c-ramon-otero
|
::
2009 10 February :: 6.29am
Glossylalia Slang and Haruspex Truths
Really bored. And I feel like I'm lacking something in my life. Shit, this sucks.
Thats all for this update.
Light it.
|
|
c-ramon-otero
|
::
2009 4 February :: 2.34am
:: Music: Depeche Mode - Enjoy the Silence
Denny's.... Free Grand Slams....
Worst idea ever. We were packed. I came early to meet up with my friends for a free meal. Well, I got the twitch... After they left, I had to get up and help. And I did... for 10 hours. Not serving, just doing everything else.
I swear, they better fucking love me. Cause I did it for them, not Denny's.
Oh and 5 Hour Energy, doesn't work. Complete fucking shit.
Going to bed in three hours so I don't mess up my sleep schedule.
2 Bridges burned.s |
Light it.
|
|
c-ramon-otero
|
::
2009 25 January :: 3.44pm
:: Music: the Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeering of the Heater
It's been thirteen seconds
Mmmmmmm, just woke up. Been sleeping really well lately. Which is a surprise. But let me catch you up.
Sunday, January 18, Tyler Maten, a good friend of mine died. So I fell of the map for about a week. I went to Allegan to be with all my friends that were really distraught over this, though I was too. Then there was my bracelet that I gave Tyler at the visitation and I got hit in the balls. Cause we were being rowdy and having a skankin' contest and snowball fighting, cause he would want us to have fun and not be sad. Then about 26 people came to Denny's and we were all ridiculous. Then the funeral and speech.
And now we are here. And I have been working. And it feels good. But I'll update later.
Oh and things are going good with Sarah, the 24 year old.
Light it.
|
|
c-ramon-otero
|
::
2009 18 January :: 7.25am
No, fuck this.
So, I'm tired of this bullshit... Fuck this all....
Jess
Aaron
Rob
Amanda
Jon
Jeremy
and now Tyler
Fuck this shit, I'm sick of losing friends.
4 Bridges burned.s |
Light it.
|
|
c-ramon-otero
|
::
2009 14 January :: 6.20am
:: Mood: sad
I'm not sure I can handle today...
"Woman killed in crash planned to marry
BY STEVE RALPH
A Laketown Township woman who was planning to get married this summer died in a crash in Allegan County Monday morning.
Amanda Faye Prins, 19, was on her way to work with her fiance, Michael Bronson, 24, of Fennville, when Bronson's car was struck head-on by an oncoming car on M-89 near 54th Street in Manlius Township, just east of Fennville.
According to the Allegan County Sheriff's Office, Paz West, 52, of Fennville, was driving east around 9 a.m. when she lost control of her car and drifted into the westbound lane.
Bronson said he saw West's car approaching and tried to swerve into the ditch.
"I turned the wheel, but the car kept going forward," Bronson said.
Police said they believe weather was a factor in the crash, which remains under investigation, and that all three were wearing seat belts.
Bronson was released from Holland Hospital around 4 p.m. Monday with cuts, scrapes and bruises. Prins was pronounced dead at the scene.
Bronson, a 2002 West Ottawa High School graduate, said he and Prins had been dating since October, and that he proposed to her on Christmas. They were planning to marry this summer, he said.
Bronson's mother, Diana VanOrder of Fennville, said the couple were living in Fennville with Bronson's grandmother, Phyllis Goen, while they were saving money to buy a house.
"They were two halves of a single person," VanOrder said. "They weren't whole until they were together.
Prins, who worked at West Marine in Holland Township, was a 2006 graduate of Holland High School. Gregg Kirchen, guidance counselor at the school, said Prins was a quiet, soft-spoken girl.
"We've had an awful year this year with students or former students who have been hurt or killed in car crashes," he said. "It's had a sobering effect on our student body and our community. Our thoughts and prayers go out to her and her family."
West was listed in critical condition at Spectrum Health Butterworth Campus in Grand Rapids."
--------------------------------------------
The pain from this, I don't think I can put into words.
I'm going to visit her today... I really don't know if I can handle this.
I just wish that I could have spend more time with her...
I miss Amanda so much.
Amanda Faye Prins
October 14, 1988 - January 14, 2008
-------------------EDIT---------------------
Got my tattoo, and it was painful. Not physically, but emotional.
Every time I closed my eyes, I saw the lines he was drawing and her face.
Light it.
|
|
c-ramon-otero
|
::
2009 13 January :: 1.21am
:: Mood: buzzed
:: Music: You've Got Everything Now - The Smiths
Well well
I'm pretty buzzed. It's all good. I'm having fun.
