munkysaurus
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2005 8 August :: 4.32am
Double sided breast tape...
Hello...Mr. Journal.
Blahity. blahity. blahity.
Still working at Wendy's. I seem to be running into a lot of people I haven't seen in some time. They all seem to come up to me and go "You workin'. Oh, yeah, where?" That's where I interject and sigh, a yes, and a Wendy's. Then I light up and cigarette and stomp out whatever authority or dignity I was holding during that conversation.
Oh, and the ladies. Ha. mofucka's. I've never had some much success and so much pathetic loss. In, well, probably since the last time I put some effort in this shit. Heh. I remember back in the day when I'd try to figure this whole thing out. But, I'm down right stumped.
Me: "You have a boyfriend."
Bystandard: "Well"...pause as she sucks in a deep breath, and I slap myself in the face waiting for the inevitable life story, "he pisses me off. blah. blah. We broke up. blah. blah. He doesn't ever (insert adjective here that has either to do with shallow displays of affection or overall acknowledgement). I still love him, want to marry him, will you just fuck me to make him jealous.
Me: So, I was kinda lookin' to go have some pizza or a movie. You know, since this is kinda like the first time I've ever talked to you.
bleh. whatever. smoke some stoogers and bang my head on the wall.
fuckity fuck fucker fuckmook.
Saw Ms. K at the pondscum-atorium. She's got a ball and chain. I don't know why she still talks to me. I'm not going to try.
Let's see how things go within a couple months. I'm hopeful.
Well, the hay has a restraining order on you, so try the sheets...for hitting. g'night or morning. Hello. goodbye...
Dustin
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brokenmentality
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2005 8 August :: 10.47am
keegan just left for work, i suppose i should do something productive like mow the lawn.... i'll just wait for him to do it! :)
my senior pictures went pretty good. we were there for 3 and a half hours and he's still not done. so tuesday we're going to the beach, and then we still have set up another indoor session. and yesterday i came to the realization that my cheeks are entirely to fat. i really really dont like them. i told my mom that im gonna get lyposuction done on my cheeks.. laughs... its true.
we went to see keegan at work last night.... simply HAD to give him a hard time. he's a good waitor. my cousin audra was working too.. so she sat down with us for quite a while... said she was gonna have it out with keegan cuz he took her family and we should have been sitting in HER section. giggles* audra said i was the talk of server alley last night..... ohhhhh yeah.
when he got out of work we went and got life and guess who... gotta love the classics. what nerds we are.
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brokenmentality
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2005 7 August :: 9.28am
yesterday was one of the best days this whole summer.
we had our grand haven parade... and let me tell ya, it was HUGE! but it was so much fun before hand because we got to walk around and hand out massive ammounts of red flannel buttons to the other floats and there are some CRAZY people! one of the floats was a huge coast guard boat, and all the queens and court members that were around all got up onto the boat with the coast gaurd men..... *mmmm* and got a very lovely picture taken with all the guns on the boat.... i dont know it was just sooo fun. and the parade itself was huge... at one point one of the guys from WGVU jumped on our float with his camera crew and asked me all these questions...... i was like woohu! *giggles.
my mom and keegan made it to the parade just in time, they werent even there for 10 minutes when my float went by. after the parade we went to my uncle mark and aunt pattys (me, my mom, keegan and shelby) and then we came back into cedar.. by the way.. i have MASTERED the art of changing in the car. its pretty difficult to change out of those red flannel dress and all the stuff with it without flashing all the other cars..... laughs* anyways..... we came back here to freshin up and all that good stuff.. then me and keegan went over to his house for jennys shower.. jenny is keegans cousin, and she's marrying my cousin ben... they've been together since the 8th grade... it was kind of odd being at keegans house for a bridal shower for my cousins fiance... a little ironic. but it was so cool, cuz my aunt susie was there... so i was in like my second home, eating really good food talking to my OWN family! te he he..... but NO this does not make us related... and besides he's adopted... mwah ha ha ha.
