::
2004 9 January :: 6.46 pm
wooow long time no updatee soo... lets c wuts neww? oohh im on my new scn... BlindedByTears2x for thosee who dunno yett... anywayssz... aah timm actually cares about me... i was doubting that he even liked me as a friend anymoree he really let me know he cares it made me happiee... anyway... yeaa ****** is greatt lol i keep forgetting his name aint mentionedd in hereee hahaha mwaa idk y i did that lol... wowww me n stephh r gunna get high on her bdayy... 9 girls and paul stayin ovaa lmaooo<3... well timm thinks somethings seriously wrong with me... like emotionally... cuz my new scn is scaring him n he says ive been unusually quiet lately... eh more later gg!
make conversation |
::
2003 15 December :: 10.35 am
:: Mood: sick as a doggg
:: Music: dammit, blink182
wow im so sick i feel horriblee oo well @ least im not in school... im watching like 8 episodes of alias yeaa its funn to do that but the fact that i feel like shit kinda suckss lol... ashley's real sickk... strep & tha fluu... mom said i was going to the doctor today... hm... she hasnt said anything tho... i dont think she called himm... i dont like the doctor... he pokes me. i had a 101.7 fever when i woke up this morning and all i could tell myself was no wonder i was so cold last nitee... i took an advil when i went downstairs to watch the all things rock countdown on mtv... it took over an hour to lower my fever 0.2 degrees... i was gunna flip out my head was throbbing really hard it hurt like hell. well ima go... i wanna watch more alias mom should be done ironing noww im not allowed to watch it w/out her lol she wants to see how everything came about too. oo well i'll write more later theres no one to talk to online anywayy cuz everyones in school... maybe jenn or tim stayed home today i kno they were both sick yesterday... oo well i'll hit them up lataa mwa xoxo
make conversation |
::
2003 6 December :: 11.34 am
:: Mood: weird...
:: Music: feeling this - blink182
well i tried to be a good friend to kaitlyn... im goin to chill w/herr later n i could really tell she wanted to invite ali so i told her i didnt wanna be the only reason she didnt invite her cuz she knows im mad @ her... so she invited her... but she cant comee so o well lol... omg i cant believe im gunna do this... i think ima call her now... wow i dont kno whats making me want to do this... more in a sec... brb
make conversation |
::
2003 4 December :: 3.40 pm
people wasting their life are all around me why people would do such horrible things to themselves is what i keep asking. each life created by god is precious, and each one deserves not to be trashed.
the pain felt by those who care, and by those who supposedly didnt, is unreal. i need some relief from this stress. what you're doing... it doesnt just affect you...it affects other people. slow down, take a look at whats been given to you. stop what you have started, and realize you're fooling no one but yourself. i see right through you...
make conversation |
::
2003 4 December :: 3.40 pm
:: Mood: tired n stressed
:: Music: figure - linkin park
Soemones still there, thats what I realized last night,
It's almost unfair, that my thoughts might just be right,
If I think like this, you're the only one who's wrong,
Your thoughts dismissed, somehow I'll think of some,
You keep pressing me, like I don't know what I need,
If you could only see, what it takes to be me,
Why should I, prove a simple point to you,
I close my eyes, and hope that I don't hit you too,
I've begun to feel, like I don't know you at all,
I'm not your shield, or bitch at every beckon call,
I do understand, this won't make life perfect,
But can you comperhend, the words, "It can't hurt it",
I do remember, the times I counted the days,
And December, when you said it was just a phase,
So don't preach, about how you were right,
You can't reach, what my feelings are tonight,
Pull yourself away, just says it's a lost cause,
I start today, breaking and making the NEW laws,
You're my bitch, how does it feel to be me,
Try and stich, whats left of your individuality,
You can just walk past, you can just talk,
You can kiss my ass, and royally fuck off,
I could care less for you, but all for me,
I'll do what you do, and walk around selfishly,
I could be the "smartest", and put on the biggest show,
But it's still the hardest, to dip down as low as you go.
