:: 2005 14 November :: 7.34 pm
:: Mood: cold

everywhere I go is cold
Busy day today and I dont really feel like doing anything other than laying. Work tomorrow, but not till 2, wish I had something fun and exciting to do tonight. But realistically I've become quite the fuddy duddy and there is nothing to do at age 20 on a monday night anyway. I've been itching to do two things lately, both of which cost money which I'm trying to avoid spending. But I've wanted to go hot tubbing and also play pool. But ooooh well, I will survive. I think I might take a nap today instead then possibly unpack some today and more tomorrow morning. I've decided that when the parents come home from work and they just sit, or they go do something that has nothing to encourage me into working, then I just sit. Even if someone is just downstairs on the computer then I get some motivation to do things. But sitting in the living room does not give me the motivation that I need to do this unpacking thing. But maybe tomorrow...

gimmie a ring

:: 2005 14 November :: 12.09 am

The time is wrong
Today was a crazy day full of weird times. Good wake up though!

gimmie a ring

:: 2005 10 November :: 6.11 pm

It's thursday and there was no update for me to read. :-( that was gonna be the highlight of my day. Blah!

gimmie a ring

:: 2005 6 November :: 5.24 pm

Been packing forever today and I want a break... I should finish studying soon though.. yes I've started already. Both studying and packing should aim to be done by Desprate Housewives time. Thats the goal at least. This studying stuff is tricky. I know the steps to glycolysis and all that good stuff but I get confused sometimes as to what products are formed and when. Glycolysis hasnt been the issue though, its that stupid catabolism anabolism stuff... why cant they only have those names? But noooo sometimes anabolism is called dehydration synthesis and sometimes its not. I think thats what will mess me up on this exam. I just have to take my time and think about what I'm doing. I know the material, just gotta not rush.
Yes this is my most interesting entry yet. hehehe. But it gave me a short break and now I'm ready to dive back into my studyin.
ALSO, if anyone cares to help load boxes into my car tonight I'll be giving out special surprises!

gimmie a ring

:: 2005 2 November :: 10.37 pm

I am in a strange mood as of lately. I dont know exactly what it is or what to call it or how to describe it but its weird. I guess I will try to explain it like this. Most of my days I am with people: classes, work, family, Charlie, friends, etc. But then I come home and thats where this weirdo feeling fits in. It's a mixture of sickness, fear, sarrow (yes sarrow and not just sadness), and complete mellowness. I dont know what it is, or what causes it but I'm not a big fan of this feeling. Especially that fear part. I've been having the worst nightmares lately. Like everynight something bad happens in my dreams. And they are just silly dreams, not my typical nightmares.
See, when I was littler I only had a few select nightmares that repeated themselves. There was the beetlejuice one (still creeped out by that man), the mattress one, and the teacher one. That was it, just those three. Now I have these new ones. And lumberjacks seem to be in all of them. Sometimes, like last night, they were even very nicely dressed lumber jacks. And these new ones I always die. I physically see myself die.
Ever have dreams like that? I haven't, I dont like seeing me die, not something I enjoy at all. And I'm starting to think that these dreams are spilling into my real life. Each morning I wake up alone and have to go to my car. I open the door and walk as quickly as I can to my car where I get in quickly and lock my door quickly. Reverse of that is true when coming home. I always drive with my doors locked incase some lumber jack decides he needs in at a stop sign or red light, etc. It just sucks to have this new feeling of fear to do things and go places.
Yeah so thats what I am going to write about today. You read it, be happy about it, cuz theres prolly no changin it. Although I am going to look up lumberjack in my dream dictionary!

2 messages | gimmie a ring