everyone we know is growing old

1 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me

:: 2006 2 January :: 3.53pm

Wow.....WOW. My mom won the whorebag olympics last year, year 2005! It was an amazing victory, and it'll be a hard for her to beat any of her records. However!, even though 2006 has JUST begun, she is off to an AMAZING start! already beating, nay, CRUSHING all of her old records around this time of year! It is quite unbelievable folks! Damn is she a WHOREBAG!!!!!!!!! *whooo whoooo the crowd goes wild!*

"I'll fucking kill you"

:: 2006 2 January :: 11.59am

all i want to do right now is to hug my two best friends...

:: 2006 1 January :: 12.53pm

<3<3<3

2 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me

:: 2006 1 January :: 8.44am

happy new year everyone. no resoultion for me this year, those things are crap.

it's 2006 which means i get to graduate soon! yay! no more shitty ass high school!

work was okay, but i got sick so it made it less okay. and then i was SUPER TIRED and went all crazy like that night at the bus plaza with brookelynn!

'what is love? baby don't hurt me...'

love,
amelia

:: 2005 31 December :: 9.16am

today i'm going to do a super cool surprise for jeremiah! it's going to be so cool and i'm glad that i'm doing it and i really honestly think he'll like it.

and uhm... it sucks i have to work... grrr.... i hope i ge tto be the one constantly rolling pretzels because that would make it okay. the sad thing is i probably won't get a break... grrr... oh well.

yesterday, the guy who talks to me all the time in my outdoor living class came and said hi. it was strange to see him and rama and rachel stopped by too and then the bestest person in the whole wide world stopped by and it was great! <3

i love my japanese pen pal, she's so cute and sweet!

mmmhmmm.

'do do do looking out my back door...'

love,
amleia

Namu	:: 2005 29 December :: 12.07am :: Mood: meh Unfuckinbelievable.......I just.....I dunno anymore...... 1 told me \| i want to hear the stories of your love for me

4 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me

:: 2005 28 December :: 10.15am

I'm doing my paper right now, but I need a break. I'm halfway done. Thankfully I don't have to write my Japanese paper because it's due on the 17th. So yea... Taking a break from my paper... No work today... I think I do have work on the 30th, but I'm going to ask to maybe have it off because I just need another day off. I'm so tired of work.

I love you, Jeremiah. Things will get better, I promise. I'll try super hard. I still need you here to love you... I'm sorry...

Read more..
I miss brookelynn too... Everything is so boring right now... and gr.

'101 of the hottest bods...'

love,
aelinadkuahngairwhgalokhfgpaihrg

:: 2005 28 December :: 12.09am

Gah, so much is going on right now. And at the same time so little. It's like everything is just rushing straight through my head. So many damn thoughts. I'm not sure anymore if my logical thinking is actually logical, cause it only seems to get me into trouble.

I want things to go back to the way they were. The way things were with her anyway. The carefree days. The days where I got up excitedly, knowing that I could rush over to my lovers house and see an overjoyed face of excitement waiting for me. No matter what we did together, it was fun and great. Why the hell can't things be like that now? Too much going on? School and work? Is is stress? I dunno........but I fucking hate the feeling of slowly losing her.

I miss Brooke too. I still need to give you your present! I hope you'll like it, and don't already have it. Come back soon or else!

I think all of my bad feelings are starting to really pile up inside. I'm finding it harder to be patient, not that I've snapped on anybody or anything, it's just the anger and frustration that runs through my mind. And I know all this crap I've always dealt with is just growing inside, cause I can't help but want to get it all out physically with fighting. I NEED to fight, I just do. I miss my Tae Kwon Do class. I'll find one in Seattle and do it asap.

And I love you sweetheart. I'm not gonna stay in love with you just because of what we have in our past, but rather what we are creating now in our present, and what is planned for our future.

"It takes more than three words(I love you) to have a relationship"

1 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me

:: 2005 25 December :: 9.35pm

tomoko just emailed me! it made my day.

today was a good day, i'm happy.

1 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me

:: 2005 24 December :: 9.13pm

i love you. and i want you more than anything else in the whole wide world.

:: 2005 24 December :: 4.13pm

hello!! it's christmas eve and i got off work early! it's nice. we hired a new guy. his name is matt. he reeks of b.o. and has a beer belly. he's not good at all at making pretzels and he's really not that good at anything... but oh well... today was really slow. kevin gave us a little bag of chocolates to split and then he left to fly to portland to be with his family. someone stole our entire tip bucket so i made a new one with hearts on it and stuff. jimmy steals our tips all the time.

i'm excited for tomorrow just because i love christmas feeling so much. it's going to be great... to bad i have to go to work the next day... i don't really want to... i also have to do homework on chirstmas... sigh... oh well!

i can't wait to see jeremiah... i don't know if he gets to stay for the dinner over here, but whatever... at least i get to see him for a while today...

there were japanese girls on the bus. i wanted to talk to them, but they are just so intimidating... then i saw some people and they said hi to me and i said konnichiha back to them and it was great. ah...

sorry for no updates those of you who's hearts break when i don't, just haven't had much to say and am really bored and busy...

'no, that won't fit...'

love,
amelia

1 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me

:: 2005 24 December :: 10.44am

This world is really starting to make me not happy. My mom is still a total psycho drug taking bitch. God she's a whore. My brother is doing better, but still a dick. Even my dad is acting different...... I'm starting to feel the effects of being alone. I know that she is here, but that's different than her actually being around me and hanging out and stuff. It sucks not knowing how long I'm gonna be stuck in seattle before I can come back home and visit. However I am excited to move into a new place, a place of my own. I just......I don't know how this relationship is going to fare against time and distance. I hope that it all works out though. My heart just seems to grow heavier with every moment that passes by. I love her......

