:: 2004 17 May :: 3.20 pm
:: Mood: outraged

am i retared!
this is the 3rd fucking time i earased this entry! god damn! no need to explain for the 3rd time!
linds

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:: 2004 14 May :: 3.13 pm

hey
it was the seniors last day. i'm pretty said. i'm gonna miss henry a lot. today he kept huging me and wouldn't let me go. he kept saying i love you so much. i love you w/ all my heart. then i come home and look at his picutres and it says i wish things could of worked out between us cause we would of been a good couple. i was like oh no!! i feel so bad! like to the extent i wanna cry i feel so much like a bitch.
now jon... i never thought i would say this lol. no he's a good kid. but he saved my ass by bringing me the prince of eygpt and he pointed somthing out that might be my huge problem. Maybe i'm looking in all the wrong places for a guy. it makes sence cause i have this "type" in my mind. maybe its all wrong. it may be total opposite then that. i don't know it was just somthing to ponder on. maybe the rich sailor guy or the hot flirt isn't for me. i have this feeling in side that i know it may not be. but what if its totally not for me! idk. we will just have to wait and see i guess.
ttyl bye!!
oh this weather sucks! I feel like i should be a duck - Mrs. dolbee.... what a nut
lol
love ya all!
linds

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:: 2004 12 May :: 9.05 pm

nothing i do is ever right. i try so hard. i try so hard to be involved w/ anything and everything. but no its never good enough for her. i don't understand. she was nothing in high school. she has nothing to compare me to. herself? i laugh. there was nothing there then a little girl who never broke the law or was involved w/ anything. she always blams it on grandma and grandpa. ok well that may have some of it. but you didn't see ANYONE in my family support me when i actrually thought singing was cool. but now that they have relized that i'm decent at it they will now support me. i hate it how they will only support me and give me praise on the things i'm "good" at at the time. right now they are bitching at me cause of my grades... last week they were saying how well i handeled all it. and were dissing my sailing shit. now that they reilize that i AM gonna be good at sailing and that i AM gonna be a girl who is actrually out on the race course sailing by them selves. so now they are like i think thats cool... and bitching bout my grades. i don't understand. i can't have a constant rate of which i'm good at. it would be hella awesome if they would just fuckin leave me alone! i dont' care when dick's boat goes in teh water... its not mine! and now that ryan got into a car ............. nm i'm crying i don't want to i'm going in my room nightt

linds

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:: 2004 11 May :: 9.38 pm

i wish i knew for sure if i had someone that i could turn to. i know i can turn to anyone.. but i want someone for sure!!
i want someone to love me and i want someone to hold me. i don't like hooking up... it's fun but it gets old.. i don't wanna do that. i want someone for always!
yeah just had to get that one out

ooh i storm is a coming... A huricane is comeing - Little Mermaid! hehe
linds

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:: 2004 6 May :: 7.27 pm

welll.. looks to me like the woohu money never got there.... so either it got lost or jess didn't send it in...
good bye woohu!
linds

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:: 2004 1 May :: 3.18 pm

this is when i really doubt things.... honestly why think that way? maybe thats just my opinion and/or personality. idk! it just kinda bugs me. oh well! not much i can do!
linds
going to fricanos tonight!! wanna come? be at my house 6 30! everyone is welcome!!! call me if you need directions! 696-4854. hehe fricanos!! lol hehe

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:: 2004 29 April :: 3.38 pm

how nice it would feel tohave someone love you. to have someone to run to.
i'm not saying that no one does i know a lot of people do... just not that "special" guy. oh well its too muchto have right now
not doing student senate next year. don't feel like. i hate being on the back burner.
linds

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:: 2004 28 April :: 5.39 pm
:: Mood: drained

everything there is to be sad bout
hey
today.... had to be the worst day in like a long long time. i was really proud of myself this year not getting depressed and not crying so much in the year. but today i just totally lost it. i havn't cried today... but i know its coming. i was so proud of myself that i didn't cry today.
Mally died... i loved that dog to death... and now shes gone! i never had really had a dog. Mally kinda just took that place. but now shes gone and theres nothing really i can do bout it.
my mom is a bitch. this mornign i just wanted to like punch her! i have like never had so much rage at one time agianst her. like it always gets worse but like i had so much rage in like the first 3 sec. it was nuts. and it was 6 45 in teh morning!
i took the meap today for math. went to math class. and taken a math exam after school. do you know how much math that is? oh i do. i added it up. thats over 4 hours and 30 min. of math!! thats like not healthy at all for you. i hate it! it just makes me dis like math even more.
on a brighter note. Jade and Chris are getting married this weekend :) i'm happy for them. i know they are really young but w/ jade having her baby soon it seems like the right thing to do. i'm excited :)
ohyeah my birthday was mon. lol. i'm 16.... no driving equals no cell..... how much does that suck!!! oh well. not much i can do bout it. ooh and i guess my mom told my dad that my "driving skills" have decreased. wtf?? yeah i was kinda mad ... like why don't you just tell me that!
well i'm out. i got mad homework to do. ttyl bye!!!
linds

