:: 2003 3 March :: 10.29 am
:: Mood: Unsure

My hormones are driving me insane!!!! Evil things wont go away... grr....

lol had to get that out of my system.

Rachel came over to my mum's house on Saturday, and we sat there together, listening to VCPR on Vice City, occasionally having to get back into the car whenever some stupid car jacker tried to steal it. I had parked it blocking the driver's side, so he had to get back out for me to get out, then he'd run away. lol what a supid group of people. Even funnier when a cop happened to be walking by as he tried this.

I enjoyed that time very much, even though her parents didn't drop her off till after 2 and we're there (on time) at 7. Grr... the one time it would have been nice for them to be late. It also seems that they were drilling Rachel on it too, asking her if I had tried anything, or if my mum was there the whole time. Geez... oh well, it is in a parent's nature to hate their daughter's boyfriend, and to assume that he will always try something the minute their back is turned. Obviously they don't know me very well... I don't try anything... I'm too afraid of hurting people to try anything, unless I know I'm perfectly safe and not going to hurt them... But that would require an understanding of females to even begin to get that feeling. oh well. My weekend was good for the most part, and I'm currently kicking ass in the forest temple on Ocarina of Time... had to buy a new copy, but I've got it again!!! W00t! Well Take care all, I love everyone of ya who take the time to read this rambling. (Even more if ya respond, lol)

:: 2003 19 February :: 10.39 am
:: Mood: Sick and Tired

Ok so I should put my mood in japanese, but I dun care... I'm sick and I need some sleep. Poor Rachel though... she stayed home today cause she'sa sick. I woke up last night at 3 A.M. cause I couldn't breathe. Damn cold.... I feel like shit... I need to get rid of this damn thing.

On a better note, I bowled my best two games last night... 226 and 180. ^.^ Love Ya'll and I miss yas too.

P.S. If Lavitz doesn't get out and kill a lot of things soon, I'm going to go insane. Those evil Dark Wizards have been taunting me for half a week now...

:: 2003 1 February :: 12.34 pm
:: Mood: Content, yet slightly drained

Well... I got up at 7:30 this morning... Didn't mean to. Just woke up early. I got up at 8 and had breakfast then my mom and I went to the Vampires (Blood Bank) and donated blood. That's why I'm a little drained. The content part comes from the knowledge I've got a girlfriend (^.^ Rachel told me Wednesday she liked me, and since I had an interest in her as well, it only seemed natural to get together!). Yeah I know it's a scary thought for me to have one, but It's true. ^.^ I'm not going to complain. (Other than my general lack of computer time... evil aunt)
I need to get a car though so I can go see my friends more... I've been invited to like 6 places in the last week, and was forced to turn them down cause I can't drive, not to mention I'd need permission from my father still... Oh well I'll be 18 in less than 2 months, then It's seriously party time after school. (Providing I can get a ride, lol. Ben said he'd help with that.) Well I'm low on time, so I'll go.
Love ya all, and miss ya just as much.

:: 2003 23 January :: 9.02 pm
:: Mood: Chilly

I want something... Not sure what... Feels like a desire for body heat. Probably cause I've been cold constantly all week. Maybe I'll bring my blanket to school again tomorrow...

:: 2003 12 January :: 9.09 pm
:: Mood: stabby

I'm sick of people not listening to me. I hid myself from my best friend's boyfriend so we could have a decent chat, and it still went to hell. then when I tried to take charge and remove everyone, they decide it's fun, though I can see the pain it's beginning to cause my friend. why wont anyone ever listen to me. I need someone to listen, but unfortunately the only one who would was neutralized by the fact she was on both sides at once. I give up. at this point, I'm done chatting with more than two people at once.

