:: 2005 22 April :: 8.11 am

u*p*d*a*t*i*n*g

im so damn bored. there is nothing to do in this class. maybe work on my assignments but that is what the weekend is for i believe. good weekend that is finally here. everyday is a busy day. something to do. something to do. I need my life to chill out and slow down just a little bit so that I can catch up.
I guess that i just need to slow the game down in my head but whats the point. bored bored bored bored.
i hate journalism class. hate hate hate it.
i want the day to end so I can be in sparta or at home sleeping.
my game is a double header is sparta. everyone should go.
Luke will be there. thats all that i know. and maybe my dad not that I can count on that. I cant wait to see whatever surprise it is that pj is referring to. blahg. this presents itself as a long day. I should really stop swearing all of the time. how trashy does that make me look?
ive cut back a lot i think. do you think I have an overshadowing personality? goodness im tired. test today in britetature. not too thrilled to hear that cuz im going to fail. blowsy. why is there still time left in the class . be over already gahd.
I still have no idea what to write this editorial about. shit. i cant afford to fail it. well . darn it all.
have a golly gosh darn good day everybody. i love you pj

Catch a Star

:: 2005 22 April :: 7.44 am

I just wanted pj to know that I feel like his influence is eating me alive.
a l i v e


I joined a forum
*blast to the face*

10 stars caught | Catch a Star

:: 2005 21 April :: 11.22 am

everyone knows that econ blows
what am I opinionated about?
as in what should i write my editorial about.
that is the question plagueing the liz's
bussie is talking

6 stars caught | Catch a Star

:: 2005 21 April :: 7.51 am

im in journalism right now. supposed to be doing some editorial or something. not thrilled about that prospect.
last nights game kicked so so so much.
i hit so well and I was so excited with myself. giggleing.
i cant even believe how much improvement that was. i think that mr reed was pretty happy about it. i know that I was . yayayyayay
anyway we won both games. obvioso. and we mercied them once.
pj was there and that was great cuz i love him so much. then he left and then after the game we went to mikkydees and had a great time with that too. score!!!!
i wonder what is for lunch today. god i am tired. i got up at 6:50 this morning and thats pretty late. geeh.
well pj I love you. cant wait for saturday when i finally get to see you again. I miss you a lot. so much.

Catch a Star

:: 2005 20 April :: 11.23 am

well middleville game tonight. I feel so much better. well i didnt feel particularly bad to begin with, i just wanted to make everything okay. i just realized though that as much as I try and as much as I want/need it, pj is not going to like luke ever. so thats life. i will go on with it because there is nothing else to do. im certainly done trying to sell him.

blah blah blah.
im pretty excited about tonights game. unthrilled about having to dress up. its just so not me, and I hate this short skirt and this tank top that shows too much of me. god.

i hope econ dosent suck. i mean im not holding out too much hope for that based on prior econ experiences but you never know. we get to leave for the game at 2. yayay. i cant even wait.

Catch a Star

:: 2005 19 April :: 2.07 pm

wow im tired.
so tired
not thrilled about going to practice today
its not going to be fun
its an error counter
ehh
but in other words
i love pj.
not that that is anything new
well later

Catch a Star

:: 2005 18 April :: 7.38 pm

u*p*d*a*t*i*n*g
so we lost today. the score 4-3.
not bad but certainly not good
I personally had a pretty great game though.
a really solid hitting game
I relaxed and the hits came to me easy. nice line drives in between players. getting me on base. stole second because I saw that the catcher couldnt make that throw. good call on my part. even though I think reed almost had a heart attack. whoops. i just wish everyone could have started hitting before the seventh inning. thats the way it goes though.
im so tired now and I want to clean my room
i feel really refreshed. Id like to talk to pj.
I realized today that I cannot have my cake and eat it too.
that sounds really cliche im aware.
i just dont know what im doing
but i do know what I want. which is pretty great. to know/
i just need like 2 carefree day and everything will be good. great it will be. life presents itself as too hard for me.
im going to clean my room
someone call me im so bored.
pj i love you.

3 stars caught | Catch a Star

:: 2005 18 April :: 11.23 am

well then there was all of that.
in the brit lit, I feel asleep and I guess millard started talking about my book and asked if it was anyones book but i was sleeping so I woke up like halfway through and she was talking and I was like, hey clockwork orange. but then I felt like a complete ass. the ned is kinda slowing down, letting me talk a little bit.
I am glad to have everything worked out. only I dont think I can agree with pj and matt. I talked to mitch and phil and the like competely disagree and since I hold both of them in high esteem... well what.

2 stars caught | Catch a Star

:: 2005 17 April :: 2.44 pm

when is this luke thing gonna end? can you answer that. because it really really bothers me. like its killing me because I dont want to have to worry about it all of the time and thats what its turning into. please try harder for me. because you love me and I love you, more than anything in the world and I would never hurt you or jeopordize what we have. all I feel like is that you dont trust me. just TRUST ME. I love you so goddamned much.


in other news. My softball team took first in our Tournament go us. I was pretty happy about it but now its just eh. more tournaments to win now I suppose. plus other things. egh. did some late assignments today, gotta pull my ass back up where it belongs. gotta work in an hour. blow. my lips hurt real bad too. I played all three games in the tourny and I did pretty ok, I guess. not my best performance but theres nothing to do but practice and try harder. home game monday, everyone should come, cuz im cool. thank you to those of you who were there. I love to see you. to see support.
Pj I love you. Ill call you before and probably after work. I love you. so much.

