glitterkisses
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2004 9 August :: 8.10pm
my ass and my boobs hurt, sunburnt from tanning.
maybe it's just me but tanning scares the crap out of me.
*grrr*
I'm pissed at her, I'm pissed at him, I'm annoyed with her, I'm annoyed with him. She's dumb, She's dumb, He's REALLY dumb.
I want to smack all of you for being so stupid!! GET A FUCKING LIFE, AND GET OVER YOURSELF!!!
I vented to Angeeh for along time. That was nice. We both agree that most of the people in high school are retarded, including us. We just aren't *as* retarded and keep to ourselves. We aren't whores, we aren't party every weekend girls, we aren't too shy to not let people walk all over us, we have hearts, we aren't potheads, theifs, follor her and his every move kinda girl, we aren't going to totally fuck ourselves over. Yes, that's right. We are going to have lifes behond all this stupid crap.
I feel a ....screaming coming on if anyone else continues to make me believe a lot of you are stupid stupid...ignorant, irresponsiable, assholes and idiots. Yes, that's right, I'm in a bitchy mood, so fuck off!
ughh I swear the next time I decide to pick up the phone wheny ou call, you're in for it. I'm going to lay all your stupid little crap that you continue to pull evne after the first time , im going to lay it all down, and you'll be sorry for fucking with me, yet again. Stupid asshole.
Wtf?? You think that I don't know?!?! Do you honestly think that I am THAT stupid?? I've known ever since I figured...hmm...this can't be right. You'll read this, think...she's got to be talking about me, but how could she...there have been no clues. It might be someone else, I'll just continue not to say anything, because she can't *really* honestly know what's going on with us, with everything...so you just wont say anything at all. Well you know what? Go right on ahead, because I AM talking about you, and subconsiously you know that! You are just to much of a pansey, dont have the balls to be honest, be straight with me. Just tell me the truth. You know hoenstly? Something I thought you use to pursue, now I just think you are a total fake and foney. The thing I just cannot seem to understand is...this happened to you, and you turned to me, now that you have the oppurtunity wheny ou know the hurt, the pain, the drama it all caused, you go through with it too? you wanted me to feel the same way you did?? YOU DIDNT GIVE A FUCKING SHIT ABOUT HOW ID FEEL! DID YOU REALLY THINK I WOULD TAKE IT LIGHTLY AND BE OKAY WITH IT?? Wow, that's sad. YOu're pathetic. You deserve to be shot. Not really, that's a terriable thing to say, but you do deserve to be layed into, and hard. I just wonder if that would even make a difference. So after you know exactlly how I'd feel, you just what decide I don't care?? I don't care how Jess feels, I don't care what happens to Jess, I love her and care fo rher, but I just dont give a rats ass, is that what you fucking decide??? You piece of crap. Who the hell do you think you are...honestlyy??? WHO!!! TELL ME, ID SURE AS HELL LIKE TO KNOW WHERE THE HELL YOU GET YOUR BIG HEAD FROM??? BECAUSE I DONT HAVE A FUCKING CLUE WHAT COULD POSSIABLY POSESS YOU TO BE THAT MEAN AND CRUEL, AND HONESTLY TO THINK YOUR ACTUALLY WORTH THAT CAPABILTY??? WHATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!! GO BACK TO YOUR FUCKING HOLE!!! You know that time when EVERYONE hated you!!! and I was still there for oyu, I still cared about you and your feelings, I was there for you despite how much shit people put on me for it, and I just dind't care or listen because I THOUGHT you would do the same! DING DING DING I WAS FUCKING WRONG!!! YOU STUPID STUPID WHORE WHO HAS STABBED ME IN THE BACK MORE THAN ONCE NOW AND YOU STUPID STUPID GUY WHO HAS LIED TO ME FROM THE START!! YOU BOTH JUST LOST THE BEST FUCKING FRIEND YOU EVER COULD HAVE HAD! I DONT GIVE A SHIT HOW CLOSE WE WERE OR HOW LONG WEVE KNOW EACH OTHER IM DONE WITH YOUR SHIT AND YOUR LIES YOU FUCKING MORONS!! You know you owe me soooo much fucking more than explanation to do something so shaddy when I'm going through so much shit right now, but you know what?? JUST LIKE YOU, ITS NOT WORTH MY FUCKING TIME!!!! So you can take your fucking explanation, any apology I DOUBT YOU WILL EVER COME UP WITH!! and shove it, because I AM FUCKING DONE WITH YOUR BULLSHIT AND EVERYONE ELSES!!! FUCKK YOUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!
