Don't forget the sandwhich!

YAY! Your Travis </p>
<p align= Crash Test

:: 2003 19 May :: 9.45pm

:: 2003 18 May :: 11.42pm

Well she wants to live her life
Then she thinks about her life
Pulls her hair back as she screams
I don't really wanna live this life

:: 2003 18 May :: 10.16pm
:: Mood: calm
:: Music: Enya-anywhere is

I saw you Sitting up there then I look again and you were gone oh well I will see you Monday
Today I had a Band consert nothing exiting. I got a new pair of shoes. They are like dress bowling shoes if there is such a thing they are super cool. I guess my step mom is have cantractions every 9 minutes or something so Tomorrow I might have a new little brother named zach. Well There is another boring entry for you good night

4 Raise and Ruin | Crash Test

:: 2003 16 May :: 6.47pm
:: Mood: blah
:: Music: Centro-Matic- The Execution of Sixty-Odd Drummers

If you could look with your eyes and not so much with your hands...
so...much to my discontent, my email address WILL be changing....right now i do believe it will be jedibumblebee@hotmail.com but i still have to be able to access my old email to pull all of my old addresses and emails out of it. sigh, grumble, grumble.....

kal dyed my hair again today (thank you kal!) and it actually looks darn good if i can say it myself. downside being that i nearly blacked out AGAIN while he was doing it.. its getting to be a bit alarming. but i go to the doctor on thursday to see why my head's been freaking out on me.

i hate it when plans dont work out. i've had too many plans broken lately.

need to write a seven page paper on Indira Gandhi by tuesday. wish me luck. (did you know that she's not related to Mahatma Ghandi? i didnt figure that out until a few days ago)

and a party at nick's house tonight...how do i feel about this? i dont know. i may go. i may stop in. i may freak out and stay home and sleep instead. i have really not done much of anything today, and it feels good.

3 Raise and Ruin | Crash Test

:: 2003 16 May :: 2.52am

my fucking email is broken, again, it has been ALL day...so if anyone has any ideas for a new address, or at LEAST a reliable host for new email, let me know. at least i'll stop getting those pesky emails about eliminating my debt, getting free prescription medications, and enlarging my penis.

7 Raise and Ruin | Crash Test

:: 2003 16 May :: 12.22am
:: Music: Alkaline trio-youve got so far to go

The Matrix
Yup Its 12:12 and I just got back from seeing the matrix it was awesome. Jeff and I went and bought tickets after school for the 9:15 show then worked untill 8 got some taco bell and then went to celebration And Saw A FREAKING AWESOME MOVIE! yeah so that was my night and I'm sleepy so goodnight

:: 2003 15 May :: 2.49pm
:: Music: Revis-Caught in the rain

Tonight i work and then get my check go and cash it and maybe go see the Matrix if i can so that should be fun

1 Raise and Ruin | Crash Test

:: 2003 14 May :: 11.23pm
:: Mood: Another wonerful day
:: Music: Boxcar racer-letters to god

I hate shaving but i love a smooth face
Yup today was a half day and didnt really do much but ut was fun, tomorrow is pay day yippy-skippy(yes a dog makes more sense than mark but mark would be more funny) I'm going to g-perants this weekend which always is fun. Band consert sunday. Here is a robby update for those intrested about that girl i meantioned in my last entry I'm not sure how i feel about her but I know that I want to get to know her better because she is an awesome person some one I would really enjoy being better friends with, But as far a my status as being single i am really enjoying being myself and its good to be myself again. And I dont want to skrew with that yet my heart is so not ready for any rejectiion at all. Yes well I'm happy and this has been an awesome week and is still climbing yaaaaaaaaaahoo. Life is my very own bed pan so look out below

2 Raise and Ruin | Crash Test

:: 2003 14 May :: 9.26am
:: Mood: thirsty
:: Music: soft chatter of people around me

Good to be back
Today is another good day and i can take off my sweater and thats not very funny to make fun of me. Well on another note last night i couldnt fall a sleep because I couldnt stop thinking of this person and its good to feel this for someone new. But i am definatly going to play it cool for a little while because I couldnt handle any regection at all but it sill feels great. And today is a half day this week so far has been an awesome week. Well almost time for 5th hour so I'm out.