Catch a Star

:: 2005 17 April :: 2.43 pm

She don’t even know exactly where she wants to go
Is that a double negative oh never mind let’s go
To the next line of the story
I met her at the smoothie king she said Seattle’s best
She may be right think I remember coffee on her breathe
She smoked cigarettes, I chewed bubble gum

I know I shouldn’t take it but I think I kind of like it
When she tells me that I’m dumb
And this may sound pathetic but I think that we can make it
We’ll go on and on and on and on

Love songs suck and fairy tales aren’t true
And happy ending Hollywood is not for me and you

So add it up and break it down
It’s not that hard to figure out
Your crazy and I’m crazy about you

Everyone around me says she brings a brother down
And mommy thinks she’s great but then again she’s not around
To see her throw a fit, borderline conniption
And all this only matters if we listen anyway
And she’s all I can think about so I must not be gay
I’m a lunatic and she’s my psychopath

I know I shouldn’t take it but I think I kind of like it
When she tells me that I’m dumb
And this may sound pathetic but I think that we can make it
We’ll go on and on and on and on

Love songs suck and fairy tales aren’t true
And happy ending Hollywood is not for me and you

So add it up and break it down
It’s not that hard to figure out
Your crazy and I’m crazy about you

And we are the lucky ones we’ll get matching tee shirts airbrushed at the mall
Hang out at the pretzel stand and make fun of people and laugh if someone falls
Watch everyone else hold hands and try so hard and maybe we’ll start to see
That you and me we’re not so crazy

Michael Bolton (never liked him)
Celine dion
Air Supply
And now… ME

Love songs suck and fairy tales aren’t true (Love songs make me sick cuz they’re not true)
And happy ending Hollywood is not for me and you
Hollywood California
So add it up and break it down (add it up and break it down)
It’s not that hard to figure out
Your crazy and I’m crazy about you

Love songs make me sick cuz they’re not true
Your crazy and I’m crazy about you
Crazy cuz im crazy about you
Your crazy and im crazy about you… yeah

Catch a Star

:: 2005 15 April :: 7.09 pm

i dont want extra hormones any more. BOG take 'em away.

Catch a Star

:: 2005 15 April :: 6.47 pm

so la ti da.
I talked to mr. reed and mr. smith and here is the conclusion of the day. A huge misconception in softball and baseball today is that right field is for the sucky players (thats what I always thought!)
but alas. I am there because dum dee dum. apparently I am fast and the only person that can back up the over throws and are constantly heading towards first base. the sad fact is that most of the overthrows go to first and that is where backup is most needed. bring in that I am the only outfielder on the team who is catching the concept of backup and when an overthrow goes past right field that is a run. because no one could catch it. Just like last night when it rolled right past pammy K.

so there we have it. Im not sure how much smoke was blown up my ass. but they did say that when the bad throws ceased I would be back in my left field element. even though I took right last year. either way Im starting and playing

Now as far as babying goes, they were really concerned because no one really knew what was going on and mr, reed just didnt want me to push too hard because of the lack of information regarding the lump.
so tournament tomorrow I hope you all will be there. Im expecting at least, PJ, sammy huey, and Luke.

we are going to win. I am excited, exclamation point, exclamation point, exclamation point .

thats the daily and pj I love you so dearly

1 stars caught | Catch a Star

:: 2005 15 April :: 6.46 pm

this is my week
Ive totally listened to this song like 87 times this week. for real




\
[Learn To Fly]
Run and tell all of the angels
This could take all night
Think I need a devil to help me get things right
Hook me up a new revolution
Cause this one is a lie
We sat around laughing and watched the last one die

I'm looking to the sky to save me
Looking for a sign of life
Looking for something to help me burn out bright

I'm looking for complication
Looking cause I'm tired of trying
Make my way back home when I learn to fly

I think I'm done nursing the patience
I can wait one night
I'd give it all away if you give me one last try
We'll live happily ever trapped if you just save my life
Run and tell the angels that everything is alright..
Fly along with me, I can't quite make it alone
Try and make this life my own

Catch a Star

:: 2005 15 April :: 1.51 pm

alright so i was incorrect.
Its NOT a goiter, it is the toxic nodule/tumor that had already found harbor on my thryroid, only now it is swollen and press onto my vocal cords, giving me a horrid cough and a really crazy voice. it blows. and the softball situation is not great either. mr.reed is really babying my and I hate it so much. I know what my limitations are so please allow me to play in left field the way I know how and please please please dont pull me from the game so that I can have a break. I dont want that at all, IF I need a break I will be the first person to say so. the whole deal really really uber bummed me out. I hate crying at the field and in front of people it super blows. but thats the day

Catch a Star

:: 2005 14 April :: 11.20 am

I have a ginormous goiter on my neck. yes a mass of material building on the side of my thyroid. causes discomfort, protrusive, and vocal cord annhililation. My mom is currently calling the doctor. at least she was when I called her over lunch and freaked out at her. i can barely talk, and the talking I do sounds like a horse of something. really raspy and not my own voice. I dislike it very much because my throat burns. Well there is a game tonight. yay again. I am all dressed up though because its a home game and Im not really feeling that all too much, but what can you do. besides be independent from the team. only then its not really a team right? well either way. its just another day. Happy Birthday to Joslyn tomorrow. since she wont be in the school. blah on that my friend, blah on that. Im lame though and Have no Money therefore the gift of your 18 year will be nothing but all the love, and hugs in the world. you know you want it. just take it. in other news. well I suppose that there isnt any other news. we got a new girl today and that was nice. she seemed pretty nice. brechting and I chatted it up with her for awhile. Im sitting in front of a window and its not a very pleasant draft I gotta tell ya. but either way thats my daily econ post. mr busen=not so cool





But I do love PJ...

4 stars caught | Catch a Star