Well...I feel much better.
I'm going to go eat strawberry's and watch a fucking movie, so don't fucking bother me with a stupid comment because I DONT FUCKING WANT TO HEAR ANYONES SHIT!
kfjalksdjflkajdflkasjdflkajdfklajdflkajglkajsdf
GOODWAY TO SAY GOODBYE TO YOUR BEST FRIEND!!! UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I'm so fucking done with this. SO fucking done. That I should have realized how dumb I was believe you along ass time ago.
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glitterkisses
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2004 9 August :: 1.17pm
You want to know more more more about me.
I'm the one honking at you because I left late again.
Hey Hey, can you see I want you by the way I push you away.
Don't judge me by the way I'm acting today.
Get tangled up in me.
Jess
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glitterkisses
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2004 9 August :: 1.07pm
:: Mood: mischievous
:: Music: Skye Sweetnam-Billy S
WTF?!? No really, what the heck is going on?? YOU ARE SUCH A FREAK!!!!!!!
SUPER FREAK lol ok I'm going to shut up because I really am mad. Well..just annoyed.
Stop doing this !!! or I'm going to kick you right in the guns you stupid kid! Keep your little "treasure" away from any girl with a brain.
jaldkfja;lsdfjalksdfjlkdjflkasjflskjf
YOU BOYS ARE SO FUCKING STUPID I WANT TO RIP YOUR BALLS OFF!
lol im crazy, oh well what can ya do..
Jess
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glitterkisses
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2004 8 August :: 4.37pm
Devon came over, we were going to go shopping..but couldn't. :( grrr
Haha!!!!! I almost pissed my pants I was just laughing so hard. That's always fun. Heh. I
really wish you could all see what I big nerd I am when Im laughing so hard I can't even speak..
lol. Lol Shannon knows from last night. I could not keep my giggles to myslef. I almost died
then too. Lol...I LOVE laughing it makes everything better! ahh lol good stuff
Lol I love you, I really do. Lol you just crack me up. And it makes me love you even more.
When I fall in love it's going to be absouletly un-touchable, amazingly fun, and it's going
to be real love. oh and I'm not going to lose my virginity until I'm married. I have morals.
Not that some of you don't, even though there are some of you who let anyone in your pants..
which is just gross..but oh well that's you, not me. I believe in waiting ..and it being
amazing, wether you agree or not, fine, but I know what I believe, and that's just fine with
me. So no more questions please. I'm pure and innocent. Which is the way I intend to stay
thank you very much.
Ah I'm so excited for school to start. I just cannot wait!! *smiles*
My Grandpa is going to be just fine. Sure it'll be rough sometimes, but he's a strong little
cookie, he's fine.
I can't wait for Dev's going away party. It shall be a fun little garthering :) I'm going to
miss that girl. a lot, which I know..I already said. but the girl has been one of my best
friends sinc eshe moved here.
Ahhh I love Mirah Carey...still..haha that's sad, ok Im going to go to the movies goodbye all
Jess
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glitterkisses
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2004 8 August :: 2.39pm
:: Mood: annoyed
:: Music: Skye Sweetman-Tangeled up in me
Last night I went bowling with Shannon and her cousin. It was fun. I had like 86 in the fifth frame. My first three frames were all strikes, and I got a turkey :) tee hee, it was sooo crazy, i suck at bowling :) So me being the dumb girl I am, get all stuck up, like oh yeah I'm gonna win...then i lose by two points. Grrr I was so angry. I'm such a poor sport when it comes to stuff like that. Oh-well I admit it, I am. I won't deny it, it's only bowling though.
