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2005 31 August :: 9.02pm
:: Music: JamisonParker- Dusk, The Day After
Holy Carp! Yes. . . Holy carp.
My mom just said that she had a customer from Otsego or something say that gas was $3.80 over there!!! I just wish I could boycott it but that wouldn't do anything except leave me stranded.
Sometimes I just get this overwhelming rush of joy and happiness with life. Like everything is going to be okay and everything is going to work out with my life. Everything will fall into place. I am going to get an awesome job, I am going to classes I like, I will be 18 soon, and more importantly, even if those things don't work out (except me being 18), I am with the person I love and he will stand by me and help me through everything.
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2005 31 August :: 8.23pm
:: Music: Gimme Dat
I LOVE CHARLIE!
Hmmm....GUESS WHAT!
Chef Simpson called me today and I have an interview on friday!!!!!!!!
WHOOOOOOOOOOOO
It's my dream job. Seriously. Awesome. I could have a chance of going to Italy sometime. Maybe after a long time of working there, but still. Awesomely awesome. This will be my 5th job!!! I'm only 17 and this will be my 5th job. It's okay, it's experience. I've never gotten fired (knock on wood)
I can't wait till classes start actually. It's cool. For my birthday we're all goin' to margarita grill and then I'm getting a tat. For sure.
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2005 30 August :: 10.28pm
:: Music: Boys Night Out - Purging
I'm feeling kind of weird. Anxious-like. Earlier today I layed in bed and knew I had places to go and that I should get up and I wanted to, but then I didn't want to leave the house at all, I just wanted to read. Ergh. I visited Ash at work today and dodged el bosso. Then I worked out. Then I went to Applause catering. Head...hurts. I think I'm going crazy. I just don't know what I want to do ever!
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2005 29 August :: 10.38pm
I love you more than words can say.
I am so tired. I woke up around 2 this morning then went back to sleep until 4:30 when I had to get up to go open at work. Blahhh. I didn't feel very well this morning. Uh oh. Eh I never feel very well in the morning. I saw Char later on today. I got him a grill. Yay! Then I worked out at the gym for like 15 minutes because they were closing. So I'm going again tomorrow and I'm going to Applause to send my resume and hopefully talk to Chef Simpson. Then I'm going to chill because I need time to relax before next week. Classes start. Eek.
On Saturday Char and I went down to CC and all the buildings were locked because we went too late. Ugh. But one of my classes is in the North building and I like the grassy plaza in front of it I will be there a lot I'm sure. And in the ATC building. VISIT ME IN THE CAFE IN OCTOBER! Ya.
That's about it.
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2005 28 August :: 7.52pm
We're back together. We got back together on Friday morning.
Everything is wonderful. We are more in love now than ever before. It's like love makes more sense now, in a subconsious way. Like everything is brighter. Anyway, things are really good. I am so in love with Charlie. I can't wait till we get married :-D hehe
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2005 25 August :: 11.55pm
I was looking at my memories and I had some quotes I liked:
-“Will you lend yourself to beauty that will horrify? Let me hide within your black, the still inside your eyes.”
-“I traced all the letters on all of your letters. You never wrote in perfect lines and I never wrote you perfect lines.”
-“Under that threat of sky we lie together, why care about the weather. It only ends in dark.”
-“Flesh seems thicker, sandpaper tears corrode the film, and I need you now somehow and you’re my obsession.”
-“Maybe you’ll kill yourself before you get a turn, maybe I’ll fall in love and never learn.”
-“And whispered rumors of the way you wear you’re black eye like a badge of honor, soaking in the sympathy of friends who never loved you nearly half as much as I do (but irony is for suckers).”
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2005 25 August :: 11.07pm
If you can't find it within yourself to understand that I was coming from my heart, not my mind, and you can't find it within yourself to even talk to me about it first...then...
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2005 12 August :: 11.15am
Here's some pictures...
Baby Katriana- She's a cutie!
~~~
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2005 11 August :: 9.57pm
HMMMMMM
I say that a lot. I almost got in a STUPID accident on my part.... Yeah that sucks. Char saw the whole thing too. hehe. I feel stupid. Anyway, I am just feeling good about things. Class will be starting soon. I guess I can kind of post my schedule. (I'm kinda guessing)
Mon---- Bakery/Deli Operation 8:50am-1:50 pm
Tue---- Bakery/Deli Op 8:50-1:50pm......Menu Planning/ Nut. 2-3:30..... Business Eng. 5:45-9pm (BUSY!)
Wed---- Bakery/Deli Op 8:50-1:50
Thurs--- Bakery/Deli Op 8:50-1:50......... Menu Planning/ Nutrition 2-3:30pm
Fri-------Bakery/Deli Op BLAH BLAH BLAH......
Sat.------ First Aid 7:45-11:45
I actually think I got my schedule right. Yeah. It's full. Plus work. Plus Char. Plus friends. I go in at 1:30 tomorrow. Yay! I have to talk to a lawyer. blah. And I was also a witness today at work. Interesting...
