If you don't want to hurt people, why hurt yourself?
Prepare for a somewhat serious entry, that may or may not apply to you.
=/
I'm excited/anxiously sad. I'm going to that awesome show downtown today, with kae [her first concert :D itll be fun ^^ i hope]. But..

I'm so worried about a few of my friends. You special people who I'm the closest too, who always understand, who give me hugs when I feel sad.. and I do the same for you. It seems like some of the people I know so well are heading in a downwards spiral. >< I'm not going to let anything happen to you.
But, If the people I really depend on to stay strong, and always be there.. start to feel like this*** What if we all break down? No one will be there... just, no one. that can't happen.

stop.
stop hurting yourself.
please?

::looks away::

But why is the RUM gone?!
Yaoh!
Im going to a concert tonight or else! >:D laz' grounded but I think lauren n karen are comming. Yay! Pushmonkey/Human/Powderburn/Empty W00T!

Yesterday I was about to pass out, so right when I started to type I uh.. hehe ^.^; my mom came home at 8 with painkillers. -.-; And I changed a guitar string XD Yeah. Killing In The Name Of is SUCH a KICKASS SONG!! >:) Hehe.

Events of yesterday *HOME*: My mom wanted a copy of my poem that got published for the contest, so after a bit I said FINE.. then she asked me about my other poetry, and I told her that I wanted my [frickin] privacy, and she said that we're a family and that we should "share" and I gave her my best cold, empty eyed look through all this... I'm pretty good at it now, I think =).

Happy science.

¤*`*¤.¤*'*¤
meep!
omg, I have such a headache >.<;
quote self: "I fell off my skateboard."
Haha. XP No, I didn't. But they believe what you tell them =) hehe, idiots.

It's been a sleepy day for everyone =/ I was going to start dance [jazz] at Lauren's place [and magz and kt's] but it turns out I'm sick ^.^; I dunno.. I really want to take an art class. Karen has one on thursdays @.o I wanna go =D

went sk8ing again ^^ it's alright. I can keep my balance, but if only I could STAY ON IT XD it keeps slipping out in front of me. Pretty fun downhill tho. =D

*kicks self* why do I act like everything's fine all the time??! >.<
silly me o.o;

OMFG! Yesterday I won tix to that local show [pushmonkey/human] on 101x [knew all six songs ^_~] and laurel's parents won't fucking let her go! I'm soOo just picking her up. *glares at parents of d00m* -.-

peter steele does have a good voice :D! hehe.

the higher you go, the harder you fall
It's amazing how you can relate to so many songs when you're feeling emotional =)

Just a thought, for a while..

I went skateboarding.. it was actually pretty fun. I can keep my balance [I didn't fAll once] but I can't stay on it unless there's an incline. ^^; it's really cool-looking, though! heh.

I did something pretty stupid <.< I don't know why.. at all. I just can't seem to get my thoughts in order. Everything is scrambled, and even I can't tell what I'm thinking =/ and oh..my...god.. there are no more painkillers at my house XPPPPP! *gah*

fucking pop ups! I just got my computer to work *sorta* >.< *slaps computer*

yeah.. I'm working on a new site btw. I like ofdoom.tk =D

::stares at you with empty eyes::
*~*lost*~*

*bounce* When I move you move, mm just like that--When I move you move, mm just like that-- =DDD
Hey!
School day? Average. It's very very sad tho, cuz I'm behing 10 chapters in TKAM U_U;; and I have an evil B in math =////! I wanna bring it up <.< >.> cuz b's are a bit sucky. Anyway, I won't obsess because grades are useless! >:D

After school, jax and laurel n me hung out, and went to jax' house to "film our commercial" XD [4 theatre] it's about altoids, and another about the shut-up-o-matic. XD we never practiced, and we did this in 5 minutes. XDDD if only we had a theatre class we cared about *sigh* ^.^; Twas fun.

Then Christina drove me to the game, and I had to cheer XPPP but it wasn't so bad. I found out our mascot is all into AFI and plays guitar goodishly =DD fun rummy! AAAA in the middle of the game laurel's parents SWOOPED IN ANGRILY cuz she 4GOT to call them XPXPXP [im so scared for her ='(] so she couldn't go out with us U_U christina took us out to eat, and BAM that was it :D! It was pretty fun ^.^

except, now I have a shitakiload of hw :'(((

Oh well ^.^
love ya
-joolz

>@_@<
Yo
So it's been a weekend.. *sigh* hope you had a happy milk day. Yesh, I'm up -.- I'm learning "killing in the name of" on guitar and it r0x0rz! >:D
my mom is yelling me at for TURNING ON THE HEATER and USING TOO MUCH WATER and GETTING ON THE COMPUTER TOO EARLY

*sigh* This weekend has been very.. "Big." But I've been feeling creative for the past few days, so that's good =D

Umm.. stuff. later.
-j

;_;
Why does that song make me cry every time?

I know.

*sigh* I'm feeling creative. A little speck of happiness, cuz I've sort of put my thoughts in order

I'm drawing and listening to 101x. And having a really long, "intelligent" [as she put it ^.^] conversation with nicole. And drawing stuff for her. *a moon *ocean at night * and for karly, a prima ballerina.
I need to practice guitar tho XP

Wanna see a PICTURE of me?

OK!

HERE
geocities.com/punkyfunko/moi001.BMP i think. try lowercase and gif. and i know its just ok :P but whatever

love, -j

I od-ed on something early this morning, but I don't know what it was. HAHAHA Jk
Yaoh!!

