Because of you..

:: 2010 28 March :: 10.12pm

I'm jusr fettunng drunk wirg mt husband it isbt no crime hehehhhhhhheeeehheehehehe

3 love me | do you love me?

:: 2010 2 March :: 4.00pm

If you say "fair-i,ix" or "pacifically" onnnnne mooore timmme. Ugh

3 love me | do you love me?

:: 2010 2 March :: 3.54pm

Oh my goodness I wish my teacher could fricken pronounce words like 'pharynx' and 'specifically' and that this school didn't suck so much.

:: 2009 7 October :: 6.20pm

couple things bugging me...

i feel like people lie to me

i feel like people are fake

apparently there are 3 cases of swine flu at my school but they dont tell anyone????

annoyed.

:: 2009 10 September :: 10.39pm

does anyone know why when i connect to my home network on my blackberry- it says i'm connected and everything but my browser wont let me open any pages?

:: 2009 10 September :: 5.08pm

#763239

#753642

#754909
#760995

765987

764963

4 love me | do you love me?

:: 2009 27 August :: 5.11pm

Mmmm whatcha say,
Mmm that you only meant well?
well of course you did
Mmmm whatcha say,
Mmmm that it's all for the best?
of course it is
Mmmm whatcha say?
Mmmm that it's just what we need
you decided this
whatcha say?
Mmmm what did she say?

:: 2010 19 August :: 5.08pm

i hate when people talk about their BLACK friends or their BLACK boyfriend loudly and often like... trying to prove that they have friends of another race or something... there's this girl that is constantly talking about her BLACk boyfriend and showing his picture and saying how she doesn't care what color people are ... "you could be purple. as long as you're cool"

that's nice and everything but i dont know it bothers me when people talk about it like they are trying to prove a point or something.

annoying.

2 love me | do you love me?

:: 2009 13 August :: 11.58pm

i wish i had longer legs and perfect skin and

money.

shitty shit. theres so much more to say but it doesn't even matter.

:: 2009 8 August :: 12.36am

oh and i'm considering buying a spray tanning machine for like 200-300 bucks and like offering spray tanning services ...somehow... someway... i'm not really sure how it would work but it just seems like a good idea.................

i dont know.

because think about it, if i have a tanning package- that is bed tanning.. it costs me at least 40 bucks a month which works out to....woo! $480... yeah. thats a shit load.

now if i had a spray tanning package it would be even more.. let's say 60 bucks a month... $720..

now the machine is a one time fee. and as soon as i figure out how much the solution costs i can do some more math. but i know it would at least SAVE me money in the long run because i am never going to be okay with being naturally pale. i can't do it. i just feel icky.

and then i could like somehow do spray tan parties or schedule appointments i dunoooooooo maybe i could work something out with people that do purse parties or whats it called... pure romance. thats it. i could like do spray tans there

i dont fricken know i'm just thinking theres a good idea somewhere in there with all this bed tanning scares about arsenic and shit.

roman thinks i should start my own business i just dont know.

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

what do you think about a business that gives you a paycheck and when you go to cash it there are no funds in their account??? do you think that's shitty? i do.

thats why i fricken call them out on it and then they act like its no big deal so i get pissed. whatev........

:: 2009 8 August :: 12.32am

i nevvvvvvvvverrrrrrrrr used to have a problem falling asleep. now it seems like i never can. i hope this is just a short phase because i love my sleep.

i just think it's really weird how different everyone is from each other. like i think it's weird i have friends that like, live with their parents whereas i am married and cooked a new mexican/noodle casserole thing for my HUSBAND tonight and like.... that was exciting.

it's strange how different everyone's lives are.

now if my job situation, money situation, and house situation could catch up maturity wise to the rest of my life... that'd be great.

someday.....

ps. jessie kae i love you and i hope everything is getting better. call me when you are able.

2 love me | do you love me?

:: 2009 7 August :: 1.17pm

does anyone know of anywhere hiring?

:: 2009 3 August :: 4.21pm

oh my gosh so you know how i said i felt guilty for not buying that thing from the lady from khazacstan?

now i am looking at local news and i read this:

28th St. hit-run victim
from Kazakhstan
Suspect lodged in jail
Updated: Monday, 03 Aug 2009, 4:17 PM EDT
Published : Sunday, 02 Aug 2009, 11:35 AM EDT

WYOMING, Mich. (WOOD) - A pedestrian who was killed just after midnight Sunday morning was a Kazakhstan native.

The accident happened on 28th Street, just west of Byron Center Avenue.

The woman who died was a 23-year-old from Kazakhstan . She was in the United States with other foreign nationals, and, according to the Wyoming Police Department, was selling items to area gas stations and convenience stores to raise money for a religious group.

A suspect in the hit-and-run was identified and arrested. That suspect is now in the Kent County jail, and the prosecutor is reviewing the case to determine any potential charges.

Police officials are working with the Kazakhstan Consulate to notify the woman's family.
______________________________________________

super. that is awful. i'm 99.9% sure that is the same lady. if not then i know she is from the same group. thats so awful.

2 love me | do you love me?

:: 2009 1 August :: 3.16pm

i posted this quote from a book a long time ago but i love it so i'm doing it again:
My mind is blank now. Every part of my body is sinking and empty. I don't have to think about anything, hear anything, say anything, feel anything, worry about anything.
...there are no job interviews, no hypocrites. I do not have to... socialize. I do not have to smile. I do not have to justify my beliefs. I don't have to wear dress shoes. I don't have to pledge allegiance to the flag. I don't have to use a number two pencil. I don't have to read the fine print.
...it is true that it is nonproductive. But when ninety-five percent of out-of-bed activities hold the possibility of pain, to be pain-free is simply the most delicious feeling in the world.

-not mine

________________________________________

i'm reading through old entries. it makes me sad...

JESS this comment from you made me laugh hard.

"10-30-07 7:52am
jess i'm wearing my glasses today to cover my face lol

ttyl
"

do you remember that?

and this is funny to me
"now if only i could get myself to start fricken working out . seriously. i need to get serious about that. i really really do. i just feel like a moron in front of all those muscley guys. eww and i don't want to run on the tredmills and fall on my face like on a tv show. i'd be so embarassed. and it would hurt. i can't run on those treadmills. i'm not coordinated enough to do that and listen to my earphones and sing MY hUMPS in my head and watch the tvs with no sound and worry about what people are thinking of me and check my heart rate all at the same time.

HOW DO YOU PEOPLE DO IT. HOW DO YOU RUN ON TREADMILLS.

and that m y friend is the question of the day. how DO you people run on treadmills.
"

:: 2009 1 August :: 2.35pm

why do i feel so bad when a person who says they are a missionary from khazakstan that tries to help people from drug abuse and absitence before marriage etc. comes into my work and tries to sell me a pretty windchime and i refuse?

why do i feel so guilty?!!?

i only had 10 bucks on me and they were 15 and up.

the saddest part is i probably would have bought one if i had the extra 5.

i cannnnnt saaaaaay noooooooooooooo.

...isn't khazacstan the country borat was from? well... she didn't look like borat.