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2005 10 August :: 11.21am
Well. I work in about 2 hours. Last night went well. Charlie came to visit me :-) <3 I just have this feeling. This really great feeling. Just complete love. It's beautiful. I feel really great. Today is going to be a good day.
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holiday
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2005 9 August :: 11.05am
:: Music: Small Brown Bike
So... Things have been going pretty steady. I work at 1:30 today. That's preeeetty late. I was supposed to hang out with Jane and Ashley tonight but I don't think it'll work out tonight. Charlie hasn't been able to sleep so I don't know what to do. The new kitty Abby is doing really well. She's getting along with all the other kids and singing "Reunited and it feels so good!"
Maybe baby. I'm going to wait to see. Cooking thing is goin'. My back has been hurting like a crazy mofo, like before. I slept sooooo much today.
This is all just a rambling entree.
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2005 8 August :: 10.03pm
It's going to feel good to sleep for a while. Oh so good.
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2005 7 August :: 6.08pm
Holy crap! I just spent $600 online. bleh.
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2005 6 August :: 11.34am
Char and I saw Dukes last night. YEEHAW
okay. that's enough. Seriously funny movie.
"Do you know how fast you were going?"
"Uh....eight?"
"Eight"
"Officer, isn't the speed limit 10?"
"Yes"
~~~~~
I didn't have to work today! Hoo-ray!
I got to sleep in and it felt fan-fucking-tastic! Charlie and I get a new kitty today from his mom's. So it's not really new...and it's not really a kitty anymore, but still. I love Abbs. And we shall have to see about a little something else. Maybe by tomorrow. Good talk last night. I mean, not while it was going on but I feel better now.
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2005 4 August :: 10.46pm
Oh gosh wow. This feels so weird.
I need some sleep.
~
P.S.- Kyle Kelly works w/Road Commission??? Crazy! Did anyone else see him today?
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2005 2 August :: 9.15pm
:: Music: Belle & Sebastian-"Piazza, New York Catcher"
this anxiety is killing me. i like this song though. it's really nice.
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2005 2 August :: 9.12pm
Last summer I started reading The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold on vacation. I got it today. I started reading it. I can't put it down, once again. The only problem is, I started reading Haunted by the one, the only, Chuck Palahniuk. Oh man oh man. If the hardest decisions in life were which book to read, it'd just be great. Damn.
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2005 2 August :: 9.02pm
MMMMM...Honey Wheat Thins...MMMMM
Well. I have a lot to talk about. Work has been going quite well now! I like working with Ashley. She's so nice and fun and easy to talk to. I am really sad about what's going on with Jane right now. She could have cancer :-( She's only 19! I worked later than I was supposed to. I had 9 hours of sleep. I am exhausted though. I just feel semi-not like me. It's weird. And school is starting soon. AHHH I need to chill. Just chill. And we'll see...
P.S.- I love my Charlie <3<3<3<3
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2005 31 July :: 10.34pm
I think this could really be happening...............................
Anyway, today was nice. Day off. Char came over and hung out and then my grandparents came over and we had a bbq. Then Char and I layed in bed and watched t.v. and it just felt nice. I remember a couple years ago when I seriously couldn't wait to get a job. How crazy was I??? I mean, having money is good most of the time, but now...I will be working for the rest of my life. Give or take a little time off. I just keep hoping I win the lottery. I am so going to. HAHAHA. It'd be awesome though. Tomorrow is work, once again. But for anyone who has been feeling like I have been, about how it seems never-ending and stupid. What I tell myself to get me through is that no matter what, I will be able to go to sleep again, go home again, do what I want sometime. For some reason I was just feeling like I would never be leaving work. You just have to really cherish the time you do have. And now that schools over, time has been FLYING by. Seriously. Well, I am going to sleep soon. G'night.
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2005 28 July :: 1.14am
Wow. Interesting. Bowling was fun. Getting lost was semi-fun. Except I was driving by myself for an hour and 20 minutes. Eh.
I had a blood test done today so I get the results tomorrow so we shall see. I'm so tired. BBVD FRIDAY!!!! YAY CHARLIE!!! hehe I love you <3<3<3
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2005 27 July :: 1.49pm
Office Space says everything.
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2005 26 July :: 10.23pm
:: Music: Modest Mouse- You're The Good Things
I LOVE THIS SONG!
And the help's ain't short
When you're diggin' your grave now
And the help's not short
SHORT!
I'll help you dig it!
And the help's not short, no.
So
you're diggin' your grave now
And the help's not short
SHORT!
I'll help you dig it! No
And the help's not short
Your speakin' my language!
Yeah!
And the help's not short
SHORT!
I will help you dig it!
~~~~
Work went pretty well today. The register was short. I had a little girl about 8 or 9 who wanted COFFEE. What the heck? And I had a pregnant lady ask for an ESPRESSO! I guess it's not really my place...
Eh.
I get to sleep in tomorrow!!!! YAYYY! And tonight I'm ordering a few Vonnegut books. Double YAYYY! I go to the doc tomorrow. Hmm...!
