:: 2006 11 January :: 2.09 pm

its funny how things work out.
not funny haha but like wow.
what was i thinking.
im glad we realized it when we did, how different we really are.
my life is so different than i ever thought it would be.

5 stars caught | Catch a Star

:: 2006 7 January :: 8.40 pm

i love him
i mean really really really.
he pisses me off so bad sometimes.
but then im happy again.
he is nice.
work today sucked major but thats cuz i was mad the whole time and then i wasnt after we went to mikky dees and went home.
now we are here at home, doing laundry and drinking mountain dew.
i so couldnt be happier which is crazy with everything that is going on.
officially my thyroid is hyperactive again.
so i have to miss my first day of classes for an appointment.
suckness.
my mom did find a savings bond today that is mature and worth 50.
for me yay yay.okay laters

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:: 2006 4 January :: 10.32 am

I ordered my books.
Yay books.
160.46.
oh come on baby i got two and a half hours.
whoopsy.
thats what ray says.
we have to go and put his transmission back into place right now and he is irritated that he needs my help and i am on woohu.
eek.
lol
I like it that he can fix his own car.
a new clutch is the deal right now.
so hot.

2 stars caught | Catch a Star

:: 2005 29 December :: 5.36 pm

My journal will be forever and on now friends only.
sorry creepy stalker people
Cough>grandpa,deidra,dad

1 stars caught | Catch a Star

:: 2005 26 December :: 11.39 am

things have become strange again.
i am disliking change and his attitude scares me.

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:: 2005 23 December :: 9.48 am

I never thought that would be true

Your 2005 Song Is

Since You've Been Gone by Kelly Clarkson "But since you've been gone I can breathe for the first time I'm so moving on" In 2005, you moved on.

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:: 2005 22 December :: 6.17 pm

holla'
im at home right now.
I have been for a week.
its cool.
im liking the at homeness.
food.
food is good.
work has sucked.
im feeling better.
chris best.
go to my academic records.
then final grades and that will give you your final grades.
.
ray is going to texas tomorrow and that has me all kinds of sad.
im not sure what to make of anything anymore. i mean as far as he is concerned.
my brother said that he reminds him of marty.
that is an odd comparison.
what since ray doesnt smoke weed and all.
my parents and I have been rowing over my smoking.
i have the night off thank god.
last night i worked adn then I stayed at kristens.
that sucked cuz ray and I fought the entire night.
i hate fighting.
i was being really unreasonable though.
okay dinnertime says my brother.
AWESEOME.
Merry christmas to you all because I wont update again until its all over and done with.

2 stars caught | Catch a Star

:: 2005 21 December :: 9.08 am

so brief synopsis here.
I am sick.
sick sick sick.
on some nasty horsepills.
I have a horrendouse sinus infection and my thyroid thing is probably back.
i have a very large lump next to my thyroid protruding out of my neck.
I got to work yesterday heather looked at me and told me to go home.
I have to work again today.
im going to work because I need to work, because I need the money.
I hate poor.
in brighter news.
I passed all of my classes.
Yay yay yay.
I really didnt think that I would or that I could and I did.
so yayness for me.
yay yay.
Two D's C and a B.
not great but I could have done so much worse and I am happy anyway ray is here so im out bitches.

1 stars caught | Catch a Star

:: 2005 19 December :: 10.14 am

Your Birthdate: February 15

You take life as it is, and you find happiness in a variety of things. You tend to be close to family and friends. But it's hard to get into your inner circle. Making the little things wonderful is important to you, and you probably have an inviting home. You seek harmony with others, but occasionally you have a very stubborn streak. Your strength: Your intense optimism Your weakness: You shy away from exploring your talents Your power color: Jade Your power symbol: Flower Your power month: June

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:: 2005 14 December :: 3.11 pm

MATT WHETZEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hang out with me tomorrow night.
I left a message on your phone.
finals are over and I have some free time.
Be my friend.
I love you.
Call me.

1 stars caught | Catch a Star

:: 2005 14 December :: 1.01 pm

i am actually more nervous now, after having taken the exam.
time for some sleep though,
then work at 4.
suck on work.
its going to be some kind of hell in that place and i am not prepared to deal with it.
goddamn people and their layaways.
let me tell you.

