eternal illusion

i'm tired thank goodness for 1/2 days. i love them. i went rock climbing last night. that was fun. and it also kept my mind off a lot of things. hey, the leaves are changing colors. bet you didnt notice.

today we have pit practice from 3-9 with the drumline. it should be kind of fun.

asdkfj;lasdjkf. i want to write about everything on my mind because i really want to get it out. but i dont want all of YOU to read it!! so i cant! and then when i try to tell someone about it, i cant give them the whole story because there isnt enough time, or they arent following what i'm saying and its just argh. it sucks. bah. i need to do something. i dont know what. just something. ooh my cd's done. thats 3. i love my new computer :)

ahhh. forget it. i'm going to go.bye bye.

1+1-1+1+1+1-1-1=0

argh. i hate decision making. i want to mooooooooove awaaaaaaaaaaaay.

It's that simple.


Not.

waste my days, drown away. just the thought of you in love with someone else.

so.. so much for studying for biology.

i take back what i said. about how i havent said the thing i wanted to say.. i realized, i havent said it, because its not true. its total opposite. and i dont even know if i want to be able to bring myself to say it. i dont think i do. because its not true. and if i said it, it would be a lie. confused yet? good.

it breaks my heart to see you hanging from the shelf.

i havent said it yet. i dont want to. dont intend to. dont need to, if its not true.

answer me this- is this what i'm going to be like for the rest of my life?


I haven't yet been able to bring myself to say it....

AND....

~*DUN DUN DUN*~

i still cant.

PA-THE-TIC. oye.

there are a bunch of 7th graders in my kitchen. they are quite annoying. well, not them themselves, just them being here. ooh, i like this keyboard.

sometimes my parents fight like they're going to get a divorce or something. just the things they say. ugh, its ..stupid. i dont like my home. i try to stay away from people because i just end up getting annoyed with them and fighting with them and getting mad. so i try to stay downstairs and in my room and stuff. but my mom has to be obnoxious and annoying and pick up the phone a million times and then click the reciever a million times, when ALL she had to do was ASK me to get off the phone if she needed it. which she didnt. she just wanted to be annoying cuz she's mad at me. yeah, well i'm mad at her too. ugh. i want to move to dani's house oh spud said that too didnt he. well yeah, its true. i do want to move to dani's. i have a blast everytime i'm over there and her parents are awesome too. i dont get in a fight with anyone if i'm there for more than 5 hours like i do HERE. alksdja;sodigj.

ok ok . sorry. i just needed to vent. bye bye.

blehhh

hmm. fun weekend. i dont know.

roar!

Jess says:
yes.
Jess says:
i will consume his entire face.
Adam says:
why
Jess says:
because.
Jess says:
he wants me to.
Adam says:
thats weird but go ahead
Jess says:
heh. i will.
Jess says:
cuz i'm a luss
Adam says:
luss?
Jess says:
yes.
Adam says:
what is that
Jess says:
heh.
Adam says:
tell me
Jess says:
haha.
Adam says:
really
Jess says:
no.
Jess says:
i like the german guy.
Adam says:
german guy
Adam says:
?
Jess says:
yeah.
Jess says:
from Germany...
Jess says:
ya know.
Adam says:
what grade is he in
Jess says:
11th.
Adam says:
uhuh
Jess says:
oh yeah, i have to tell dani that.
Adam says:
but im the first person
Jess says:
you're the first person what? that i've told?
Adam says:
yeah yea hey
Adam says:
yeah
Jess says:
no you're not.
Jess says:
i need to tell dani that he's in 11th, thats what i meant. but nm
Adam says:
ohhhhhhhhh
Jess says:
yeah.
Adam says:
would u go out with him
Jess says:
ha. he's from germany.
Adam says:
so
Jess says:
yeah. bottom line, he lives a bazillion miles away and he's a junior and wouldnt go out with me. but its not like i was planning on asking him out.. i just like him.
Adam says:
ohhhhh ok
Adam says:
what about me
Jess says:
yeah. cuz he's german, and he's cute.
Jess says:
what about you.
Jess says:
are you german?
Adam says:
no thats not the question...im polish
Jess says:
ha.
Jess says:
i only go for the german ones. sorry.
Jess says:
polish wont cut it. and you dont have an accent.
Adam says:
polish is right next door to germany
Adam says:
poland*
Jess says:
right.

