please don't break me...</3

:: 2008 19 December :: 3.32pm

One semester left until I am thrown into the real world without guidance or a job.

I AM SO EXCITED TO NOT HAVE HOMEWORK OR TESTS ANYMORE OMG

In other news, I'm going to Lansing this weekend.

queenofcarrotflowers

:: 2008 16 December :: 1.37am

one year. :)

7 broke me | I think im broken

:: 2008 12 December :: 10.13pm

I hate Windows
Me: Hey, I wanna play this game with my 360 controller.

Windows: Oh okay.

Me: This game says it's the coolest with the controller.

Windows: Mmhmm.

Me: It says it does rumble.

Windows: Yes.

Me: So, I'm gonna plug it in...and you should...see it right?

Windows: Sure.

Me: Okay, it's there.

Windows: I'm not seeing it.

Me: Well, it's there.

Windows: Still not seeing it.

Me: Let me unplug it and I'll put it back in.

Windows: Uh no. Nothing.

Me: Um. So. Do you need a driver or something for this?

Windows: I'm not quite sure.

Me: Can you check?

Windows: No.

Me: Well, I'm going to ask Google. He always knows.

Windows: I can wait.

Me: He says you do.

Windows: Okay.

Me: I went to your website and you just wanted me to buy a controller.

Windows: Well, yeah. You need one to play the game.

Me: Yeah, well. I have one right here. Remember? It's plugged in.

Windows: Oh. Yeah. I can't see it though.

Me: Right.

Windows: Right.

Me: So, I'm going to go ask Google again. Maybe he knows a better place.

Windows: Okay.

Me: He told me to go to your website again.

Windows: Yeah, it's probably there.

Me: Well, the link they sent me to? It doesn't work.

Windows: Huh.

Me: So. I'm going to look around a little.

Windows: Okay.

Me: Why isn't it on the page with the controller? You know. Under related topics or links or whatever.

Windows: Shrug.

Me: Huh.

Windows: ...

Me: Oh well I'm going to go to this product download link.

Windows: Mmhmm.

Me: Why do you need to know what I'm downloading it for? I told you on that other page.

Windows: I forgot.

Me: ...

Windows: I can't see it. I forgot.

Me: ...

Windows: ...

Me: Okay, well it's downloading.

Windows: What?

Me: A driver or something. I don't know. It's downloading.

Windows: Okay.

Me: Why is it going to take five minutes?

Windows: I don't know.

Me: Okay.

Windows: ...

Me: Well, it's done.

Windows: Okay.

Me: So, it's installing.

Windows: Okay.

Me: You know, my OS came out after the 360.

Windows: Yeah.

Me: So why didn't you just include the driver with the OS?

Windows: I don't know.

Me: I have a lot of useless stuff from you already. Why didn't you just include it?

Windows: I don't know.

Me: Okay it's done.

Windows: Okay.

Me: Why the hell do you always want me to restart? The light is lit up. Why do I have to restart?

Windows: I don't know.

Me: Bill Gates doesn't even know why I have to restart.

Windows: Well...we don't talk anymore.

Me: Huh. Well, I'm not restarting.

Windows: Okay.

Me: I'm going to go play my game now.

Windows: We'll see...

Me: Wait.

Windows: What?

Me: Why's the program still there?

Windows: Which one?

Me: The one I installed the driver with.

Windows: I don't know.

Me: Why couldn't you just delete it after it installed?

Windows: I don't know.

Me: And what's this Windows Update thing?

Windows: Hm?

Me: You just installed the driver and already you need to fix it.

Windows: Well... This is an update just for you.

Me: You couldn't just put the latest version on your website?

Windows: No.

Me: You asked me what OS I was using.

Windows: Yes. Yes I did.

Me: So. You could have just the latest one for my OS there. On that special page. For me.

Windows: Yeah.

Me: Huh.

Windows: Yeah.

Me: You want me to restart again.

Windows: Yeah.

Me: Fine.

Windows: See you later.

Me: Whatever.

:: 2008 9 December :: 10.40pm

All moments, past, present and future, always have existed, always will exist.

The cat is both dead and alive.

queenofcarrotflowers

:: 2008 7 December :: 2.37pm

i am so unstable.
and i am so okay with that right now.

3 broke me | I think im broken

:: 2008 2 December :: 2.28am

crossposted
I am very blessed. I have a boyfriend who loves me (and lets me sleep and makes me bagels with cream cheese and turkey (when I don't feel well and when he thinks it sounds disgusting)) and whom I love. I have a family that despite my coming home from a semester in Europe and immediately moving out, still loves me.

