LOSERxDORK
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2003 8 December :: 7.35am
please leave me comments so that i feel loved!
[[ex.oh.ex]] <3
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LOSERxDORK
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2003 8 December :: 7.16am
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: ny state of mind- billy joel
friday 12/5- sunday 12/7
WELL this weekend was pretty good considering the snow and shit. friday i wasn't allowed out so bobby and cesar came over and then saturday i hung out with amy. sunday was MUCHO funno, lol. i went to the movies to see gothika with krista,amy,and melissa. it was FREAKY AS HELL, but it was cool. thennnn we went out to red lobster and ate there. that was fun too. after that we took a taxi to bops house and then hung out there and did shit like the cha-cha slide and the macarena and that was fun. we took lots of pictures. when i get them developed and get a scanner i will give you all the website with the pictures on it.
<3
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LOSERxDORK
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2003 7 December :: 3.26pm
:: Mood: gloomy
:: Music: i hate everything about you- 3 days grace
ugh
12.7.02 -> its been one year since marlo has been gone, i loved him with all of my heart
HE WILL BE MISSED DEARLY
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lookatmemynameisdustin
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2003 14 September :: 11.50am
so i might be going to jersey with rob...thats just crazy. i have no idea what could go on there (band wise). but the new band still needs a bass player and another guitar player sooooooo if you know anybody who is DEDACATED please send information in the form of a comment or at jeeblo@yahoo.com.
thank you,
dustin scott posthuma
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lookatmemynameisdustin
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2003 10 August :: 6.23pm
i dont have to say anything one of the greats.....just read
TAKING BACK SUNDAY
"The Ballad Of Sal Villanueva"
It's not that i don't trust you
i just know what you've been up to
and this dial tone is agreeing with everything i've had in mind.
and you've got your high as a kite tricks in the bag.
so as his eyes move down past your shoulders
and the shades start moving in the same direction
don't worry, i won't say a thing.
you can't blame a girl for sticking to what she knows.
i hope he takes his time
and i hope he keeps your eyes closed tight
and i hope that when he leaves,
you still smell him on your sheets
because i can, i can.
i hope he takes his time
and i hope he keeps your eyes closed tight
and i hope that when he leaves,
you still smell him on your sheets
because i can, i can.
if i could get to sleep
then, i guess you could stop pretending.
because if i didnt think you loved him
well then i would lay alone
and you've got your high as a kite tricks in the bag.
i hope he takes his time
and i hope he keeps your eyes closed tight
and i hope that when he leaves,
you still smell him on your sheets
because i can, i can.
i hope he takes his time
and i hope he keeps your eyes closed tight
and i hope that when he leaves,
you still smell him on your sheets
because i can, i can.
you're down for selling me out
while i play dumb,
but it's cool because i let you, you thought i'd never catch you,
you said "we're only friends." yeah, real good friends, i bet. i bet.
you're down for selling me out
while i play dumb,
but it's cool because i let you, you thought i'd never catch you,
you said "we're only friends." yeah, real good friends, i bet. i bet.
you're down for selling me out
while i play dumb,
but it's cool because i let you, you thought i'd never catch you,
you said "we're only friends." yeah, real good friends, i bet. i bet.
forget your legs around my hips.
forget your hands pressed on my back.
forget all the letters that i kept.
this is another i won't send.
forget your lips, your eyes, your thighs.
forget our one last kiss goodbye.
forget me staking out your house.
forget ive got you figured out.
forget your legs around my hips.
forget your hands pressed on my back.
forget all the letters that i kept.