make conversation |
::
2003 30 November :: 3.54 pm
i got into the biggest fight last night w/ali im not talking to her @ all... not only do i feel like shes taking advantage of me, but she totally dissed ashley and im pissed off about that! gr i hate herr... ashley made me feel soo much better ((email from her: ))
awww i'm your new best friend! wo0t wo0t!.. you know i'm always gunna be here for you right? even if sometimes we do fight and say things to eachother to piss eachother off.. i do love you kris, you're like a lil sister to me, and i'm just sad that i can't be there for you right now, cuz i'm here and you're there.. but kris, josh kept talking about you.. he was like hmm maybe i should start getting online again! i was like wo0t go krisssssss!
every time i read that im like "omg i love you too idk what i'd do w/out youuu"... thats a best friend... someone who wont be afraid to just come right out n say "i do love you kris you're like a lil sister to me"... shed never say that to me... i mean, minus the lil sis part, but even ur like a sister to me... great now what do i do about the cd we bought together i want it, i paid more for it... muahaha i'll tell her mother it has that parental advisory on it n i'll have to take it off her hands for herr... w/e im like positive we probably aint goin back to how it was... this aint the first time she's ignored one of my problems... one of my big problems... she completely ignored me at the dance w/tim... wow i mean, i didnt expect her to like stop having fun for the whole dance just for me but i wanted like 5 minutes to talk and she couldnt gimme like 5 minutes... i forgave her that timee... im in no mood to do it again... she doesnt deserve to be forgiven again... i mean, would you forgive someonee who takes advantage of you over and over? geez all the voicemails she leaves me are whining about something and the day i go to the jets game and tell her im not taking my phone, she leaves about 100 messages "OMG YOU BITCH TURN ON YOUR GOD DAMN PHONE!" im like wtf is the matter with you? she just laughs about it... im sayin to myself... no, not funny, call me a bitch sounding that serious its not funny... ugh w/ee ima update this cuz if i just keep typing about how pissed i am @ her im gunna like punch the wall or something...
//if u feel ur best friend is taking advantage of u, get outta the friendship or tell that person immediately cuz it'll just keep happening...\\
make conversation |
::
2003 26 November :: 6.35 pm
wow long time no write, well i dont like mr. no-namee ugh now im pissed off i'll write in like 5 minutes ali's annoying me again being her bitchy self like she gets sometimes... *alot...from now on im leaving a final quote @ the end of each entry based on my dayy n what happened in it... it'll be in the //\\ things
//boredom can mentally destroy a person; dont let it happen to you\\
make conversation |
::
2003 19 November :: 2.25 pm
:: Mood: sickk
:: Music: hoobastank
i dont feel good... oh well... read thisss... i told u im over timm!!!
Have You Let Go Of Your Last Love?
Goodbye to You
Congratulations! You've successfully managed to say sayonara to your last love and move on with your life.
Of course there are times when you feel a little sad, or annoyed with him, but these are just brief flashes of emotion and not signs of long-term heartache. There's a reason people say there are more fish in the sea — so they can have fun finding them!
muahahahahah i told youuuu =P... well ima go cuz like i said, i dont feel good... lataa
make conversation |
::
2003 15 November :: 12.19 pm
:: Mood: highh =P
:: Music: blink, all the small things
woww last night was a good night!!! emily came over n we watched moviesss!!! but she found the confirmation video n wanted to watch it but i didnt want to so finally i agreed and omgg i hadnt realized ***** served the mass!!! i was in heaven for the entire 2 hrs cuz he was standing next to the bishop the wholee time we were being confirmedd!!! emily didnt know though so im like madd happy n shes like "whats the matter w/youu?"and im saying to myself *thats the sexiest person alive and im staring at him for 2 hrss is whats wrong w.mee* !!!!!!!!!!! omgg ima like watch that every time my parents arent homee ((cuz i think they're gunna get a lil suspicious of why im watching my confirmation video 20 times in one week if i watch it when they homee)) wait... they just left... muahahah be back later!!!!!!