oww!! my foots asleep. its very unpleasent.

well, i'm in current events right now and we're down at the computer lab. jessi's not here today for some reason:( so im just on woohu. i'm supposed to be searching for world news, but hey, i'm not the only one not doing that. the kid next to me is copying and pasting pictures of freaky wizards or something into word. hmm.. and i'm done with our assignment anyway. so...

oh yeah. i got a small part in the play. i dont know what it is exactly. i'll find out tonight. hmmm..

i STILL haven't decided if i'm going to homecoming or not. but i dont know. i was talking to gangles's mom last night and she kind of changed my mind. - long story. so yeah.

ok we have like 10 more minutes left. i'm trying to think of exciting things that happened today...but...there are none. biology makes me really sleepy and i dont understand the chapter we're on. oh well.

hmph. i better go. bye bye

"dont trip!"


I love you all so much!!!!!!!

WHERE ARE MY DAMN RETRACTABLE PENS?!!?!!?!?!?!?!?

*cries*

*sigh* i'm leaving now.

PS. Spud are you okay? what happened at rehersal tonight? :(

bah bah bah.

so...september 11th. hmm. not much to say about that. even though kevin already said it, i'm going to say it again. God Bless America.

erm. today was alright. oh yeah! we got a new computer! yay! even though...i'm still on the old one, but its still cool cuz we moved the other, bigger moniter down here. but the speakers suck ducks. i cant even hear my music over the sound of me typing....and i dont know how to fix that. oh well.

um. um um. i dont know what to talk about...pit tonight. bah. see you later.

*and i believe, i wanna be your everything and anything you need.*
hmm. okay.

which mr. men/little miss are you?
take the quiz & find out! :)
quiz made by

*I'm alright, I'm alright, It only hurts when I breathe.*

This is a really good song. I think it's really sweet.

Band practice was pretty boring. School was pretty boring and stupid and dumb. I still haven't decided if I'm going to homecoming. I still haven't accomplished my goals, and I still haven't finished my homework, or studied for my quiz. bah screw that.

ok. frustration. it's difficult to get out anger on a computer...but I try.

FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU. ....ugh.

no, that wasn't directed toward you. wait, maybe it was. i'm not sure. bleh.

wait. before i go. i want to say thank you to all my friends for putting up with me and i'm sorry that lately i've been a whiny bitch. and i love you a lot. and i want to hug you all right now.
*computer hug*
thats better.

hmm. i should do that whole personal entries for everyone thing that spud does.

ugh. i feel like crying and throwing up all at once. life sucks. my heart hurts.

*It's the way that he makes you cry. It's the way, that he's in your mind. It's the way that he makes you fall in love.*

last night was extremely crappy. today was pretty crappy. me and jess were going to go to the movies but, i guess that didnt work out. so.

this is a good song by the way.

ugh. i dont know. i dont want to go to school tomorrow. i dont want to work on the large quantity of homework that i have. and i dont want to go to PE tomorrow. bah.

life really sucks right now. and i still have to figure out if i'm going to homecoming or not. and i really need to decide soon. but i never will. because i can never decide anything. if i dont go, i'll regret it, if i do go, i will also probably regret it. but then again, i already bought a dress. BUT, that was purchased back when....a long time ago. yeah. so i just DONT KNOW. if i dont go then i want to find something to do that night so i'm not just sitting at home thinking about how everyone is there and i'm not. but i wouldnt know what to do anyway. argh. i hate trying to make up my mind.

whats new. this bites.