this is another i won't send
5 comments |
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lookatmemynameisdustin
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2003 10 August :: 6.06pm
a line from:
brand new..."soco armetto lim"
"(you're just jealous cause I'm young and in love)
Eighteen forever
(your stomachs filled up but you're starved for conversation)
So we can stay like this forever
(you're spending all your nights growing old in your bed)
And we'll never miss a party
(AND YOUR TEARIN UP YOUR PHOTOS BECAUES YOU WANNA FORGET...ITS OVER)
cause we keep them going constantly
(you're just jealous cause I'm young and in love)
And we'll never have to listen
(your stomachs filled up but you're starved for conversation)
to anyone about anything cause it's all been done
(you're spending all your nights growing old in your bed)
and it's all been said
(and your tearin up your photos cause you wanna forget... it's over)
we're the coolest kids and we take what we can get "
good eh.
i just re-fell in love with brand new
i went to cedar point with my sister and her friends and had the best time (im also comparing it to staying at home so maybe it was just ok). i thought about certain people/things/goings-on and aftera while didnt bother me anymore i kind of forgot how the right people can make you do that...then i came home. but i wont get into that. anyways im going to try to keep this happy fix in tact. so bye.
:)ustin
^
thats pretty cool eh. i did it by myself.
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lookatmemynameisdustin
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2003 1 August :: 11.24pm
violent-yes
harsh-yes
neccary-yes
true-always
if you have anythign negitive to say about this please dont, im not trying to please you.
there are just a few people who have always wanted to read things by me well here is one (deeply inspired by saves the day). im sorry if i come off as weird.
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"your alot of talk"
On the way to your house the pavment aches, and things will never be the same now that he got past your front poarch.
So i will use the dimond from your ring (i bought you) to trace my hand on your bedroom window.
And i will stand on your steps and feel this bullet push my head back and hope the blood scatters on the wall to spell your name.
If i could tear out both your eyes and keep them with me tonight i would feel better knowing they would never meet.
And i would listen to both of you scream in pain but now i know id get some sleep.
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once again sorry if i come off "scary" its just a way of feeling. thank you......good bye.
~dustin scott posthuma
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lookatmemynameisdustin
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2003 29 July :: 1.13am
hi everyone,
this one might be long. just a warning. ignore spelling.
recently i have been critised for writing in my journal. ive gotten responses like "why the hell do you have to write in that, thats so gay" and "why do you have to rell strangers about everything thats gay"
well ive given that thought. and to my conclusion i belive that people write in this to incriminate others. they say things about people that they think other people should know(because they cant tell them themselves because ofdiffrent reasons like not being mature/approached)
for example:
leftoversacrs-me
********-im going to save his name because im a better person
leftoverscars: hey *****.....you dont have to talk to me . just wanted to say hi. thats all
:*****. who is this?
leftoverscars: dustin
*****.: your right, i don't have to talk to you
*****. signed off at 11:44:48 AM.
your probabaly thinking the same thing i am"what a dick"right ?
well your right because i still dont know what their mad about i keep on trying but i either get the finger or the cold shoulder. its rediculious.
anyways, im trying to prove a point but i got off track. i refuse to belive that people should have to keep secret about things like cheating , ECT. i think if a person does that to someone they deserive to
a)be humilated
b)be hurt back
c)be on the reciving end of some weird act of karma
im not saying im not guilty. im just losing it. you know what nevermind that whole thing i dont know where i was going.
so im staring a new band. with robby. itll be great i can feel it. better than that horrid peice of shit that was "bruce said checkers". hopefully itll work.
so if your bored call me. i dont want to lose you too.
-dustin
ps-wow reading over this im sorry you wasted your time. but thanks anyway.
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lookatmemynameisdustin
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2003 22 June :: 10.30pm
i will write a song that makes you cry and regret everything...everything and then you will feel yourself burn from the inside out
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lookatmemynameisdustin
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2003 22 June :: 10.03pm
:: Music: "only in dreams"-weezer
i went camping.