make conversation |
::
2003 14 November :: 9.53 pm
:: Music: blink, feeling this
wow... my best friend has big problems with being there for me... first, tracing a map would up taking four hours ((yea right)), then her grandpa calls, then her dad calls, this girl doesnt know how to call back when she promises she will! geez i need just 5-10 minutes to talk and she cant give that to me, and now shes "claiming" to go away for the whole weekend w/jenna... who the hell am i supposed to talk to with ashley not being online everr anymoree... i guess i'll go talk to em but it aint thaa same as talking to one of ur best friends... and she aint acting like a best friend right now... ugh i hate this... she doesnt even like to think of calling my cell either and im going to NJ tomorrow... if on the off chance that she does call, it wont be on my cell... of course it wont... it never is... this girl really needs to get a phonee... if she doesnt call tonight im gunna be really upset... more upset than i already am.
make conversation |
::
2003 14 November :: 3.03 pm
ok... i think i do like him still... i was stupid to think i was over himm already when i was that obsessed before... im not making such a big deal of it this time, though... im not even gunna tell anyone i like him again... not even ali... mainly cuz i really needed to talk last night, she knew i needed to talk, promised to call, and didnt!!! grr... but okay, i really do still like himm... alot... more than alot... alot alot... i must tell laurenn... more laterr
make conversation |
::
2003 13 November :: 6.26 pm
:: Mood: depressed...
:: Music: the hell song... my feel-better songg
SoFtBaLLgiRL2060 [6:09 PM]: i dont think i like *****... i dont really think i ever did... i think i needed someone as a distraction from tim cuz i was getting tired of not being able to have him...
BabyBella491 [5:47 PM]: yhea well its good to find a distraction..and u should try to find one/..its realli not hard just tomarrow wen u go to school wutevr guys u talk to usually see if theres chemistry or sumthing
BabyBella491 [5:47 PM]: it'll work out...soo ur not completely over tim yet?
SoFtBaLLgiRL2060 [5:48 PM]: no, i am... i realized i was when i started liking ******... i dunno... im just sick of being single...
make conversation |
::
2003 12 November :: 5.31 pm
:: Mood: missing someonee
:: Music: offspring, self esteem
wow, two days w/out seeing him... im miserable!!! i cant wait to go to schoo tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!! im making a point of walking homee w/himm yay!!! ima talk to him the whole time home n go into mr. d's class at lunch on purpose just so i can see himm!!! oh man, i like himm soooooo muchh... lauraa said i should get to know him a lil more before i go crazyy over himm but i already am =P well i gotta go take care of some business... more laterr
make conversation |
::
2003 10 November :: 3.49 pm
:: Mood: still hyper -- this is only like 2 seconds later t
:: Music: sum41, the hell song!!!
wow i havent looked at the actual layout of my journal in awhile my colors are hott =P and my pic is black and white so it looks cooler muahahah... iwanna change my pic to something sum, or LP... no... BLINK! hahaha but i gotta turn it bLaCk N wHiTe! it wont look good if i dont... i have to see if i remember how to do that... well i will check if i do when i am done with yet another long entry in my journal... muahaha i love my sexyy ****** =P thought i was gunna tell ya there, didnt u? loser! lmfao... i forgot! i told ashley too! but ashley dont even live in new york so WHO CARES!?! lmao... wow i really must calm down... and too think i was ready to eat more candy... but i didnt have enough money... kristen, remind yourself that you owe dawn a dollar for your snapple... ohh i forgot about candy from halloween... how did i not eat all of that yet? =P wow i just got a strange phonecall... i pick up the phone and someone is speaking russian... weird... shes all "you speak russian?" im like uh... no... she goes, in english now "how many boxes of germs you need?" im like, uh u got tha wrong number... ::rolls eyes:: odd people... omgg alias was SOO GOOD LAST NIGHT! vaughn still loves herr!!! ::tear:: so sweet! but lauren turned her in, she gotted kidnappered! lol my new word rofl... vaughns all mad at lauren for turning her in and she could like, die... heh, we all know she wont, they cant kill off the main character in a show that successful... but... hmm... what about whats her face the freaky clone person... confusing confusing... we heard nothing about her last night... and now it aint on for 2 weeks. grr.
