70billion
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2003 2 June :: 11.12pm
Two Feet Forward
It was hard to see you leave
In someone else's car
It was hard to see you leave at all
But sense you've been gone
I don't cry anymore and I致e
Found out life is more than girls
I stand here today
Looking fear in the face
And I'm not scared of what will become
I値l take it like a man
So throw your rocks and push me down again
I値l get up from the fall
Push forward like before
Because I'm not scared of what will become
On these nights I drive alone
Think of what we had
Your words keep running throw my head
But I don't care what you said
Because if I was enough you
Would have stayed
I stand here today
Looking fear in the face
And I'm not scared of what will become
I値l take it like a man
So throw your rocks and push me down again
I値l get up from the fall
Push forward like before
Because I'm not scared of what will become
Five years from now
We値l meet after a summer storm
The street will be wet
And we値l walk under the star filled night
And hold each other
Like nothing had ever changed
I stand here today
Looking fear in the face
And I'm not scared of what will become
I値l take it like a man
So throw your rocks and push me down again
I値l get up from the fall
Push forward like before
Because I'm not scared of what will become
Crash Test
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JediBumblebee
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2003 2 June :: 10.22pm
:: Mood: confused
:: Music: Poe- Lemon Meringue
So the other day, went and found me a lover
Had a little hustle down under the covers
It was delicious to me.
Can't you see me there, daydreaming of the future
Oh my god I painted such a pretty picture
My friends, he never got back to me.
So my series of odd dreams lately seem to follow that pattern. I must wonder what it all means.
4 Raise and Ruin |
Crash Test
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70billion
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2003 2 June :: 2.55pm
:: Mood: good but i dont want to go to work
:: Music: The USED
This weekend went well i had a lot of fun. Saturday and sunday were both extremly fun. Yup dont have much ELSE to say so goodbye for now
2 Raise and Ruin |
Crash Test
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70billion
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2003 31 May :: 11.39pm
Ok so here it is If you have noticed that there is a lot "lol"ing going on these days, and we need to stop it so every time you get compeled to lol just say no and type "lrl" instead. It stands for Laughing really loud. If we work together it will spread like wild fire, so let get out there and start lrl'ing
1 Raise and Ruin |
Crash Test
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70billion
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2003 31 May :: 12.17am
:: Mood: Really sleepy but super good
:: Music: Authority zero-over season
Green pepers, Bacon, pineapple, w/ garlic butter cheese crust!
Today was a fun packed busy day and I am sleep. I went to school this morning and hung out with danielle amy and denee before school and then talked with ryan and jess during band and then(no and then) yeah thats enuff of that it wont happen again...or will it you deside, anyways then finished formulating plans for tonight, Freaking denee Put silver fingernail polish all over my hand, arm, three fingers and of all things my elbow. see thats why you never say they can paint one nail because one thing leads to another and pretty soon you are wearing it so guys next just run. I got my hair cut, went to the school and picked up danielle( I love that girl she is the coolest) but thats beside the point. We bought tickets for finding nemo and bought some pizza and went back to the millering house and ate it. Which was cool because i got to meet their dad he seemed to be a funny guy. It was fun hanging out with amy danielle and denee, then we started playing eucker(we all know i sUCK AT spelling, and yeah) with her mom but her mom and i where really the only ones who knew how to play which made it intresting to say the least. Then denee and i picked up dani to go to the piano residal. Danielle Was by far the best one there. and denee kept on claping in the wrong spot and some kid farted really loud and it was funny. and some other stuff happen but im to tierd to type the rest but it was fun!good night.
3 Raise and Ruin |
Crash Test
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70billion
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2003 29 May :: 10.52pm
:: Music: incubus-new skin
Yeah I feel like I have steped out of a lot of the confustion and its nice to be free of it. I love how things are going. I feel sorry for some people because they have yet to break free of it. Maybe they will see maybe someday. Yeah but I have been having a string of good days lately and thats alawys a plus. Yup
Crash Test
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JediBumblebee
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2003 29 May :: 3.55pm
:: Mood: crappy
I...am....sick.
on top of my beautiful brain tumor I have been blessed with the head and chest cold from hell.
ah, sweet kisses, i'm paying the price for them now....
