Things are looking up again. I am happy, as you have probably read already. The whole deal with her right now is that I am happy if she is happy. I mean I guess the reason I was able to allow myself to develop feeling for her was because, he did treat her quite badly. But now, she’s happy. He’s not as much of a jerk, and of course ZORA WON. I fricken jaded.

I don’t know if I should keep quote my advice, it’s getting quite repetitive. However this one at least came a bit too late. Not that I haven’t been following this advice all along but…

Dee: “If you don't already... You should spend more time with M. Take her out to the movies, dinner, nice stuff like that, as FRIENDS... Show her how sweet you would/can be to her, so she realizes that there's better things out there for her.
Throw little hints too, and ask questions, like why is she with somebody who doesn't treat her as well as she should be treated. Or you could make those corny "if you were my g/f" lines, if she doesn't take kindly to those though, just laugh and shrug or something.
But just let her realize, that she can do better, and you can give her more than J has to offer. But don't outright say, "dump him and come with me" I don't think that would go smoothly... But i could be wrong. Sometimes directness is the way to go.”

Keep in mind, unbelievers, two things. This song is not about Emily, and I will only do half of it (Jason).

"It wasn't supposed to be like this
Another dose of unhappiness
I gave it all and managed to get shot down yet again
So I got drunk
Had sex with all your friends
You told me to never call your house again

Emily, you saved the day
Emily, when you threw me away

She was always such a pretty girl
Nobody like her in the world
A little piece of heavenly
That no one else could stand
I see her in my dreams at night
I see you when I close my eyes
I just can't seem to shake you, Emily"


Karu: "Yeesh...the old "nice girl, asshole boyfriend" deal...

This one usually plays out one of two ways...she gets fed up with him and calls it off (good for you), or their differences turn out to be a source of sexual tension and conflict that becomes the basis of their relationship...and they wind up getting married (not so good for you).

That said, ask her out. Take her dancing. Go to a jazz club. Have a quiet, candlelit dinner. Show her a good time.

If she says "no" from the outset, you're no worse off than before. If she says "yes" to the date but doesn't want a relationship, then at least the two of you had some fun. If she says "yes" to the date and decides to dump her loser jerk of a boyfriend for you, then you're all set, my friend."

I hope how I felt wasn’t violating any commandments.
Because if it is, I’m gonna burn.
I don’t regret how I felt.
Because I still feel that way.


Tenchi_Masaki: "I see this, and think... go kill J****.

It's obvious he doesn't deserve her, so... now, it's very uncharacteristic of me to suggest stealing bf's and gf's, but I think you should show her what a real man would do for her..."

I am so happy. After several months of wondering, I finally know. Sure it isn't the best way things could have worked out, but at least they are worked out.

Last night before my issues were resolved, I asked the forum goers at a certain website what they thought I should do. I'll tell you what they said once a post. Just to draw out this Cash cow.

DarkToaster: "When I hear this I think of that crusty 80's song about "Jessie's girl". Anyway, you either move on or you wait for M-girl to break up. If you wait, you become a girlfriend vulture. If you move on, you could be missing something great. No one can make that decision for you. Just be sure that she is worth it if you are going to wait."

You know, I wish that I had Jessie's girl,
I wish that I had Jessie's girl
Where can I find a woman like that
I play along with the charade,
there doesn't seem to be
a reason to change
You know I feels so dirty
when they start talking cute
I wanna tell her that I love her,
but the point is probably moot
Cuz she's watching him with those eyes
And she's lovin' him with that body,
I just know it
And he's holding her
in his arms late, late at night

The bottom line is, I could never ask her to choose.
I fear I already know the answer.
I am not 5.000000001 % of the man he is.
There isn’t a real choice.
He’s a better man.

Every 24 hours the planet makes one complete rotation.
Sometime during that time period, everything becomes askew. Day becomes night. Up becomes down. The act of loving is replaced by the act of despising.
But still the world turns.
Every 24 hours, everything falls back into place.
I wish from now on, the clock remains at 4:42 p.m.
It just feels so right.

Another minute has passed. And with it’s passing many things have changed. I once again can have faith in my dreams. I can finally look to the future and not dread the single life I will live. I no longer feel the pain of not having anyone to love.

I do have someone to love.


I love you all.

I hate it when happy endings go awry. I have to believe that something can be perfect. I find it hard to believe now.

I need someone to talk to.

Have you ever felt like heaven isn’t that far away? Like total bliss is so near you that you can smell it in the air? Taste it on your lips?

The feeling probably won’t last. But for now…

*sigh

I’m through trying to fulfill my dreams.
My dreams will never come true.
I need to worry more about my life than my dreams.

…my life sucks…

“A man gazing at the stars is proverbially at the mercy of the puddles in the road.”
-Alexander Smith