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:: 2004 27 April :: 8.47 pm

idk... idk... im so confussed.... do i wanna do this this summer? do i really know him? idk! i just don't know. i wish i knew him better. i wish i knew bout his past. ifonly i could talk to people who know him. i wish there was a way to be like hey... let me talk to your friend.. what ever his name is... oh well everythign doesn't happen my way. what can ya do... i know i'll get screwed over. i know it and i won't be shocked when it happens. yeahi'll be sad. but i won't be surprised. i jsut wish there was a wya that i would know everything. oh well.

oh had fun in NYC it was great fun.
just wish i could know!!!!!

i'm out

give me some advice.. pleaseplease!! lol i'll take any pity too lol j/k
love ya
linds

4 comment. | comment

:: 2004 19 April :: 3.13 pm
:: Mood: sad
:: Music: cow boys like us

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:: 2004 16 April :: 10.43 pm

hey
i went to state Sand E today. i didn't think i did too well. mostly because of sight reading. but i still got a 2! which was a surprise in it self. lol. oh well ihad fun over all.
gotta go to kent city tomorrow and i get to swim! yay! hehe
linds

1 comment | comment

:: 2004 15 April :: 3.36 pm

blah
hey
when ever somthing happens i'm like oh yeah need to write that in my journal... but i never do. lol. oh well
today has just a ok day i guess. more bad then good. this moring.. threw up still went to school. :( then i've been loosing my voice and i'm really mad and sad because SandEis tommorw... STATE! like i'm excited but then agian i'm not anymore because i know i'm gonna suck. i'm just gonna mess my voice up and singas best as i can. but i know i won't do good in the final end because i can't sight read. i suck! i don't know why! i just can't do it. when ever we get one i already made up my mind that i'm gonna suck and then i do. i think thats part of my problem. so didn't feel good afterschool at all! i just wanted to go home and take a nap. but now its too late cause we have to leave in a bit to go have dinner w/ grandma, grandpa, aunt linda, and molly. oh well. but yeah i wanted to go home but katie and katie were talking to anthony and chad. so i just chilled w/ will and andy til they were ready. oh well! lol will.... do you think we can make it up the hill? lol. that was so funny. i spit all my water out. it was crazy. that was really the only funny part. well i do have homework and.. oh shit. i forgot my bio. book in my locker. shit. i'll have to go early tomorrow and study that. but yeah i have 3 quizes tomorrow. oh well. we will see how it goes. i can't even hardly sing. i can't even practice! ahh! but andy said he would bring me home tomorrow and let me steam my voice and change if i made him a girled cheese. lol. haha. ian says he's gonna come too. oh well i don't care. as long as i can do what i need to do before 3!
ooh yeah i need to figure out how many hours i have. mymom is so stupid she won't let me lie bout it. they don't even ask! it would be so much easier if i could just drive! oh well. we will see what happens.
well i'm gonna try to take a nap bye!
linds

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:: 2004 13 April :: 9.52 pm
:: Mood: angry

geese!
ah! i just filed out the same survey that jess did and it somehow earsed it all! that was a ton of typing and wasted sleep time! good lord!!! i'm mad.. good night
linds

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:: 2004 12 April :: 7.00 pm
:: Mood: crazy

spring break
so yeah spring break was last week yeah! had an awesome time. i went to flordia... it was great great fun. yeahi really don't wanna list all that we did... we had fun went to the beach went swimming yeah! lol
so yeah......... umm i was gonna say somthing but i forgot. lol hehe. ummmm idk! i'm sure i'll remember later!
bye
linds

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:: 2004 27 March :: 9.45 pm
:: Mood: annoyed

ok this is getting really old really fast. leave me out of it! i'm jsut giving advice. ehhhhhhhh i don't even wanna be apart of this. i don't understand a lot of it. this doesn't involve me so stop!
oh yeah... ok so lets just not tell me... thats fine. people are gay... they need to get things straight.
on a lighter note i went shopping w/ katie and got a cute pink purse. hehe. and we saw some boots that just turned us on. lol
linds

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