I had to babysit Paige this morning. I was so sleepy and cranky. I went over the edge when she threw her tray on the ground. Grr I went balistic! Then thank God my uncle got home, and I just took a shower and Devon called and we talked for a long time. I'm goin to miss that silly girl.
I've come to the realization over the past week or two that I don't like Dan like I thought I did. He's become one of my best friends, and nothing else would ever fit, and without him lately ...i would be even more crazy than I already am. He's been my life saver. Ah I love you Mr . Boom Boom :) lol
So yeah, tell me if I'm wrong, but isn't it a smart idea not to say things you don't mean just because you're upset?? Yes, I'm correct it is a good idea. I know I've done it but I've gotten a hell of a lot better at it , since I learned my lesson last time.aksdjf;lkajdf;k I just am not even going to concern myself with this right now, I don't want too, I don't need too, you do... you you you. grr *shakes fist* it's always someone else who makes the mistake, it's never you.
Another thing I'm done with ..is you. All of you. (no one in specific as messed up as this is and as much as it doesn't make sense) im done with all of it. For a while anyway, because I can't handle it right now.
We had to set my my Grandpa's bed for when he gets out of the hospital and I have never been so confused in my life. The directions involved math, and ahhh I went insane. Geometrey better be easy this year or I'm going to shoot myself right in the fucking head.
I had a dream about you last night. You wrote me a letter and gave it to me on a tractor lol, and as much as I don't understand anything that you do or say, a part of me wanted to forgive you, in the dream..and out. hmm...smack me please.
ERIKA I FUCKING MISS YOU!!!
I know that I'm going to sound like a selfish little brat when I say this but I'm getting so pissed off that I can't do anything. Like when I want to go tanning, I can't because no one can take me, because every things just caotic. Total waste of 55 dollars, and i got a unlimited month grr...does anyone know if like..that means from like the first of this month to the 31st, or does it mean every time you go in counts twords a day to a month?? gkajsflkajlfk;j then I was supose to go school shopping today, b/c woodland's having a huge sale, and can I?? no . I love my family, dont get me wrong, and ther eisn't anything Iw oudln't do for them. I would just really appreciate it if people would start fucking asking me to do stuff instead of demanding it. I would do it either way, but just the fact that you don't have the common curtisy to ask me first, like a normal, poliet person...is getting to me.
*sigh* I want school to fucking start.
aksfklajfklajdfkjadkfjaldkfjalkdjflaksdjf
I need to get away.
Jess
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Shinigami
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2004 8 August :: 1.15pm
Anybody know where I could buy a region free DVD player?
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glitterkisses
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2004 8 August :: 10.37am
anyone wanna go shopping today, call me later purtty please woodland has a big sale and i need to shop!! :):):)
last night was wierd....no fun
except seeing shannon
jess
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Shinigami
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2004 8 August :: 12.48am
Joe's having a LAN party. :P Bert's nice though. He was the salutatorian of my brothers class. He and a bunch of other guys Mat went to school with are here. It's been a while since I've seen them.
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glitterkisses
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2004 7 August :: 8.34pm
:: Mood: aggravated
This is exactly what im fucking talking about!!
YOU DO STUPID SHIT AND SAY STUPID CRAP WHEN YOURE ALL ANGRY AND IT ISNT TILL AFTERWARDS WHEN YOU REALIZE THAT YOU MADE IT WORSE THAN WHAT IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN!!!!!!
kjdfkasjdfl;kasjdfl;kajsdflkajsd;lfkjasd;lf
this is so fucking stupid that it isn't even worth my fucking time, it's the last fucking thing i need. so forget that bs.