Catch a Star

:: 2005 14 December :: 10.50 am

I was lying in bed last night, almost asleep all cuddly and warm and just ready to be peaceful and I said, oh shoot I forgot the laundry in the dryer.
he got up and not only got my laundry but apparently put more in being that when I woke up this morning all of my laundry was folded and nice in a pile in my room.
I dont want to go home because I am going to miss him so much.
I dont want to sleep alone. ever.
we talked about a lot of stuff last night, it was cool.
I mean we always talk about stuff but we talked about us. and our relationship.
I dont know if it was the day, but we talked a good long talk.
he asked me if I felt that my days of wanting to be single were over.
and I said thats hard to answer. they are for the moment. isnt the moment all that matters.
and then he said what are you doing tomorrow around two. lets get married because I dont want to ever lose you.
and I called him ridiculous and crazy and impulsive and said if you find the priest Ill be there.
at this time last year I would have said the same thing to pj.
that is what is so scary.
Im afraid because of him.
how is it that things just stop.
i mean it was a gradual stop and I cannot say that if circumstances were different i would still be in love with him and want to spend the rest of my life with him.
ray said that you can fall in love with anyone under the right circumstances. if you just focus on the good..
I think he is right there.
the next couple of weeks are going to be crazy.
i dont have to work that much and I dont have school. so im just going to sit around and veg it out.
ray has school. and then on friday he is going to texas.
he is going to come back on wednesday.
renewed accent and all.
I heart his accent.
im supposed to clean today.
whoops i dont want to .
I have my final final at 12.
i thought it was at 10 though and so i went there and there was one other person and i was like hey and then the two of us sat there for 15 minutes and i was like um im going to find his office and come to find out it was at noon instead of 10.
whatever. at least it wasnt the other way around.
also ive gotten almost all of my christmas done with.
I have to get gifts for Kristin, heidi, haven, and kristin's mom.
whose name i cannot remember.
crappers.
oh and kaylee.
and ray.
but his is going to wait until after christmas because I am getting him a sweet ass guitar.
he picked it out when we went to guitar center and it is pretty and about $400.
so that will take some saving.
he doesnt know that is what im getting him though.
he is going to get me a kick ass digital camera though, or so he says.
im afraid of what is going to happen when we get into the stage where we dont have that like, learning something new every day and falling more in love every day.
that will be sad and im not going to like it.
we talked about that too though, and he was all like, you have to try to keep those things going, its when you stop trying that things go sour.
i dont know.
i should go take a shower and get all relaxed before this final. its the kicker.
Holla'

Catch a Star

:: 2005 13 December :: 5.25 pm

precisely
She was driving last Friday on her way to Cincinnati
On a snow white Christmas Eve
Going home to see her Mama and her Daddy with the baby in the backseat
Fifty miles to go and she was running low on faith and gasoline
It's been a long hard year
She had a lot on her mind and she didn't pay attention
She was going way to fast
Before she knew it she was spinning on a thin black sheet of glass
She saw both their lives flash before her eyes
She didn't even have time to cry
She was sooo scared
She threw her hands up in the air

Jesus take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this all on my own
I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
To save me from this road I'm on
Jesus take the wheel

It was still getting colder when she made it to the shoulder
And the car came to a stop
She cried when she saw that baby in the backseat sleeping like a rock
And for the first time in a long time
She bowed her head to pray
She said I'm sorry for the way
I've been living my life
I know I've got to change
So from now on tonight

Jesus take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this on my own
I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
To save me from this road I'm on

Oh, Jesus take the wheel
Oh, I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
Save me from this road I'm on
From this road I'm on
Jesus take the wheel
Oh, take it, take it from me
Oh, why, oh

Catch a Star

:: 2005 13 December :: 5.21 pm

I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty

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:: 2005 13 December :: 4.48 pm

hardy har har.
today was good day.
things are good.
we are good.
too bad yall dont have face book because my photo album is kicking and growing.
i adore digital cameras.
im all about pictures all the time.
its a sony cybershot and we make videos and stuff.
thats all sorts of goodness.
alright alright i need to study up a little for the art final.
art art art. I love art.
yayers. tonight is spaghetti night.
we will throw noodles at the wall and it will be funtastic and then i will study for my math. yuckers on math.
hehe.
i couldnt be more content.

edit*
i could be better if I had a mountain dew.

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