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2003 1 June :: 11.44 am
:: Mood: down
:: Music: Pink Floyd
*sigh
Yesterday was fucking amazing.
I’m at odds with Aaron now because I wouldn’t work for him today.
I spent 3 hours at work doing a job I didn’t need to do.
I found out that Andy is busy, so I wont be going to Lavonia like I planned.
I feel like I’m missing something…
Oh yeah, my grandfather fell down again.
Joe thanks for not making the day a complete waste. You’re a true friend.
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2003 31 May :: 9.48 am
Hey i HAD A CRAZY dream last night. I'll tell you all about it when i have time.
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2003 28 May :: 11.21 am
:: Mood: Hummored
Alcohol
I just watched a special about “American Drinks” on the History Channel.
It really got me thinking.
Here is two sites I found recently, I’ll summarize them.
http://www.nationalpost.com/home/story.html?id=2E79EAD3-26A0-4009-8A52-7D9FA96DF881
This says that recently (May 24th) the U.N. gave a list of peoples who have been oppressed and are in need of aid. A lot of these are self explanatory: Native Americans, Pygmies, etc.. Among the groups listed were the Celts (Basically there Irish). Celts are not a minority however…
“drugs and alcohol were the tools of an oppressive society" and that "too many young Celts were on drugs and alcohol."
So basically, Irish people (such as me and Jeremy) drink alcohol because of a forien pressure, and because of that need aid.
Wow, U.N.! That’s all I can say.
http://www.nationalpost.com/home/story.html?id=0E5EF40A-0DB7-406D-BCC9-992BE2DD9236
This one I can see, I’ve been there…
“Alcohol may actually lead people to be more cautious in their decisions rather than impulsive, according to a surprise finding by psychologists at Queen's University in Kingston, Ont.”
That’s my double shot of news for the day
Signing off,
Micheal K
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2003 26 May :: 11.40 pm
:: Mood: ...
Trying to stay hopeful
My grandpa’s leg is really bad.
My aunt called and said that he collapsed in Angola, Indiana (He goes there often for cheap gas, liqueur and what not) and wasn’t able to get up under his own power.
Then she said he spent the whole rest of the day lying on the couch.
When my mom called him at 9:30 (She calls him every day at the same time), he said he spent the whole day on the couch, but he didn’t mention any collapsing. This doesn’t mean it didn’t happen, because we Kup’s are the type of people who try not to burden others with our problems.
I don’t know…
I don’t mean to sound like a “Jesus Fuck” or anything, but if you guy’s were gonna do some praying anyway… mention him, alright?
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2003 25 May :: 11.06 pm
:: Mood: I just don't know
:: Music: Evanescence - My immortal
My internal debate rages
I don’t know if today should be counted as a good day…
I went to church and had fun (+15 points)
Went to McDonalds and had a “McGriddle Sandwich” (-5 points)
Went to Circuit City and picked you 3 CDs (Evanesance – Fallen, NIN – Pretty Hate Machine, and RHCP – Blood Sugar Sex Magik) (+10 points)
Went to my grandpa’s house (+5 points)
His leg has been giving him serious problems (-40 points)
Got to help him fix his “Garden Tractor” (+10 points)
Came home (-5 points)
Watched Dogma with my parents (+10 points)
I guess I’m even up to this point.
Oh yeah, I forgot to mention the million and a half times I searched for a reason for my existence only to find nothing. (-“A heck of a lot of points”)
I also forgot to mention the fact that I realized that (while reading through past entries) I will go on. I will get by with the help of the love of my friends and of course the guidance of My Lord and Savior. (+ “A hell of a lot more points”)
Last night was a blast. It really was. From this point forward May 24th will go down in history as one of the best days in my life. I wish I could stretch out the last hours of that day and dwell in it for the rest of my meager life.
Things are… good.
It was a good day.