i have like no life sitting here typing this long an entry... i need to call ali and be telling her all of this lol. what should i do tom? i could go to the movies w/some people... im so pathetic... i need to find a song for me about him... ::in super hero voice:: to the lyrics site!!! dun dun dun... haha i found nothing... oh well, i'll hear something i like eventually... okay im kinda getting bored of this... the hyper hyper in me has gone and when that happens, im not like normal, im dead tired... i know, im strange, dont ask... laterr....
make conversation |
::
2003 10 November :: 3.15 pm
:: Mood: in heavenn, hyper
:: Music: 'mericals on the radioooo
veronicas song just came on the radio and i quote her "im sooooooooooooooooooorry i caaaaaaaaaant be perrrrrrrrrrrrrfeeeeect" lmao... aaah finally buying my sum41 cd tom!!! yayay!!! ugh finally... wayy to long since i've borrowed it from lorraine! and either story of the year or rancid... lorraine said rancid's cd is madd good too but that hasnt been out as long so i gots time to get that one... oh well! okay now i need to change the radio station to K-Rock cuz w/e i have on now SUCKS! muahahaha SOAD's on! most of u people know how i get with themm... then again... most of you dont... ahhh oh well.
emily's mad cuz i wont tell her who i like, but i do not trust her lol... i call her my next best friend, yet i dont tell her anything and we hang up on each other on the phone like 3 times a day rofl... oh well, i dont care about that either.
still really hyperr that snapple did me no good whatsoeverr... hmm, i wonder if kelsey founded her keys... well if she didnt shed be at my housee....... ::silence:: yea... okay... um... where was i? ... argh my mom wont lemme use my cell unless i need to cuz she thinks i seriously went over the minutes... oh well ima use it on wednesday anywayy when i watch the girls... i wanna go rent identity... wow that was random... EMILY!!! DRYERS!!! roflmao... wow that was madd funny in that moviee. i wanna rent it and watch it w/my mom so i can scare the shit outta her =P okay i really need to update this cuz you know im probably gunna wind up losing the entry before i update it and ima be really pissed off n shit so i update and then i comee back and type more! yay! okay, here i go! bye until my next entry!
make conversation |
::
2003 5 November :: 2.41 pm
:: Mood: scared shitless
:: Music: nothing
omggg some guy just came up to us today while walkin home ((me, steph, jenn, caroline, lorraine, ronny, paul, jon, alex)) n paul dropped some papers on the ground -- some guy walks by n goes pick up the fuckin papers!!! so paul picks em up, throws em out and the guy goes "dont fuckin gimme attitude like that" n pauls like "what?" hes like i told u to pick up the fuckin papers!!! and paul yells back i did!!! and it got into this whole big thing hes yellin at paul "ur a fuckin idiot fuck off ass hole, my brother could knock ur fuckin teeth out!!!" me n steph n ronny got so fuckin scared but me n steph didnt wanna leave paul ((well duh steph didnt wanna leave him hes her bf!!!)) n it took like 10 minutes people were startin to gather to watch them fightin... we so lucky they didnt get into a fist fight. i was afraid this guy was gunna pull out a knife i wanted to just walk down the block watch n see if the guy did anything n if he did i was gunna call the police but finally the guy yelled "end of fuckin story!" paul yelled "fine!" and he walked half way down the block and then stopped to watch us... paul yelled a lil too loudly... fuck him... and he started coming back and this lasted another 10 minutes with the word fuck goin at least 45 times... it was so freaky we thought he was high cuz he was workin on his 3rd cigarette by that time... but finally he left... sorta... still standing half way down the avenue... so me, steph, jenn, ronny, and lorraine were kinda scared to walk by him cuz theres no other way for us to get home then to pass this guy so we all go together but when he was fightin w/paul he got all racist on us n insulted spanish people n ronny, jenn, n lorraine r partly spanish so they wanted to say something to him so they do n me n steph were like oh shit n some guy finally came outta a bar n broke them up but im still kinda shakyy about it...
make conversation |
::
2003 4 November :: 3.51 pm
its official... i dont like him...
