger. I hear nothing but see a flash of white, at which point I wake up in a cold sweat.

what does this mean?

For a reality update, Im still alive. Thats nice yeah?

2 feet on the ground. | Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


mbenznut

:: 2011 13 January :: 8.11pm

"I haven't seen a basket that impressive since the one on Red Riding Hood's arm."

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


tuwang

:: 2011 6 January :: 9.12am

back then they didnt want me, now Im hot they all up on me.

I wish it were easier to make apostrophes on this keyboard.

Bitches need to learn to take a joke, especially when the implied meaning isnt inately evil by any means.

my three thoughts for today.

Akemashite Omedetougozaimasu.

2 feet on the ground. | Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.


mbenznut

:: 2011 1 January :: 8.34am

RELIGION IS LIKE A PENIS

It's fine to have one.
It's fine to be proud of it.
But please don't whip it out in public and start waving it around.
And please don't try to shove it down my children's throats.

Go ahead, you can laugh all you want.

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