::
2004 8 December :: 4.07 pm
:: Mood: angry/sad/defeated
i am so fuckin pissed off. so the other day i looked in my bag cause i thought my journal was in there, but it wasnt. i thought i had simply took it out sometime and didnt remember it. i soon forgot about it. in first i had nate being... well... nate. i heard him say something like, "see, i told you she was a bitch." and "shes obessessed with travis. all she wants is to ride his dick." they were passin somehthing back and forth. amber said, "dont you want to give it back to her?" nate said "no, we were ripping them and burning it last night." i believe it was amber who got up and threw something out. i just assumed they were talking about some old note i wrote to travis, back when. i got to leave class early cause of sectionals. i was pissed, but only at the fact that nate was acting like a dickhead, but it was nothing out of the ordinary. so sectionals was boring and i got out really early. i was waiting in the hall to see shawn and i saw nate and amber walk by me. amber was like, "shes gonna cry." i was like what the m-th-fuck. so i went to class and ignored them. i was all happy and all then i have justin who goes, "danielle, i got this from an anonmous third party... can i give it to you?" i was like sure. so he hands me my journal cover, torn off. i like started to shake and i almosted cried. everyone was like, what is it. i was like, the cover to my diary. i had to take a mother fuckin test. a hard test too. my essay had fragments. i swear. in the test i was bouncin my leg cause i had all this adrenalin in me and i needed to yell at nate. i knew his class was somewhere in the history wing. so i asked to leave and find nate. my teacher went, "what are you gonna do?" i was liek yell at him. so i left and search the classes. i couldnt find him at all. i was like whatever... fuck it. and i went to guidence and told my conciler. he called nate down and nate denyied everything. i knew he took it. i went back to class. my teacher asked me if i got carted down to the principal office cause i was gone so long. i was like no, i went to the guidence office. i went to third. in third i had the brillant plan to dig through the trash cause i remember about how amber threw something out. so when we let out for trash, i went to my sociology room and dug through the trash. at first i thought it wasnt there but then i found it. i marched to guidence and gave it to mr. mckinley. he said somethign how i need to write a statement. i didnt do that yet. i went to lunch and told my lunch table and carrie made me go to the office to report nate and travis for harassment. i did and i had to write everythign down. im awful at writing things. id rather say them. then the secretary in there had the nerve to tell me i was up to somethign all cause i happen to know tyler and he was movin closer. she said, "its a coudince(sp???) that you come down while hes here." meanwhile im like all upset. half crying. half shaking. ready to beat nates ass and she tells me im up to somehting. that was the first time in like 2 years since i went to the principal's office. motha truckers. then dr. donely yelled at carrie for stayin with me. she was helping me by being there and he yelled at her to leave and said she was skipping class. i cant stand this school. after third i marched up to nate and flipped out on him. well, course im not any good at flipping out so i liek said the same thing over and over again, "nate, how could you do this to me," while im like bawling my eyes out. nate, in his gay ass pink shirt just said, "step the fuck back bitch. im not afraid to choke a bitch" i just kept screaming at him. then i pushed him and ran away. i was amber hess staring at me. i saw all the mother fuckin hoes staring at me. i couldnt take it. i cant believe he would go and do that. then all these people inform me that they recall nate or travis talking and/or seeing a book of mine. thanks for the help guys. i remember that yesterday nate said something about "gonna get it" and amber asked what. and he was liek, "youll see." how could he do that??? and this past summer he came over i was like protect me. he said, from what? i was like everyone who tries to hurt me. he was like, i wont let anyone hurt you. now this.
sweet words |
