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Be careful wat you wish for

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:: 2003 3 July :: 2.31 am
:: Mood: awake

I cant really sleep its like 2 12 am and like usually i would be up and talkin online anyway but like katie came home and like got onilne at like 11 10 or someting and so i went to bed bout 11 30 and then woke up at bout 1 30 and now im here and im wide awake, probley cuz im thinkin bout alot of things really.....alot bout britt actually, i dont really want to put them in here really cuz yeah she prolly will read dis thingy. ive got a whole lotta shit on my mind but i cant write it in here cuz yeah da person dats its mostly bout *Cough britt Cough* will read dis prolly neway ill jus stop talkin now bye

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:: 2003 2 July :: 2.47 am
:: Mood: worried

Well i jus told da greatest person in da whole world about da worst thing dat you could tell someone in da whole world or so she says i really dont think dat its dat big of a deal really but yeah uhm i told her dat she was the reason dat i cut myself sometimes....well actually not sometimes i used to do it all da time cuz of her but like yeah i dunno i told her dat i only did it cuz of her 6 times tops when really dats a lie try timeing dat by like 2 or 3 and then you'll get da right answer. I really feel bad about that tho, but yeah its relaly not her fault tho cuz like i used to cut myself every damn day, and like omg you sould see my arms and shoulders and wrists cuz of it. I dont really know waht else to write in here i jus wanted to write in her one last time I LOVE YOU SO MUCH BRITTERZ IN CASE YOU READ DIS AND IM GONNA MISS YOU A WHOLE LOT LOVE YA MORE DEN ANYTHING IN DA WHOLE WORLD TTYL BYE!!!! P.S. DONT EVER FORGET BOUT ME AND DONT FORGET TO CALL AND WRITE LOVE YA LOTS BYE!!!

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:: 2003 30 June :: 10.12 pm
:: Mood: lonely
:: Music: Cant let you go by fabulas and lil mo

None really
Okay hey everyone, Today i learned alot of new things about my best friend in da whole world. I learned alot of new things that scared me really. I learned dat sometimes she feels depressed and sometimes she has alot of things to deal wit and she really dont know how to deal wit them. I always thought dat she had like a perfect life ya know, well not a perfect life but like a really great life, you know what im talkin about one of those ppl who seem to have everything going thier way and they make everything seem perfect, well yeah thats what i always thought about her but today i learned alot of new things that i never knew or even thought about wit her being involed. I was at a loss of words and its was jus like really scary to learn those things. She wouldnt realy talk to me about them though. She jus kinda shrugged them off like it was nuffin ya know. But i know that it wasnt nuffin by da way that she writes in her journal about them. And it scares me because your surposed to talk about things that are bothering you and she doesnt tlak to nobody bout them and thas really not healthy. I wish that she would tell me thigns so dat i could help her but yeah she jus dont trust me, so i guess dat ill jus have to deal wit it, neways im done for now ill write more latah

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