:: 2011 8 February :: 9.50 pm

Finally, I realized that I don't belong here at all. Moving out of SF after graduation. YAY! Almost done with school. I dream of leaving this city everyday.

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:: 2011 2 February :: 3.21 pm

Tired of the city
School and internship was good so far. School is easygoing because I'm only taking 2 classes. I didn't need anymore classes for graduation except math and an extra class for the credits, which is western values. Internship was good, but every time I get out of the apt. I feel like great, here goes another day. Not because I don't like going out. I'm just tired of San Francisco. My patience is running low everyday. I don't understand why anyone will find San Francisco a beautiful city. It's all crammed and crowded. Everything is expensive, the public transportation is a pain, etc.. I guess it's different for everyone. For me, I prefer to get out as soon as possible. I thought I was 90% sure, now it's like 99% sure. I never really liked the city either. I barely see nature or the skies. And people in the city have inappropriate/annoying behaviors. Like why do you gotta hang out in the streets? Spitting everywhere is not cool either. Shouting across someone isn't cool at all. Anyways, for me, I barely see any beauty in this city. I'd rather live in a small town, so I can walk everywhere freely without having to bump into anyone.

I never meant to sound negative, but it is what it is. Just stating the facts.

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:: 2011 28 January :: 11.09 pm

Blah
I'm tired of myself. I'm tired of how I feel. Sometimes I feel what I don't want to feel. I guess because I have high expectations of myself. The problem is that I have short attention span. My mom told me that, but I'm doing better. I tend to daydream all the time, which is why I can sit in the same spot for over 5 hours. Other than that, I'm not physically tired. Just mentally. Where I will be in the future or where I will move to. I'm 90% sure I'm not going to live or stay in the city for the rest of my life. My mom agreed with me and we will definitely move out after my graduation this year. I'm tired of not knowing where I'll be, but good thing school started to keep me distracted

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:: 2011 27 January :: 1.20 pm
:: Mood: blah

Bleh
I need to write an entry because lately I feel like all foods are bad and I don't know what I should eat anymore. I've let myself loose by eating a lot of donuts and cookies. Which means large amounts of carbs and refined sugar. Not good for health. Now I don't have an appetite anymore. I ate chicken because my mom made it, but recently I told her I can't eat it anymore. Lately I couldn't stand it. I don't feel healthy right now. I need more vegetables and less sugar to make me happy. Going to my internship allows me to stay away from those foods because I don't get to eat there. I'll just drink water when I'm hungry.

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:: 2011 25 January :: 9.20 pm

I'm not quite sure how I'm feeling lately. The internship went good I thought. It was easier than expected. Then I was left with nothing to do. At first, I thought it was good that it was easy, but co-workers said something like, "Other places aren't like this." Trying to scare me or something. I guess I shouldn't take everything seriously.

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:: 2010 28 December :: 12.48 pm
:: Mood: blah

I should focus on a good winter break and the start of my internship this week instead of worrying about my grades. That can't be changed. Whatever happens happen. I used to fail several classes in high school and never worried a bit. I retake those classes and pass. When I'm in college, why am I so worried?

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:: 2010 27 December :: 10.07 pm

It's like my dreams foretells the future. My grades are gonna suck.

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