after the shower me keegan and emma went back to my house to pick up shelby (she's four) and the 4 of us went to chucky cheese. we got 160 tokens... holy cow! it was sooooo much fun. one of the funnest things we've done in the summer! *laughs.. we're such nerds... but it was cool because it was me and keegan and our sisters. it was sweet and all that jazz..... :)
OH yeah... and between the four of us shelby had 1102 tickets to choose stuff with.... *shakes head. its funny cuz we spent 30 dollars on tokens for probably 5 dollars worth of stuff..... oh well, we got good pictures and those are "priceless" *laughs...... OH the cornyness.
i have my senior pictures today.... they BETTER still be today. they got reschedualed last time. im excited.. im super tan right now. well... i think anyways *shrugs.
yancy didnt make it out to grand haven yesterday.... the traffic was to bad, he never would have made it.... ahh well.
when we left chucky cheese we went to target and i bough shelby this disney princess game... well the setup took forever, so me, shelby, my mom and keegan were up till midnight because she HAD to play it before she went to sleep. she's so cute.
alright, i've babbled on enough. i dont like writing long descriptive entires.. AND i dont like reading them... but whatever
have a good day loves.
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brokenmentality
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2005 3 August :: 11.53pm
i went with keegan down to blues tonight... its such an exciting atmosphere... *giggles.
im never down town.... but TONIGHT... oh man, tonight we got REAL fresh squeezed lemonade, i witnessed hours of incredible break dancing, and a big fat girl and her gang of trailor trash started some drama with this awesome girl that can breakdance.. i mean comon.. if i was fat and ugly and "on fucking probation" i wouldnt be starting something with a girl who has every breakdancer on the floor telling these nasty girls to go home..... bahh. some people make me sick! i mean there were little kids around... and keegan told them that and they were like "fuck the little kids" im thinkin "who the hell is you!" (te he... chris rock stand up is so funny) but anyways.. that was about it. keegans gonna teach me to break dance... *laughs.... i'll run this shit. *cheezy music plays..... "do do do do do do do, jump on it, jump on it" gotta love that song......
then after we left there we stopped over to gorters house played some pool which we lost terribly to him and taylor..... oh and all the gorter drama... if you dont know ryan and arent affiliated with him.. leave it alone. its none of your buisness... i dont see why it matters so much.
idiots.
anyways... long day... gotta call my favorite asian since its an early night for us. usually i wouldnt be home for another couple hours.... this sucks... but its all good. sometimes sleep is good.
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brokenmentality
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2005 25 July :: 10.13pm
im on keegans laptop... hes in the shower... oh the damage i could do right now... mwah ha ha.
today we had our red flannel pictures done at aspen... its so sad because it makes the end seem so final. the truth is, it'll never end. the memories, and friendship, and sisterhood will never fully go away. and i'll always look back at this past year and be in awe of the amazing experience the 5 of us had.
i've been gathering all my senior picture clothes. greg.... one of the photographers told me to bring my whole closet... i told him he shouldnt have said that! i hope they turn out good... if any of you still need to get your pictures done, or know anybody who's looking to get professional pics done like wedding, family, whatever... let me know so i can get them some discouts at studio 630.
"yesterday wasnt good"
hmph speak for yourself.
anyways.... off i go... keegans back.
stacy i love you. i stopped in to see you.. and ended up talking to your parents for like 10 minutes... i've missed them. and your house. and your wonderful drawer. and the spray butter on the pop corn. and those goofy little hampster things. and the dead bunny. and sleeping out on your tent until it started raining. and porch communicating. and craving arbys late at night at wonderfully having a way to get it. and sitting around your house all day waiting for SOMEONE to bring us to the mall. but most of all... i just miss you. and the long talks we always seem to have. DB4L... i am ALWAYS here whenever you need me ok? you have my number and i have a wonderful ringtone for you on my cell phone. i wanna HEAR it damn it! lets get together soon. with or without the boys.... lets just get together!
ok... hamburgers are calling my name... keegan made them for me with one arm.. poor doll.
night.
