I've got my training to become a UPS driver this week, feel like my brain is going to explode trying to memorize all the information they're going to drill me on, but I'm so excited to finally start the career I've wanted since I was a kid.
I'm not a good person
Ask anyone who knows me
I'm mean and bitter
And a failure at everything that I say I believe
I'm not a good person
Ask anyone who loves me
I never write, I never call
I never think about anyone at all
I'm not a good person
No matter what I do
My exhaustion will consume me
And I'm too tired for the truth
I'm not a good person
I'm sure you're not surprised
It must be pouring out my sweat glands
It must be someplace in my eyes
I don't know why I am this way
I've been like this since I can remember
I try to keep up with everything I know I should do
But then I'll fall to pieces anyway
I don't know why I am this way
I'm not a good person, not even to you
I'm staying home because I can't stand the sound
Of another heartbeat in the room
I'm not a good person
Fuck it, you know it's true
I'm lazy, I'm a coward
I'm asleep all day in my room
I don't know why I am this way
I've been like this since I can remember
I try to keep up with everything I know I should do
But then I'll fall to pieces anyway
When I was a kid
My whole reality split
I was living a lie
I was a killing machine
I was a war lord
When I closed my eyes
I had to talk to the teacher
She talked to my mom
We had a real long talk
I had to talk to the teacher
She talked to my mom
They made the visions stop
When I was a kid
I was a total dick
To inanimate objects
The world beat the hell from me
I took it out on a tree
Great Illustrated Classics
I took it out on a fig tree
Out on the lawn
I took it out in the backyard (backyard!)
And behind Rite Aid
I took it out on the crates
And on the shopping carts
We were on another plane
I was the king of pain
In unspeakable cruelty
I set the mommy on fire
I set the baby on fire
Not even Jesus could stop me
I had to talk to the teacher
She talked to my mom
We had a real long talk
I had to talk to the teacher
She talked to my mom
They made the visions stop
I had to talk to the teacher
She talked to my mom
We had a real long talk
I had to talk to the teacher
She talked to my mom
They made the visions stop
Stop, stop
I have not posted on here in an exceptionally long time. I think I'm finally really happy with my life though. I enjoy my job, I get to see so many amazing, beautiful places and meet interesting people everyday. In a lot of ways it feels like I'm on vacation all the time, always going places people dream about seeing when they retire or something. Instead those places are where I get to go everyday.
Interviewing for my first "real" job on monday, full range of insurance, paid vacation, sick leave, "competitive salary" (the average in this job is $65k a year around here).
I am so excited, but terrified that all of a sudden I'll have to be a real adult.
Love is real
It is not just in novels or the movies
It is fact
And it is standing here right in front of you
So if you open your eyes
Oh what a sweet discovery
There is hope, and there is joy, and there is acceptance
So now let all of the light that collects on your plants
Keep you warm, make you smile
And I will be there with this pen in my hand
To record all the while
You'll be laughing so loud
That the house would shake with sound
And everything will be as new as the day it was found
Love is real
It is not just in long distance commercials
Or something that you thought you felt back in high school
So I will turn black and white
Become that horoscope you're reading
It predicts something good is on its way
Oh, and then I will send you the world green and blue
In a box through the mail
You can open it up, hold it right in your hand
And be glad that it's there
And be glad that you're there
Now, you can feel all the knots in your stomach start to untie
And suddenly it's not so hard to say you're all right
Love is real
It is not just in poetry and stories
It is truth, and it will follow you
Everywhere you go from now on
So if you'd just cast off your doubt
Then your lips would answer for you
Oh my darling, when you smile, it is like a song
And I can hear it now
And I can hear it now
And I can hear it now
Yes, I can, I can, I can
I can hear it now
I can hear it now
Yeah, I can, I can, I can
I can hear it now
I can hear it now
I can hear it now
Yeah, I can, I can, I can
I can hear it now
I can hear it now
Gonna go work for my uncle Rob at his place just a few minutes south of a canada for a few weeks here soon, gonna do it a few times. Thinking if I can save up enough money I'm gonna send myself on a vacation.
With Travelocity I can get myself a week in Japan for $1250 if I book far enough in advance, add another grand or so on top of that for food, touristy shopping, etc. and I'd have a great time.
Meant to post this last night after Donnie Darko, but I was le tired and forgot, but it just came on during shuffle in itunes!
All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for the daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head I wanna drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow
And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take
When people run in circles its a very, very
Mad world, mad world
Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy birthday, happy birthday
And I feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello teacher tell me, what's my lesson?
Look right through me, look right through me
And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take
When people run in circles its a very, very
Mad world, mad world, enlarging your world
Mad world
I'm thinking that soon I might start updating this in japanese, that way it's like a private diary, but if somebody is really interested, they can figure it out!
Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Such number as may be deemed to perform the stated task in a timely and efficient manner within the strictures of the following agreement:
Whereas the party of the first part, also known as "Lawyer," and the party of the second part, also known as "Light Bulb," do hereby and forthwith agree to a transaction wherein the party of the second part (Light Bulb) shall be removed from the current position as a result of failure to perform previously agreed-upon duties, i.e., the illumination of the area ranging from the front (north) door, through the entryway, terminating at an area just inside the primary living area, demarcated by the beginning of the carpet, any spillover illumination being at the option of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) and not required by the aforementioned agreement between the parties.
The aforementioned removal transaction shall include, but not be limited to, the following steps:
1.) The party of the first part (Lawyer) shall, with or without elevation, at his option, by means of a chair, stepstool, ladder, or any other means of elevation, grasp the party of the second part (Light Bulb) and rotate the party of the second part (Light Bulb) in a counterclockwise direction, said direction being non-negotiable. Said grasping and rotation of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) shall be undertaken by the party of the first part (Lawyer) with every reasonable caution by the party of the first part (Lawyer) to maintain the structural integrity of the party of the second part (Light Bulb), notwithstanding the aforementioned failure of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) to perform the aforementioned customary and agreed-upon duties. The foregoing notwithstanding, however, both parties stipulate that structural failure of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) may be incidental to the aforementioned failure to perform, and in such case the party of the first part (Lawyer) shall be held blameless for such structural failure insofar as this agreement is concerned so long as the non-negotiable directional codicil (counterclockwise) is observed by the party of the first part (Lawyer) throughout.
2.) Upon reaching a point where the party of the second part (Light Bulb) becomes separated from the party of the third part ("Receptacle"), the party of the first part (Lawyer) shall have the option of disposing of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) in a manner consistent with all applicable state, local, and federal statutes.
3.) Once separation and disposal have been achieved, the party of the first part (Lawyer) shall have the option of beginning installation of the party of the fourth part ("New Light Bulb"). This installation shall occur in a manner consistent with the reverse of the procedures described in Step 1 of this document, being careful to note that the rotation should occur in a clockwise direction, said direction also being non-negotiable.
NOTE: The above-described steps may be performed, at the option of the party of the first part (Lawyer), by said party of the first part (Lawyer), by his heirs and assigns, or by any and all persons authorized by him to do so, the objective being to produce a level of illumination in the immediate vicinity of the aforementioned front (north) door consistent with maximization of commerce and revenue for the party of the fifth part, also known as "The Firm."
I've applied for at least 100 jobs in the last few weeks and I haven't gotten a single freaking interview! I'm even applying in other cities now! This is bullshit!
Whatever, once I have some money, I'm leavin' this town and heading down south, setup camp in LA.
Current Plan
Disappear somewhere around June, set up a new life somewhere out east or in california, let everyone know where I went about six months after that.