Heyhey, the self i show to other people is pretty damn hyper/happy. My other self, if you'd like to know, is doing alright. Very thoughtful. =D

THIS MESSEGE IS FOR EVERYONE. Never, ever ever turn self destructive. If all else fails.. if you have no one to turn to, no solution.. tell ME, DAMMIT! I can't stand it that so many people around me feel like this... *sigh*

So hey, I had a not so bad day =D was really really hyper... stayed after school with jax and magz ^.^ We're going to a movie tonight w/ kester and emily. =D funness ^.^
Saturday>>> Karly's bday party/Pink Floyd Laser Show [THANX LAUREL!]
Sunday>>>Church [=/?] Lauren/Karen stuff your face and watch movies sleepover
Monday>>>MILK DAY!! Making costumes for ushicon and teaching di trigun! ^.^

Yeah. But there's still a lot on my mind.
*sigh*

Be you.
-j

Hey.
I realize that I'm really good at making people think im ok. Or perfectly happy. I mean, It's always been like this, i guess... No one know anything about me unless I want them too. It's a good thing, right?

I walked home in the rain =) I love the rain. it's so perfect... *~*
I feel SO stupid... UGGH HOW could i be such an IDIOT?! When you ask impossible questions make sure the answer isnt layed out in bright colored flash cards under your nose O.O
XDXPXP *sigh* well, I've been a clutz all week XP dropped my crap, forgot my hw, and when we did that tiny lil kick in the dance while showing the others i actually TRIPPED. It was pretty embarassing. But, the good thing is i learned that I don't care what people think as much anymore. Like when lauren got onto me about going to the anime convention XD People should just let other people have their interests, and get over themselves...

everyone should just get over themselves! >:|
I'm really sorry everyone ^.^ I've been pmsing all day XD I <3 you all... ^_^

Today I will tell you what I HATE and what i LOVE! >:D!

LOVE: Rain, Cloudless sunny skies, my friends!!!!!, music, ART, drawing!!!, french, anime, dancingessism, getting it right on the first try, chocolate, the song "day that I die", the song "one thing", winning stuff, laurel winning stuff and taking ME! >:D *hint hint* [XD laurel won tix to teh pink floyd laser show YAYAAYYAYAYYYY!] a BuNcH of other stuff i cant think of at the moment

HATE: Not getting it on the first try, figuring out something i thought was smart was stupid, TED AND ASHTON those IDIOTS! Oh my GOD! WILL THEY STOP being such ASSHOLES OMFG!, People who think they know it all.. who don't, being judged, negative attitudes, *sigh* a lot of other stuff but, i really try not too =/

IM SO REMAKING MY SITE ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY! >:)!

BYEBYEBYEBYE o.o

"A friend is someone who knows everything about you, and likes you anyway"
yaoh ^.^
im a bit angry/annoyed in the back of my mind, but i had a fun time w/ euni n di n amanda... doing "FRENCH 2" hahaha yeah right we were rambling on about planes and airports and cheese.. XDXDXD It's hilarious. We never learn anything ^.^
Me and diane get along too well XD we never run out of things to say, so when we need to do some serious work we just end up screwed cuz we talked to much XD

AHAHAHA you SHOULD HAVE SEEN what LAUREL WAS WEARING TODAY! OMFG XD Her blackosity hair, a GREEN soccer shirt, a dark plaid skirt, white tights, one knee high striped sock, and those bOwLiNg shoes that give me nightmares. XDXDXD It was HILARIOUS. Yes, I am telling everyone. Because.. it was a sight to see. Yes, she knows I am telling everyone. ahh, qu'@d!

She has yet another site btw. It's in my gb, i think O.@ oh, sorry.. never updated my linx ^.^;

Oh! I taught laurel, jax, and laasya teh F U cheer. Created by me during a gay lil sevvy game ^_~. XD Mrs Baker heard us chanting it loud and clear.. it's great how she didn't even look up

I have a pretty fun --wait-- lets say, pretty "big"-- weekend. =)! school off on milk day ^_^ meh.. changed my mind about listing all teh events. ^.^;

And W00T i get to be Haruko for that convention! W00TOSITY! PINK HAIR! I get to carry around my guitar and bash ppl on teh head [jkjk] because that's haruko's trademark. ^.^

Well.. Today was a pretty good day, I guess. I mean it ended good. I was all irritated during school @.o Thinking Thinking Thinking. It's really weird, cuz now when I wake up at 5am by accident, I can't ever get back to sleep. Because I instantly start thinking. U_U.

Yes, this is a LONG ENTRY.

Doom is looming

\
I was listening to this song on the way home and.. it made me cry. A little. I remember I was listening to it.. two sundays ago. It made me moody.

It's so my fave song now ^.^

"Restless tonight
Cause I wasted the light
Between both these times
I drew a really thin line
It's nothing I planned
And not that I can
But you should be mine
Across that line

If I traded it all
If I gave it all away for one thing
Just for one thing
If I sorted it out
If I knew all about this one thing
Wouldn't that be something

I promise I might
Not walk on by
Maybe next time
But not this time

Even though I know
I don't want to know
Yeah I guess I know
I just hate how it sounds"

hearts to finger eleven for kicking ass. ^_^;.

Well, craposity. o.o

went with Di, Eunice, n Shelley to the shopping center on spicewood today.. we got bubble tea and talked. yay =)

bye..
-j