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glitterkisses
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2004 7 August :: 10.38am
| Smartest: | jess, andy, logan, angeeh | | Dumbest: | no one | | Funniest: | will and jess | | Morst Boring: | none | | Most Popular: | Andy | | Quiestest: | Cass | | Loudest: | Linds | | Laid Back: | Mike | | Outgoing: | Jess | | Sweetest: | Jenna, Erika, Becky, Cassie, Shannon | | Evilest: | Jess...no one else breaks my nose on an arm rest and tells me shes going to get a bird feeder | | Prettiest: | all of them are, but I'd have to say jess and cass are high up there | | Ugliest: | none of my friends are ugly | | Best Parents: | heather helbling's mom i love her, and jess's parents are like my second ones i love them too | | Worst Parents: | no comment | | Best Dressed: | jess or erika | | Worst Dressed: | dunno | | Biggest Pothead: | i dont have any pot head friends | | Prep: | andy | | Goth: | dunno | | Punk: | dunno | | Geek: | dunno | | Most Annoying: | ------- | | Most Loveable: | all my friends are | | Sexiest: | mike | | Hotest: | mike | | Loves Money: | andy | | Most Depressed: | ? | | Wants a Cow: | devon!! | | Knows everything about you: | jess | | Wants to know everything about you: | you tell me | | Has the most siblings: | jessi guess | | Best Eyes: | jess has these pretty blue bright eyes, and dan has these beatiful brown eyes ahh...i love them both | | Best Smile: | jess and cassie for sure | | Follows You: | no one | | You Follow: | no one | | Ignores you: | ...hmm...dunno | | Lies: | she knows who | | Honest: | taryn | | Most Kinky: | - - - - - | | Most Self Centered: | ehhh - - - - - | | Most Giving: | all my friends | | Most Caring: | all my friends | | Richest: | doesn't matter | | Poorest: | doesn't matter | | Biggest Ego: | andy | | Smallest Ego: | dunno | | Smallest House: | doens't matter | | Biggest House: | jess | | Lowest Self Esteem: | thats a mean question | | Most Confidence: | andy | | Flirtiest: | katie | | Hits on your Girlfriend/Boyfriend: | dont have one, so no one | | Watches cartoons too much: | no one | | Most Hated: | no one | | Most Loved: | all my friends | | Hates People: | i dunno..me and jess hate ppl a lot when they annoy su | | Would go goth: | would what? | | Most Obessive: | bbbbbb | | Corniest: | lol i love corny people it's better than mean | | Tallest: | mike | | Shortest: | jess and eirka | | Nicest: | jess, cass, shea, jenna, eirka, becky, | | Meanest: | dunno | | Deepest [thinker]: | adrian | | Shallow: | andy | | Best for Advice: | taryn | | Worst for Advice: | not sure | | One you'd date: | mike | | One you'd screw: | i wouldn't | | Known the longest: | jess | | Met most recently: | umm...dan i supose? even though i met him before school ended.. | | Worst Taste in Music: | mike...techno...grrr | | Best Taste in Music: | jess | | Worst taste in Clothes: | lol i dunno | | Worst Taste in Clothes: | im assuming that is supose to be best taste in clothes, so probably patty | | One you couldn't live without: | jess | | One you could do without: | him and her | | Clumsiest: | linds | | Most Prude: | not sure | | Most Perfect: | jess | | Most Slutty: | ehh... | | The Badass: | umm...hmm...dunno | | Best Personality: | all my friends, that's why their my friends | | Worst Personality: | no one | | Most Talented: | jess | | Would Die for: | jess | | Would Let Die: | i dont think i have friends like that, but there is an enemie | | Can always suprise you: | jess | | Most Mysterious: | mike | | Gives you the Lamest Gifts: | that's mean | | Seeks Attention: | devon | | Most Guts: | katie | | Want to be Closer With: | mike | | Starts Arguments: | no one really | | Solves Them: | jess | | Goes to You for Advice: | shea, cass, jess | | Bitchiest: | linds when she doesn't get her sleep | | Most Fememine: | kate | | Most Masculine: | andy | | Blondest: | linds | | Most Creative: | jess | | Most Musical: | jess | | The Pimp: | katie | | The Whore: | Jess, but she's not really a whore, just a joke | | Hurts you the Most: | him | | Loves you the Most: | Jess | | Best Student: | Jess and Andy | | Worst Student: | will | | Would Like to Take it to the Next Level With: | mike | | Most Annoying: | haha listen to the next few | | Drama Queen: | brianna, but we aren't really friends | | Most Immature: | will | | Most Mature: | taryn | | Most Talkative: | jess | | Most Athletic: | devon | | Most Snobby: | ehh.. | | Most Original: | danielle | | Would Change for You: | i wouldn't | | You've Kissed: | honestly...who kisses and tells to just anyone | | You want to Kiss: | no more kissing just messes things up | | Can Trust with Deepest Secrets: | Jess, Cass | | Can always Cheer you Up: | Will, Jess, Dan | | Can Always Bring you Down: | Will | | One you love the Most: | Jess | | Gayest One: | Andy | | Nicest Hair: | Jess | | Crys the Most: | me and jess | | Eats the Most: | me and jess together | | Homophobic One: | Jimmy | | Best Body: | i dunno | | Most Likely to Get Drunk and Bang Someone: | Kati'es | | One who can Party the Most: | Katie's | | Best Listener: | Jess | | Unique: | Danielle, Jess, | | Neediest: | Jess, she's need the strokin~ ;) haha | | Motivated: | Shannon, Jess | | Innocent: | Cass | | Guilty: | what do you mean guilty? | | Spoiled: | Lol Kate isn't spoiled but her mom makes her a late night snack, and she has a stick!! lol c'mon |
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glitterkisses
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2004 6 August :: 10.32pm
| What is your favorite.. | | gum: | orbit, speriment | | restaurant: | olga's kitchen | | drink: | orange juice | | season: | summer | | type of weather: | warm | | emotion: | happiness, excitment | | thing to do on a half day: | go shopping with friends, or go tubing with friends during the winter :) | | late-night activity: | star gazing | | sport: | basketball | | city: | new york city | | store: | american eagle | | When was the last time you.. | | cried: | when i saw my grandpa today | | played a sport: | three days ago, basketball | | laughed: | today | | hugged someone: | today | | kissed someone: | few days | | felt depressed: | this week | | felt elated: | not for a while | | felt overworked: | this week | | faked sick: | sometime during school | | lied: | today | | What was the last.. | | word you said: | retarded | | thing you ate: | banna bread | | song you listened to: | Martina McBride-How Far | | thing you drank: | Water | | place you went to: | hospital | | movie you saw: | dont remember, oh far. 911 w/ jess | | movie you rented: | 50 first dates on paperview | | concert you attended: | haha the only concert I've attended was Oliva Newton John , and it was only because my sister was supose to take my dad for his birthday, then she got sick and backed out | | Who was the last person you.. | | hugged: | Danielle Millering | | cried over: | My Grandpa | | kissed: | i hate people who kiss and tell... | | danced with: | Jess | | shared a secret with: | Cassie | | had a sleepover with: | Jenna and Kourtney | | called: | Dan | | went to a movie with: | Jess | | saw: | Dan technically..not including work | | were angry with: | my mom | | couldn't take your eyes off of: | haha wouldn't you like to know.. | | obsessed over: | Kenny Chesney | | Have you ever.. | | danced in the rain: | yes, it was fun | | kissed someone: | yes | | done drugs: | no | | drank alcohol: | yes | | slept around: | no! | | partied 'til the sun came up: | yes | | had a movie marathon: | no | | gone too far on a dare: | yes | | spun until you were immensely dizzy: | yes | | taken a survey quite like this before: | yes |
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glitterkisses
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2004 6 August :: 9.27pm
ughh what are you doing?? aren't you being a little tad bit hypocritical..ughh I hate when
you pull this stuff. Just back off, leave him alone. What is the point?? Like what are you
really expecting to happen, anything good?? It's just going to bad, and you know it too. You just don't want to accept it.
I'm so exhausted.
All the stores at Woodland are having a big sale on Sunday, and I got my paycheck today, so im going to go shopping. hopefully. that always cheers me up.
you're girlfriends bi-sexual,...wait you have a girlfriend??? I don't know ...I really am not intrested in you at all like that...which probably doesn't make sense...under the circumstances.. but I dont want anything at all, and I've never thought of you like that...ever....but if you have a girlfriend...why'd you make a move? ahhh you boys get more and more fucking retarded every day. You have something great, and even when you know that there isn't anything else you can have, you try to go after it anyway and just fuck things up and dont care till it's too late, then total deny it being your fault! I TOLD YOU no, and you still didn't listen. This is your fault...and I can't help you. I warned you. I even asked you not to try anything dumb, in regards to what happened last time.