:: 2003 10 January :: 1.36 pm
:: Mood: Relatively Content

I was able to fix my HUGE errors with my friend, so that's a good thing. As always, I'm concerned about some of my friends, and wish I could do more for them. I also want to kill some piggies for my friend (cops for tose who don't know), but I'll only do that on Vice City. That makes him happy to, so it works. Just call me the midnight sniper there. I only wish I could take some time from school, and go visit some special people. the only problem with that is I am close to graduating, don't want to leave my friends here, and I can't drive!!! I know it's sad, almost 18 years old, and I can't drive. Maybe I'll kidnap Jackie, so she can drive me... Lol J/k.

:: 2003 8 January :: 8.47 pm
:: Mood: extremely depressed, tempted to play with knives

Lucky me... the one person in the world who I might have stood a chance with is talking about becomming very serious with her boyfriend. Those of you who know me well, know who I speak of. To make things worse, she's the one I go to to keep my mind in shape. I couldn't even talk to her anymore tonight, and even created a new hotmail address to avoid talking to her while I spoke to my friends. I don't want to hurt her, and I love her very much, but I know that she loves him too, and I don't want her to be forced to choose between her boyfriend and myself. Therefore I am going to be forced to do something I will regret for the rest of my life... I'm going to have to make her not want me anymore, so that she wont have the difficulties of choosing. I have no clue what to do.. please someone help me.

:: 2003 5 January :: 6.31 pm
:: Mood: Jittery

I don't know... I think I'm excited about going back to school tomorrow, and a little upset at losing my membership to Runescape. I know that doesn't mean much to those who read this, but it has become very important to me. I met one of my best friends on there, and now that she's finally gotten her membership online, I'm losing mine. Ack, evil world. Oh well, I'll be 18 soon. I'll just open a checking account, divert a little from my savings till I get a job, and get a credit card and only use it on my membership. lol pay it up right away, and not only will I begin to establish a good credit ratio, but I'll also not have any interest on it.

:: 2002 15 December :: 9.17 pm

stupid bastard... hacked into my Runescape account. I'll get my revenge later... well more than I already got.

In other news, I'm still feeling lonely, but learning to deal with it. who knows, maybe I'll just become a monk. then at least I'll have an excuse not to ever have someone nearby.

:: 2002 12 December :: 1.29 pm

this is my way to live

What about yours?

made by rav-chan

:: 2002 4 December :: 9.40 am
:: Mood: Not Sure Kinda Tired

I appologize for not writing anything recently. I've been away. I really don't have much going on right now, so I wont run on with the mouth and bore people. Maybe I'll go pick on Jackie, since I'm in 2nd hour right now...

:: 2002 13 November :: 9.45 am
:: Mood: Sore

evil work last night. Had to go build a shed. Now I'm all stiff and sore. Oh well, It go away soon. That and Now I'm trying to do this quest on Runescape, and the evil thing keeps messing me up, time for try number three.

:: 2002 1 November :: 11.35 am
:: Mood: crappy

I dunno
I've been feeling my normal sinking feeling and I realized what it was, or at least part of it. What some of it is is the jealousy that I feel when I see couples making out at school. Some of it is the intense desire just to be hugged once in a while, and maybe kissed once or twice. I know this is pathetic, but it is what I'm feeling.
I was going to set this to private and block comments, but then I would be flooded by Jackie and Kate, and anyone who saw I had something in there private would wish to see it. Besides, I have a few friends who might wanna keep an eye on this, even if they don't have their own accounts. I just wish that sometimes I could have someone here. I know that Princess Esther would be more than happy to fullfill this particular desire, but she is kinda not capable of doing so. Oh well, maybe I'm just being a moron again. Well I'm shutting up now. Let's see if I can even hit the update button, or if I just close the window...

:: 2002 30 October :: 9.43 pm
:: Mood: cheerful
:: Music: Utada Hikaru's

:: 2002 30 October :: 9.14 am
:: Mood: annoyed

Class
evil teacher... you know which one. He wont take late drawings, then he turns around and accepts someones late one. What the hell? He's just a moron. Don't you agree?