OH, a weird dream I had the other day:
I was driving down this road when this semi tried passing me. It was full of gas. And it passed me in slow motion but it just kept going and I could see what was going to happen. It went all the way off the road and into the woods and I thought "I should pull over and get out because something bad is going to happen!" I don't know why I got out. So I jumped out and went into a ditch. And I heard the explosion and felt the air move from far away. Then I tried covering most of my body but I looked up to see tires falling from the sky. And then afterwards when it was safe I walked away and went home. Then I saw it on the news and thought, I need to go back to talk to the news crew. They didn't even know I was involved. They didn't even know if I was hurt or not. So I went back.
And that was it. It was weird and really real.
Anyway, G'night.
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2005 25 July :: 9.16pm
MMMM
I do not know why...
But I am in love with Cheetos right now.
yum. hahaha
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2005 25 July :: 9.11pm
:: Music: Hell's Kitchen
I am getting worn out and tired. I'll be getting up at 4:30 again tomorrow. I was supposed to get a day off yesterday but no. Didn't happen. Now my day off is FINALLY on Wednesday but that is the day I go to the doctor. So we'll see. It'll be nice to sleep.
I just want a job where I have the freedom to make things I want. I miss school because of that. I had the time and freedom to cook whatever. Extravagant or not. And on those days at 6 when I was too tired to cook anything and being lazy...I should have taken advantage when I had the chance. I will be working almost every day...For the rest of my life. This is not life. I can't wait to work my way up to the top so I will be able to do what I want. I am stubborn like that. Anyway, I have to get to bed soon.
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2005 21 July :: 6.55pm
:: Music: Belle & Sebastian- Step Into My Office, Baby
Say my place at 9
Well. I am really glad to put in the day. It's done. Whoo. 9 hours. It was just crazy at the moment. I'm a lot more relaxed now. Anyway. My phone is coming in an hour so YAY. It feels really good to actually spend money and get some nice things. I've just been putting it in the bank or paying off my car. It feels like things are going quite smoothly. I really want a house. HAHAHA how crazy is that??? I just really want a house now. My grandpa is finishing building a really nice one and I want it. But blah...I'm not old at all. Why do I want all this crazy stuff? haha. But it'd be nice. Puppies are barking now. Aw. How cute. Hahaha. They really are though. Tomorrow is the bid wheelchair tournament so we're going to be crazy busy. Blah. Then it goes on Saturday too. Sunday is my only day off. But it's okay. I'm growing up. It's okay.
That is all.
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2005 20 July :: 10.06pm
:: Music: Elliott Smith-Let's Get Lost
My new camera rocks! I took this awesome picture today, too. And I worked which sucked. But I got to see Charlie :-) That was good. I need to go to bed soon, I kind of open tomorrow but I still have to get up at 5:30. Then I can pick up my new phone after work! Yay!
This may be a stupid question, but how can I upload a picture into my journal entry?
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2005 17 July :: 8.57pm
:: Music: Elliott Smith- Twilight
Don't want to see the day when it's dyin'...
I'm already somebody's baby.
It's been a good weekend. I don't have to work until Tuesday. I'm not counting down time like I always do. I'm growing. I'm getting better.
Oh, and I'm getting a new phone tonight. I'm excited.
I could make you smile...if you stayed a while...:-)
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2005 11 July :: 11.30pm
From the boards:
Holiday – It certainly sounds like you may have m/c’d.
Holiday05
That is what happened to me when I m/c. I am sorry to be telling you that. Call your Dr and you should probably go see him.
Hilary.
I dont have much insight for you, but i have heard of ppl being late on af...(more info)... supposidely its an early misscarriage. This may be what happened to you.
good luck!
~
So yeah. That is kind of what's going on now. I work tomorrow 11:30-6. (I close) Blah. I'm tired. G'night.
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2005 11 July :: 11.02pm
Hm...
Update:
Last Monday was Charlie and my 2 yr Anniversary! :-)
Worked today until 10:30 today
Then worked out for an hour.
Went to the bank.
Went to Charlie's.
Then I went shopping at Schuellers
Went shopping at Meijers. I got us groceries :-)
Went to Kohls and bought some jeans and held a skirt and shirt (mom's picking it up tomorrow YAY!)
Went back to Char's. He was awake then so we went to pick up the Explorer. He went to get a part, I went back and did some dishes and made dinner.
He got back and fixed the car.
What am I? A 1950s housewife? hahaha. No, it was fine. I actually didn't mind it a bit. I like it.
We talked more about the situation at hand. But now with getting his car fixed we probably don't have money to go to the doctor. Well, not really a good sign.
Good news: we're getting new phones. family-plan probably nextel or something.
It was cute, I got home and told my parents about what I did today and my dad goes "See Kim? I TOLD you. I know what's going on!" and I asked my mom what he was talking about and she said, "Oh he just said you were over there playing house."
Hahaha. That's funny. He doesn't shudder anymore at the talk of weddings and wife and all that good stuff. Hahaha. He is happy.
I am happy. Still confused. But you know, happy with other stuff.
Wow this is long. Well. I figure I write pretty cryptically sometimes so I wrote about my day. Hehe. Well, g'night!
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2005 10 July :: 8.06pm
Okay. I really am upset. I feel like I caused something to happen somehow. I really don't know.
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