3 Raise and Ruin |
Crash Test
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70billion
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2003 26 May :: 10.51pm
:: Mood: cheerful
:: Music: Rise Against- Heaven Knows
Im 18
Today Is my Birthday!!!!!!!!!!!!!the big one eight. GO smokes, Lotto tickets, and porno but all I will probley use my new age for is FIREWORKS OH YEAH. This morning I went to breakfast I had eggs in the blanket. Then we went shoping and stuff then around 11:30 Have a stake lunch with my dad and siblings and step mom. SHE MADE ME PINEAPPLE UPSIDE DOWN CAKE I love that cake. Then off to work at 2 o-clock untill 8 it sucked then went to jessicas we talked and stuff and it was fun, OH yeah get this my step mom is in the hospital and her water broke so Ether tonight I will probley have a new brither named zach who will have the same birthday as me yup so thats my day and I bid goodnight to all and it was a fine weekend. Thanks to everybody who Made my weekend enjoyable.
9 Raise and Ruin |
Crash Test
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JediBumblebee
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2003 26 May :: 7.55pm
:: Mood: frustrated
I hate to say it but sometimes my friends are all fucking retarded.
4 Raise and Ruin |
Crash Test
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JediBumblebee
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2003 24 May :: 10.00pm
The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Seventh Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test
Crash Test
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70billion
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2003 24 May :: 12.15am
:: Mood: happy
:: Music: Motion City Soundtrack-My Favorite Accident
Take a minute just sit right there and i will tell about how I became the______ finish that line
Today was fun and I hung out some people I really did think I would hang out with and it was fun and I met some friends which its also cool. Today was my last day of high school! I love the sents of spring. I am so happy and its awesome Things for me right now are going very nicely and i am enjoying every second of it because I dont know how long it will stay but Life is good.
4 Raise and Ruin |
Crash Test
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JediBumblebee
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2003 22 May :: 9.52pm
:: Mood: mellow
:: Music: Better Than Ezra- Good
it was good, living with you...uh-oh...
well, woohu seems to be doing crazy things with friends pages but i'm just gonna roll with it...
everyone really seems to be baring their souls in their journals lately...i think thats cool. i guess i can try to follow in the same pattern...
jason and i had some major issues now, but at least now they SEEM like they're coming to a close, I don't know...I'm sure, however, that he will correct me if I'm wrong..
class is kicking my ass, I really hate being occupied like that for the greater portion of my week (5:30-9:30 Mon-Thurs), I'm scared that I'll lose all my motivation and fail and ruin everything...I guess I'm in a negative mood lately.
so i finally went to the doctor about my headaches/blackouts/dizzy spells and its all a big mess. turns out i have orthostatic hypotension, which means my blood pressure drops A LOT when I stand up...but thats probably not all. they scheduled me for a CAT scan but then the doctor called me later today and said it was IMPERATIVE that I go to an MRA and MRI on a different day...its the same night as the foo fighters concert, but i dont go in until 11pm so i think it should all work out.. stressful stuff, just hoping i dont have a brain tumor or something strange like that...my head just hasnt been screwed on right lately.
its odd that my severely bizarre mental state might actually be tied to my medical issues...i'd love to explain my spaced-outedness by talking about a brain abnormality that i have. but we'll see....
Crash Test
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70billion
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2003 21 May :: 10.56pm
:: Music: Motion City Soundtrack-My Favorite Accident
You should check these guys out they rock
This so awesome I am ending my high school career with the best grades i have ever had. BAND: A TV Production: A Chemistry: A Stupid bst online thing: A Pre-Calc: B*****(im so happy with that) Gov"t: A And the only exam i have is my music vieo for tv production. And I have an 83 in pre-calc so no exam for yippy. ONLY 2 more days. And right now things are going very nicely. But there is one bad thing and that is I have to Work on moday wich is My birthday. No school but i have to work. Darn. But tonight ended very well i would have to say yup I would have to say that.
4 Raise and Ruin |
Crash Test
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70billion
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2003 20 May :: 11.37am
Well there are really only 3 people well maybe 4 but whos counting but any you are the only ones who can tell what it will do when I turn it on
1 Raise and Ruin |
Crash Test
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JediBumblebee
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2003 20 May :: 12.53am
:: Mood: restless
:: Music: RHCP- Can't Stop
The world I love, the tears I drop...To be part of the wave, can't stop....Choose not a life of imitation..
i'm getting the feeling that something's missing. i'm just not satisfied with anything the way it is right now..
i talked to kal and he helped me sort through a bit of it. but it doesnt mean that i know how to fix it.
i've just wandered through a week of my life feeling like I don't matter. I don't feel like I have a significant impact on anything.
I wish I knew how to change that.
1 Raise and Ruin |
Crash Test
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