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2003 23 May :: 11.59 pm
:: Mood: Good
:: Music: Taking Back Sunday - You're so last summer
Things are looking up
http://www.4degreez.com/misc/dante-inferno-test.mv
Let it be known that I object to this test’s definition of “using the lord’s name in vain”…
Guess I’m one of those good apples.
PURGATROY
You have escaped damnation and made it to Purgatory, a place where the dew of repentance washes off the stain of sin and girds the spirit with humility. Through contrition, confession, and satisfaction by works of righteousness, you must make your way up the mountain. As the sins are cleansed from your soul, you will be illuminated by the Sun of Divine Grace, and you will join other souls, smiling and happy, upon the summit of this mountain. Before long you will know the joys of Paradise as you ascend to the ethereal realm of Heaven.
Oh well, I can only hope.
I got my first paycheck today. I got paid more then I expected (9 dollars an hour), and I ended up getting a lot in my first check. I’m sitting pretty now.
I went to see Anger Management again with my brother-in-law. I need to be aggressive with girls I see. I wish I had a hetro- single male friend, which I could pick up chicks with.
Or even better a hetro- single female friend...
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2003 22 May :: 11.03 pm
:: Mood: tired & lonely
More then anything, I’m just tired.
Tired of being alone
I wish someone were here.
Someone, who I could hold onto.
*sigh
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2003 22 May :: 12.57 am
:: Mood: Read it and see
:: Music: Led Zeppelin - Kashmir
My day
Ok so here’s how my day went.
I got up.
I got ready for work.
Went to work.
Found out that they had nothing for me to work on after I got there, and they gave me the day off.
Drove home pissed that I had to get up this mourning.
Made earlier Woohu entry.
Watched the Matrix DVD I bought yesterday.
Went to Kalamazoo to pass some time.
Went to that mall and didn’t really get anything.
Went to best buy and got a “Teach yourself German” program for my computer.
Missed getting back on I-94.
Turned around on Andy Ave (next to Meijer)
Got caught at a long light. Looked around to pass the time. Noticed two incredibly hot females in the car behind me. They noticed me notice them and they waved. I waved back. They made out with each other (seriously)
Came home
Aaron called me, wanting to do something tonight.
I took a shower.
I tried to start learning German, but crashed the computer.
Aaron came and got me and we went to the mall, then best buy, then Game Stop dot Com. Aaron picked up two PS2 games.
We went to Aaron’s house.
We played the two games for quite a while (War of the Monsters, and Matrix Revisited)
I came home about 11:10
I check woohu, and found out the news about Jeremy and Mel
Thought I would get depressed.
Didn’t get depressed.
Realized that I am at least “recovering” from my… problems…(recovering, not recovered. Jeremy… You break her heart; I break your face… j/k)
Wrote this entry and realized what a good day it has been
After that? I donno.
It’s up in the air.
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2003 21 May :: 12.11 pm
:: Mood: Up in the air
So there I was.
Everything was white. I say everything, but it was more like an emptiness. White emptiness.
The floor I was standing on was a perfectly polished mirror. I look at myself for a second.
I begin to walk forward. I take several steps. I get unnerved. I turn around to see that my reflection had not moved. It just stood there, blankly.
I looked down to see a new reflection. A reflection of me only…not. He was somehow different. I look back to my old refection only to realize that someone was standing where I once had been. It was me… only not.
The image of me was somehow older… more confident… the way I… He… walked. He knew what he was here for… He exemplified assurance…
Image: Hello, Micheal.
Me: Where am I?
Image: This is of course just a dream. Nothing more until you make it more.
Me: If this is my dream, how come I’m not in control. How come there aren’t any beautiful ladies?
Image: No one said this was Your dream.
Me: Whose dream is it.
Image: That is not important right now. The point is that I have come with a message. You will be reborn, Micheal. You will be reborn into the Genesis.
Me: Genesis? Are you telling me that this is like “The Matrix”
Image: “The Matrix” does not really exist, Micheal.
Me: Yes it does.
Image: You only believe it exists. Do you really think that an Actor like Keanu Reeves could have such growth in Reality. Have you seen “Bill and Ted”?