make conversation |
::
2003 30 October :: 8.56 pm
:: Mood: anxious
:: Music: chevelle - closure
argh he wont sign on and im actually gunna tell him exactly how i feel...me and annmarie had a 5 page note about this...yes...5 pages long. it took us two hours but we did it... i'll put in the convo when we have it!!!
make conversation |
::
2003 28 October :: 7.20 pm
omggg im so stressed out...i have to choose my high schools TONIGHT! THEY TELL US THIS WITH ONE DAYS NOTICE! omfg im so stressed out cuz i have to order them and my parents dont even seem to fuckin care! arghh!
make conversation |
::
2003 27 October :: 10.43 am
:: Mood: blah
la la la...im in st. saviour's right noww :-P while they learn i get to go on aol lmaooo...aah well i thought i was over him...i really did...but aparently im not since i had that kinda dream about him last night...ashley thinks i am too but aparently im not cuz i woke up madd happy...
make conversation |
::
2003 21 October :: 5.43 pm
:: Music: sum 41 -- still waiting...
omgg im so in luv w.himmmm....and then guess what i find out last night? that he hooked up with cori damn it...and who tells me? emily of course...while hysterical laughing...and then shes all 'oh im so happy for tim and cori' i was so pissed off, i told her i couldnt believe she said that and hung up on her...and then to top it off, lucy tells me about a certain dream she had last night...about the dance...and what happened between us there, and after...this was before she knew the were together though...she felt so bad after i told her...she was like omg...kristen...im so sorry...i didnt know...i told her it was okay...n it was...its not like she was rubbing it in or anything...but it just really dissappoints me... fuck i like him too muchh! i hope its not another relationship lasting as long as the one w/claire did...
make conversation |
::
2003 18 October :: 9.51 pm
i had no idea i felt this strongly for you...
and all i can do...
is hope that you feel the same way
about me...
you're the only one i can think about...<3
i love youu
make conversation |
::
2003 17 October :: 6.17 pm
:: Music: ((in my head)) over my head, better off dead...sum 41
omggg i didnt realize how much im madly in love w/himm!!!!!!! emily asked him if he liked me, he said 'im not saying yes, im not saying no' n then when lucy asked him he said 'no comment' ((with a smile!!!!)), stuck his tongue out at her n walked away...still smiling!!!! aah! thats a big fat yes after all the stuff he's done for me lately!
make conversation |
::
2003 15 October :: 3.54 pm
arghhhhhhh im asking tim some questions n im not getting straight answers!!!! but, when i asked him if he liked someone else he said maybe =D!!!!
make conversation |
::
2003 15 October :: 3.27 pm
:: Mood: happyyyy
:: Music: sum 41, the hell song
omgg today rocked!!! we were down at the 68th field for the walk n tim put his arm around me 3 times!!!!!!!!! =D i was like 'i luv himm'...haha he hit me in the ass twice =P i made ali call him over n take a pic of the both of us...ima make her print it ((if her dad dont delete it...it was his camera!!!)) n blow it up n give it to me!!! ((as long as i dun look like a fag in the pic!!!)) aaaah i really hope he aint jus flirtin cuz he knows i like him...i really hope he likes me too...
make conversation |
::
2003 13 October :: 10.45 am
:: Mood: boredd
:: Music: emily on the phone :P
movies!!! yayy! im getting tim to come! :P im wearing my sexy BLACK shirt for emilyyyy...omggg ali missed matt online this morning! shes gunna be so pissed off its not even funny..i told alex hes like whoa well im not telling her! lmao great now it has to be me who tells her
2 you constantly make it impossible to |
make conversation |
::
2003 7 October :: 5.31 pm
:: Mood: like omggg
:: Music: The Used, A Box Full Of Sharp Objects
wow alotta suprises just now...well i found out that two people i know are going out....two girls!!!!! omgg i was like jesus christ what is this world coming to...there are more gay/les people then there are straight these days...omfgg eric said "love ya" before he signed off today...after all that shit...i was about to say wtf but he signed off...i know he dun mean it THAT way...but i was still kinda shocked...i mean, come on...you really think i'd say it backk? () last night anthony called me hun like 5 times () just for all you who dunno...the () things mean importante!!!!!! ((yes, yes, i know, dont i have such good espanol?)) =]P alright well i wanna go play video gamess so i'll write more later when i actually have stuff to write...kinda thoughtless right now...ohh but im getting a new phone and new clothess!!! ((like alotta them lol))...okiess well i come back later...lotsa luv!!!! <33
make conversation |
::
2003 4 October :: 9.14 am
:: Mood: cold
:: Music: z100...haha they cracking eggs to c which are hardboiled and which are raw =P
im freezing, gotta get changed and get everything ready for later, and i wont have time to talk to ashley today...yes im still mad at her...thats why i wanna talk to her...i need to ask lauren for advice...she good w/that...plus i gotta tell her what happened w/we all know who...eh alright i shall write more later or tomorrow...heh...like i'll have time later...funny...