1 Raise and Ruin | Crash Test

:: 2003 13 May :: 11.26pm
:: Mood: AWESOME
:: Music: Taking back SUnday- Head Club

I feel grrrrrrrrrrrrrreat
Today was the best day i have had in a very very long time. I was happy because today I didnt go in the same path i normal did, I was worryed that When i saw jess today that everything i figured out and everything i convinced myself of would be gone but that didnt happen at all. I can finaly say I DONT HAVE FEELINGS FOR JESS MORE THAN A FRIEND and i think that is a gigantic step for me. And plus i have feelings for this really awesome girl whos name will stay disclosed for a little while longer but yeah so thats cool too. yup today wwas awsome. good night all

:: 2003 13 May :: 11.27pm
:: Mood: confused
:: Music: Pretenders- Stand By You

So if you're mad, get mad...don't hold it all inside...
really, all I want is confirmation.

waiting for a phone call...one way or the other.

i ought to be in bed.

:: 2003 12 May :: 11.37pm
:: Mood: distressed
:: Music: Stacie Orrico- Stuck

Every now and then, when I'm all alone, I'd be hoping you would call me on the telephone..
so when i needed to vent the most, the site was down. go figure.
anyway
i need a time machine
a can of spray paint
and some sleep.

:: 2003 12 May :: 9.16am
:: Mood: busy

me too

You're the boy cut. You love to get out and be yourself. Getting down
and dirty is a very familiar thing to you. You live an active live style
and you simply love it, you go where life takes you.

Which underwear are you?

:: 2003 11 May :: 10.35pm
:: Music: hillary duff-why not

Yup
So for first off I have no idea why im listening to hillary duff but i figure why not. I shaved today. my face is soooooooo smooth. Yeah Some people this will be wierd and crazy but its really not, I am happy for Jessica and Andy. I would just like this chance to wish them Them the best of luck. Some people will probley be like arent you pissed or sad and i say to you Why would I seeing two if my Friends happy it will be nice to see jess happy again because she hasnt been for a while. The part I'm not looking forward is people at school talking to me about and "I'm so sorry robby" or "I think its bull crap" So thats what I'm not looking forward to. I mean It might be a little wierd but nothing I cant handle right. well Good night

1 Raise and Ruin | Crash Test

:: 2003 10 May :: 8.48pm

I have so many mixed feelings about this hole thing. This means that I will most likely never be with jess again. Which make me really sad. Knowing I can never be what i used to be. And that we wont share those warm summer nights inder the stars because she has saved them for someone else. But at the same time if it makes her happy i would want nothing more than her to be happy. I mean Andy and Jess both deserve to be happy, If they could do that for each other that really good. But this means I will have to find something new to do with my summer, My big plan was to wait out the school year and be pacent and then win her back and have another awesome summer like the one before. Now the satureday a month ago were she told me how much she loved me and was so sure we were ment to be is only a faded dream, And I know most likely if her and andy hook up this summer I know she wont have time for me because On the pecking order for her time there many people higher than me and andy being on the top, but this is only a small price to pay for her happieness. After all there always a loser or someone who is hurt or left out and i would rather it be me than her or any of my other friends. Another thing that would make me sad if they went out would be everything that was jess's and mine would now hers and andys. Looking deep in her eyes knowing nothing could go wrong because you are with that one spiecal person. The long goodbye kiss's, Holding each other just because you can, Talking untill 3 in the moring, riding in the car wacthing her mouth the words to the songs we are listening to, Doing nothing at all and being happy because i'm with you and thats all that i need, Playing cards with her parents untill midnight, Anything sexual we ever did, Driving at night untill i have take you home, Talking about getting married and what our house would be like, Names for kids, the perfict wedding, the perfict honey moon, the perfict spous that was in your arms. I think andy is dumb for Still chasing megon be she will never be happy with him and she will just keep leading him on if he always chases her, And here is this girl that could make him so happy just looking for any attention he will give her. But then I am probley also stupid For being in love with a girl that I will never be with. If i could one piece of edvice it would Take whats given to you because you never know when it will be gone>