I feel odd though... At peace. And not that buzzed at peace. I feel... like I'm moving on. Like a chapter of my life has passed. And it's scary and amazing at the same time. Things seem to be finally coming into place. And I'm really pleased. But, I'm anxious. No more running looking for help in the past. Cause, if I wish to live in the past, I might as well not exist. Right? I think so. And I'm not bored of living right now, so I shall keep on.
I feel the pull to leave again. And I love it. And loathe it. Cause I can't yet, but I will. I promise you that.
What do you think? I also have songs finished for my demo, "The Betty Page Bomb". Now to record.
The list;
Betty Page Loves Robots, Pt.1
Robots
It's Betty Page's Birthday
(Untitled)
Betty Page Loves Robots, Pt.2
Obviously, there is 3 themes here; Betty Page, Robots, and nonsense. And there is a lot of them all.
-------------------You've Got Everything Now-------------------
As merry as the days were long
I was right and you were wrong
Back at the old grey school
I would win and you would lose
But you've got everything now
You've got everything now
And what a terrible mess I've made of my life
Oh, what a mess I've made of my life
No, I've never had a job
Because I've never wanted one
I've seen you smile
But I've never really heard you laugh
So who is rich and who is poor ?
I cannot say ... oh
You are your mother's only son
And you're a desperate one
Oh ...
But I don't want a lover
I just want to be seen ... oh ... in the back of your car
A friendship sadly lost ?
Well this is true ... and yet, it's false
Oh ...
But did I ever tell you, by the way ?
I never did like your face
But you've got everything now
You've got everything now
And what a terrible mess I've made of my life
Oh, what a mess I've made of my life
No, I've never had a job
Because I'm too shy
I've seen you smile
But I've never really heard you laugh
So who is rich and who is poor ?
I cannot say ... oh
Oh ...
You are your mother's only son
And you're a desperate one
Oh ...
But I don't want a lover
I just want to be tied ... oh ... to the back of your car
To the back of your car
To the back of your car
To the back of your car
To the back of your car
To the back of your car
Oh ...
----------------------------------------------------------------
I fucking love Morrissey.
Light it.
|
cJessicaPyne
|
::
2009 12 January :: 12.03am
Dear Isaiah Jakob,
It's been a year and 3 minutes since I found you and lost you all in one moment. I'm going to see your grave today but it's more than that. I come by to say hello all the time and I leave you things, but selfishly keep your lamb and blanket and hats and clothes..
But today is different.
Today is more.
Today is my realization that no matter what, time is going to keep marching by but this will never hurt any less. Nothing will ever feel so right wrapped around my finger than yours. Or my arms around you.
I don't fight the tears anymore.
I'm not ashamed and I'm sorry that I ever was. I'm sorry that it took me a few days to confess to my father, but I was scared, and I'm so sorry.
I know you already knew that. You already knew everything I needed to tell you. One breath was enough, for you, little man.
I'll still always want a million more.
But that's because I'm your mama and I love you and I miss you, and damn it, 8 hours was NOT enough. These pictures, these clothes, these toys, these cards - they get me by. But they're nothing compared to being able to fall asleep with you, even if it was just one night.
I breathed you in and memorized your scent and face and could probably measure out perfectly how long your fingernails were.
Things have changed so much and this world is a mess. Sometimes I'm glad you're there, and not here, because this world sucks and isn't fit for you and your perfection.
If there were some way I could cut to the front of the line and be with you, I would.
Or maybe we'd cut ties and sneak away to string together stars and build our own world, just the two of us. We could race pirate ships to nebulas and back, drink laughter and feast on dreams, and just be happy.
Because Isaiah Jakob, talking to a cold stone and damp grass just isn't working for me.
I see Kaleb and Karis and Emilio and Eliseo run through the house on the holidays and sometimes I wonder what it would be like to see you running along behind them. Or beside them. Or in front. Or maybe you'd do your own thing. Maybe you would rather sit and watch.
I was a watcher too.
Maybe you'd be outgoing, charming the pants off of every lady in every supermarket. Or maybe you'd be shy, covering your face.
Maybe you'd have my curls and pull at them nervously.
I do know you had my lips and my eyes and my nose.
I've pictured them all scrunching up into a smile for so long.
One year and three minutes, to be exact.
Your aunt picked up your Christmas star from the funeral home and gave it to me on New Years. I wrapped it in your blanket and tucked it in your chest.
And I cried just as hard as I'm crying now.
1 Bridges burned. |
Light it.
|
|