i was talking to my uncle about the book i was reading (the perks of being a wallflower) and he says "dont belive that" and i say "dont belive what" he says, referring to the title, "dont think you dont need friends, you arent really anybody without friends"
i disagree. ive pretty much lost all of my friends to one of my closest friends recently and i can tell you that it may be very very lonely at times i dont have to deal with ....anything. i talk to people sometimes and im very selictive about who i talk to now, (theres pretty much one person i talk to and occasionaly i still talk to the friend i lost but its still hard so i try to keep my distance) i dont think i can stand caring about what somebody said to me or wants to do to me or what they think of my relatoinship or (espically) who "did" things together. i really think thats what killed my relationship. everybody else.
there is just so many things that come with groups. id rather establish a strong connection with one person than feel akward coming into a group. there is so much drama. even in the band, it just got really stupid.
im sorry for going on. i just think people are too dependent on others, im not one to talk. its just sad. for everybody. really really sad.
thanks for listening,
dustin
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lookatmemynameisdustin
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2003 28 May :: 9.21pm
some song in which i relate:(more to come)
"my sweet fracture"-saves the day
Could you tell me the next time that you're choking?
'Cause I'll rush right over
to shove some dirt right down your throat
It's nothing I have against you
You're just a creep and
you can't remember the last five years
What's a bond if it dissolves in water?
I took a piss that lasted longer
than you and your manipulations
I called my mom last night
She said, "Sweetie, you don't need someone
who's more fleeting than fall"
'Cause don't you love those leaves?
Don't you wish the orange stayed forever
And Crickets sang in the night all through winter?"
And I thought, slow down, Chris
Think of all the time this jerk
has fucked you up and left you down
And hey, I choose my company
by the beating of their hearts
Not the swelling of their heads
Besides, I'd rather forget the days we spent
Than try to stay afloat in shallow water
"nightingale"-saves the day
And I will flail under these lights that seep down from the bitter sky tonight
and I will kick and beat my wrists together
and feel an ocean breathing waves, feel them licking at my face.
Ceilings don't exist and there are no floors beneath me.
If I were king of this night, would you become my queen?
And I hope, your majesty that you like your position.
I'll do everything I can to keep you by my side
and I'll stare off through the darkness to find us a kingdom.
Just kiss me before I go.
I'll have to walk a thousand miles just to find the ground deserving of your feet.
You could throw me down and walk on me
and I'd just look on through my love and through the haze.
And I hope, your majesty that you like your position.
I'll do everything I can to keep you by my side
and I'll stare off through the darkness to find us a kingdom.
Just kiss me before I go.
The nightingales are singing now.
They're calling out our marriage to our subjects on their knees.
Their jewelery is thrown into the air.
They sigh at their release as their shackles hit the ground.
The trumpets call out now.
We're home at last.
And I hope, your majesty that you like your position.
I'll do everything I can to keep you by my side
and I'll stare off through the darkness to find us a kingdom.
Just kiss me before I go.
yup......
3 comments |
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lookatmemynameisdustin
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2003 27 May :: 8.02pm
if you ever had anything to say to me just say it ...i dare you
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lookatmemynameisdustin
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2003 10 May :: 11.33pm
im hot
its a proven fact
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lookatmemynameisdustin
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2003 7 May :: 6.13pm
dear robby (in reply to your most recent entry),
we obviously need to talk. that was a fucking joke about the other band (ithink i made that very clear by inviting you and kevin to join) and then i proceded to say things like "i dont like the music we play" because its the fucking truth we wrote all those songs in a hurry and theres so many problems with them there horrible. also this bullshit with jeff and sam i CANT FUCKING BELIVE nobody was telling me about (i know the people who were there). i know i did some bad shit to jeff but him doing that to me makes him a better person? and if anybody thinks im a badguy in this situation ... fuck you...fuck jeff...fuck everyone who i thought would be a good enough person to tell me, and didnt,fuck you
and if you were just going to wait till i came and apoligised to you thats pretty stupid if youre giong to have a problem with me say something dont have me going back and forth between stupid letters
xoxo,
common fucking courtesy
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lookatmemynameisdustin
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2003 3 May :: 6.47pm
i think i just felt my heart break
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