:: 2002 7 December :: 9.41 pm

Nostalgic confessions in drop fuck...
God, I wish my life was easier. I wish I could just reconcile with myself and just toss all my worries and problems out the window. Things are becoming so complicated, so ambiguous to me. The world is running laps around me, while I stay at a slow-paced jog. sigh. There's so much to do in the near future, but I have to sit back here and wait for it to smack me across the face. Am I preparing for it? Hell no! I'm doing just the opposite and vindicating myself from things that are ultimately inevitable. Eh, what do ya' do?

Anyway, today came unexpectedly. Me and the Munky Master went to Guitar Center and played some jams there. Then to the mall. Ryan would yell "zing!" really loud, then I'd follow up with a "bam!". Totally scared the general crowd shitless. Saw the Shermanator. Still a fuggin' security guard. We got some McDonalds prior, where developed the habit of throwing fries in the overhanging lights. We progressed to throwing half eaten burgers and chicken nuggets. Then before we left, Ryan dumped our left over fries in there. We went over to Ryan's sisters and ate a second dinner of spaghetti then played "old school" Mario for an hour. Nicole, Ryan's sister, is actually pretty cool. So is Dan (her husband). Then we stopped my Molly's, she wasn't home. So we went to my old elementary school and s-boarded around. He finally decided to call it a night, and we drove home.

Point and Shoot

:: 2002 3 December :: 6.40 pm
:: Music: Tweaker - Linoleum

Point and Shoot

:: 2002 1 December :: 4.06 pm

Take a hit of cigarette, then take a swig of pepto bismol...
Sigh, I have an F in every class. That's a first for me. I wouldn't know how to get out of a situation like that. But, I have some solutions that are risky to take, and probably won't end in the best results.
Tomorrow, school starts again. I'm totally ready for it. I'm just afraid to go home. I'd be the happiest person on earth if I didn't have to. I could go without seeing her face, or ever hear her fucking voice again for the rest of my life.
Bleh.

Point and Shoot

:: 2002 29 November :: 2.44 pm
:: Music: Ben Kweller - Make It Up

Point and Shoot

:: 2002 25 November :: 4.44 pm

"They" don't like blue, and if you have blue, they don't like you...
Got in a car accident today.
An old lady helped us out. Her name was Kathy. Thanks Kathy.
We sat in the back of the pattiwagon for a little over two hours while everything was settled.
Me and Dan both got whiplash, and I've got a major headache.
Jesus Christ, ten more feet and we have pretty much been dead.
Bleh, this wasn't supposed to happen.

1 Shot | Point and Shoot

:: 2002 19 November :: 1.24 pm

They're blue, not black...
"Cover Your Eyes"

Gorp!
Blorp!
Plop!
Flop!
Spurt!
Holy spit!
Is that a gelatenous monster,
taking a shit?
--------------------
"The Envious Dendretian"

In the pasts, the presents, the futures
Lives a girl covered in sutures
With her long, shimmering, sable hair
Almost transparent, billowing in the air

Her mold is full of leaves,
in her bosom, where the worm grieves
Her hands made of branches, covered in silk
Her footprints leave trails of crimson milk

If you saw her, her shell of crevices and cracks
Her eyes contrast diffrent shades of greys and blacks
Her barbed legs are like a pale cactus,
which she uses to glide above us

She consumes the clouds, the stratus, the nimbus,
and dreams of the day she can live among us
dreams, and beams at the sky
Contemplating the day she can live among us
Tumbles, and rumbles with the fungus
Telling it of the day she can live among us
--------------------
"The Nicotinian's Assessment"

Quit smoking!
Ha ha,
you must be joking
That's like telling an elephant,
to stop snorting crack
That's like telling a black person,
to stop being black
cough!
cough!
hack!
Fuck,
I gotta quit smoking

Point and Shoot

:: 2002 18 November :: 2.30 pm

Aquatic communications 101...
"An Ode to Ectoplasmatic Manifestations"

The ghosts
ahh!
the ghosts
I like those the most
They haunt your house,
and eat your spouse
ahh!
the ghosts

They live in your diner,
and make things, oh so shinny-er
They cook turkeys in under 15 minutes
with their transluscent plasmatic touch
They hug you, and snuggle you
ahh!
oh so much
They'll beat you,
and eat you, and...
Hey, Now I'm a ghost!

1 Shot | Point and Shoot

:: 2002 14 November :: 9.27 pm

Trout...
I'm down here,
looking up on the superior objects that almost seem intangible.
And, wow, have I learned a lot, a lot!
In some instances, I just want to stay down here, because I've become comfortable.
In this position, I have nothing to loose.
And I know what it's like to loose everything.
Who needs the things I need, when your sure what the sign says at the end of the road.
I just need to tell my ego that his eviction notice is in his mailbox, and to reside in a person like me. Is all too redundant.

The most crucial thing to learn down here. Is that in order for some people to be happy, others have to suffer. For some people to be successful, others have to fail. Heh, modern Conficiousism.
Bleh.

Point and Shoot

:: 2002 12 November :: 9.42 pm
:: Music: Ben Kweller - Family Tree

4 Shots | Point and Shoot

:: 2002 11 November :: 2.53 pm

Headbumps eat the raptormakers...
The kindred souls.
The ones who say the least.
And hurt the most.

Point and Shoot

:: 2002 10 November :: 2.42 pm

You've violated the weather laws...
There's nothing in this world for me. I've wrapped it in a nice ziplock bag and flushed it right down the toilet. It's all my fault for thinking I could go somewhere in life. 'Course there's that little devil standing on my shoulder telling me the things I want to hear. The things I should've ignored. I just want to run away from it all, from everyone and everything. It's all just one big free-for-all fuck up.

2 Shots | Point and Shoot

:: 2002 6 November :: 4.35 pm

Melancholy, nevermore...
Your miserable
Your ignorant vendetta against the world just adds flame to your fire
You fucking idiot!
Why must I suffer?!

"Your worthless, you know that?"

It's not my fault that all your fucking problems stem from your own issues. It's like, you make yourself unhappy by doing irrational things. 'Cause those self-inflicted things make you mad, the whole "god" damned world has to fucking suffer for it.

Well, in my mind, it's a permanent "fuck you" to you. Today, you crossed the line. I just hope you can descend above your oblivion and learn how fucked up you really are.
You dumb bitch.

Point and Shoot

:: 2002 5 November :: 7.38 pm

Who needs capellaries...
My mom spits out words like a snake spits its digested food at its enemy. That's not just some random analogy either, when she gets mad her vileness is beyond any chart's magnitude. She told a phone company solicitor, that if he didn't stop calling she'd kill herself.
Fuck this world.

1 Shot | Point and Shoot

:: 2002 4 November :: 11.53 pm

Sssss...
Eh, today hasn't really gone very well. Just the overall atmosphere of all that's been floating around my head for the past 14 hours of my conciousness. Just one shit storm after another. To say the least, I'm sick of wearing a smile on my face that's hollow and flaccid. Nothing is right, nothing is ok, and I'm sick of telling myself that it is. It's like, at one point, the world will look nice, only to come down on me harder and harder every revolution. The worst part is seeing other people happy, and then feeling jealous towards them. I just want my slot in the world to slip myself in, securely. Heh, whatever.

1 Shot | Point and Shoot

:: 2002 3 November :: 8.41 pm
:: Music: Nine Inch Nails - The Day The World Went Away

Point and Shoot