I am blessed because I had two Thanksgivings. And I will have two Christmases.

I talked to one of the new student workers today. His father lost his factory job and his mother lost her greenhouse job. Downsizing. He had Spaghetti O's for Thanksgiving. In his dorm room. He says Christmas doesn't look too great either.

I left work crying.

I've always had a Christmas. I've always had a Thanksgiving. No matter how poor my parents said they were that year. I can't imagine not having one. But this kid did. This kid will.

:: 2008 26 November :: 10.14pm

I feel like I learn more about faith and feel better about faith in my Arabic class than I ever did in my Theology class.

In my Theology class, I was angry and upset that I was supposed to believe what he said I needed to. That I needed to obey the laws he said existed. Laws and rules I didn't think any god cared about.

In my Arabic class, I feel good about this god that I thought was mean and restrictive. I feel good about the world. Every day we have a religious discussion, even inadvertently.

I guess I'm not doing the Catholic thing anymore? I guess I haven't for a while. I like this God guy. I'm feeling things out but I'm a big fan of this non-denominational thing. I just hate religion so much. We'll see where this goes.

loserxdork

:: 2008 26 November :: 12.42am
:: Mood: nostalgic

Whoaa.
I can't believe I always forget about my Woohu. It's sad. This was my first journal site, and I love it. I just wish others here were still active. No one that I used to talk to is really on here and it makes me sad. If anyone is interested you can find me a few different ways.

FACEBOOK: Search for me (Marissa Fein) just tell me who you are, and that you're from WOOHU.
MySpace: http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=609403 - There is my link, send me a message and let me know who you are and that you are from WOOHU :)

AIM: Defectivexbeauty
YAHOO: lovesalosinggame

Livejournal (that I barely use): riss___
Melodramatic.com: dorktothemax

So, that aside things are going ok. So much has been going on in my life it would take me ages to update everyone. If you'd like to talk, just find me and I would be glad to indulge in some intelligent conversation, witty banter, or just shooting the shit :)

2 broke me | I think im broken

:: 2008 4 November :: 12.35am

Vote tomorrow, bitches.

3 broke me | I think im broken

:: 2008 25 October :: 10.41pm

Did I tell you I updated my ~~law blog~~ photoblog?

Because I did.

5 broke me | I think im broken

:: 2008 16 October :: 2.34pm
:: Music: Sons and Daughters

To everyone who will never see this:
(This isn't about you. If you think it's about you, it's not. It's about a certain vous.)

Not everyone's religion is your religion. You can't just push your views on me and I can't just push my views on you.

I believe in God. But my god seems to be a little nicer than your god. And if that makes me wrong, or a heathen or whatever, I don't care. I'm living in a happy, nice world with a happy, nice God who loves everyone, where free will means free happiness and where people are happy and love each other. If that's not a world you like, that's fine because it's my world. And I'm happy here.

I just don't understand why anyone would want people to not be happy.

I don't understand how what you do makes you happy. Does judging others make you feel better? Does alienating your friends and family make you happy? If it does, then that's fine. I'd only ever want you to be happy. But if it doesn't? Why do you keep doing it?

I love you all.

:: 2008 5 October :: 2.38pm

Nick's little sister got married last night. She turns 20 in November. As much of a horrible ideas as I thought getting married at that age was, after it all, I am so happy for Jess and Ryan. They obviously love and care for each other quite a bit and share the same ideas and faith. They're both silly and a little ditzy. And besides, people probably think the idea of Nick and I getting married is ridiculous too.

In the end, I had so much fun dancing and dressing up and partying and celebrating with them that none of it mattered. Not waking up at 7 to get my hair sprayed into a fake updo at 8:45. Not getting my makeup done and feeling guilty about Nick's mom spending over 200 dollars. Not the stupid fights we had only weeks before. The only thing that mattered was seeing Jess walk down that aisle yesterday and feeling so happy for her. For everyone.

Congratulations, you two. And good luck.

I love you all.

:: 2008 4 October :: 12.17am

So Nick's little sister is getting married tomorrow. I'm not sure how I feel about this yet. I am a bridesmaid. I am going to bed now.

:: 2008 24 September :: 2.38pm

UPDATE
OhMyGodSocietyIsCollapsingAndWeWillSoonBeDevouringEachOtherInTheStreets
LikeDogsAndACrippledOne-EyedBoyWillBEKingIfWeDon'tFixThisByNextWeek

This man deserves a world full of Emmys.