Me: I don’t believe you!
Image: You will… Remember…
*beep beep beep
I woke up in a cold sweat.
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2003 20 May :: 12.12 am
:: Mood: Fucking GREAT
:: Music: White Stripes - Fell in Love with a Girl
As the world turns
Once again things are going great in the world. Things are turning out all right. I’ve got some much needed ego stroke-age (Thanks Lindsey).
My job is going better now. Certain jobs, which were once impossibly hard, are getting easier. The people I work with are becoming more like friends. We talk about things like normal people. (We argued for like 30 minutes about how Terminator 3 shouldn’t exist) Things are looking up.
I am working on making my relationships stronger. I’ve been talking a lot with Andy. I’ve spent some time with Aaron. I saw “The Punisher” today. It wasn’t as bad as I expected. Joe… just call me when you get back. We’ll do something.
I’ve also been talking a lot with the Lovely Lindsey. I just wish I wouldn’t have been so messed up in the head this year. We would have gotten along much much better.
“It might sound silly,
For me to think childish thoughts like these,
But so tired of acting tough,
And I’m gonna do what I please.”
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2003 17 May :: 7.25 pm
:: Mood: Super!
My day
If you see this before 9 p.m. on Staurday (Today) watch TNN at 9 to see the best show on T.V.
At work i found out something cool. After a supirior named Chris found out I was a wrestler, he said I should join his Ju-Jitsu club. Ju-Jistu is just like regular wrestling, except some minor changes. The biggest, is you don't get pinned in Ju-Jitsu. Submission only. Plus if I join, I could also go to other classes (Karatee, Ty-Kwon-do, Judo, Kick-boxing etc.) free of charge. I think this could be a good way for me to build self confidence.
Neo (Dumbfounded) : "I know kung-foo"
After work I did the same thing as yesterday only I changed my CD.
"She goes above and beyond her call of duty.
She is a slut but X thinks it's sexy.
Sex reminds her of eating spaghetti.
I am wasted but I'm ready. "
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2003 16 May :: 10.46 pm
:: Mood: *Grinning from Ear to Ear
:: Music: The White Stripes - Hotel Yorba
Sudden Calm
I don’t know what is going on with me right now.
I really am sorry to all those people who are in bad moods right now.
I found my therapy! I mowed my law and worked up a good sweat. Then I went for a walk listening to The White Stripes. I watched the sunset. I sang along. I felt good.
I don’t know what it was exactly, but things are in perspective right now. I took a good look at the road before me, and realized that I could be happy no matter what. Even if I’m single my whole life, even if I’m poor, even if I get my hand amputated, I will be happy, because that’s who I am. I will make the best of my situation.
“I’ll get by with a little help from my friends”.
Now sing it with me!
“Well its 1 2 3 4
take the elevator
at the hotel yorba
I'll be glad to see you later
all they got inside is vacancy!”
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2003 16 May :: 4.36 pm
:: Mood: angry
:: Music: RHCP - Can't Stop
I hate my life.
Well my job sucks.
Maybe if I slack off, I’ll get demoted to Busser or Disher, and get paid more, and have some fun.
I’m not any good at my current job. I screw up every food that I work on, and I screw up myself in the process.
Chicks dig scars, right?
How about grease burns?
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2003 16 May :: 12.43 am
We Are All A Part Of The MATRIX!
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2003 15 May :: 3.49 pm
:: Mood: interested
The real me...
Disney movie! What the HELL are you doing taking
this quiz, Goldilocks?! You're not a very
sexual person...in fact, you're probably a
virgin. You'd be better off trying your hand at
voice-overs for a Saturday morning cartoon.
What kind of porno would you star in?
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Alice is HOT!
You are Wolverine!
A loner by nature, you feel uncomfortable when
around those you don't know and even those you
do. You are awkward when it comes to
relationships, but fiercely loyal to those you
love.
Which X-Men character are you most like?
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RAWR!
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