make conversation |
::
2003 3 October :: 9.33 pm
:: Mood: hurt...
:: Music: Trapt, Still frame
more....
XxAtarisChickxX [9:30 PM]: alright
XxAtarisChickxX [9:30 PM]: will do
XxAtarisChickxX [9:30 PM]: bye kris...
XxAtarisChickxX signed off at 9:30 PM
heh what was the point of starting a new one? i dont know...im just not in the mood to talk to her right now...she really hurt mee...
make conversation |
::
2003 3 October :: 9.18 pm
:: Mood: upset
:: Music: Trapt, Still frame
continued from before....
XxAtarisChickxX [9:14 PM]: kris
XxAtarisChickxX [9:14 PM]: i'm reallly really sorry
XxAtarisChickxX [9:14 PM]: i didn't mean to hurt you
XxAtarisChickxX [9:14 PM]: krisss
XHyPeRLiLAnGeL7X [9:15 PM]: ashleyyyyyy
XxAtarisChickxX [9:15 PM]: ur talking to me!!
XxAtarisChickxX [9:15 PM]: yay
XHyPeRLiLAnGeL7X [9:16 PM]: dont think u understood the tone there...
XxAtarisChickxX [9:16 PM]: damnit!
XxAtarisChickxX [9:17 PM]: i'm really sorry!
XxAtarisChickxX [9:18 PM]: cyber hit me
XxAtarisChickxX [9:18 PM]: come on
XxAtarisChickxX [9:18 PM]: cyber hit me
XxAtarisChickxX [9:18 PM]: come on
XxAtarisChickxX [9:18 PM]: i deserve it
XHyPeRLiLAnGeL7X [9:18 PM]: no thanks......
XxAtarisChickxX [9:18 PM]: kriss
XxAtarisChickxX [9:18 PM]: please
XxAtarisChickxX [9:18 PM]: i deserve it
XHyPeRLiLAnGeL7X [9:19 PM]: im not in the mood...
XxAtarisChickxX [9:19 PM]: grrr
XHyPeRLiLAnGeL7X [9:22 PM]: its not my fault i dont feel like slaps tongiht...
XHyPeRLiLAnGeL7X [9:22 PM]: *tonight
XxAtarisChickxX [9:23 PM]: come on
XHyPeRLiLAnGeL7X [9:24 PM]: .....
XxAtarisChickxX [9:26 PM]: i'm really sorry
XHyPeRLiLAnGeL7X [9:27 PM]: you've said it like 100 times but i still dont feel better...
XxAtarisChickxX [9:27 PM]: what will make u feel betteR?
XHyPeRLiLAnGeL7X [9:27 PM]: i dont know!
XxAtarisChickxX [9:28 PM]: hmmm
XxAtarisChickxX [9:28 PM]: hmmm
XxAtarisChickxX [9:28 PM]: i'll send josh to ur house
XHyPeRLiLAnGeL7X [9:29 PM]: im not even in the mood for HIM....
XxAtarisChickxX [9:29 PM]: grrrrrr
XxAtarisChickxX [9:29 PM]: sam will!
XHyPeRLiLAnGeL7X [9:29 PM]: just go away for now....
make conversation |
|