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2004 26 June :: 10.23am
theres nothing i can do so please dont ask me to try. i cant do anything until after work. and even then i cant go to the damn concert. just dont ask. assume the worst.
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2004 26 June :: 10.06am
:: Mood: gloomy
:: Music: Pedro the Lion
still searching for who im supposed to be. who i want to be. who i was three months ago. not crazy, not depressed. somewhere in the middle.
"your friends like a certain you, thats who you've got to be"
nothing new i suppose. except that i have the wierdest dreams, and they overlap in creepy wild ways and i have no idea what they mean.
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2004 22 June :: 2.17pm
:: Mood: anxious
:: Music: benton falls
my heart is beating faster than i feel that it should be. now that i can breathe again, i dont know what to do.
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2004 20 June :: 11.10pm
:: Mood: disappointed
:: Music: die trying- words that kill
im finally home and no one is here to welcome me. no one is online. its too late to call anyone. how sad. oh well, i hope i see you all tomorrow.
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2004 18 June :: 11.18pm
:: Mood: bored
:: Music: dashboard confessional
as i sit here alone and quite bored, you all are out having fun and that makes me happy. yay for stacy's party. i hope someone is taking picures for me. i look forward to hearing about it when i get back.
two down, two to go. man, this sucks.
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2004 18 June :: 10.05am
:: Mood: bored
:: Music: benton falls
im in new jersey. yeah. the only thing to do here is what they tell us to, so basically just help them get ready for the wedding. i dont really want to be here. i feel like i missing out on so much, even though its only a four day trip.
one down, three to go. blah.
i love benton falls!! thank you stacy.
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2004 6 June :: 9.55pm
:: Mood: restless
:: Music: socialburn
"Ashes"
Here I sit
Waiting for you with a cold cup of coffee
And a burnt cigarette
That has fallen like ashes
Slowly from me
I search myself alone
Here I sit
Waiting for you with a suitcase packed
And an eight by ten
That reminds me of ashes
It's grey and faded
I search myself alone
Cause there's always somebody
Who's out there waiting for someone to take them away
If I search long enough I might find that someone
Waiting to take me away:::..yeah but not today
Here I sit
Waiting for you the sun has gone down
On a perfect day
Oh I've waited for hours
Please send someone
I search myself alone
Cause there's always somebody
Who's out there waiting for someone to take them away
If I search long enough I might find that someone
Waiting to take me away:::..yeah but not today
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2004 19 May :: 10.21pm
:: Mood: cheerful
:: Music: Jane's Addiction
it seems many people talk to and/or about other people in their journals. i, on the other hand, write of randomness and tend to stay in my own little green bubble of a world. :)
horse.
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2004 18 May :: 7.52pm
:: Mood: restless
:: Music: coheed and cambria
"you look down but far from out and the paper reads 'you lose'"
theres not room enough in this world for the both of us. . .
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2004 18 May :: 7.41pm
okay, yep........so........this journal is gone whenever gunnie is getting rid of em. i've already told you my xanga name.......so yeah, bye
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2004 17 May :: 9.36pm
im listening to some old Spitalfield now and it rocks. you all you should get some. 'tis excellent.
"you play the games you play. you win sometimes you lose. you know sometimes walls run into you. you've rounded life, you've been around. you'd love to live to hate this town..."
maybe im just crazy like that.
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2004 17 May :: 8.37pm
"why you gotta keep the fan on high when its cold outside. just want to let you know that im still a fan, get it. everybody wants charm and a smile and a promise. . . well i promise not try..."
- Eve 6
tehe i like it
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2004 17 May :: 8.04pm
:: Mood: crazy
:: Music: gah
i watched the lion king this weekend. it was wonderful. i hadnt watched it in so long. but now i've got this song stuck in my head.
*sings* "I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts, diddly-deedee"
hehe wonderful wonderful
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cowsgomoo!!!
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2004 17 May :: 5.26pm
okay, so i need to prove jacqui wrong.
she thinks im hot, and i disagree.... all who think im ugly (your right) just say so here.
thanks
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2004 15 May :: 6.30pm
:: Music: linkin park
giving up a part of me, i let myself become you.
no more.
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2004 13 May :: 9.36pm
:: Mood: honk
:: Music: crash
beep beep
reading my own journal, i realized that if i didnt know me, i would think that im a very serious, boring, and perhaps depressed person. but i do know me and im actually quite fun-loving. hehe. so i should be more funny and real on here and not so serious and stupid.
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cowsgomoo!!!
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2004 12 May :: 9.49pm
so true.......it stings, really it does
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cowsgomoo!!!
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2004 10 May :: 10.59pm
okay people i really need your help on this one.
??????SHOULD I KEEP THIS JOURNAL??????
will anyone actually read it? its nice to keep tabs on all my friends, but its no biggie. i can find out other ways. but if people read and respond to this i may fork over the cash. and its not the 2 bucks that bothers me, i can handle 2 dollars. its the fact that im getting the same thing for free. but if people will read this and actually write back i may keep it. so its up to you all.
im gone,
-me
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