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2003 7 June :: 9.38 pm
:: Music: Bush - Mouth
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The all-nighter was alright. It was pretty damn boring. Better than being at home though. I met some people and got to know some others. Well, actually I met um, 2 people. Mitch and Eric. And I sort of got to know Mitch and Joe. More than I knew before anyway. After I got home, I watched a movie before I went to bed. Then I slept until around 4:30. I'm not gonna go to sleep tonight probably. Probably wont be able to. I didn't do much today. I haven't much of a today either though so... ah, fuck my excuses. I'm just a lazy bum, doomed in this world. I'm glad school is over. I think. I want to go to high school. I'm gonna take a shower now.
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2003 7 June :: 9.29 pm
:: Mood: alittle frustrated with myself
:: Music: the doom song
My Dream
My parents were having another kid, but they would have to get an abortion if they didn't kill 2 of the kids they already had. So my parents decided to kill the 2 kids instead of the baby that they would have. Sam (Putt) was my brother and Audreanna was my sister, I don't know why. My parents killed them. I couldn't stop crying and when I tried to talk to my dad about it, he ignored me. Somehow, I got trapped in a dream within my dream. It was a dream Audreanna was having.. even though she was dead.. At first I didn't know I was in her dream and I saw a van, a bunch of people were in it like Mama Putt's van, except the van was green. Sam was about to get in it and I ran up to him with tears in my eyes and hugged him so tight. I remember saying over and over, "this is too good, I have to be in a dream, there's no way this can be real. It's too good to not be a dream," because I was so happy they were alive. Audreanna was sitting in the front seat of the van. Then, I found out it was a dream, and I woke up.
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2003 31 May :: 11.02 pm
I got to go to David's party for awhile. It was good, the small portion I was there for. I smell like the fire, I need a shower. *yawn* I'm really sleepy. Joe and I are the losers and aren't at the party right now. I'm so lost for words..
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2003 31 May :: 5.33 pm
Well, I went to Cedar Point yesterday for the 8th grade trip. I had fun. It wasn't great, but was worth going.
I don't know if I can go to David's party. I hope I can.
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2003 27 May :: 4.24 pm
The sky is deep, the sky is dark.
The light of the stars is so damn stark.
When I look up, I fill with fear.
If all we have is what lies here,
this lonely world, this troubled place,
then cold dead stars and empty space...
Well, I see no reason to persevere,
no reason to laugh or shed a tear,
no reason to sleep or ever to wake,
no promises to keep, and none to make.
And so at night I still raise my eyes
to study the clear but mysterious skies
that arch above us, as cold as stone.
Are you there, God? Are we alone?
-THE BOOK OF COUNTED SORROWS
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2003 26 May :: 10.08 pm
the morning birds sung me to sleep last night. No actually, they annoyed me, but I fell asleep eventually.
Haven't talked to Justin all day today. Apparently he was on around 4, one of the few times I wasn't. I miss him.
I hate sleep dammit. Burdens. I always dream too. I had this dream last night that my parents took me to a restaurant that only allowed guys but nobody cared that i was there even though I was a girl. The restaurant was called "Cataway Away" What do you think that means? I don't know.
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2003 26 May :: 9.10 pm
my favorite line from In The Arms of Sleep by The Smashing Pumpkins is "but you just can't tell, who you'll love and who you won't." I was reading the song in Jay's journal and that line made me stop.
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2003 26 May :: 5.10 am
:: Music: Bush- Glyserine
No sleep for Kait
Wow, this is really my insomniac night. I'm hardly tired. Hardly sleepy. I'm sort of talking to Joe and Jimi is at his house. I'm really really bored. Our conversation has kind of died, gotten rather... numb? I don't know. I finished 2 books I've been reading today. One for school, one for the hell of it. I need some water. Too bad I'm too lazy to go get some. I need to work on that. I like fire alot. Yeah, so where is everyone? I realize most of you are probably sleeping, but we had no school, and everyone was pretty much off the internet by like 10. Craziness. Guess I'm done now. Hm.
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2003 25 May :: 4.40 pm
headache today. headache everyday.
I liked my party. Fortunatly my parents had nothing to complain about and said I could have another one. So I will. Sometime. When one is needed.
ran out of things to say, since today is so uneventful and all.
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2003 24 May :: 10.24 am
im having second thoughts.. should i have the party?
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2003 22 May :: 6.09 pm
You are Trinity, from "The Matrix."
Strong, beautiful- you epitomize the ultimate
heroine.
What Matrix Persona Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
I'm glad I got her.
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2003 19 May :: 3.51 pm
:: Music: Radio commercials
Like 17 days until school is over. Then I dunno, 2 months, more or less, of summer. Then I'm a "dirty freshman" in Joe's words. I wish I could skip 9th grade because he is right, the maturity level of most 9th graders is about the same as 5th graders and I don't think I'll be able to survive being surrounded by more idiots than usual. Oh well, I want to be in high school so bad.
I have a dentist appointment tomorrow..ugh.. the dentist sucks. And whenever they give me a new toothbrush, it's always purple. I hate purple.
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2003 18 May :: 1.53 am
ahh.. why do I do this to myself? I should sleep, I need to sleep, yet I keep myself up for countless hours of boredom. It's.. 1:53am. I'm at home, they're at the party. I hope they're having fun. I suppose they are. My socks have penguins on them. I'm going to bed.
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2003 17 May :: 3.10 pm
hahahahahahahahahaha
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2003 16 May :: 6.10 pm
Going out with Justin. Happiness. I broke up with Eric awhile ago if ya didn't know.
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