"So am I, still waiting, for this world to stop hating?"

:: 2005 23 December :: 9.20pm

exciting

:: 2005 21 December :: 7.57am

kally and justin quit... i bought a new red jacket that says japan on it... i'm really sleepy... i got to spend time with jeremiah last night!

today i'll bake cookies and such. and love my jeremiah.

'down through the...'

love,
amelia

2 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me

:: 2005 20 December :: 3.38pm

there's nothing here worth saving
is no one here at all?

it'll be a day like this one, when the sky falls down

is there nothing left now, nothing left to sing?

and nothing is okay until the world caves in

Namu	:: 2005 20 December :: 2.54pm I miss my babykins..... 2 told me \| i want to hear the stories of your love for me

2 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me

:: 2005 20 December :: 6.50am

i'm scared and nervous.

2 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me

:: 2005 17 December :: 10.03pm

i work starting at one and ending at eight... i'm going to be tired...

i can't wait to see my lover!!! oh my gosh! i'm so excited!

i hung out a little with lizzy... it was okay, mike was there too.

speaking of mikes i found a picture of my exboyfriend mike when i had just met him. i sort of forgot how he looked, but i remember now...

UGLY.

and now I'm going to go to bed because i'm excited for tomorrow!! eeeee!!!

'freedom, beauty, truth and love...'

love,
amelia

:: 2005 17 December :: 10.43am

Boy did I sleep shittily last night. I guess you could say like crap. Up till bout two in the morning till I got to sleep, room mate woke me up at four cause he was cleaning before he left at five, then when he did leave, I couldn't sleep for like and hour and a half. I wanted to get a good sleep too. Sad :( . Ah well, hopefully I can do that tonight. All I need to do is safely get back to Spokane. It looks like it's gonna happen too, so I'm happy. Weather is okay, hopefully it could be better tomorrow though.

I'm a little worried about moving to Seattle. Don't get me wrong, I'm excited to go, it's only the relationship part I'm worried about. I might be tied up even more up there, or at least for a while, until I can visit my pookins again. I don't know how it's all going to work out, but I sure hope it does. We'll just have to talk about it.

"My face sheds another tear"

1 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me

:: 2005 17 December :: 7.24am

yeah... brooke's gift is at auntie's all i have to do is pick it up. i hope i don't need the reciept because i didn't keep it.

i went to bed really late last night, fell asleep listening to music and didn't realize it was on until three in the morning. it lasted from eleven to three.. that's a lot of music.

bus depot at night (ALONE) is scary. and funny.

JEREMIAH COMES HOME SOON!!! OH MY GOD I AM SO FUCKING HAPPY AND EXCITED AND I DO NOT WANT TO WAIT ANY LONGER TO SEE HIM!! I CAN NOT WAIT TO HUG HIM AND LOVE HIM AND CUDDLE WITH HIM AND TALK TO HIM ABOUT CERTIAN THINGS I CANNOT TALK ABOUT TO ANYONE ELSE BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT HERE!! I LOVE YOU JEREMIAH!!

'did you ever know that you're my hero..?'

love,
amelia

Namu	:: 2005 17 December :: 12.20am Porque nunca me llamaste? 1 told me \| i want to hear the stories of your love for me

:: 2005 15 December :: 8.28pm

I am so glad tomorrow is friday.
but im sad too.

and cold.

7 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me

:: 2005 15 December :: 5.19am

i want to know how many people acutally read my journal...

so who reads my journal? comment, i won't get angry.

:: 2005 14 December :: 4.23pm

today was a good day. i don't really remember what happened in it, but talking to jeremiah made it super good.

he's so cool.

and uhm... i'm going to go take a bath now. because my back is dead and i'm stressed out.

merry stuffs to everyone.

'i know we're cool..'

love,
amelia

1 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me

:: 2005 13 December :: 7.42pm

and it's just so soft and inviting that you fall asleep in it and never wake up.

:: 2005 13 December :: 5.43am

so! today i have a field trip, sectionals and work... yippe... i'm so excited to do all of those things it's incredible... it's like... i get to go and be out in the biting cold on a lake from eleven to two. then i get to go to work from three to seven. and before all of that i get to sit in a room with twelveish other clarinets and feel completely incompetent. and then i get to come home and...

Call the sweetest most wonderful man in the whole wide world! yay!!

and thankfully, i don't/didn't have any homework and my project isn't due until thursday!

bad hair day... at least i get a hat for part of it.

'baby it's cold out side...'

love,
amelia

1 told me | i want to hear the stories of your love for me

:: 2005 12 December :: 6.35pm

Star above me I can see
Far away as can be
Don't know why aren't together
Won't accept this fate forever

Strings from my heart for you to pull
Wings on the sides, and completely full
Of happiness and butterflies
Love that soars across the skies

Carries me all the way
Buries behind it my dismay
I want to tell you how I feel
Shy my breath it's here to steal

:: 2005 12 December :: 6.34pm

Been thinking of you
Don't know what to do
So I sigh
Almost cry
Look around
You're nowhere to be found
A hug is all I need
My heart starts to bleed
With your absence here
My face sheds a tear
Don't want to be alone
Affection is all you've shown
Stay up till dawn
Wondering where you've gone
With you on my mind
Wanting life to rewind
To prove myself to you
Give that which is due
Lie here in bed
Tears are shed
Sleep alone tonight
Hug my pillow tight
Check next to me
Nothing to see
Don't know what to do
Been thinking of you......