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brokenmentality
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2005 22 July :: 2.24am
idiot
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brokenmentality
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2005 15 July :: 7.27pm
trouble in paradise? not even close.
its so nice being able to handle our arguments as adults... there is NOTHING we cant work through, because thats just how we are. i fight with him like he's my brother... most of the time its only because i care so much about the decisions he makes, and he guards and protects me like a little sister... and from time to time gives me a little tough love so i can figure out on my own what exactly it is that i want... but more than that we're best friends.. which keeps everything running soooo smoothly. only THEN can i say we're dating... because everything else comes first. hes my best friend before anything... and thats such an amazing thing.
central air is a beautiful thing.
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brokenmentality
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2005 13 July :: 11.56am
i'm meeting some more of my family on saturday... what an odd thing to say..... seems to me its been an overdue meeting.. but whatever, ya gotta start somewhere.
alyssas comming over after work tonight... we're gonna be all girly and figure out what i should where for my senior pictures... she was a model last for the photography place that i'm gonna be modeling for.. i go in saturday morning to get all the information... alyssa said she saved hundreds on her senior pictures, so im really excited.
i cant go to blues cuz i have to work, and theres no way im gonna drive down there and get lost downtown and then walk by myself to where they break dance..... but next wednesday....
i really need to concentrate on losing some of the roundness of my face, and belly, and legs.... .blahhhh... now isnt the time for a self-meltdown. ahh well... people always tell me how cute my cheeks are.. maybe i should start believing them... riiight.
it kindof sucks to know that she left me in the dark about this... i dont understand her. things used to be..... well hmmm, i shouldnt get into it.. because obviously things will never be the same, we will never be us again, and sometime in our far future, occasional cards at christmas will recap some of the memories that we'll neglect to recall otherwise.
i got my hair highlighted... nobody ever takes my advice.. but seriously go to Colleen at Xscape salon in rockford, she's the only person i'll go to for my hair and its SUPER affordable. i get two colors done in my hair all throughout.. not just on top and it only costs me about 45-50 dollars... and my hair is almost as long as my back... GO THERE!
yay for keegan getting a job at logans! im so excited for him.. now he works at our restaurant! woohu!
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brokenmentality
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2005 12 July :: 2.32am
me and keegan had a bonfire tonight... just the two of us.
we ran into town and got stuff to make smores, and it was dark so we had the whole "camping" experience goin on.... it was wonderfull.
i do believe that im becomming obsessed with pigs in a blanket.. keegans mom makes them all the time *for me...te he he* and im gonna become the name of the little piggys... or perhaps just that.. a little piggy. *giggles and wrinkles nose up all cute-like
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2005 9 July :: 11.22am
im getting my hair highlighted today... i went tanning last night..... im like geeeeze whats getting in to me!?
must be the senior pictures.
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brokenmentality
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2005 8 July :: 2.22pm
we got alot accomplished today.
im watching shelby... on top of everything else....
buuutttt..... keegan came over this morning and the three of us watched scooby doo... and then he mowed our front yard.. which is a PRETTY big front yard, i cleaned my room and bathroom, organized my red flannel box, made lunch on the grill, and keegan just brought our screen door in to be fixed... now i have to drop shelby off at her babysitters, go to work, and then tan so i can be nice and dark for my senior pictures..
ahh... we're almost seniors....
i think i have this disease where i cant stop spending money at abercrombie and hollister... its terrible... 100 dollars on 3 shirts... im sure thats not healthy!
mmm... but they DO look good.
well... i should probably clean up. im lookin pretty scary right about now.......
ohhhhh... me and keegan went to the lakes mall yesterday and then to grand haven.. it was nice. the sun felt so good... so what if the water was to cold and even kind of hurt.... it was a good day.