There's this really sweet, nice ...adoreable guy in our grade this year named Landon. He seems like a really down to earth kinda guy...aww...that wont last too long after meeting stupid people at cedar....*shakes head* Cedar is so dumb...no offense...i love most o foyu, but some of you...are just stupid. oh well, what can ya do.
Thanks to all the people who came to see me this week. Jess, twice. Josh, Tony, Jeff, Katie, Dan, Shannon. I love you guys! and it meant a lot, kept my mind off a lot of things. I don't know what I would do without you guys!
I need to talk to Dan and vent..grrr...
I need to go sleep im sooooo fucking tiered. but no..i can't. why, don't ask.
jess
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glitterkisses
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2004 6 August :: 5.51pm
:: Mood: loved
Well...I've been on a Dawson's Creek marathon for about two months now. Watching every episode from the begging, although I'd seen a lot of them, never saw the ending ones. Today I did, and I haven't cried so hard in a long time.
It's funny, because you lose yourself in tv, and it sounds dumb, but it's not...because it's life, and you do lose yourself in it. We spend our whole lifes just living just to see how it's supose to be, and ...it's so much more than what we think, ever.
Anyhoo, forget Dawson's Creek for a second lol.
I didn't want to go to work today, like always. Kourt and her mom picked me up, and we got there and yeah, I just felt like leaving.
Turned out to be a good day though. Sorta..you'd think that friends could just be good friends without anything else. adfj;askjd
So I got out of work today, went to the bank, cashed my check, then went tanning, and yeah, stupid lady there totally screwed me over. She messed up the booth, so I got in and it only had like two minutes left, and then they woudln't let me do the ten minutes I was supose too because "It's the federal law" psh! Federal Law my ass! Big woopdy doo. So I wasted so much lotion and 15 minutes of my day...lol for nothing!!! I was so heated. grrr...dumb lady!
Got home took a shower, watched Dawson's Creek, and now I have to go visit my Grandpa then babysit.
lov ya
Jess
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glitterkisses
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2004 6 August :: 6.12am
ahahaha......im so tiered do you want to know what I did?!?! WHAT I FUCKING DID!!! Yeah, so for like the second time this month, I was not paying attention in the shower and put body wash in my hair.
I'm stupid.
I'm so effing tiered. And I most certianly DO NOT want to fucking go to work today! I HATE GOING TO THAT STUPID FUCKING PLACE! I hate it , I hate it, I hate it. I just don't want to be someplace like that, were you are restricted to a small area while you're in a bitchy mood, and have a lot on your mind. That's just asking for problems.
UGHHH IM GOING TO FUCKING SERIOUSLY HAVE LIKE A BREAK DOWN! I can't remember the day, the wekk, the dat,e I can't type correctly dfkajsdfkjalkdfjalk;dfjlkjdf omg.. pepper, my dog just flew into the door, haha ok i gotta go
somebody else can pray for me, im all prayed out. thanx , so much...THANK YOU!!
ugh i hope i pass out on the tractor today, fall off, and get run over, and rushed to the hospital...ahh NO MORE fucking work, or changing diapers, or trying to feed a baby food who doesn't want to be fed, or i could sleep alld ay, whenever im tiered, no babies getting into everything, running aroung with brazeers hanging out of their pants...
AHHH JUST FUCKING SHOOT ME RIGHT IN THE DAMN HEAD!..no, not really...
off to work....joy....
jess
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Shinigami
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2004 6 August :: 2.00am
:: Mood: relieved and elated (but not about the purse)
I think I'm going to buy the purse. It's really cute, I could use a purse to have all the time, and it's half of what I would spend on the rice cooker. I know, I could just get the rice cooker and not get the purse, but you know what, I want it, I have money for it, and if I'm going to use it why not get it? I'm going to get a rice cooker, just not now. I will when I have more money. :D
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