rina
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2006 9 December :: 10.56pm
:: Mood: perfect
:: Music: gorecki - lamb
if i should die this very moment, i wouldn't fear
i feel the most free when i am covered in paint.
especially when it is in the most impossible places:
behind my right ear, on the soft skin under my knee, the uneven edge of my tooth.
sweet words
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rina
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2006 27 November :: 12.01am
:: Mood: calm
:: Music: summer in the city - regina spektor
vanity, not love, has been my folly.
five things you may or may not know about me;
01. whenever i sneeze, i automatically think of the way chlorine smells, and sometimes its so overwhelming it feels as if i've swallowed pool water.
02. every time i read the book pride and prejudice by jane austen, it gets continually harder and harder for me to put down. this is accompanied by an irrational happiness and a warmth that radiates from my chest.
03. being involved in the doctor who/torchwood fandom is more important to me than schoolwork. i wish this weren't true, but i honestly put off all my ap euro so i could sit and start my own tw comm, the torchwood music project.
04. my preference in company changes according to how well i fake happiness in my first class of the day. if it goes over well, i end up having a decent day despite the work load. if someone sees through it, i remain detatched and hardly speak to anyone for the rest of the day.
05. i keep an entire folder of internet bookmarks entitled 'things that make me feel awesome.' these are random occurences throughout the internet in which i am either mentioned in a pleasant way, praised for something i've done (mostly having to do with art/writing), or contains information of any kind about the carina nebula.
1 whisper |
sweet words
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rina
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2006 13 November :: 10.20pm
:: Mood: infuriated
a;sldk
fuck.
i have this seething rage sitting inside my chest, and its traveling up my throat, waiting for some kind of sound to follow it out into the air.
i don't even have words to describe it. its just this hot, angry thing taking residence within me and i want to fucking tear someone's eyes out.
everything i make comes out distorted and disgusting. i have some sort of cancer thats killing anything i come into contact with.
ASDLKFJZXCIWfSDFJLASD245CMKASROIFOJAISDMFLASD.
1 whisper |
sweet words
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rina
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2006 17 October :: 12.26am
:: Mood: hurt
:: Music: the shape of things - bear mccreary
when the bad moon in your heart sings
i am losing a tooth, and the way it pushes through my gums, it mostly feels like life. it is a continuous ache, and the pain goes mostly unheeded, but i've discovered that blood is bitter on tongues.
this may or may not account for the preoccupation i've had with mouths as of late. how some of my questions are chased with a nervous laugh or two. how i can feel words kept hidden behind my teeth when i most want them heard. how i might have a fondness of lopsided smiles.
i often find myself feeling used or unoriginal.
i am convinced, however, that the way homemade apple cider warms your chest and tastes like autumn; it is the only way october should be spent.
sweet words
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