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2005 7 July :: 12.37am
i went to blues tonight after my modeling consultation... it was pretty cool. they guys from 61syx are pretty awesome.. i still get nervous when keegan does flips.. esp when its on concrete and he's tryin some for the first time... but dammnn is it so cool!
i just got home... im grounded right now... so i guess my moms definition of grounded must be "be home by midnight" we'll have to slowly work back up to 2-3 in the next few days... laughs* being grounded isnt half bad.... i think i can spare a couple of hours for a few days... no longer then that though... hmph.
my cell's been dead for like a week..i just havent gotten around to charging it... and damn.. i should charge my camera cuz we're going to the beach tomorrow.... mmmmm... looks at complicated bateries and such..... nawww not complicated, more like "takes effort" and im tired so NO... hmph.... .im such a baby.
keegan had his interview at Logans today.... we're in there at LEAST 2-3 times a week, so since he's looking for a waitor job... figured HEY why not work at our resturant?! i say OURS because im sure if it wasnt for our frequent visits.. they would be out of business.. FER sure.
mmmm keegans dad made us steak today.... i hadnt had steak in a LONG time... then me, emma, and his dad played trivial pursuit... it was fun. keegan wouldnt play.... jerk.
i can see emma and me becomming really close... we're already pretty close and i KNOW she likes me alot.. his whole family does... sounds cliche, but his house is really like my second home. his mom even labled a part of his room "Erika Dawns" lol.... and then grouped all my stuff there... it was cute. i had kind of a dissapointment today, so right after i called my mom, i called keegans mom.... i just think thats so coooooool! ugrahh! i love them all... except keegan *winks....
i love how everyone is always like... you're so in love, or something like that... and we're like nooooo we're not.. not yet anyways. because its true. we arent... why rush something thats already so beautifull? but i sure am loving every second of falling in love with that boy.
night angels....
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brokenmentality
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2005 4 July :: 12.26am
oh goodness...
boys and their need to "fix" everything..
bobby, bobby, bobby
im so fortunate to know him. both him and vince, its crazy... because if i had never met keegan, i wouldnt have met these two amazing people.... and even though i've only known them for about as long as i've known keegan.... i feel a need to protect them because i love them and they love me and its like they're my big brothers. this big wonderful protective circle... its beautifull.
we're gong to watch fireworks in grand rapids tomorrow... getting away from sandlake... blahhhh. im excited, i've never seen grand rapids fireworks, AND this is my first fourth of july with someone... i've seen fireworks with ex-boyfriends, not on the fourth though cuz i was in Disney World... and keegan doesnt remember ever spending the fourth with anyone... so this counts as his first too... the way we look at things... if you look back and either dont remember or realize an experience was nothing like the ones we share together... then they dont really count.. because they lack in comparison.. so much that they dont exist. we both have pasts, we both have fairly long relationships under our belts, and we can BOTH happily say that THIS is our first relationship.... because nothing else compares. its just an amazing feeling.... i thought i felt this way once..... but the way i feel when we're together is mind blowing.... it totally replaces everything i ever felt. i mean yeah.. i thought i was in love once.... but the way i feel when im with keegan is so much stronger then i EVER felt... and we're not even in love yet! its a beautiful beautiful thing.....
*sighs......
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brokenmentality
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2005 3 July :: 2.20am
me and keegan saw bewitched tonight... it was pretty good. i love magic. then after that me, emma and keegan went into sandlake.. this is at about 10:30 im guessing... we had more fun on the carride there then we did at the carnival.. the way we see it... the trashy people hang out at the carnival.. the COOL people make a few appearences and then leave.... laughs* you can only walk by so many girls in belly shirts, bleached blonde hair, and nose rings before you've had enough to vomit. ughhh.. laughs.
we were jammin though... DMX.. ohhh yeahhh.... i'd say when it comes to dancin.. i give keegan a run for his money... its true. *giggles.
we listened to this chris rock comedy thing on keegans ipod yesterday, it was like an hour and a half long.. .sooooo funny.
yeah... keegan keegan keegan... i know.
but hey, i didnt see him for 6 days, he's my best friend, and part of me just wants to brag about how amazing my boyfriend is.
*sighs.....
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2005 28 June :: 8.35pm
keegans mom is picking me up at 10 so we can go get keegan from the airport... he was supposed to be home by 4 today but his flight got delayed... so now he should be in by 11:30..... mmmmmm, darn this weather makin me wait.
yayyyy... i have a consultation with studio 630 about being one of their models... my friend alyssa was their top model last year and her pictures just turned out amazing.. im crossing my fingers..
i should probably put some clothes on.
yeah.. thats generally a good idea..........
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