Mike's So Called Life

:: 2006 31 August :: 1.06am
:: Music: Christina Aguilera: Ain't No Other Man

I killed another laptop :-(

2 comments | Tell Me What You Think

brutisimo

:: 2006 30 August :: 12.08pm

I have not written on here in a long time. I guess it is because i am happy and busy. I love my apartment. I am happy at kohls and school is about to start and it WILL be my last year. i have made someobsrvationsabout myself and my friends and i realized i am tired of putting so much time and energy into people who put notime or energy inot me. i am content with the friends i have who are real and true. Almost all of them are faraway right now, but they are in my heart and thoughts and that is more comforting than having a million people here that mean nothing and know nothing about the real me. the gist of this diatribe is: near or far; i love you guys.

:: 2006 28 August :: 2.11pm

I'm not sure why Netflix articles grab me as much as they do, but...
Tear, Slap, Clack

:: 2006 27 August :: 2.09am

When she was a girl, she stuck a pin in a fat lady's butt to see if it would pop.

:: 2006 25 August :: 12.44am

I now have a working computer, and DVR. Yipee!

:: 2006 24 August :: 1.21pm

"I'm all for trimming the hedges so that they're presentable to company, but penile topiary is just freaky."

:: 2006 22 August :: 10.23am

Ok, so this is the second time I�ve been subpoenaed. Hrumph.

:: 2006 21 August :: 11.26pm
:: Mood: once again amused
:: Music: Moby - The Come Down

"Elmo is looking at a sandwich. Elmo is eating a sandwich. Elmo is crapping out the sandwich and writing his name on the wall with it."
Read more..

:: 2006 20 August :: 11.58pm
:: Mood: amused
:: Music: Monty Python's Flying Circus

Shatner Roast Quotes
�Andy Dick�s sole mission in life is to give AIDS back to the monkeys.�

(after Dick licks several roasters) �Why do I feel like Courtney Love killed Andy Dick and put his skin on.�

(to Jason Alexander) �Jack-o-Lanterns last longer in the fall than your shows.�

"I tried to Tivo T.J. Hooker, but my Tivo suggested I punch myself in the cunt.�

(George Takei to Shatner re: his hairpiece) �Your hair is like my men. Every year it gets darker and thicker.�

(Takei to Shatner) �Your acting is the only thing that makes me want to gag.�

3 comments | Tell Me What You Think

:: 2006 19 August :: 9.35pm

How do you accuse one of your frineds of outuing you to the entire class, with your own coming out letter? When graduated high school I came out to a few of my closest friends. While I was at the reuinion, I asked someone how they found out. She told me that she had gotten the letter I had written forwarded to her, with most of the senior class. Grr. I mean, I am out and everything, but still.

My record for the week: two dead computers and two stereos.

:: 2006 19 August :: 1.47am
:: Mood: pleased
:: Music: Queen - Bohemian Rhapsody

Oh man, this was one of my favorite books as a kid (probably yours too). Cool idea.
Sony Forecasts 'Chance of Meatballs'

:: 2006 17 August :: 10.32pm

Take a look for Jason.

:: 2006 16 August :: 10.46pm

(Denver, Colorado) Just a day after Republican gubernatorial candidate Bob Beauprez announced his running mate would be Mesa County commissioner Janet Rowland the ticket is in "deep damage control" after Democrats released a transcript of a March TV interview in which Rowland compared same-sex marriage to bestiality.

Appearing March 17 on the PBS program ''Colorado State of Mind,'' Rowland said homosexuality is an alternative lifestyle. ''For some people, the alternative lifestyle is bestiality," she went on to say. "Do we allow a man to marry a sheep?''

She claimed in the interview not to be homophobic. ''I have friends who are gay, I've worked with people who are gay, I have utmost respect for them,'' she said.

But, she added, on the subject of marriage gays and lesbians should not be permitted to wed.

''Some people have group sex," said said on the program. "Should we allow two men and three women to marry? Should we allow polygamy, with one man and five wives?''

Democrats say the interview shows the GOP ticket is too extreme for the state. The Democratic party choice for governor, Bill Ritter, demanded Beauprez drop Rowland.

