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2013 17 April :: 12.31am
I'm not just imagining this but why does everyone expect so much from me? I don't have all the answers. I feel so much pressure from my family and co-workers. I'm taking it easy though. I can't do everything all at once and I'm not going to.
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2013 17 April :: 12.21am
:: Mood: content
I learned to not have issues. No one wants to be around someone who constantly complains about every little thing. I think this is my home now. I don't feel like moving. Another thing I need to learn is to be firm. I can easily take control of situations now. Maybe I was born to be a leader after all.
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2013 25 March :: 2.16pm
:: Mood: content
God never fails. Life can be depressing. I was born to be an outcast and that's the way it's going to be. The problem is that it's an easy thing for me to reach out to people, but I've never met anyone who tried to reach out to me. I'm going to stay put and do the right thing always. If no one wants to follow so be it. I have my standing ground now. I don't care much about useless opinions anymore. What matters most to me is what God thinks of me. Other than that, I don't care.
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2013 5 March :: 1.42am
I never went through any phases. I was always myself from the beginning. I listened to rock songs since 13 years old and now I still do. I never really changed. Same interests, values, likes and personality. The only thing different now is better self-esteem and more confidence.
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2013 29 January :: 10.10pm
From this day on, I will get rid of unnecessary thoughts. I tend to picture worst case scenarios that would make me go mad. Like last night, I pictured in my head the worst kinds of situation. Those thoughts kept me up almost the whole night. Maybe it's because I'm afraid of the unknown. The culture here is strange. I didn't study up on it that good either. It gives me headache.
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2012 20 December :: 11.36pm
:: Mood: content
Weight lost
I lost 25 lbs. and I'm willing to lose a bit more weight. I'm 125 lbs. right now, but I want to be at 115 lbs. That would be perfect because I just feel that my thighs aren't good enough. People thought I was turning anorexic. I know I'm not because I know what I want. I achieved my goal. I did well at my job and the weight lost thing is a success. Next: keep on bettering myself at cooking, organization and management.
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2012 13 December :: 11.41pm
:: Mood: content
I accomplished my goals as planned. I proved them wrong. For the longest time, I felt like I was never well liked. There were a couple of friends who did stuck around and was there for me from the beginning though. I talk to them sometimes and they encourage me all the time. I get encouragements from the folks here too. I find them to be decent folks. I don't care where I'll be living as long as I'm with people who accept and support me at what I do.
I stopped trying to impress anyone already. I let lose and be myself and somehow I'm a role-model now? Since when did people trust my thoughts and ideas? I'm still confused up to this point.
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