''This shows just how far to the right and out-of-touch the Beauprez-Rowland ticket really is,'' Ritter campaign manager Greg Kolomitz told the Associated Press.

Kolomitz called Rowland's remarks ''insensitive, close-minded, derogatory and crude'' and demanded an apology.

Over at the Beauprez camp, campaign manager John Marshall said Rowland had informed the GOP candidate about the interview before she was selected as his running mate.

"We all say things we don't mean sometimes,'' Marshall said. ''That's what happened.''

It is not the first time the issue of bestiality has been brought up by Colorado Republicans. Last year at a press conference promoting a proposed amendment to ban same-sex marriage state Rep. Jim Welker (R-Loveland) also raised the comparison, calling the marriage issue "a line in the sand".

"A year and a half ago a lady in India married her dog," Welker said, referring to the marriage of a 9-year-old girl who married a stray dog in 2003 as part of a ritual to ward off an evil spell.

Republican political analyst Katy Atkinson of Denver said it's difficult to measure what impact Rowland's comments will have on the race. She said it depends partly on whether key swing voters view Rowland's views as extreme.

"Coloradans tend to not like or vote for anybody who is an extremist," she said. "If that comment is used to portray her and Bob Beauprez as extremist, that's a problem."

2 comments | Tell Me What You Think

:: 2006 16 August :: 3.15pm
:: Mood: headachy
:: Music: The Beatles - Three Cool Cats

IMDb Headlines
"Dick Goes Berserk at Shatner Roast

American comedian Andy Dick reportedly went berserk backstage at the Comedy Central Roast Of William Shatner on Sunday, licking screen siren Farrah Fawcett and biting a journalist. New York Post reporter Mandy Stadtmiller claims she watched Dick lick Fawcett, Carrie Fisher and comedian Patton Oswalt before turning his attentions to her. He allegedly groped her, tried to kiss her, proclaimed his love for her and then bit her hand, telling her, "Baby please, put in something nice. They're so mean. I'm not weird. Maybe I'm a little weird, they make me out to be a monster, I'm not a monster. I just want to have fun, baby please." She also accuses him of urinating in front of her and offering her cocaine. The show will air on Sunday August 20."

He couldn't find anybody better than Fawcett, Fisher, and Patton Oswald to lick?

"Phillippe Lands Two-Face Role?

Ryan Phillippe may be set to take over from Tommy Lee Jones after reportedly landing the role of Harvey Dent/Two-Face in the upcoming Batman Begins sequel. Reese Witherspoon's husband will join Heath Ledger, who has signed on to play The Joker, and new Batman Christian Bale in The Dark Knight. Crash star Phillippe beat Liev Shreiber and Josh Lucas to the role of the scheming district attorney, played by Jones in 1995 movie Batman Forever, according to internet reports. Academy Award winners Sir Michael Caine and Morgan Freeman have also joined the cast, while fellow Oscar winner Philip Seymour Hoffman is in talks to play The Penguin in the new film."

OK, I'm not a Batman expert, but based off that casting news, Nolan is basically exhausting the entire villian arsenal in one sequel/prequel/whatever the hell they are calling this one. Who does that leave, Mr. Freeze? God help us.

"Woods Dumps 20-Year-Old Girlfriend

Veteran actor James Woods has dumped his 20-year-old girlfriend, Ashley Madison, after the stress from the May-December relationship sent him to the emergency room. The 59-year-old star was distraught after his brother Michael died unexpectedly of a heart attack last month and was shocked by Madison's insensitivity during his funeral. Woods' friend Scott Sandler tells the New York Daily News that Madison showed up for the service dressed inappropriately "in a 3-inch miniskirt and chain-smoking." He explains, "At the funeral she was concerned about the amount of magazines she was in. Jimmy was on his knees with tears staining his shirt, and she was showing pictures of herself. Jimmy was so overcome by grief his blood pressure went through the roof early last week, and he had to go to the hospital. When he came out, it was like he had seen the light." The actor has known Madison, the pal of a golfing buddy, since she was five-years-old. Adds Sandler, "She's the anti-Christ. She truly has the soul of a moth and the brain of a dead trout."

Best insult since "Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries."

jedibumblebee

:: 2006 16 August :: 3.25pm

and this too...